Wednesday, 31 July 2013

[No. 138] This is No. 138

Right after No. 137? Incredible!

And I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[1], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[1], and I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[2], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[1], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[2], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![1], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[2], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[1], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![2], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[1], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[2], and YOU(!)?[1], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[2], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[1], and YOU(!)?[2], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[1], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[2], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[1], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[2], and ON and ON and ON[1], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[2], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![1], and ON and ON and ON[2], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![1], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![2], and I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[3], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![2], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[3], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[3], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![3], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[3], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[3], and YOU(!)?[3], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[3], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[3], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[3], and ON and ON and ON[3], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![3], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![3], and

And I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[1], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[1], and I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[2], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[1], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[2], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![1], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[2], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[1], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![2], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[1], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[2], and YOU(!)?[1], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[2], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[1], and YOU(!)?[2], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[1], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[2], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[1], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[2], and ON and ON and ON[1], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[2], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![1], and ON and ON and ON[2], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![1], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![2], and I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[3], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![2], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[3], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[3], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![3], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[3], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[3], and YOU(!)?[3], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[3], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[3], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[3], and ON and ON and ON[3], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![3], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![3], and

And I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[1], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[1], and I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[2], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[1], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[2], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![1], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[2], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[1], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![2], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[1], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[2], and YOU(!)?[1], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[2], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[1], and YOU(!)?[2], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[1], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[2], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[1], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[2], and ON and ON and ON[1], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[2], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![1], and ON and ON and ON[2], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![1], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![2], and I'm pretty sure No. 139 will be next[3], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![2], and I like to KNOW where I am, and I like to KNOW ... there's order in the universe[3], and I feel so secure a-ROUND here on the 1 / 3 / 8[3], and this ... is my UNIVERSE!!![3], and welcome to ... my ORDER, my STRENGTH, my PURITY, and ... 'You're welcome to it!' ... shut it, Voice[3], and I'm FREE from the HELL of MONEY here ... and even free from thought, sometimes[3], and YOU(!)?[3], and ... oh, don't worry about what's coming next: surely, you KNOW what's coming next, yes?[3], and it'll be 139 ... 140 ... 141 ... 142 ... 143 ... 144 ... 145 ... 146 ... 147 ... er ... '148?!?!?!'[3], and ... YES! 148, then 149! ... and on and on and on[3], and ON and ON and ON[3], and if you've got NEWS for me, I've got NEWS for you: you can stuff it, man!!![3], and ONE, and TWO, and THREE, come on!!![3], and

Sandeep Aggarwal has been arrested by the Feds!

Shocking! 'Who the hell is Sandeep Aggarwal, Mikey?!' That's what is so shocking, Voice. I have absolutely no idea. 'Oh. I guess he's just another one of these sad finance people who can't stay out of trouble.' / Hang on! Sandeep used to be an internet analyst at Collins Stewart. The Feds say he passed on inside information to a trader at SAC Capital Advisors. 'Not SAC again! The authorities in America really have a hard-on for that firm, don't they?' They certainly do, Voice. 'I wouldn't want to be Stevie Cohen, man.' Stevie will be all right. He's the Teflon Hedgie. He'll just start another company.

_________________________


I'm listening to Bob Dylan's Bringing It All Back Home. He goes into a bank: "They asked me for some collateral, and I pulled down my pants." Strange!

Music, man. / I played my guitar for about ten minutes this morning. There are still chords I can't get though because of my weak fingers. Piano would be easier. I used to be better on piano, anyway. But I want to write on the guitar. Imagine if Dylan wrote Mr Tambourine Man on the piano. It wouldn't sound right. / Even with my damaged hand, You're Lying is quite easy to play on the guitar. And I'm thinking My Heart might sound good with a piano arrangement. I don't know. I haven't finished the lyric for You're Lying yet. / The other (third) song is recorded (demo) and ready to go. I've been sitting on it for over a year, and it's good enough to be a number one hit for any artist who wants it. / I'll speed up once I have the three great songs I need. As I keep saying: if you can write three great songs, you can write fifty.

Lunch soon. Cheese and pickle sandwich. / I'll be working on a conceptual later.

Tuesday, 30 July 2013

Rhys Petheram and Alastair Gunn at Jupiter?

I don't know, man. I don't know what they're talking about. Rhys and Alastair reckon this bullshit recovery in the British economy is really wonderful and that it's more sustainable than the recovery in America. NONSENSE! There ain't gonna be no real fucking recovery! Not while we have clueless wankers running the country. Unemployment is out of control and being hidden with workfare, sanctions, and all kinds of other scams. Most new jobs only pay the minimum wage. It's bullshit, man! It's a bullshit recovery.

We don't make anything any more. We can't do anything. Call centres, and making coffee - oh, we're good at that shit. Do you want fries with your depression? Brilliant! / Personally, I just want to write my songs and then fuck off to Malibu. Reader(s), you can say I'm crazy if you want, but I'll take my chances in Malibu.

And it's a miracle I'm even writing this post, man. 'Why, Mikey?' I'll tell you why, Voice: because those dongle internet twats can't deliver a signal in London, that's why. I don't live out in the countryside. No, I live in London. 'Christ! One of the greatest cities in the world. And they can't deliver a signal. Is it a free service?' Free?! It costs me over £15 a month! 'Are they a criminal gang, boss?' They must be. I can't think of any other explanation.

Burt Bacharach doesn't have to live like this.

Monday, 29 July 2013

Glen Galemmo has been accused of some Ponzi nonsense

Are people still doing all the Ponzi stuff? A bit old hat, isn't it? Never mind. / Glen Galemmo is being sued by investors because they reckon he's been running a Ponzi scheme with his Queen City Investments that has cost them hundreds of millions of dollars, or tens, maybe. / Well, I don't know who to believe, and I'm not getting involved. It's in America, anyway. What's it got to do with me? NOTHING! And even if it were happening in England, what would it have to do with me? NOTHING! / I've got problems of my own. I'm still waiting for my cubital fingers to start working again.

Just some words, for a while. / Not much in the mood for this, to tell you the truth. / I'm glad it's a bit cooler now, but I don't like the rain. / I've been looking at a Yamaha keyboard on Amazon. I think they've put the price up recently. Maybe I should give my guitar fingers another week or two. / I'm taking the vitamins, B6. They say that B6 helps you remember your dreams, and it even helps with lucid dreaming. And I can report: it's all true. Unfortunately, I haven't been having any musical dreams lately. I wish I could remember one of the songs I dreamt about a month ago. It sounded awesome, a really great song. It would save me a lot of work. / Er ...

It's Monday morning. What do you want from me, dear reader(s)? / I couldn't work in a bank or a hedge fund. The way I'm feeling. How do you do it? How do you get out of bed in the morning? A day like today. I know it might rain later, but you could go for a walk in the park. Why don't you spend the whole afternoon in the pub? Tell your boss to fuck off. You don't want to be dealing with funds and shit in the middle of summer. You've got human rights, man.

Thursday, 25 July 2013

[No. 137] One of these days I'll get me some real news

My news, my truth.

And I get so BORED, man[1], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![1], and I get so BORED, man[2], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[1], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![2], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[1], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[2], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![1], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[2], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[1], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![2], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[1], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[2], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![1], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[2], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![1], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![2], and I'm dreaming[1], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![2], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[1], and I'm dreaming[2], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[1], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[2], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[1], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[2], and it'll be ... whatever[1], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[2], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![1], and it'll be ... whatever[2], and I get so BORED, man[3], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![2], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![3], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[3], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[3], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![3], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[3], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[3], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![3], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![3], and I'm dreaming[3], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[3], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[3], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[3], and it'll be ... whatever[3], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![3], and

And I get so BORED, man[1], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![1], and I get so BORED, man[2], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[1], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![2], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[1], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[2], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![1], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[2], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[1], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![2], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[1], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[2], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![1], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[2], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![1], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![2], and I'm dreaming[1], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![2], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[1], and I'm dreaming[2], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[1], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[2], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[1], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[2], and it'll be ... whatever[1], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[2], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![1], and it'll be ... whatever[2], and I get so BORED, man[3], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![2], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![3], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[3], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[3], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![3], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[3], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[3], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![3], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![3], and I'm dreaming[3], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[3], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[3], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[3], and it'll be ... whatever[3], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![3], and

And I get so BORED, man[1], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![1], and I get so BORED, man[2], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[1], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![2], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[1], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[2], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![1], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[2], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[1], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![2], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[1], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[2], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![1], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[2], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![1], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![2], and I'm dreaming[1], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![2], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[1], and I'm dreaming[2], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[1], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[2], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[1], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[2], and it'll be ... whatever[1], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[2], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![1], and it'll be ... whatever[2], and I get so BORED, man[3], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![2], and it'll be Stevie Cohen with his religious cult, or Bobby Diamond with his sex change - something EXCITNG!!![3], and I'm the CHAIRMAN of the BORED[3], and that's why I get a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND out of my head[3], and it'll be Mike Corcell turns vegetarian, or Toby Lingard gets a new, tough-guy name - something UNBELIEVABLE!!![3], and maybe I'll make the news the WAY / I like it[3], and you could argue that it already is ... my way ... to some degree[3], and this is why I feel so alive ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND in my soul, yeah![3], and it'll be Lloyd Blankfein abducted by aliens, or Louis Villa in a tutu - something BIZARRE!!![3], and I'm dreaming[3], and when you're BORED you've got to use your imagination to get outside yourself, you dig?[3], and I'm dreaming I'm DREAMIMG[3], and I'm not pushing COLD REALITY to a bunch of squares who can't let go of sad news[3], and it'll be ... whatever[3], and I want more this ... a-ROUND and a-ROUND and a-ROUND ... here, not there, here - ![3], and

"Capital Taliban" is such a terrible, horrible phrase!!!

Warning: This post contains irreverent humour. Some people claim to like it. They even think they write it.

Oh dear! What a nasty, nasty man Vince Cable is! He used the phrase "Capital Taliban". 'He what, Mikey?!?!' Voice, he was talking about the Bank of England demanding that banks hold lots of capital. 'Right. Sounds really interesting.' Yeah. And then he used that shocking phrase that has shocked everyone. 'Well, I'm shocked. This is the first I've heard of it, man, but I'm definitely shocked. What a horrible world we live in! How can a phrase like that ever be acceptable?' It can't ever be acceptable, Voice. It's really, really terrible. 'Horrible!' I can't believe it! What was Vince thinking of?! 'Doesn't he have a focus group that can put politically-correct words into his mouth, so that soft ponces like us don't get upset?' No, I don't think so. It's all free speech with this one. 'Shocking! Maybe Vince should hire some absurd, humourless journalists to help him with his vocabulary.' That's an idea! Do you have anyone in mind? 'Yeah.' So do I.

...

And I don't even like Vince Cable, so I don't know why I'm defending him. 'Maybe it's because there are other people you like even less, Mikey.' Do you have anyone in mind, Voice?

Oh, he's gone.

...

And in other news ... Stevie Cohen's SAC Capital Advisors might go out of business if it has to face criminal charges. Will Stevie care? Won't he just start another firm? / Not much of a story, really, is it? But I suppose you can say that about all the financial news.

Is it lunchtime yet?

...

My fingers are getting better, I think. Well, they better be getting better. I haven't played the guitar for over two weeks. / I'm so close to a breakthrough. It's very frustrating, man. / You know I love you, dear reader(s), but I've got to get away ... to another life. / 'It will seem like a nightmare, boss.' Oh, you're back. What will? 'The last six years or so. Just wait until you're living in your house in Malibu.' / Dreaming ...

Wednesday, 24 July 2013

[No. 136] Waiting ...

Just waiting ...

And I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[1], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[1], and I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[2], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[1], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[2], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[1], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[2], and here I am, a-ROUND[1], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[2], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[1], and here I am, a-ROUND[2], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![1], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[2], and the old world is sickening[1], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![2], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[1], and the old world is sickening[2], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[1], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[2], and this is ... just ...[1], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[2], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[1], and this is ... just ...[2], and I'm looking into the BLUE[1], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[2], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[1], and I'm looking into the BLUE[2], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[1], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[2], and NOTHING changes ...[1], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[2], and I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[3], and NOTHING changes ...[2], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[3], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[3], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[3], and here I am, a-ROUND[3], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[3], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![3], and the old world is sickening[3], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[3], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[3], and this is ... just ...[3], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[3], and I'm looking into the BLUE[3], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[3], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[3], and NOTHING changes ...[3], and

And I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[1], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[1], and I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[2], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[1], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[2], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[1], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[2], and here I am, a-ROUND[1], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[2], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[1], and here I am, a-ROUND[2], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![1], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[2], and the old world is sickening[1], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![2], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[1], and the old world is sickening[2], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[1], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[2], and this is ... just ...[1], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[2], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[1], and this is ... just ...[2], and I'm looking into the BLUE[1], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[2], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[1], and I'm looking into the BLUE[2], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[1], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[2], and NOTHING changes ...[1], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[2], and I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[3], and NOTHING changes ...[2], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[3], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[3], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[3], and here I am, a-ROUND[3], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[3], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![3], and the old world is sickening[3], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[3], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[3], and this is ... just ...[3], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[3], and I'm looking into the BLUE[3], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[3], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[3], and NOTHING changes ...[3], and

And I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[1], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[1], and I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[2], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[1], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[2], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[1], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[2], and here I am, a-ROUND[1], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[2], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[1], and here I am, a-ROUND[2], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![1], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[2], and the old world is sickening[1], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![2], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[1], and the old world is sickening[2], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[1], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[2], and this is ... just ...[1], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[2], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[1], and this is ... just ...[2], and I'm looking into the BLUE[1], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[2], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[1], and I'm looking into the BLUE[2], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[1], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[2], and NOTHING changes ...[1], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[2], and I'm waiting for some kind of release from the hell of everyday existence[3], and NOTHING changes ...[2], and will it come to me, out of the blue?[3], and when I'm on one, I want the two, and when I'm on two, I want the three - and then more than THREE[3], and how long will it take for a perfect freedom to find me / where I am?[3], and here I am, a-ROUND[3], and have I got the energy / to go looking? ...[3], and I'm waiting for the ... one fine morning when I'll wake up to a NEW WORLD![3], and the old world is sickening[3], and I haven't got the energy to ... go faster a-ROUND, beyond, past ... I'm stuck at this point[3], and this will last FOREVER - is it a good thing?[3], and this is ... just ...[3], and let me fix a WORD, or two, any WORD, or two, and let me not slip away with no words at all[3], and I'm looking into the BLUE[3], and I'm waiting for SOMETHING ... to come to me, out of the BLUE[3], and I'm making the WORD BLUE a word to concentrate on, to get better with[3], and NOTHING changes ...[3], and

Who the hell is Euan Munro?

Let me tell you, dear, lovely reader(s). He's yet another chief executive of Aviva Investors. 'Oh God! John Misselbrook didn't last long, did he, man?' Well, Euan isn't taking over until January next year, so John still has a chance to make an impression. 'What's the point, Mikey? If I were John, I'd just be pissing about now. I wouldn't bother doing any work.' Yeah, that's you all over, isn't it, Voice? John, Mr Misselbrook, is a fucking professional! 'All right, don't get upset.' Fucking useless intern, you are. Where's all the research on this story you were supposed to do? 'You don't pay me, man.' And? You're an intern. Interns are rotten, miserable slaves! They don't deserve any fucking money.

[Sorry, reader(s). / It's this cubital arm stuff that's getting me down, making me bad-tempered. / I want to play my guitar. I've got songs to write. I mean, I'm not going to get my dream home in Malibu by writing this blog, am I?]

I want research!!! / 'You want research, Mikey? Here's some research.' - Euan Munro said, "I'm in heaven when you smile, and I am joining Aviva because I see a clear opportunity to unlock the potential of Aviva Investors, a well established business with impressive scale and significant investment talent. Aviva Investors' proven investment capability means that it is well placed to meet the growing demands from the institutional market for income with low volatility."

Yeah, right. He's not Jackie Wilson, Voice! 'I know, man. I couldn't resist the first bit.' Thanks, anyway. At least it makes Euan seem a bit more colourful.

[Malibu or Beverly Hills. I haven't decided yet. 'You leaving the country?!' I might, Voice. I'll be like Dudley Moore in "10".]

[Better than Harry H. Corbett in ...]

Tuesday, 23 July 2013

Michael Coscia fined £600,000 by the FCA

Yeah, Michael Coscia, whoever he is. And the FCA, whatever that is. Er ... well. / 'Mikey, the FCA is the new regulator, the Financial Conduct Authority.' Oh, I forgot. Do we still have regulators? Yes, I suppose we do, the FCA. Ha! One dead shark learns to accept death, and then another takes its place. 'This shark is very much alive.' For now, Voice. 'Oh, the shark, babe, has such teeth, dear. And it shows them pearly white.' Shut up, you idiot!

Tracey McDermott is back in town(!!!): "Mr Coscia was cheating the market and other participants. High Frequency Trading and the use of algorithms are an important and commonplace part of the markets nowadays but in this case these techniques were deliberately designed to abuse the market, undermining its integrity. This is unacceptable, which is why we have taken tough action to punish Coscia and deprive him of any benefit he acquired." More, than is healthy.

And now McDermott spends just like a sailor, could it be our girl's done something rash? 'Oh, it's all right for you to quote lyrics, boss.' This is my blog, Voice. Get your own blog!

_________________________


McDermott the Knife? Never mind. I should be writing my own lyrics, not messing around with Brecht's. / I'm starting to get a bit of feeling back into my fingers. I still can't hold the guitar properly though. I'm hoping everything will be all right. / I might get some vitamin B6 today. (Good for repairing nerves.) It'll probably help more than pineapples and bananas.

Monday, 22 July 2013

Allwright and Frost have left RWC Partners!!!

Oh, I don't like this! I don't like it one little bit. Peter Allwright and Stuart Frost left months ago, months! And we're only finding out about it now. Does that sound right to you, dear reader(s)? / 'Mikey, you know what this is, man.' What? 'Mike Corcell.' Maybe. 'The crazy bastard has eaten them.' Let's not jump to conclusions, Voice. There's a rumour Pete Allwright has gone back to working for Nomura. 'Really? What about poor Stu?' No one knows what's happened to him. I've been on the phone all morning. Apparently, he's disappeared off the face of the earth. 'And that doesn't set alarm bells ringing in your head?' Well ... 'I tell you, Mikey, that Corcell lunatic has eaten him!' Oh come on! We don't know that yet.

Jesus H. Christ and the Mary Chain! I hope they're all right. Both of them. / They were managing the RWC Cautious Absolute Rate and Currency fund. David(e) Basile has taken control of it now. 'Does he have protection, boss?' I don't know. As long as Mike is in his cage, I suppose ... I don't know. 'This is fucked up, man!' Yeah, and there seems to be some confusion with Basile's first name. People don't know if he's "David" or "Davide". And Corcell will only take advantage of the confusion. While everyone is worrying about what to call Basile, Mike will be biting lumps out of him. 'I've seen a picture of David-e. His face, it's too soft. He doesn't look like he'll be able to fight off an attack.' I fear you may be right, Voice.

...

Oh, it's too early in the week for this dark shit. / And I've got problems of my own, anyway. I think I might have cubital tunnel syndrome, rather than carpal tunnel syndrome. But I'm dealing with it. I'm drinking water, eating pineapples and bananas, and wrapping my arm in a towel at night. 'If all that doesn't work, what will?' I'm not having surgery. I'm going to beat this the natural way, and then get back on the guitar.

Thursday, 18 July 2013

[No. 135] Finance ain't a dream, son, it's a nightmare

Are you trapped in it?

And ... when is it going to rain?[1], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[1], and ... when is it going to rain?[2], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[1], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[2], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[1], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[2], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[1], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[2], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[1], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[2], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[1], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[2], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[1], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[2], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[1], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[2], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[1], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[2], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[1], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[2], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[1], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[2], and I can't even DREAM about money now[1], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[2], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[1], and I can't even DREAM about money now[2], and ... oh ...[1], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[2], and ... when is it going to rain?[3], and ... oh ...[2], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[3], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[3], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[3], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[3], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[3], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[3], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[3], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[3], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[3], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[3], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[3], and I can't even DREAM about money now[3], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[3], and ... oh ...[3], and

And ... when is it going to rain?[1], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[1], and ... when is it going to rain?[2], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[1], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[2], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[1], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[2], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[1], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[2], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[1], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[2], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[1], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[2], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[1], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[2], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[1], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[2], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[1], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[2], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[1], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[2], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[1], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[2], and I can't even DREAM about money now[1], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[2], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[1], and I can't even DREAM about money now[2], and ... oh ...[1], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[2], and ... when is it going to rain?[3], and ... oh ...[2], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[3], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[3], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[3], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[3], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[3], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[3], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[3], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[3], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[3], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[3], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[3], and I can't even DREAM about money now[3], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[3], and ... oh ...[3], and

And ... when is it going to rain?[1], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[1], and ... when is it going to rain?[2], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[1], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[2], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[1], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[2], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[1], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[2], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[1], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[2], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[1], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[2], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[1], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[2], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[1], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[2], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[1], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[2], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[1], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[2], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[1], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[2], and I can't even DREAM about money now[1], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[2], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[1], and I can't even DREAM about money now[2], and ... oh ...[1], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[2], and ... when is it going to rain?[3], and ... oh ...[2], and this hot weather makes it worse, and you can't think, and you don't want to think, and ICE cold water all a-ROUND is what you're crying out for[3], and you could jump in cloud to river to sea to cloud, again and again ... and again[3], and the sky is blue, and the office is grey[3], and if a seagull swooped down and gave you some mint ice cream, beak to mouth?[3], and ... are you lost in MONEY?[3], and I could give you some pineapple chunks, straight out of the fridge[3], and if you think you've got problems, man, I can't play my guitar with numb fingers[3], and it's too HOT(!!!) for the guitar, anyway[3], and I'll catch a seagull, stuff its beak with mint ice cream, and you can KISS the seagull[3], and I'm making even less sense in this heat[3], and I'm stuck sweaty sticky a-ROUND like a monkey in a barrel of jam - and you?[3], and I can't even DREAM about money now[3], and I could drink an ocean of Top Deck shandy if I were back in the Seventies with the kite and the moon[3], and ... oh ...[3], and

Liam Spillane has joined Aviva Investors

Yes, Liam - "Mickey", to his friends, and his enemies, and the cops, and the dames - has got himself a job at Aviva Investors. 'What's he doing, Mikey?' Man, Mickey is working as some sort of emerging market debt currency portfolio manager. 'Oh. Sounds exciting, man.' Does it?! 'Well ...' I'm sure Mickey would rather be a hard-boiled detective, plugging someone with his .45. 'Yeah, but we can't all have the lives we want, boss. Mickey has done the right thing going to Aviva Investors.' I don't know, Voice. I think people should push themselves to live the dream. You only get one life, you know. 'Daniel James is happy.' Who gives a shit about Daniel James?! We're talking about a man's life here, his dreams. Mickey doesn't want to work in finance. I mean, why doesn't he use his real name, Liam? Think about it, Voice. 'So what do you suggest?' I could put a spell on him. 'Yeah?' Why not? I could get him to behave like the private dick he really wants to be. Aviva would soon sack him. Then he'd be free to fulfil his destiny! 'I'm not sure, Mikey.' Well ...

I suppose "Liam" won't thank me for interfering. I'll think about it for a few days. / You never know, dear reader(s), Mickey might decide for himself that it's time to become a real man.

_________________________


Lunch? What do you think? Cheese sandwich. It's always cheese, or egg. I'm not a very imaginative vegetarian. So what? I like what I like. Tomorrow, I'll be having a big ploughman's sandwich in the pub down by the river. But that's another story ...

After lunch? It's got to be No. 135. 'Boss, you could write No. 136, just to freak everyone out.' No, that would be cruel.

Wednesday, 17 July 2013

[No. 134] Seagull got my ice cream

Mint.

And I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[1], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[1], and I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[2], and it was in my HAND!!![1], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[2], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[1], and it was in my HAND!!![2], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[1], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[2], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[1], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[2], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[1], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[2], and the sun ...[1], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[2], and the seagull got away[1], and the sun ...[2], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[1], and the seagull got away[2], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[1], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[2], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[1], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[2], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[1], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[2], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[1], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[2], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[1], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[2], and I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[3], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[2], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[3], and it was in my HAND!!![3], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[3], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[3], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[3], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[3], and the sun ...[3], and the seagull got away[3], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[3], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[3], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[3], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[3], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[3], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[3], and

And I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[1], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[1], and I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[2], and it was in my HAND!!![1], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[2], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[1], and it was in my HAND!!![2], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[1], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[2], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[1], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[2], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[1], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[2], and the sun ...[1], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[2], and the seagull got away[1], and the sun ...[2], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[1], and the seagull got away[2], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[1], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[2], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[1], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[2], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[1], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[2], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[1], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[2], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[1], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[2], and I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[3], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[2], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[3], and it was in my HAND!!![3], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[3], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[3], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[3], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[3], and the sun ...[3], and the seagull got away[3], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[3], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[3], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[3], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[3], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[3], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[3], and

And I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[1], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[1], and I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[2], and it was in my HAND!!![1], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[2], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[1], and it was in my HAND!!![2], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[1], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[2], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[1], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[2], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[1], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[2], and the sun ...[1], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[2], and the seagull got away[1], and the sun ...[2], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[1], and the seagull got away[2], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[1], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[2], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[1], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[2], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[1], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[2], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[1], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[2], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[1], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[2], and I didn't even leave my ice cream out in the rain in the park: I wasn't in a park[3], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[2], and ... no, it wasn't a Richard Harris situation[3], and it was in my HAND!!![3], and it was SUNNY, and it wasn't raining, and the seagull just snatched it out of my hand, man[3], and I was left standing in the street, looking right into the BLUE SKY - with everyone staring at the empty cone[3], and remember No. 99 ... my body is the cone, and my soul is the ice cream[3], and I got all the BLUE in my EYE[3], and the sun ...[3], and the seagull got away[3], and so ... I went to The Sloop Inn for a lager[3], and I'm living through it all again, a-ROUND here, because I like to hold on to moments in time[3], and if I could get my hands on that seagull ... I wouldn't hurt it, everyone's got to eat[3], and I used to give these characters CHIPS(!!!)[3], and I'll go back, and I'll go back, and I'll go back ... one day[3], and ... IMMORTAL seagull, IMMORTAL mint ice cream ... oh, to live forever[3], and

Tushar Morzaria is going to Barclays as the bank's new finance director

And that's about as exciting as it gets in the middle of summer. Christ! Personally, I'd like to know why I fucking bother. 'You have to bother, Mikey. You know the situation.' Yes, Voice, I know the situation. I'm lost in finance. It's a tragedy. 'That's life. That's what all the people say. You're riding high in -' Shut up, man. My miserable life? People will write about it one day. 'Someone will make a movie for sure.' Unless I can engineer my escape! 'With your dodgy hand? What are the odds? Are you back on the guitar yet, boss?' No. / Let's concentrate on Tushar Morzaria. He's a big cheese at JP Morgan Chase, apparently. 'Never heard of him.' Now he's going to be a big cheese at Barclays. And the bank will be paying him a fortune. 'How much?' £800,000 plus bonus and that, share crap. He might make over £6 million a year. 'You could make more than that if you pulled your finger out.' My finger is the problem, Voice. It's all numb.

...

Jesus H. Christ! I can't even pretend to be square enough to write this financial news nonsense, baby - not with the weather the way it is. I'm just going to listen to Sinatra and make plans for my next conceptual. 'No. 134?' What do you think, man?! Of course No. 134. This afternoon. I might write about the seagull that stole my ice cream. 'You're still upset about that, aren't you?' Fuckin' A I'm still upset! You don't mess with a man's mint ice cream. Not in this weather.

Yeah, Frank. / Sinatra had a proper life. Hanging out in Vegas with the boys. Chasing the dames. That's a life. / This ain't a life. And I'm including you, dear reader(s). You ain't shit compared to Mr Sinatra.

Tuesday, 16 July 2013

John Kay has gone nutmeg crazy!!!

It's bad enough that John writes for some square bullshit newspaper, but he's also investing in nutmeg now. The guy has completely lost it! 'Are you sure, Mikey?' Well, check this, Voice: The nutmeg tree is any of several species of trees in genus Myristica. The most important commercial species is Myristica fragrans, an evergreen tree indigenous to the Banda Islands in the Moluccas (or Spice Islands) of Indonesia. The nutmeg tree is important for two spices derived from the fruit: nutmeg and mace. Nutmeg is the seed of the tree, roughly egg-shaped and about 20 to 30 mm (0.8 to 1.2 in) long and 15 to 18 mm (0.6 to 0.7 in) wide, and weighing between 5 and 10 g (0.2 and 0.4 oz) dried, while mace is the dried "lacy" reddish covering or aril of the seed. The first harvest of nutmeg trees takes place 7–9 years after planting, and the trees reach full production after 20 years. Nutmeg is usually used in powdered form. This is the only tropical fruit that is the source of two different spices. Several other commercial products are also produced from the trees, including essential oils, extracted oleoresins, and nutmeg butter. MORE. / 'Christ! It sounds serious, man.' Serious as a heart attack, Voice. What is John thinking of?!

Well, let's forget about this weirdo. You never know what characters like John are going to do next. 'You can't blame him, boss. It's the company he keeps.' Maybe. / Listen, John, sort yourself out, mate, yeah? It isn't the nutmeg so much ...

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I'm getting into bananas in a big way. Not investing in them, eating them. I've read they might make my hand better. It's yet another setback I don't need, man. Maybe I should buy a keyboard anyway. I've seen a nice Yamaha one.

I haven't played the piano for over twenty years, but it's easier than the guitar, I think. Certainly less strain on your fingers.

Simon Cowell reckons Mack the Knife is the greatest song ever written. I've been listening to Bobby Darin's classic version of it quite a bit lately. / Look for it on YouTube, reader, if you're interested. I can't do everything for you.

It’s cool that Bertolt Brecht wrote the lyrics. / So, you can mix high culture with popular culture ...

Monday, 15 July 2013

Why has Leigh Himsworth been sold to City Financial?

No one told me. I thought Leigh was still at Eden Financial with his CF Eden UK Select Opportunities fund. / 'Eden sold him, Mikey. Slavery in this day and age.' I know, Voice. It's absolutely shocking. / What do we know about City Financial? 'Well, man, they're independent, I can tell you that. They're not owned by a bank. They're not owned by an insurance company. They've deliberately designed a nimble company to bring to advisers and investors a straightforward series of funds managed by characters who they reckon are masters of reality.' Incredible.

Of course, City Financial have got it wrong. I'm the only master of reality in the financial world. I could accept "masters of their craft", but - 'They're so arrogant, boss. Maybe you should teach them a lesson.' I might have to. I think I should give them a bit of time to change their ways though. 'Yeah.' / They better give Leigh a salary. 'And luncheon vouchers!' Yes, and luncheon vouchers.

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Lunch? Oh, luxury egg sandwich, luxury strawberry yoghurt. And I might have some pieces of pineapple after my dinner tonight.

...

I'm getting sick of the personal stuff. However, I've got to tell you about my holiday in St Ives. / I only stayed three nights. I couldn't find a reasonably-priced room. And I sprained my ankle, so I couldn't walk around the cliffs. And some bastard of a seagull stole my mint ice cream and left me with just the cone. (There was a headline in the local paper: Seagulls lured to their deaths.) / But I had a great time. The weather was perfect. / I'll go back one day, for months, or forever - after my ship has come in, obviously.


Update (9.00pm): I've decided that My Funny Valentine is the greatest song ever written. And I think Sinatra's version is the best. / I've damaged my hand. (I'm hoping it's not carpal tunnel syndrome.) So my guitar playing is fucked at the moment. I don't want to write songs on the piano. (Although I will if I have to.) Never mind, eh?