Thursday, 27 February 2014

[No. 198] A fresh start for Kirill Pyshkin at Mirabaud - (?)

A happy ending. (?) I don't know. You never know.

And after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[1], and I can't wait for this new fund![1], and after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[2], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[1], and I can't wait for this new fund![2], and Kirill will always be welcome[1], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[2], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[1], and Kirill will always be welcome[2], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![1], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[2], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![1], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![2], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![1], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![2], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![1], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![2], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[1], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![2], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[1], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[2], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[1], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[2], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[1], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[2], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[1], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[2], and after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[3], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[2], and I can't wait for this new fund![3], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[3], and Kirill will always be welcome[3], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[3], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![3], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![3], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![3], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![3], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[3], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[3], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[3], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[3], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[3], and

And after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[1], and I can't wait for this new fund![1], and after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[2], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[1], and I can't wait for this new fund![2], and Kirill will always be welcome[1], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[2], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[1], and Kirill will always be welcome[2], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![1], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[2], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![1], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![2], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![1], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![2], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![1], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![2], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[1], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![2], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[1], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[2], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[1], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[2], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[1], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[2], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[1], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[2], and after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[3], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[2], and I can't wait for this new fund![3], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[3], and Kirill will always be welcome[3], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[3], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![3], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![3], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![3], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![3], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[3], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[3], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[3], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[3], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[3], and

And after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[1], and I can't wait for this new fund![1], and after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[2], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[1], and I can't wait for this new fund![2], and Kirill will always be welcome[1], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[2], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[1], and Kirill will always be welcome[2], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![1], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[2], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![1], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![2], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![1], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![2], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![1], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![2], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[1], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![2], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[1], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[2], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[1], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[2], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[1], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[2], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[1], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[2], and after the holiday camp, it's going to be tough, but I reckon Kirill is man enough[3], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[2], and I can't wait for this new fund![3], and the thing is, if he needs to relax, chill out, chillax ... he can come here and get a-ROUND out of his head[3], and Kirill will always be welcome[3], and I know how hard it is, the bum's life / we all need something to do with our lives / we can't be idle, can we?[3], and thank the LORD ... it's winter![3], and when summer gets here ... oh, draw the curtains, Kirill! / You won't want that sunshine, man![3], and / NO SUNSHINE!!![3], and I remember ... Selsey / the ice creams, the Top Deck shandies, the Space Dust ... ah, happy days![3], and this Kirill, he's a grown man now ... no time for messing about like a little kid[3], and / he shouldn't have left AVIVA INVESTORS[3], and just like Sinatra, Kirill has got to have a few regrets - but are they too few to mention?[3], and / so ... a-ROUND here, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... all DIZZY, yeah?[3], and I've said it before / Oh, let me say it again: Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world[3], and

Who on earth is Kirill Pyshkin?!

Well, well ... well. / Who would have thought it, eh? There is such a man! His name is Kirill Pyshkin. But I won't let it get me down. / Kirill used to "work" at Aviva Investors. 'Ha!' That should set alarms bells ringing. I mean, who has ever worked at Aviva Investors?

Kirill has. Five years. You don't believe me? See if you can dig this: I was a senior fund manager at Aviva Investors - for my sins - in charge of global equity income strategy, including the flagship retail equity fund for Aviva Ireland - Global High Yield Equity. I also managed a number of other specialist equity funds including SRI, thematic global equity, global technology, global brands, concentrated 20 stock portfolio, Asia and Japan funds. I was personally responsible for AUM in excess of £1 billion. Yeah, me! I did the work, man. / Thank you, Kirill. I believe you. Well, I want to believe ...

There is a happy ending though, dear reader(s). Kirill is now a senior fund manager at Mirabaud Asset Management. It's a bit of a shock to the system, Mikey, because they want me to launch a new global equity income fund. / Oh yeah. Real work. No more walks in the park. No more ice creams. No more Lego. 'That's Cantab!' Oh, Cantab, yeah, sorry.

Never heard of Mirabaud before, but being a "pure player" without any proprietary activities, their mission is exclusively geared towards providing their investors with the best and most suitable investment solutions. / Great! A pure player! That's what I like to see.

...

After lunch, I'll be taking a deeper look ... into the night. I'll get Kirill a-ROUND with this Mirabaud firm. There'll be mystery, too - if I can manage it.

I'll be doing it my way, of course. No horrible facts to bring us down, yeah? Just a-ROUND and out of it!

Wednesday, 26 February 2014

[No. 197] Something pure in a dirty world

No chance - ?

And / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[1], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[1], and / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[2], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[1], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[2], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![1], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[2], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[1], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![2], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[1], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[2], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[1], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[2], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[1], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[2], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[1], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[2], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[1], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[2], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[1], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[2], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[1], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[2], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[1], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[2], and so ... here I am / again, ha![1], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[2], and / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[3], and so ... here I am / again, ha![2], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[3], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[3], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![3], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[3], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[3], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[3], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[3], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[3], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[3], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[3], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[3], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[3], and so ... here I am / again, ha![3], and

And / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[1], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[1], and / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[2], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[1], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[2], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![1], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[2], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[1], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![2], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[1], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[2], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[1], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[2], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[1], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[2], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[1], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[2], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[1], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[2], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[1], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[2], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[1], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[2], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[1], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[2], and so ... here I am / again, ha![1], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[2], and / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[3], and so ... here I am / again, ha![2], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[3], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[3], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![3], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[3], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[3], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[3], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[3], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[3], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[3], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[3], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[3], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[3], and so ... here I am / again, ha![3], and

And / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[1], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[1], and / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[2], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[1], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[2], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![1], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[2], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[1], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![2], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[1], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[2], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[1], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[2], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[1], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[2], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[1], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[2], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[1], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[2], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[1], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[2], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[1], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[2], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[1], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[2], and so ... here I am / again, ha![1], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[2], and / I'm trying to get my hands on it - and my mind on it / and my soul with it[3], and so ... here I am / again, ha![2], and / BUT THE SHIT keeps getting in my way[3], and what do rats know ... of PERFECTION?[3], and in the sewer there are so many things that sicken me / and I'm looking for the EXIT!!![3], and I'd love to be one of the LIVING DEAD ... who don't even try for something better, so pure[3], and I ... look at what I've got / and I want more[3], and I'm crying my eyes out / and my hands are stretched out / and my fingers, man, are reaching ...[3], and I'll get rid of ... emotions that drag me down, down, down ... one day(!) ... I'm dreaming, obviously[3], and it's crawling a-ROUND here ... my soul, my heart, my mind ... my dreams, my nightmares[3], and it doesn't get any better if I go on, and off ... forever[3], and outside is a HELL(!) ... I won't even get involved with ... sunny day or rainy day[3], and there's a white cloud / oh, top of my window / that's a real white, far away ...[3], and / for me, it's ... filth on the moon, at night / or one of those moony mornings[3], and so ... here I am / again, ha![3], and

Henry Kravis and George Roberts have done it again!

My God! I can't believe it! The Kohlberg Kravis Roberts boys. They've done it again! 'What have they done, Mikey?' Made loads of money, son. Do you remember last year? I reported - yeah, me - that they had made over $135 million each the year before. 'Which year was that? I'm getting confused.' The year before, man. / Anyway, this year, now, I can report that they made just as many millions ... er, last year. '2013?' Yeah. Well, more. Over $160 million each! 'Brilliant! And how much are they sending you?' Eh? 'How much are you getting, boss?' Nothing. 'But I thought -' I don't want to talk about it, Voice. Let's just be happy for Henry and George, yeah?

I'm very happy for them. / They are pretty mean, though, because I only wanted £5 million, and I didn't get a penny, did I? 'Maybe you'll have more luck this year.' I don't want to discuss it, Voice! Are you thick or something? / But I'm wondering ... How much money do they actually need? If they were to send me a mere £1 million, would they miss it? Of course they wouldn't! They probably spend that much on new shoes each month. 'New shoes?!' Well ... and a haircut. 'Yeah, it all adds up.' I can't afford to go to the barber's every month. And I can't remember the last time I bought a new pair of shoes. 'You got those trainers the other week.' Trainers are different. Henry and George have thousands of pairs of trainers. 'How do you know?' I'm guessing, man. They want to stay fit, don't they? I imagine they go jogging with a new pair every morning, before work.

Not that I care what they do. I have my own life, and a bit of money. I'm not starving. I don't need Henry and George. However, I'm sure they would feel better about themselves if they shared their good fortune with me. 'They worked for it, boss. They didn't win the lottery.' Oh, sure, man. Yeah. Ha! Did they work for it? Really? Come on. Don't be so naive. Guys like that are set up for wealth from the moment they're born. 'You're talking like a commie, Mikey!' Shut it! Go away! / I'll phone Henry later, dear reader(s), after lunch. I'll make him understand ...

Tuesday, 25 February 2014

Carl Vine has his own hedge fund, Port Meadow

You've got to take your hat off to Carl Vine. The man has rebuilt his life since leaving the London office of SAC Capital Advisors. He's in Oxford now with Port Meadow, which is (or will launch) an Asia-focused equity long/short hedge fund. I don't know how they work these things. It's not my area. Dymon Asia Capital is involved, too. / The only question - in my mind - is, why does Carl want to focus on Asia in Oxford? Shouldn't he be somewhere in Asia if he wants to do that? 'Mikey, cut him some slack, man. He used to be in Hong Kong with SAC before moving to London. Carl probably knows what he's doing.' All right, Voice. I suppose "probably" is good enough these days. What a world we're living in, eh, dear reader(s)?!

...

At this moment? Oh, I'm listening to the Pink Floyd song Wish You Were Here on repeat, a-ROUND and a-ROUND, yeah? / The thing is, I spent four hours yesterday trying to record You're Lying and just couldn't get it right. Then in the evening I listened to the Pink Floyd song a few times, and then - without recording - managed to play my own song properly with some feeling. Pink Floyd put me in the right mood, you dig? / So, I might try again later.

...

I'm pissed off with the weather people, man. It was lovely yesterday morning, and I was thinking about going to Eastbourne for a day and night - you know, the way I went to Poole in December. Well, the weather report said there would be heavy rain later on in the day (and night). I thought: "Oh no, I don't want to get trapped down there in a massive storm." Anyway, guess what. No storm, no heavy rain, no bloody rain at all.

Actually, it's starting to rain a bit now. But I'd be coming back to day, wouldn't I?

...

Have you heard the latest? The Conservative party is rebranding itself as the Workers' party. 'Ha!' That will certainly bring the votes in! NOT! / Yeah, all the people on minimum wage, all the Workfare slaves, they'll absolutely love it.

Seriously though, no normal person is going to vote (again) for a bunch of corrupt Old Etonian aristocrats unless he or she is a complete fucking mug. / When's the election, man?

Monday, 24 February 2014

Daniel Loeb says yoga makes him a better investor

You know Dan Loeb, don't you? He's the founder and chief executive of that hedge fund, Third Point. Well, he's just come back from India where he spent some time with the Maharishi, Donovan, and Mike Love from The Beach Boys. (Ringo was there too for a while, but he ran out of baked beans and went home.) Apparently, they turned him on to the benefits of yoga. / Here's what Danny boy says (to everyone, he won't shut up) on the subject: "Oi, you! Yes, you. How often, man, do you get bad vibrations from your investing activities? I'm talking morals, not just money, you dig? Don't you feel sick sometimes, in your heart and your soul? Maybe your head. Well, you ain't spiritual enough, son. Contemplation, and meditation - it ain't just for penniless monks and hermits, you know, those morons! Deadbeats! Yoga. Anyone can do it. It's yoga you need. This is something I've been discussing with Mike Love. You see, yoga quiets the fluctuations in the mind. It puts the mind at ease, yeah? Yoga teaches us shit about the choices we make. It teaches us not to harm God's creatures when we're investing. Mice and that. And it makes us more creative, like Shakespeare. Incredible! Now that I'm back from India, I just know I'll make even more money, but I'll do it with a calmness I've never had before. And the bonus? No one will think I'm a bad or greedy person no more."

...

Wonderful, eh? 'Ha!' Well, well ... It's a bit 2008 though, isn't it? I'm surprised he didn't mention the astral plane. Where was Danny when I was touching the financial world with my blood and fire? / Obviously, I wish him the best of luck, but it's all ... dead for me, that life. I only care about my music now. I can't believe Danny spent a whole month in the company of Mike Love, Donovan, and Ringo (for a week or so) and didn't come back with the music bug.

Thursday, 20 February 2014

[No. 196] David Tawil and Steven Azarbad ... up, up and away in their beautiful hedge fund!

Would you like to fly away with them?

And Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![1], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[1], and Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![2], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[1], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[2], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[1], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[2], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[1], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[2], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[1], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[2], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[1], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[2], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[1], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[2], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[1], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[2], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[1], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[2], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[1], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[2], and ... I know what you like, ha![1], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[2], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[1], and ... I know what you like, ha![2], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[1], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[2], and / ask yourself: will it last?[1], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[2], and Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![3], and / ask yourself: will it last?[2], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[3], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[3], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[3], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[3], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[3], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[3], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[3], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[3], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[3], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[3], and ... I know what you like, ha![3], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[3], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[3], and / ask yourself: will it last?[3], and

And Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![1], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[1], and Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![2], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[1], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[2], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[1], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[2], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[1], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[2], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[1], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[2], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[1], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[2], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[1], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[2], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[1], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[2], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[1], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[2], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[1], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[2], and ... I know what you like, ha![1], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[2], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[1], and ... I know what you like, ha![2], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[1], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[2], and / ask yourself: will it last?[1], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[2], and Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![3], and / ask yourself: will it last?[2], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[3], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[3], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[3], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[3], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[3], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[3], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[3], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[3], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[3], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[3], and ... I know what you like, ha![3], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[3], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[3], and / ask yourself: will it last?[3], and

And Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![1], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[1], and Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![2], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[1], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[2], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[1], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[2], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[1], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[2], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[1], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[2], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[1], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[2], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[1], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[2], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[1], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[2], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[1], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[2], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[1], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[2], and ... I know what you like, ha![1], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[2], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[1], and ... I know what you like, ha![2], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[1], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[2], and / ask yourself: will it last?[1], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[2], and Maglan Capital is floating among the stars ... and the world is wearing a nicer face because of that FACT![3], and / ask yourself: will it last?[2], and I'm so ooo jealous / stuck a-ROUND here[3], and Davy and Stevie want to know / would YOU(!) like to ride in their beautiful hedge fund?[3], and these guys, they got twilight canopy, the works[3], and love is waiting there / 'Where, for fuck's sake?!' / in their beautiful hedge fund, man[3], and if by chance you find yourself loving them ... no one is going to blame you[3], and these guys, they keep the moon beside them / in the silver sky, by all accounts[3], and Credit Suisse seems such a long time ago now / and, well, such a long way ... away[3], and a-ROUND here ... oh, how can I compete?[3], and Davy and Stevie, they'll find a cloud to hide you / I'm pretty sure of that[3], and / if you hold their hands, you can, er, chase your dream across the sky[3], and ... I know what you like, ha![3], and I'll tell you now ... I'm still going after all that "Beyond the THREE!" shit / because it's all I know[3], and if YOU(!) want to fly off with the Maglan freaks, I can only wish you the best of luck[3], and / ask yourself: will it last?[3], and

How has Maglan Capital gone up 59 per cent?!

I don't believe it! All other hedge funds have gone down, down, down. But Maglan Capital has gone up, up, up. 59 per cent last year! 4 per cent this January! Does that sound right to you, dear reader(s)? David Tawil and Steven Azarbad are the guys behind it, ex-Credit Suisse. I just can't understand it. Are they great immortal geniuses or something? What's going on, man?!

Maybe it's the name of the firm, Maglan. / Do you know what "Maglan" means? No? I'll tell you. Maglan was some bird in the Bible known for her long, down-curved bill, which she used strategically to probe beneath the ground for food. (Strange girl!) She was legendary for her bravery and vitality during harsh weather. Unlike that wimp Dylan, she didn't care about taking shelter from the storm. Also, she was a member of a small, elite special forces unit, specializing in operating behind enemy lines using ... her bill, I suppose. Maglan's missions were kept secret, due to the usual bullshit surrounding such stuff. / So, Davy and Stevie have named their firm after her. Okay. Doesn't really explain anything, does it?

Maybe it's the death of experience. I don't know.

...

Well, well ... / I, er ... / I'm going to forget all about it until after lunch. Then I'll take another look. I'll try to solve the mystery - or add to it.

Oh, in other news, twenty-seven bishops have just attacked David Cameron. ('What with, Mikey?') Brilliant! This is what men of God should be doing. It's what Jesus would be doing if he were alive. Conservatives are the new Romans, man. / Now I just want the Pope to come out and say that all Catholic Conservative voters will be excommunicated. 'What?!' This is a fight between the forces of good and evil, man!!!

[By the way, I've always had a soft spot for Julius Caesar, but he was a pretty immoral guy.]

Wednesday, 19 February 2014

[No. 195] I want to be clean!

No more filth!

And there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![1], and where's that fucking rainbow?![1], and there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![2], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[1], and where's that fucking rainbow?![2], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![1], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[2], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[1], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![2], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[1], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[2], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[1], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[2], and these words aren't helping, man[1], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[2], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![1], and these words aren't helping, man[2], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[1], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![2], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[1], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[2], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[1], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[2], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![1], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[2], and there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![3], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![2], and where's that fucking rainbow?![3], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[3], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![3], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[3], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[3], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[3], and these words aren't helping, man[3], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![3], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[3], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[3], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[3], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![3], and

And there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![1], and where's that fucking rainbow?![1], and there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![2], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[1], and where's that fucking rainbow?![2], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![1], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[2], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[1], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![2], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[1], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[2], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[1], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[2], and these words aren't helping, man[1], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[2], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![1], and these words aren't helping, man[2], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[1], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![2], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[1], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[2], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[1], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[2], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![1], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[2], and there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![3], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![2], and where's that fucking rainbow?![3], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[3], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![3], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[3], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[3], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[3], and these words aren't helping, man[3], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![3], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[3], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[3], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[3], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![3], and

And there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![1], and where's that fucking rainbow?![1], and there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![2], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[1], and where's that fucking rainbow?![2], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![1], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[2], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[1], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![2], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[1], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[2], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[1], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[2], and these words aren't helping, man[1], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[2], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![1], and these words aren't helping, man[2], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[1], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![2], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[1], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[2], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[1], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[2], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![1], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[2], and there's a way, and there's a place, and BELIEVE ME / There is a state of mind / away from here ... over there![3], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![2], and where's that fucking rainbow?![3], and I'm trying to ... and I want to be clean, and it's the dirt of the world that holds me back, you know / utterly convinced[3], and one of these spins I'll get myself so far GONE![3], and it's the really dirty people with their hands and their minds all over me / that cause me so much grief[3], and they look so clean! / that's the problem ...[3], and I'm spinning a-ROUND ... away, away, and away ... the rainbow, or the heaven, or the more than THREE / I don't know ... or care now[3], and these words aren't helping, man[3], and I could do without my feelings / just be empty / free, and away, clean, so clean![3], and the devils can live with it / oh, they might not even be aware / they might think they're "good" and "right"[3], and the sick in the soul don't ask questions when they've got all the money[3], and we can't save the ones who think they are saved[3], and, oh no ... / we can't help the ones whose righteousness is a sham / they are with SATAN!!![3], and

David Cameron says the archbishop of Westminster is a liar

Er ... 'Does he?!' Well, he seems to be saying that, son. Look at this! Interesting, eh? 'Yeah.' A politician is calling a senior man of God a liar. A man who will soon become a cardinal. 'Wow!' Now, I have no time for organized religion. (I have plenty of time for God. I love God, man. Not the square, old guy with the beard. I mean, the universal spirit.) But this is too much! It should be quite clear to anyone that Cameron is on an immoral mission. It's well known that hundreds of thousands of people are using food banks just to survive, and that many have committed suicide after having their benefits stopped. Meanwhile, there are big companies (like my mobile dongle internet thing company who couldn't organize a phone signal in a brewery) that don't pay any tax or at least avoid paying a large slice of the tax they should be paying. What's going on?!

Dear oh dear. / I, er ... Here's a good question: Has David Cameron ever met a poor person in his life? I am willing to believe he sees poor people from his car window as he is driven to functions where he sits on a golden throne. 'Ha!' (Do you remember that?) But has he actually met one in the flesh, and had a conversation with him or her about their situation? 'I doubt it.' Is he the prime minister only for the rich, or the whole country? 'The rich. / Do I win a prize, Mikey?' No. Shut up, Voice. / The funny thing is, I used to think that I couldn't stand Labour and Gordon Brown. 'They were bad, boss.' I used to think they were a disgrace. 'Yeah.' But the Conservatives and David Cameron have given me a deeper understanding and appreciation of the word "disgrace".

Man, let's hope, and pray, that there's a heaven. And a hell. Atheism makes life unbearable as far as I'm concerned.

Christ! I don't even want to write about this stuff. I hate it. Every time I write about politics I feel dirty and degraded afterwards. 'Worse than finance?!' Oh, much worse. However, I feel it's my duty to tell the truth to my readers about this society. 'You have to share your wisdom.' Of course I do!

Tuesday, 18 February 2014

I'm not in the mood for Edward Perkin leaving Goldman to join Eaton Vance

Yes, just like Pepijn Heins before him, Edward Perkin has left Goldman Sachs Asset Management to join Eaton Vance. However, I'm not in the mood for writing about it. Some, well ... slags, basically, have been dumping rubbish outside my house. Why are there so many degenerates around these days? This never used to happen. But now you can't walk along the pavement without having to dodge a sofa or some cupboards or a pissed-stained mattress.

Anyway, what's the attraction of Eaton Vance? First, the little lamb, Pepijn. Now Eddie Perkin wants a slice of the action. Well ... At Eaton Vance, we value independent thinking. We encourage our affiliated investment teams to share their perspectives. Because we believe that when investors hear a range of strongly argued perspectives, they sharpen their own independent views and then get ready for the blood and fire. / 'Great, Mikey!' Big deal. I'm not impressed, Voice. I've heard it all before.

This Perkin is chief equity investment officer or something. (Or he will be in April.) Oh, I hope he's happy. / Maybe he lives in a nice area where there are no scumbags. 'There are scumbags everywhere, boss.' Not in Malibu, surely? Man, I've just got to get my demo finished and then fuck off to Malibu. London is an open sewer. I can't take it no more!

He'll have to report to Faust. 'Who will?!' Eddie. 'Christ!' Yeah. In hell. Rather him than me. / There's always a downside to every new job. The grass is never greener. I suppose the money will be all right. But what will happen to Eddie's soul?

And I didn't even want to write about this! It's a disease, finance. / Oh, I feel dirty ... all over. I mean, Jean hasn't done the dusting yet. There's shit outside the house. And I've got finance in my head. What a life, eh? What a life!

Monday, 17 February 2014

Jean-Francois Boulier wants more work!

Oh, I'll find him something to do. Boulier has just taken over Shahid Ikram's job. Ikram was the chief investment officer at Aviva Investors, but Boulier looked at him with jealousy in his eyes (and his heart) and so took over the position. 'Mikey, hasn't this Boulier got enough on his plate?' Well, Voice, he's the chief executive for Aviva Investors in Europe, the chief executive for Aviva Investors in France, a member of some bullshit executive committee, and he writes for the French papers too. 'Bloody hell! And he wants more work?!' He's a raving lunatic, son. One of these workaholics we've heard so much about. But I'll find him something to do. He can start with the dusting. 'What?' Man, with this blog and all the music I'm into now, I haven't got time for household chores. The place is a right mess. I'll get Jean-Francois to help me out. I'll call him Jean. Yeah, Jean won't mind. 'I think he will, boss.' Why? 'He won't want to be your skivvy, man.' He'll do what I fucking well tell him. I'll be honest with you, I'm not impressed by these Aviva characters. They still haven't paid me that two million. And they hardly do any work, anyway, you know. I mean, look at Jean. How hard can it be, really, to be the chief executive of this and the chief executive of that when we all know it's Schroders that actually manages the funds, yeah? 'Yeah, I see your point.' They're a bunch of wasters. I'll put them all to work.

...


Monday morning, Monday morning. I don't like Mondays. Horrible days, they are.

I want my lunch, already. Bored, bored, bored. / I might play the guitar for the rest of the day. I wonder if Jean is musical. He might be good on bass or something. You never know. Some of these finance types have hidden depths. 'Do they?!' Well ...



Sort of update, yeah. / I've played a bit of guitar. Not in the mood for much more. But listen to this: John Squire playing Love Spreads in isolation from the rest of the track. Pretty awesome!

Friday, 14 February 2014

[No. 194] I don't need to know anything about Ines de Dinechin

I just get feelings about people, you know?

And people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[1], and ... how sad they are![1], and people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[2], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[1], and ... how sad they are![2], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![1], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[2], and people always want to know SOMETHING[1], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![2], and ... how sick they are![1], and people always want to know SOMETHING[2], and ... mystery?[1], and ... how sick they are![2], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![1], and ... mystery?[2], and people ... they expect too much[1], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![2], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![1], and people ... they expect too much[2], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[1], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![2], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[1], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[2], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[1], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[2], and / who?[1], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[2], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[1], and / who?[2], and people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[3], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[2], and ... how sad they are![3], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[3], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![3], and people always want to know SOMETHING[3], and ... how sick they are![3], and ... mystery?[3], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![3], and people ... they expect too much[3], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![3], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[3], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[3], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[3], and / who?[3], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[3], and

And people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[1], and ... how sad they are![1], and people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[2], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[1], and ... how sad they are![2], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![1], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[2], and people always want to know SOMETHING[1], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![2], and ... how sick they are![1], and people always want to know SOMETHING[2], and ... mystery?[1], and ... how sick they are![2], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![1], and ... mystery?[2], and people ... they expect too much[1], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![2], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![1], and people ... they expect too much[2], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[1], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![2], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[1], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[2], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[1], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[2], and / who?[1], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[2], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[1], and / who?[2], and people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[3], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[2], and ... how sad they are![3], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[3], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![3], and people always want to know SOMETHING[3], and ... how sick they are![3], and ... mystery?[3], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![3], and people ... they expect too much[3], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![3], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[3], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[3], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[3], and / who?[3], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[3], and

And people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[1], and ... how sad they are![1], and people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[2], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[1], and ... how sad they are![2], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![1], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[2], and people always want to know SOMETHING[1], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![2], and ... how sick they are![1], and people always want to know SOMETHING[2], and ... mystery?[1], and ... how sick they are![2], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![1], and ... mystery?[2], and people ... they expect too much[1], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![2], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![1], and people ... they expect too much[2], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[1], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![2], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[1], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[2], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[1], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[2], and / who?[1], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[2], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[1], and / who?[2], and people ask me ... what do I know of this Ines, and I say I don't need to know NOTHING ... / just feel, yeah?[3], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[2], and ... how sad they are![3], and it would be a terrible life for me ... if I were so square as to deal in facts that ... no sane person should want to know[3], and a-ROUND, we can forget, oh Ines, oh YOU(!) ... and a-ROUND, come on / and a-ROUND ... come on!!![3], and people always want to know SOMETHING[3], and ... how sick they are![3], and ... mystery?[3], and I don't know about mystery / I got love, man / Love for Ines, and love for EVERYONE![3], and people ... they expect too much[3], and so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... yeah, and a-ROUND / Feel the love![3], and I do all this for a reason / It's not emptiness / I get full / I get the WHOLE COSMOS[3], and it's a TOTAL EXPERIENCE ... it's like ... well ... / just get dizzy and you will know[3], and, Ines ... forget Lyxor! / Lyxor is in the past / Let it go! / It does not exist if you're happy and more than THREE[3], and / who?[3], and what will she do now, this Ines? / and what will any of us do?[3], and

Ines de Dinechin has left Lyxor Asset Management

I'm listening to The Stone Roses by ... The Stone Roses. When I first bought the album on vinyl, it had only sold sixty thousand copies, so I guess that makes me a cool cat, yeah? 'Yeah.' / But enough of that. Let's concentrate on business. Ines de Dinechin has left Lyxor Asset Management. 'Who is this Ines?' Well, Ines was the chief executive and the chairman of Lyxor, and she's a woman. 'What is this Lyxor?' Lyxor is an asset thing, and it's a firm. So ... there's no mystery no more, eh? Everything is clear now. Though I'll be creating some mystery later by taking Ines for a spin in my new No. 194. 'How much did that set you back, Mikey?' Nothing, Voice.

Oh, Lionel Paquin is taking over as chief. Good luck to him! There are no problems at Lyxor with respect to the company's atmosphere or business activity, so Lionel should have an easy time of things.

Well, well ... / Er ... Forget business activity! Atmosphere is the stuff you need. If I had my own firm, I would play Brian Eno's Apollo all day long to soothe my staff and get them all spaced out. 'That's night music, man.' We would only work at night. 'What about the markets?' Fuck the markets, son! Sometimes you have to do things your own way. You have to be a maverick.

Maybe Lyxor will give me a call. Maybe Lionel won't cut the mustard. Not that I'm into ETFs. I think they're the devil's work.

I'm listening to Second Coming now. Not as good, obviously. Squire's lyrics are a bit dodgy.

My music? I'm growing in confidence, man. I've got two classic pop songs written and recorded. You're Lying will be done soon. My Heart is in reserve, with my best lyric. I've got another great tune with no lyrics. My guitar playing is improving. My singing is good enough ... these days. / This is nothing like the early days, late Eighties, early Nineties, when I first tried to make it. My age? Age don't mean shit if you've got your shit together, man. 'Didn't Plato say that?' No. 'Wittgenstein?' No, Voice, it was Nietzsche. 'Oh.' Idiot!

Wednesday, 12 February 2014

[No. 193] Rainy days and Wednesdays always get me down

Well, sometimes.

And, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[1], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![1], and, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[2], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[1], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![2], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[1], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[2], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[1], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[2], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![1], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[2], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![1], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![2], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[1], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![2], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[1], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[2], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[1], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[2], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[1], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[2], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![1], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[2], and here comes the rain again[1], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![2], and, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[3], and here comes the rain again[2], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![3], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[3], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[3], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[3], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![3], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![3], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[3], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[3], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[3], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[3], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![3], and here comes the rain again[3], and

And, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[1], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![1], and, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[2], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[1], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![2], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[1], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[2], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[1], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[2], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![1], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[2], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![1], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![2], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[1], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![2], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[1], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[2], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[1], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[2], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[1], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[2], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![1], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[2], and here comes the rain again[1], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![2], and, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[3], and here comes the rain again[2], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![3], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[3], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[3], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[3], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![3], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![3], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[3], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[3], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[3], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[3], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![3], and here comes the rain again[3], and

And, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[1], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![1], and, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[2], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[1], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![2], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[1], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[2], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[1], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[2], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![1], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[2], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![1], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![2], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[1], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![2], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[1], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[2], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[1], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[2], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[1], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[2], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![1], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[2], and here comes the rain again[1], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![2], and, well ... I'm talking to myself and feeling old ... and spinning a-ROUND, nothing to do but frown[3], and here comes the rain again[2], and, honestly ... there's NOTHING else to do![3], and yeah oh yeah / spinning a-ROUND / some kind of lonely clown / don't know which kind though[3], and I'm taking it real slow ... ain't got the energy to get DIZZY on a rainbow (which ain't shit anyway)[3], and, oh ... hello, hello, hello! / seen it all before, and felt it all, known it all, no surprises, but -[3], and / there's no need to talk it out / Look into my eyes![3], and, really ... spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, spinning a-ROUND, ha![3], and I'm here with YOU(!) / nice to know somebody loves me[3], and I suppose ... yeah, yeah, yeah ... talking to myself ... do things ever change?[3], and I love the rain / it washes memories off the sidewalk of life[3], and YOU(!) / can go out, a-splishin' and a-splashin' .. if you want to ... just like Bobby Darin in the bath, er ...[3], and I don't know, man ... getting desperate now ... in the flood ... we need an ark!!![3], and here comes the rain again[3], and

Simon Hynes will be the chief executive of Jupiter

One day. Oh, one day. Be patient. / It's just a feeling I have about the man. He is being groomed. 'Isn't that illegal, Mikey?' No, Voice, it isn't. It's all above board. Jupiter aren't a bunch of degenerates, you know. / Simon has just been promoted to global head of distribution, by the way. One interesting fact though: a lot of people mistake Simon Hynes for Simon Somerville. 'They do look pretty similar, boss.' No they don't. As I've said before, Simon Somerville is a reasonably cheerful chap, but he has a hint of melancholy that sets him apart. Simon Hynes is outrageously cheerful, essentially soulless - perfect chief executive material. Somerville would be disastrous as chief executive because - very much like myself - he isn't able to control his moods. Imagine him in an important meeting or maybe a media interview, getting bored, getting depressed, wistfully staring out of the window, then slowly taking his clothes off and setting fire to his hair, his body hair, all of it. 'That would damage the business, man.' Of course it would! That's why Somerville should stay where he is. He's got different fish to fry, anyway.

...


Music update? 'Yeah!' Yeah, might as well. Music is more interesting than finance, ain't it? / I haven't recorded You're Lying yet. It's my best song, and I'm scared of making a hash of it. Give me more time. I need more time! / Oh, I've taken the delay off the Gilly, Gilly recording. It sounds better without it - clearer, man.

Lunch? Luxury egg sandwich. When my ship comes in, it'll be luxury egg sandwiches all the way, every day, I'm sure.

After lunch? Er ... No. 193, son. / Laters ...

Tuesday, 11 February 2014

Who is Allan Bedwick?

Oh, I should have stayed in bed. Yeah ... well. / There's this Allan Bedwick, see. Er ... he used to be a hedgie. He got sick of it. Completely understandable, eh? / But now he's coming back with a new hedge fund in Hong Kong. Christ. And he's dragging some mate of his along, Leland Lim (an ex-Goldman shaman). Into the mess. Ha! Oh God. / The chaos. The grief of trying to make money in this world. When you don't actually need it. What the fuck?! You could be on a tropical island. With palm trees. A sandy beach. Why torture yourself?

And I woke up at five this morning, thinking: It's because we have bodies. Our bodies are the problem. If we were pure spirit, everything would be better. / This ain't for Leland Lim. He should know this. I doubt Allan Bedwick has a clue though.

We have to work. We have to make money. Food and shelter and all that shit. But how much is enough?

Spirits don't care. Spirits are free, you dig? They're free to wander the cosmos with gay abandon.

Nothing to do with hedgies, this. People in general, everywhere. / Once you've got a spirit in a body, it's another game, my friend(s). They start getting ideas, you know? Physical life, material life ... it just tricks them. They look around and start making ludicrous plans. And they believe the most bizarre things ... "We must preserve this." / "We must honour that." / "Those men [evil twats] should be remembered." / God, meanwhile, is laughing His arse off. He can't believe the comedy of it all. It's the best show in town.

Unless you're a great soul, fully awake, you only get wise after you've died. Sad, but true.

To make any progress at all ... / You've got to stop thinking about who you are and where you are. YOU ARE NO ONE. Oh yes. YOU ARE NOWHERE. Please try to understand.

Your political views, your personal philosophy ... Oh, are you taking the piss?! How small does your world need to be before you finally do away with all of the nonsense?

Set yourself free, in your body, on this earth, right now. Walk around, smile at strangers, burn your money. Get naked.

I don't know what the situation is with you. / Just remember: You can wake up - if you want to. It's your choice.

Monday, 10 February 2014

What's this Barclays data loss/theft nonsense all about?

Oh dear ... / It's Monday morning, so ... I'm not going to get into this in any depth, if you don't mind. (I've got different fish to fry.) I'm just wondering what all the fuss is about, man.

Confidential information of 27,000 Barclays customers has been sold to dodgy City brokers, apparently. / Well, this is what happens when you deal with a bank, man. Are we supposed to be surprised? People have got to start taking responsibility for their money and their confidential information, you dig? If you want to keep your money safe, put it under the mattress. If you want to keep your personal details safe, don't say shit to anyone about anything. Just keep your fucking mouth shut, all right? / Jesus! This is all common sense, surely. I mean ... My advice? Live in a cave. Because it's only a matter of time before civilization comes crashing down around our ears anyway.
 

_________________________


Music update? 'Yeah, Mikey!!!' Really, Voice? All right. / Well, I've recorded a better version of Gilly, Gilly. It's pop again now, rather than garage band. And I really like it, man. I'm keeping it this way. So ... I've just got to record You're Lying. Today or tomorrow, maybe.

You've got to trust your instincts. / I didn't go to the pub on Friday because I had a feeling about the song, you know? Then I recorded it in a different way, with a slightly different rhythm and pace - by accident, really. And I put a bit of delay on it. The song is transformed!

It's like ... my best songwriting is often done at three or four in the morning when I should be asleep. If you want to be creative, you've got to be ready at the drop of a hat. / De Niro says you shouldn't have anything in your life that you can't walk out on in thirty seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner. 'What?!' It's the same sort of thing, Voice. You've got to be ready to rock at any moment.

Thursday, 6 February 2014

[No. 192] Kathryn Langridge ... a-ROUND with me

Without Colin Croft!

And Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[1], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[1], and Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[2], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[1], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[2], and this is inner space[1], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[2], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[1], and this is inner space[2], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[1], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[2], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![1], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[2], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[1], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[1], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[2], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[2], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[1], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[2], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![1], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[2], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[1], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![2], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[1], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[2], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[1], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[2], and / ...[1], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[2], and Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[3], and / ...[2], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[3], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[3], and this is inner space[3], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[3], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[3], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![3], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[3], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[3], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[3], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![3], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[3], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[3], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[3], and / ...[3], and

And Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[1], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[1], and Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[2], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[1], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[2], and this is inner space[1], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[2], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[1], and this is inner space[2], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[1], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[2], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![1], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[2], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[1], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[1], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[2], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[2], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[1], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[2], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![1], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[2], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[1], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![2], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[1], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[2], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[1], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[2], and / ...[1], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[2], and Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[3], and / ...[2], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[3], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[3], and this is inner space[3], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[3], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[3], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![3], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[3], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[3], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[3], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![3], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[3], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[3], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[3], and / ...[3], and

And Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[1], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[1], and Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[2], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[1], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[2], and this is inner space[1], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[2], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[1], and this is inner space[2], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[1], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[2], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![1], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[2], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[1], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[1], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[2], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[2], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[1], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[2], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![1], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[2], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[1], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![2], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[1], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[2], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[1], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[2], and / ...[1], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[2], and Colin's not welcome here ... this is for Kathy, and for me ... and for anyone else who's got the spirit for it[3], and / ...[2], and a-ROUND again with an old friend / I tell you, I'll never get bored[3], and three's a crowd, so no Colin ... but thousands are a party! / I've seen so many spinners[3], and this is inner space[3], and it's just like getting a-ROUND Jupiter ... the planet, I'm talking about[3], and I ain't making my "round" literature for "squares", man / some readers will never understand[3], and I'm thinking of the SPINNERS who want to get DIZZY out of their heads / Hello![3], and this is the first time DIZZY for Kathy[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... It never gets old / Millions of years will pass ...[3], and Kathy respects Screaming Lord Woodford for following me into the desert ... oh, I can dig that[3], and / ... such a long time ago / when the world was young[3], and Kathy should have come to me first ... / Woodford was my student, yeah? / OH YEAH![3], and I'm not bitter / I know what I've achieved[3], and I'm seeing Kathy / with my eyes, she spins like a dream ... / and I've never been so ... awake[3], and / 'It's all a dream, son'[3], and / ...[3], and