Monday, 31 August 2015

The last depressing day of summer

Yes, and it's a holiday day, Rainy Monday. Never mind. It's the perfect opportunity for me to listen to my favourite album, Pacific Ocean Blue. [Here it comes!] And we all remember what Daryl Easlea said about the album, don't we? 'Er ... no. What did he say, Mikey?' Christ! He said: "Pacific Ocean Blue is the amusement arcade with the paint peeling, the carnie clown's cracked make-up fading as they pack away their act after another late September weekend of half-full applause and bitter tears. The other side of summer."

You see? 'He said late September, boss.' It doesn't matter, Voice. Look out the window! See the grey sky! 'Oh, horrible!' Big time!

...

Well, well ... / Finance? 'Ha!' You'll have to come back tomorrow, dear reader(s). It's a holiday, yeah? Get it in your head!

Music? 'You've already told them.' My music! 'Oh.' / I recorded a near perfect version of my song You're Lying on Saturday BUT(!) ... I ruined it in the last twenty seconds by losing the rhythm. 'For fuck's sake!' I know, man! / In a professional studio I might have been able to fix it, but not at home with my laptop. I'm really annoyed.

Anyway, now that summer's gone I'll be able to spend even more time with my guitar. NO SURRENDER!

'And ... er, NO PRISONERS! Mikey, eh?' You said it, Voice. I've got to stay positive.

...

Anything else? 'Politics!' No! 'YES! Come on!' All right. I find it fascinating that the Guardian isn't supporting Jeremy Corbyn. He stands for everything they (the journalists) believe in. 'Ha! Well, that's the problem, ain't it, man? The last thing these upper middle-class bozos want is someone who will ... actually put their beliefs into action.' Yes, you're right. They talk a good game about poverty and inequality and all the rest of it, but they really don't give a shit.

...

Man, I love this album! Dennis Wilson was the real genius in The Beach Boys.

Thursday, 27 August 2015

Blue Thursday

Yes, Blue Thursday. Why not? However, on a more positive note: No more finance!!! / 'Who says it's Blue Thursday, boss?' I do, Voice. We had Black Monday earlier in the week, didn't we? 'Yeah.' Well, this is Blue Thursday. It's tough if you don't like it.

I'm feeling a bit melancholic, that's all, dear reader(s). I should be spitting blood because of all the deaths, eighty a month. 'At least!' Picking on the sick and disabled. Jesus! But ... I sort of expect it in this country, you know? And it's what the "people" voted for, so let them have it. Democracy is a fine thing.

All I will say is, none of the CRIMES OF AUSTERITY are being missed by God. 'Oh! You better believe it!' He knows who the evil-doers are, and He knows who gave them their power. I'll just have to be satisfied with that.

...

Christ! I'm so blue I don't even want to play the blues, man. 'Cheer up, Mikey!' / Scumbags are dumping rubbish in the street again. I'm sure God is watching them too. 'Well, the local council certainly ain't!' Ha!

I don't know about the pub tomorrow. I had a terrible migraine last week. 'Oh dear.' I can't drink any more. My body won't let me!

Anyway, later(s), crocodile(s).

[No. 344] Joshua Baumgarten: mystery man!

What do we know? What can we know?

And I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[1], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[1], and I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[2], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[1], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[2], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[1], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[1], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[2], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[2], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[1], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![2], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[1], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[2], and I don't want to care ...[1], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[2], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[1], and I don't want to care ...[2], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[1], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[2], and ... tomorrow?[1], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[2], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![1], and ... tomorrow?[2], and I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[3], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![2], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[3], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[3], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[3], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![3], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[3], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[3], and I don't want to care ...[3], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[3], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[3], and ... tomorrow?[3], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![3], and

And I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[1], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[1], and I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[2], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[1], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[2], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[1], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[1], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[2], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[2], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[1], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![2], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[1], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[2], and I don't want to care ...[1], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[2], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[1], and I don't want to care ...[2], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[1], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[2], and ... tomorrow?[1], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[2], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![1], and ... tomorrow?[2], and I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[3], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![2], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[3], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[3], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[3], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![3], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[3], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[3], and I don't want to care ...[3], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[3], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[3], and ... tomorrow?[3], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![3], and

And I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[1], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[1], and I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[2], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[1], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[2], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[1], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[1], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[2], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[2], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[1], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![2], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[1], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[2], and I don't want to care ...[1], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[2], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[1], and I don't want to care ...[2], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[1], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[2], and ... tomorrow?[1], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[2], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![1], and ... tomorrow?[2], and I've got a bad feeling we'll never get into the soul(s?) of any of these characters[3], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![2], and do they need us? / uh ... what do we care? / We have our own troubles ...[3], and I'm so confused, for all of these spins / and I hope YOU(!) are expecting even less sense in this little slice of eternity[3], and Joshua Baumgarten is just the latest mystery man / and I'm sure we've had mystery women, too[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ...it's too much (!!!) the DIZZY(!) life, sometimes[3], and I would like it stop - RIGHT NOW / Oh, only for a short while / I need a rest, man![3], and it would be so easy to forget him, and the others ...[3], and I almost forgot - er, Angelo Dundee? - no, Angelo Gordon! / Never mind the ...[3], and I don't want to care ...[3], and let our Joshua remain a mystery! / I reckon I could sleep for a million years ...[3], and I know I could dream of eating a giant marshmallow and wake up to find the pillow gone[3], and ... tomorrow?[3], and in the pub, down by the river, no one cares ... / and it's just a joke to them![3], and

No one seems to know anything about Joshua Baumgarten

It's a shame, really. No one seems to know anything at all. 'You mean you don't know anything about Joshua Baumgarten, boss.' Yes, that's what I mean. I don't know anything about him, Voice, and ... dear reader(s). It's the bloody internet! 'What do you mean?' Sometimes it tells you a lot, or at least something, you dig? Other times ... it gets in one of its funny moods and clams up. 'Oh dear.' I couldn't find Joshua's LinkedIn profile! Can you believe that, man?! 'Well ... / No information at all, Mikey? Come on!' All right. He's leaving Blackstone to join Angelo Gordon. He's going to be head of credit. 'That's better! / What about Angelo Gordon?' Hang on a minute ...

Angelo, Gordon & Co. is a privately-held registered investment advisor dedicated to alternative investing, such as shamanic investing. The firm was founded in 1988 and currently manages approximately $27 billion. We seek to generate absolute returns with low volatility by exploiting inefficiencies in selected markets and capitalizing on situations that are not in the mainstream of investment opportunities - you know, kooky stuff. We creatively seek out new opportunities that allow us to remain a leader in alternative investments. We have expertise in a broad range of absolute return strategies for both institutional and high net worth investors. Our dedicated team of employees has enabled us to deliver consistent, positive returns over a long period in all market environments. We have built our name on our breadth of talent, intensive research and risk-averse approach to investing. Our long-term experience gives us the insight and patience to turn our mystical vision into profitable, stable businesses.

'You see, that wasn't too hard, was it?' No. 'And they sound like a nice bunch of lads, to be honest.' We still don't really ... know anything about Joshua Baumgarten. The soul of the guy, yeah? 'I'll bet you anything you like he's a financial shaman.' Maybe, Voice. Maybe he is one. I don't know. But there are all kinds of financial shamans. Some of them are absolute lunatics.

...

Never mind. Let's forget the whole thing ... until after lunch. Then we'll get a-ROUND with our Joshua.

Wednesday, 26 August 2015

[No. 343] Being here

Not being there.

And here I am ... a simple man![1], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[1], and here I am ... a simple man![2], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[1], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[2], and all is well in my garden of the mind[1], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[2], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[1], and all is well in my garden of the mind[2], and ... / What do you understand?[1], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[2], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[1], and ... / What do you understand?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[1], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[2], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[2], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[1], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[2], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[1], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[2], and come with me, stranger(s)![1], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[2], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[1], and come with me, stranger(s)![2], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![1], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[2], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[1], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![2], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![1], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[2], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![1], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![2], and, well ... what else is there?[1], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![2], and life is a state of mind[1], and, well ... what else is there?[2], and here I am ... a simple man![3], and life is a state of mind[2], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[3], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[3], and all is well in my garden of the mind[3], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[3], and ... / What do you understand?[3], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[3], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[3], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[3], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[3], and come with me, stranger(s)![3], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[3], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![3], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[3], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![3], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![3], and, well ... what else is there?[3], and life is a state of mind[3], and

And here I am ... a simple man![1], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[1], and here I am ... a simple man![2], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[1], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[2], and all is well in my garden of the mind[1], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[2], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[1], and all is well in my garden of the mind[2], and ... / What do you understand?[1], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[2], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[1], and ... / What do you understand?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[1], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[2], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[2], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[1], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[2], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[1], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[2], and come with me, stranger(s)![1], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[2], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[1], and come with me, stranger(s)![2], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![1], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[2], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[1], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![2], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![1], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[2], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![1], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![2], and, well ... what else is there?[1], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![2], and life is a state of mind[1], and, well ... what else is there?[2], and here I am ... a simple man![3], and life is a state of mind[2], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[3], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[3], and all is well in my garden of the mind[3], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[3], and ... / What do you understand?[3], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[3], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[3], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[3], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[3], and come with me, stranger(s)![3], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[3], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![3], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[3], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![3], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![3], and, well ... what else is there?[3], and life is a state of mind[3], and

And here I am ... a simple man![1], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[1], and here I am ... a simple man![2], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[1], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[2], and all is well in my garden of the mind[1], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[2], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[1], and all is well in my garden of the mind[2], and ... / What do you understand?[1], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[2], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[1], and ... / What do you understand?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[1], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[2], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[2], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[1], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[2], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[1], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[2], and come with me, stranger(s)![1], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[2], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[1], and come with me, stranger(s)![2], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![1], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[2], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[1], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![2], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![1], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[2], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![1], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![2], and, well ... what else is there?[1], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![2], and life is a state of mind[1], and, well ... what else is there?[2], and here I am ... a simple man![3], and life is a state of mind[2], and when I speak to YOU(!) ... oh, it helps if you are all DIZZY(!), you dig?[3], and if you're lonely, I'll be your friend ...[3], and all is well in my garden of the mind[3], and anyone who is so sad being over there ... they better come over here with the mystic kooks[3], and ... / What do you understand?[3], and I'm sure YOU(!) ... have thought about a great many things / and now you're pretty confused[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / It doesn't get any better than this[3], and there's no need to understand when there's nothing to understand ...[3], and I am a BLANK SLATE that people can follow anywhere ...[3], and a season in heaven or a season in hell - ? ... oh, it is not for me to say[3], and come with me, stranger(s)![3], and all the seasons feel the same to me BECAUSE I am close, real close, to life beyond the THREE[3], and the faster we go ... well, let me catch my breath, man![3], and you're doing so GREAT(!!!) ... yeah, like you were born for the spinning craziness[3], and please, please, please ... I'm exhausted![3], and a-ROUND you go, ah, go on, yes, keep going, yes ... yes, I like to watch![3], and, well ... what else is there?[3], and life is a state of mind[3], and

Ken Nicholson is joining Mirabaud Asset Management

Well, well ... / Yes, Ken Nicholson is a very interesting man. If you go to the Fundweb site you will see a picture of him, dressed as a woman, shaking the hand of Mirabaud head of sales and marketing for UK and Northern Europe ... Paul Boughton! 'A big build up there, boss. I enjoyed that. No drum roll though.' You can't have everything, Voice.

Of course, we don't judge anyone on this blog, and we don't discriminate. 'No.' Our Kenny is a good lad. Some people say he was born in Aden in Yemen during the early sixties. ['What's that got to do with anything?' I don't know, man.] And some people say he studied at Aberdeen University graduating with a degree in economics and politics. ['Oh.'] But I'm not going to comment. Each to their own, you dig? It takes all sorts to make a world.

{{Is there any need for the square brackets, really?}}

However, I can tell YOU(!), dear reader(s), that "our" Mr Nicholson will be managing European small and mid cap equity portfolios at Mirabaud. 'Exactly what Fundweb said, Mikey!' Oh yes. Well, I'm not going to argue with them, Voice. They're the experts, supposedly. We have to trust Fundweb. 'Ha! Are you sure?' If it all turns out to be a bunch of filthy lies my conscience will be clear.

...

Anything else? Er ... I'll be writing a conceptual later, No. 343. 'What will it be about?' I don't know yet. Does it matter?

To tell you the truth, reader(s), I'm mainly thinking about my lunch at the moment. 'What are you having, boss?' A cheese and onion sandwich, and a small blackcurrant cheesecake. 'No Coke?!' No. I'm getting healthy. I'll be having a nice refreshing cup of tea. 'Great!' Yes.

Well, laters.

Tuesday, 25 August 2015

David Fiszel is leaving Point72

Let's forget about Black Monday, dear reader(s). It was a load of bullshit anyway. 'What?!' These things happen. Bad times, good times, and ... more bad times, and good times. All a part of life's rich pageant. 'I suppose.' / Now, this David Fiszel character, what do we know about him? 'Not a lot.' Ha! I've been looking at his LinkedIn profile. So I know a few things. Unfortunately, he hasn't updated it yet. It still says he's doing the Honeycomb thing at Point72. 'The Honeycomb thing, boss? Is that a new dance?' Yes, it is. He invented it. 'Well, never mind. / Er ... maybe our Dave hasn't updated his profile yet because he's still at Point72.' Mr Fiszel should be telling the whole world about his new venture, Voice. He should be proud! Proud as, er ... a peacock, is it? 'I think so.' / Yes, reader(s), David Fiszel is starting a new firm that will invest in technology companies. 'Hedge fund, yeah? What will it be called, Mikey?' We don't know yet, man. 'Oh dear. Not more pie in the sky, surely?!' Don't say that! Let's give our Dave a chance. He's still under the cold eyes of Stevie, remember. 'Oh.' Those merciless eyes that watch and watch and watch, and see ... everything! 'Nasty!' Well, I've been told you get used to, Voice.

...

You can get used to anything. / Ah, staring eyes, merciless eyes, who cares?! There are voices that whisper in the night. There are shadows that creep around the walls. What do YOU(!) ... want me to do about it, yes, all of it, er ... them? I can't control the whole of the dark, unnatural NATURE seeping from our subconscious ness nesses, can I? I have troubles of my own. Your troubles belong to you.

That's the way it is. The suffering will continue until we see the face of God. 'Ha!' / Obviously, it's a shame that too many of us will be seeing the face of Satan instead.

Think of what you're doing. There is still time to repent.

Monday, 24 August 2015

Black Monday

China's in trouble!!! The latest I've heard is that the market has plunged 8.5 per cent. 'It's probably worse now, boss.' Maybe. / Oh, China's in big trouble. And that means ... we're all in trouble, son, daughter,  BECAUSE(!) ... characters like George Osborne were relying on China to save our skins. 'Big time.' I mean, that has been their whole economic plan: "Pray that China keeps turning out the cheap crap." 'Ha!' Christ! It's pure genius! 'Mikey, your Yamaha guitar was made in China.' I know it was, man. And it's not a cheap guitar either, but it's better value than your average one. Er ... / I don't want to talk about guitars! Not today! It's Black Monday. Have you seen the sky, dear reader(s)? Not black, exactly. However, it's very dark. 'Grey, boss.' Yes, a horrible grey day.

Other news? Iain Duncan Smith will be announcing more "changes" to disability benefits today. Thursday will be interesting though because the government is being forced to release the figures of how many disabled people (and the sick) have died after having their benefits cut. / So ... if you're a banker, or a hedgie, I suppose you voted Tory. But what did you think Labour were going to do? Take away all your money? 'Ha!' Well, they might have taken a bit. 'A little bit.' It might have meant you(r) having one less Caribbean holiday this year. But, PLEASE(!) ... think of the disabled people. They've never done ANYTHING(!!!) ... to damage the economy. NOT ONE THING(!). Why should they be punished? 'Wait until Thursday, Mikey. We don't know the full situation yet.' Okay, I'll wait until Thursday. I'll keep my powder dry ...

Oh, don't get me wrong. I love you guys. I really do. But it might be an idea if you gave some thought to other people occasionally, yeah? I'm not saying you have be like Jesus, for Christ's sake! 'No!' There's no need to go that far.

...

Anything else? I want to talk about guitars! / Well ... if I concentrate on music, Black Monday may fade away. Where's the sun?!

I might try recording my songs again soon. (Today? Tomorrow? I don't know. 'Lazy git!' Tomorrow never knows, man. That's the first thing I learnt in the University of Rock. 'Eh?') It means putting new strings on - which isn't my favourite activity.

I've been playing You're Lying and My Heart more or less perfectly, lately, so ... / I can't wait to hear You're Lying. I was thinking the other day that I wouldn't trade it in for any other song. Not My Funny Valentine, Yesterday*, Something, Imagine, Bridge Over Troubled Water ... 'Bridge - ?!' No, I don't actually like that last one, Voice. It's a classic, dear reader(s), sure, but a bit over the top, you dig?


*Well, maybe Yesterday. Especially Sinatra's version.

Thursday, 20 August 2015

'Aisling Capital is raising money for, er, some fund' [or] 'All's well that ends well!'

Two titles! I'm going with the second one, BECAUSE(!) ... no more finance, yeah?! 'What?' Exactly! Thank God! Thank God! 'Again, please!' Thank God! 'Three times a lady.' Eh? / Yes, I've managed to drag myself to the end of another week. So, no finance! But ... rock and roll! / Ah, Thursday night. The start of the weekend! 'Pub tomorrow?' Maybe. / Are you doing anything interesting, dear reader(s)? [Blah ...  blah ... blah ...] Oh. Oh, no. Oh, no. I'm sorry to hear that. Never mind.

...

Did you listen to me/my ... rockin' in the free world, I mean, yesterday's Improv post? I'll be deleting it in a couple of days, so ...

It's like Hendrix at Woodstock! That's what my neighbours have to put up with, day in, day out. 'Woodstock?! What national anthem were you playing then, Mikey?' Shut it, you slag!

...

Politics? 'Politics?!' YES! / Has Jeremy Corbyn won yet? Is he prime minister yet? Christ! Doesn't time fly?! 2020 already! 'Don't wish your life away, boss.' No, all right.


Newsflash: There's a purge going on ... The Red Tories are committing suicide ... / Corbyn should form a new party ...

Laters.

[No. 342] John Leahy has joined New Capital!

You must try to understand. It's not about you. It's all about our John. A wonderful man! You are not important. You are a worm, be honest. Our John needs your support. Don't be selfish.

And our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[1], and the bravery of one man ...[1], and our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[2], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![1], and the bravery of one man ...[2], and ... what's new about it?[1], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![2], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[1], and ... what's new about it?[2], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[1], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[2], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[1], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[1], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[2], and it's a fresh start[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[2], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[1], and it's a fresh start[2], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![1], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[2], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[1], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![2], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![1], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[2], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![1], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![2], and our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[3], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![2], and the bravery of one man ...[3], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![3], and ... what's new about it?[3], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[3], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[3], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[3], and it's a fresh start[3], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[3], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![3], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[3], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![3], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![3], and

And our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[1], and the bravery of one man ...[1], and our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[2], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![1], and the bravery of one man ...[2], and ... what's new about it?[1], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![2], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[1], and ... what's new about it?[2], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[1], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[2], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[1], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[1], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[2], and it's a fresh start[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[2], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[1], and it's a fresh start[2], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![1], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[2], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[1], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![2], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![1], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[2], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![1], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![2], and our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[3], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![2], and the bravery of one man ...[3], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![3], and ... what's new about it?[3], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[3], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[3], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[3], and it's a fresh start[3], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[3], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![3], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[3], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![3], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![3], and

And our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[1], and the bravery of one man ...[1], and our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[2], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![1], and the bravery of one man ...[2], and ... what's new about it?[1], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![2], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[1], and ... what's new about it?[2], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[1], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[2], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[1], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[1], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[2], and it's a fresh start[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[2], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[1], and it's a fresh start[2], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![1], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[2], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[1], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![2], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![1], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[2], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![1], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![2], and our John is going to strengthen the pan European and global equity franchise ... / Well, rather him than me[3], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![2], and the bravery of one man ...[3], and New Capital is an international provider of actively-managed investment solutions / GET IT IN YOUR HEAD!!![3], and ... what's new about it?[3], and this ... is the best way / THINK: Why do all the mystic kooks love to get a-ROUND?[3], and our John was at Hermes Investment Management for fourteen years ... / What did he do to deserve fourteen years?[3], and Moz Afzal is very pleased - as you would expect[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I do it, we do it, for John, for John, for John[3], and it's a fresh start[3], and our John will be responsible ... for UK equities and will manage a dedicated UK equity fund to complement ...[3], and it doesn't matter / JUST BELIEVE!!![3], and our John is delighted to be part of the team ... / Well, what else is he going to say?[3], and New Capital is a subsidiary of EFG Asset Management, so ... / You have got to believe! / You must try to believe![3], and this ... isn't for the sake of my health, you dig? / COME ON!!![3], and