Thursday, 30 June 2016

GAM is buying Cantab Capital for $217 million or ... $292 million

[I took another bubble bath with my pants on ...]

It all depends on whom you believe, dear reader(s). Personally, I don't believe anyone. I'm just not the trusting type, you know? 'Boss, this deal won't go through.' Oh no? Tell us why, expert. 'Because ... of all the Lego, the messing about.' Ha! Well, I'm sure Ewan Kirk and the gang have kept that quiet. 'All GAM has got to do is search on the internet.' Well, maybe GAM doesn't care, Voice. I don't know.

We are one of the world's leading independent, pure-play asset managers. We put our clients' capital to work by providing active investment solutions across a broad range of capabilities. Our core investment business is complemented by private labelling solutions, which include management company and other support services for third-party asset managers. We employ over 1,000 people in 11 countries with investment centres in London, Zurich, Hong Kong, New York, Milan and Lugano. The investment managers are supported by an extensive global distribution network.

That's GAM, that is. / Yes, notice the "play" bit. They ain't got no problem with Lego. Ewan Kirk is obviously a man after their own hearts. 'What happens to Ewan and the gang?' Oh, they're staying, as a part of GAM. But they'll probably have to do some work now, for once in their lives. 'Ha! I doubt it. That infernal computer of theirs does most of the work, surely?' Yeah, I suppose. I don't know. What do I know?! NOTHING!!!

Nothing. And that's the way I like it. Ignorance is bliss.

...

End of the week. Anything else? Music? What am I listening to? I'm having a Dead Legends of 2016 day today. 'Eh?' I'm listening to Bowie and Prince, Voice. 'Oh. Couldn't you just say that?' / Yeah, songs like Ballad of Dorothy Parker and Red Sails.

Oh, I got those Yamaha strings yesterday. I went to the Yamaha shop in Wardour Street, and they didn't even have them on display. They had to get them from the stockroom. / Hardly anyone knows about these beautiful-sounding strings. Well, it's the world's loss. I don't care. But if you're interested, dear reader(s), they're light FS50BT. I just wish they were a bit cheaper, that's all. (I've spent a small fortune on strings lately.) However, when Picasso was about to start work on a masterpiece he always got a special canvas - no expense spared!

Wednesday, 29 June 2016

UK retail investors pull out of property funds

Yeah, just another look at one of last night's PR emails. I got them all jumbled up, didn't I? Sorry about that, dear reader(s).

UK retail investors are pulling out of Property and UK Equity funds and switching into Global and Japan equities, according to analysis by rplan.co.uk, the online investment platform. The analysis shows that the number of trades on the rplan.co.uk platform was up 175% over the weekend following the Brexit vote versus the previous weekend, and 76% of withdrawals was from Property funds and 22% from UK equity funds. The volume of switching between funds was 4.5 times higher than the previous weekend. The sectors most bought overall included Global Equities (56%), Japan Equities (20%), UK Equities (16%) and North America Equities (5%).

Okay. Well, I'm not surprised.

Stuart Dyer, rplan.co.uk's Chief Investment Officer, commented: "UK investors' fears about the prospects for property are striking. Clearly, there are worries that property would be affected by a possible economic downturn and the withdrawal of foreign investors."

Dear oh dear. I don't know. I just don't know any more.

...

Yeah, just one short post today. I might go out later, if it's not raining too much. I think it's going to rain a bit.

I'm wondering if I need new guitar strings, you know? The original Yamaha strings that came with my Yamaha acoustic had a really nice sound, but they cost £15. Martin strings are only £3 or £4 a set. / Well, it's my problem. Don't worry about it.

I've already wasted too much money on strings. Like those stupid resophonic ones which were for a totally different sort of guitar. 'It's not their problem though, boss.' I'm just saying, Voice, that's all. If I don't talk about my strings, I'm going to have to talk about finance. 'Heaven forbid!' Exactly.

Ah, that's enough.

Laters, man.

Tuesday, 28 June 2016

[No. 427] The Tuesday night PR email

Back by popular demand!

And here we are again, still spinning[1], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[1], and here we are again, still spinning[2], and ... who cares?[1], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[2], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[1], and ... who cares?[2], and a-ROUND? oh yes[1], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[2], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![1], and a-ROUND? oh yes[2], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[1], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![2], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[1], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[2], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[1], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[2], and it's all fragments, man![1], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[2], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[1], and it's all fragments, man![2], and disaster was predicted!!![1], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[2], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[1], and disaster was predicted!!![2], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[1], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[2], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[1], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[2], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[1], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[2], and ... NONSENSE!!![1], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[2], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[1], and ... NONSENSE!!![2], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[1], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[2], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[1], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[2], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[1], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[2], and here we are again, still spinning[3], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[2], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[3], and ... who cares?[3], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[3], and a-ROUND? oh yes[3], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![3], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[3], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[3], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[3], and it's all fragments, man![3], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[3], and disaster was predicted!!![3], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[3], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[3], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[3], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[3], and ... NONSENSE!!![3], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[3], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[3], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[3], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[3], and

And here we are again, still spinning[1], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[1], and here we are again, still spinning[2], and ... who cares?[1], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[2], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[1], and ... who cares?[2], and a-ROUND? oh yes[1], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[2], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![1], and a-ROUND? oh yes[2], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[1], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![2], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[1], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[2], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[1], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[2], and it's all fragments, man![1], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[2], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[1], and it's all fragments, man![2], and disaster was predicted!!![1], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[2], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[1], and disaster was predicted!!![2], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[1], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[2], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[1], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[2], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[1], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[2], and ... NONSENSE!!![1], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[2], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[1], and ... NONSENSE!!![2], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[1], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[2], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[1], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[2], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[1], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[2], and here we are again, still spinning[3], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[2], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[3], and ... who cares?[3], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[3], and a-ROUND? oh yes[3], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![3], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[3], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[3], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[3], and it's all fragments, man![3], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[3], and disaster was predicted!!![3], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[3], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[3], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[3], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[3], and ... NONSENSE!!![3], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[3], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[3], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[3], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[3], and

And here we are again, still spinning[1], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[1], and here we are again, still spinning[2], and ... who cares?[1], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[2], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[1], and ... who cares?[2], and a-ROUND? oh yes[1], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[2], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![1], and a-ROUND? oh yes[2], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[1], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![2], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[1], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[2], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[1], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[2], and it's all fragments, man![1], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[2], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[1], and it's all fragments, man![2], and disaster was predicted!!![1], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[2], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[1], and disaster was predicted!!![2], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[1], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[2], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[1], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[2], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[1], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[2], and ... NONSENSE!!![1], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[2], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[1], and ... NONSENSE!!![2], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[1], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[2], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[1], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[2], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[1], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[2], and here we are again, still spinning[3], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[2], and the combination will be highly complementary ... creating a larger global alternative asset class advisory platform with ...[3], and ... who cares?[3], and I, I ... can ... connect NOTHING with NOTHING in a world GONE(!) crazy - uh, if I want to, and I want to[3], and a-ROUND? oh yes[3], and Alan Greenspan says: "We're in hell when you Brexit" / Inflation coming! / Early days of a crisis![3], and 76% of withdrawals was from property funds and 22% from UK equity funds ...[3], and ... many emails! / and jumbled a-ROUND, you dig?[3], and ... But at Turquoise, we believe it hasn't so much died as broadened in meaning - 'Eh?'[3], and it's all fragments, man![3], and when a shock result sinks in, we sink, down, down, down ...[3], and disaster was predicted!!![3], and a trigger for more people to move their British pensions out of the UK - ?! - ?! - ?! / Yes, yes, yes ... the old wise man was right[3], and ... GOLD! GOLD! GOLD! ... / Always believe in your soul, you're indestructible[3], and invest in the development of our service offering and expansion of our global footprint ... why not?[3], and 'Boss, my tiny brain screams for sense!'[3], and ... NONSENSE!!![3], and we firmly believe that our partnership with Pavilion will ... who knows?[3], and consciousness, yes, but no physical brain, not on the astral plane, surely?[3], and unfunded liabilities estimated to be between $100 trillion and $200 trillion - what ... ?! - ?! / America ... 'Oh'[3], and - ENOUGH! / No, more ...[3], and

James Ind? Dynamic Absolute Return fund?

Oh, it's supposed to be a new fund. Christ! / Do you remember this, dear reader(s), (when James didn't update his LinkedIn profile)? -

Christ! Do I have to do everything for these people? (Remember when I had to correct Mike Belbeck's spelling mistakes?) / James Ind is working at GLG Partners now. He's joined the macro team - for his sins. They'll be launching a new fund for him soon. James is going to be managing a total return strategy. 'Sounds exciting, Mikey. You would think he would want to boast about it on his LinkedIn profile.' I know, Voice. I just can't understand the guy. 'Maybe he's lazy.' Who has ever heard of a lazy fund manager, man? 'Maybe he's so over the moon that he ain't thinking straight.' I don't know. I suppose there's a chance he doesn't care about LinkedIn. 'Well, it's Facebook for squares, isn't it?' Yeah. / Oh, guess who his boss is - or one of his bosses. 'Who?' Only Jamil Baz. 'That lunatic!' Yes. The man who thinks I'm going to be writing about financial disaster for the next twenty years. / Jamil, twenty  years from now I'll be a rock legend, son. I ain't doing this shit for another twenty years! 'You tell him, Mikey.' Unbelievable!

Right, two things. Firstly, Jamil Baz was on to something, as much as it pains me to admit it. I probably will be writing about financial disaster for the next twenty years BECAUSE(!) ... that's all we've got now, ain't it? [Since the conservatives in this green and pleasant land decided to wreck capitalism in a way that anarchists and socialists and terrorists aren't even capable of, don't even have the imagination for.] / Er ... 'And, secondly, boss?' Secondly, Voice, I have more bad news. James Ind isn't at GLG no more. 'Oh.' He's at Barings Bank now. 'Ha! A bank that went out of business in 1995.' Yes, James is another poor soul who has been fooled by the conmen. 'How does it even work, boss?' Well, I reckon these grifters approach guys like James and say: Ere, mate, do you fancy working for a top bank? I can get you in, but it's gonna cost you. Just slip me a monkey, and I'll see what I can do. 'Oh, that's clever.' Yeah, they're making a fortune out of this scam.

...

Anything else? The death of capitalism? I'm just wondering ... Russell Brand or David Cameron, you know? 'Jesus!' Our Russell talks a good game, sure. But Dave has got to be the man for me. / It's amazing how things have turned out ...

Music? I'm listening to the first three songs of U2's The Joshua Tree. It's a great start to an album.

My music? Don't ask! I'm still messing around with my new song, trying to get a decent recording of it.

Laters, man.

Monday, 27 June 2016

[No. 426] No need to stop the world

I got off ages ago.

And ... for crying out loud![1], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![1], and ... for crying out loud![2], and so DIZZY(!) sick[1], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![2], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[1], and so DIZZY(!) sick[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[1], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[2], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[2], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[1], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[2], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![1], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[2], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![1], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![2], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[1], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[1], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[2], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[2], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[1], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[2], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[1], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[2], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[1], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[2], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[1], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[2], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[1], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[2], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[1], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[2], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![1], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[2], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[1], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![2], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![1], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[2], and ... for crying out loud![3], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![2], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![3], and so DIZZY(!) sick[3], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[3], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[3], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[3], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![3], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![3], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[3], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[3], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[3], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[3], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[3], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[3], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[3], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[3], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![3], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[3], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![3], and

And ... for crying out loud![1], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![1], and ... for crying out loud![2], and so DIZZY(!) sick[1], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![2], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[1], and so DIZZY(!) sick[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[1], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[2], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[2], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[1], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[2], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![1], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[2], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![1], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![2], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[1], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[1], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[2], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[2], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[1], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[2], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[1], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[2], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[1], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[2], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[1], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[2], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[1], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[2], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[1], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[2], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![1], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[2], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[1], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![2], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![1], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[2], and ... for crying out loud![3], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![2], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![3], and so DIZZY(!) sick[3], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[3], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[3], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[3], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![3], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![3], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[3], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[3], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[3], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[3], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[3], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[3], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[3], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[3], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![3], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[3], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![3], and

And ... for crying out loud![1], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![1], and ... for crying out loud![2], and so DIZZY(!) sick[1], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![2], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[1], and so DIZZY(!) sick[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[1], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[2], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[2], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[1], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[2], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![1], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[2], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![1], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![2], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[1], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[1], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[2], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[2], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[1], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[2], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[1], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[2], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[1], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[2], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[1], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[2], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[1], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[2], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[1], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[2], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![1], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[2], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[1], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![2], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![1], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[2], and ... for crying out loud![3], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![2], and what did I say? / and what did GEORGE SOROS say? / Is everyone awake - NOW?![3], and so DIZZY(!) sick[3], and the world doesn't care about our glorious past ... / ... and what do we look like?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... gotta keep going, man, until I'm totally numb[3], and I ain't got no beautiful balloon / I'm just spinning my way out of the shit, that's all[3], and the hollow men make me laugh ...[3], and I need Tony Robbins in my life more than ever now / Save me, Tony!!![3], and when George Soros speaks ... you fucking listen![3], and dinner? / Baked beans, I'm afraid[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and Jesus H. Christ, make your humble servant totally dumb[3], and now everyone is coming down to my level / Oh, I've been here for years[3], and democracy is the joke that just ain't funny no more[3], and ... WHERE IS OUR NEW MASTER? / Er ... crawling out of a gutter somewhere[3], and ... / ... / ... / ... or crawling out of hell[3], and ... "Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste"[3], and I can connect NOTHING with NOTHING / I don't actually want to[3], and the world keeps spinning, just like me / There is no end to the insanity[3], and ... 'Help!' / Ha![3], and I don't need to be on the last helicopter out / I'm totally GONE(!) in the head, you dig?[3], and goodbye / oh, hello - again![3], and

Yippee! Crispin Odey can buy a new hot air balloon

It's all right for some, ain't it? Crispin made a fortune out of Brexit. Hundreds of millions, I think. 'Will he fly away in his beautiful new balloon, boss?' I'm not sure we're that lucky, Voice. He'll probably stick around. There could be more money lying on the ground today. All you've got to do, dear reader(s), is pick it up.

...

Er ... actually, I have some questions about the referendum result -

Why did Boris Johnson and Michael Gove look so miserable and scared on Friday? And why aren't they taking charge now? Are they getting cold feet because they realize they're going to be the rulers of the Waste Land?

Why is Daniel Hannan saying that mass immigration will continue? And is Nigel Farage happy about this?

When are all these exciting new trade deals going to be completed? Or even begun?


London voted to remain in the EU. Why should it continue to bankroll the oldy worldly fantasies of the rest of England?


How come the NHS isn't going to get that extra money?

If Scotland - as looks likely - leaves the Union, in what sense have we got our country back?

Sinn Fein want a referendum now. Who's going to tell them that they can't have one? And then what will happen?

Why do the Brexiters think the other EU countries should play nice? They owe us some favours, do they?

Are we supposed to believe that businesses want to invest in countries that are in a state of chaos? How's Somalia coming along?

If the Brexiters have such a hard-on for the past, is there any particular reason why they can't just buy a box set of Foyle's War from Amazon?

Finally: What's the fucking plan?

Friday, 24 June 2016

EMERGENCY STATEMENT: from the world's foremost financial shaman

We're all doomed!

...

My predictions for the next few years -

A new far right, almost fascist, government (for a while)

Financial and political chaos

Social chaos, unemployment, poverty, homelessness, more racism, maybe riots

Immigration may go down a bit, but could easily stay the same

National debt to go through the roof

The NHS to be sold off

Scotland to leave the Union

...

Er, but on a more positive note -

It's going to be very entertaining watching the new government trying to deliver everything that was promised

Thursday, 23 June 2016

Caroline Gibson has gone to Resmark!

Yes, it's the Thursday morning PR email, back by popular demand.

Los Angeles, the city of angels - The Resmark Companies, a leading private equity firm specializing in U.S. real estate investment, has named Caroline Gibson as Director of U.S. and International Investor Relations. She will lead a new initiative to develop a coalition of U.S. and international institutional investors to augment Resmark's current investor base.

Brilliant!

"Over the past decade Caroline has advised U.S., European and Middle East institutional investors, major real estate companies, banks, endowments and sovereign wealth funds on establishing operations in Europe and the United Kingdom," said Robert N. Goodman, Resmark Chairman and Chief Executive Officer. "She is a trusted advisor to top level executives of these organizations, counseling them on cultural and business customs as well as identifying and hiring appropriate local talent to grow their businesses."

Nice one!

Ms. Gibson will also engage with the emerging manager community to support Resmark's program for investing with and mentoring small real estate managers on behalf of institutional investors. She will work with academic institutions, industry associations and other sector constituents to enhance Resmark's presence in the emerging manager space, including identifying prospective emerging managers that bring diversity and fresh thinking to the field of institutional investing.

And that's all I need to know. Obviously, I wish Caroline all the best with her new job. 'Er ... what about the interview, boss?' Ha! Oh, I've been asked, dear reader(s), if I want an interview with Ms Gibson. Man, I want a date with her! [You haven't seen her picture in the email. Wow! 'Don't be sexist, Mikey!' Shut it, you ponce!]

Blackstone Group has bought a stake in Marathon Asset Management

[Update: Simon has been in touch, and he reckons there are two Marathons. One in New York, the one in this post. And the bigger and better one in London, where he is. I don't know if I should believe him or not. 'Why would he lie, boss?' I don't know. Why have they got the same name then? 'There's a Snickers one in Germany, too.' Don't be ridiculous, Voice! / Let's give Simon the benefit of the doubt, reader(s) - even if it does ruin my post. I'm gutted about this!]

Why? Why?! Why?

Oh, I know why. My dear friend Simon Somerville works at Marathon now (well, soon, I think), and - 'Snickers, boss?' Yes, that's an old joke, Voice - and, uh, and ... EVERYONE loves our Simon. 'Do they?' Yes. 'Why?' Ha!

We all know why. It's the cheerful face with a hint of melancholy. 'Oh, not that again.' Yes, that again. Any soulless robot working in finance can be cheerful. It's easy when you're making good money and you have a bright future. But the melancholy! The melancholy creeps in ... when the sun is setting, you feel a bit lonely, you start thinking about the futility of everything, it's the death of another day in your life, the night is coming on ... it's a true humanity. And that's what Simon Somerville has. It's why we love him so much. It's why Blackstone wants a piece of the action.

...

Anything else? Politics? The referendum? If Leave wins today it won't be because of  "sovereignty" or "democracy" or any bullshit like that, it will be because the working classes have taken their revenge on the middle classes. Think about it, man. The comfortable middle classes in the south of England have supported the Tory austerity war against the poor. They don't give a shit if poor people are using food banks or their children are going to school with holes in their shoes. But today the working classes have a chance to crash property prices by 20 or even 30 per cent. / Unfortunately, a far more deranged government could replace the present one in the coming days. Hopefully, it won't happen. Let's wait and see.

Wednesday, 22 June 2016

Mark Denham has joined Carmignac

For reasons best known to himself. Jesus! I don't know what's going on, reader(s). I mean, it's the middle of the summer season, for God's sake! 'Eh? What's all this about, boss?' Mark Denham is/was a "fund manager" at Aviva Investors, Voice. 'Oh.' Everyone's in the park now, even though the weather ain't great yet. (I'm sure it will get better.) Our Mark should be eating ice cream with the rest of the gang, but ... 'He's gone to Carmignac.' Yeah. I can't understand it.

Carmignac?

The European adventure began in 1999 with the opening of a subsidiary in Luxembourg. Carmignac funds are currently distributed in 12 European countries including Italy, Germany, Spain and the United Kingdom. Er, well, a single challenge from the outset: identify opportunities and sources of growth all around the world while managing risks. How? Christ! Our fund managers and analysts, with 10 different nationalities and unique international experience, apply active management to generate performance on nearly 50 financial marketplaces worldwide.

So ... 'It sounds like a great firm, boss.' It is a great firm, Voice. But why would anyone want to leave Aviva Investors?! 'Well, Carmignac has made our Mark the head of its European equities team.' Yes, but he had a similar position at Aviva Investors. 'Ha! Come on, Mikey, man. We all know what goes on at that place.' Yeah.

Uh, nothing goes on. NOTHING goes on. Only fun, of course. Are they turning against fun now? Why couldn't Mark wait until the autumn, or winter? 'Then he would miss the pub season. Face it, boss, Mr Denham is one of these terrible workaholics.' NO! I refuse to believe that.

I just refuse!

Ah, let's change the subject. I - 'By the way, have you seen the picture of Chris Murphy on the Aviva Investors website?' What? 'He's the global head of equities.' Yes, I know, Voice, he looks like Jack Nicholson. The same features, the same derangement in the eyes. Very amusing.

...

Let's change the subject, please. / Music? I screwed up on the guitar strings, dear reader(s). I thought I was getting some fancy strings with a special space-age resophonic coating, but ... I wasn't. What I was getting was strings for a resonator guitar, for the love of Christ! I've never even heard of such guitars. (Apparently, the guitar on the cover of Dire Straits' Brothers in Arms is a resonator.) So ... I've got even more strings coming today, man. Medium Martins, 80/20 bronze. I normally use lights, but I need a better sound now.

Laters.

Tuesday, 21 June 2016

[No. 425] George Soros has spoken

We're all doomed!

And wise old man, seen it all![1], and words, words, words ...[1], and wise old man, seen it all![2], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[1], and words, words, words ...[2], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![1], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[2], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![1], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![2], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[1], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![2], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[1], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[2], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[1], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[2], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![1], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[2], and ... surely not that far back![1], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![2], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[1], and ... surely not that far back![2], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[1], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[2], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[1], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[1], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[2], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[2], and Malibu?[1], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[2], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[1], and Malibu?[2], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![1], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[2], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[1], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![2], and wise old man, seen it all![3], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[2], and words, words, words ...[3], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[3], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![3], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![3], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[3], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[3], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[3], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![3], and ... surely not that far back![3], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[3], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[3], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[3], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[3], and Malibu?[3], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[3], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![3], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[3], and

And wise old man, seen it all![1], and words, words, words ...[1], and wise old man, seen it all![2], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[1], and words, words, words ...[2], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![1], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[2], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![1], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![2], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[1], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![2], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[1], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[2], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[1], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[2], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![1], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[2], and ... surely not that far back![1], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![2], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[1], and ... surely not that far back![2], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[1], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[2], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[1], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[1], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[2], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[2], and Malibu?[1], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[2], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[1], and Malibu?[2], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![1], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[2], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[1], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![2], and wise old man, seen it all![3], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[2], and words, words, words ...[3], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[3], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![3], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![3], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[3], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[3], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[3], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![3], and ... surely not that far back![3], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[3], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[3], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[3], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[3], and Malibu?[3], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[3], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![3], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[3], and

And wise old man, seen it all![1], and words, words, words ...[1], and wise old man, seen it all![2], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[1], and words, words, words ...[2], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![1], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[2], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![1], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![2], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[1], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![2], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[1], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[2], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[1], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[2], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![1], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[2], and ... surely not that far back![1], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![2], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[1], and ... surely not that far back![2], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[1], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[2], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[1], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[1], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[2], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[2], and Malibu?[1], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[2], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[1], and Malibu?[2], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![1], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[2], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[1], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![2], and wise old man, seen it all![3], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[2], and words, words, words ...[3], and how much will Mr Soros make this time?[3], and I want to be free of sickening words!!![3], and I doubt very much that he will have to seek safety in baked beans like me - a whole bath of baked beans![3], and what will happen, really? / Oh, I don't want to speculate[3], and money, money, money, uh, say it three times, I dare YOU(!), and see what happens[3], and ... not a lot, probably NOTHING[3], and, uh ... the idiots won't listen, of course / their heads are full of King Arthur and some fucking round table or something - ?!?![3], and ... surely not that far back![3], and, yes, I can see the attraction of mad emotions ...[3], and George doesn't care / and it's win and win and win for him / but we'll be in the gutter, kooks[3], and it's times like these times that I just want to forget ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, we go ... the same old comedy, but it's hard to laugh[3], and try to smile, at least, my kooks[3], and Malibu?[3], and until I get to Malibu, all I got is the DIZZY(!) life / and maybe life beyond the THREE - ?[3], and, uh, uh, uh, er ... ha![3], and where was I?! / I forget, man ... you dig?[3], and

Vikram Kumar wants the TT Long-Short Focus fund all to himself

Vikram Kumar? Have you heard of Vikram Kumar, dear reader(s)? I have. [Er ... about five minutes ago.] Apparently, he's a fund manager at TT International. 'TT International, boss?' That's what I said, Voice.

TT International is a high-alpha specialist, offering a range of long-only and hedge fund strategies designed to meet clients' investment objectives. Founded in 1988, it has over 20 years' experience of conviction investing for a globally diverse institutional client base.

They're based in London, too. 'Nice.' And it's their fund, this TT Long-Short Focus thing. But Mr Kumar is going to take it away from them. 'Oh, how do the TT guys feel about this?' They don't mind. They're going to have a stake in it. All's well that ends well. They're one of these firms with a philosophy ...

We believe that best decisions result when respected professionals are encouraged to constructively challenge each other's ideas but where an individual accepts ultimate accountability for a portfolio and its performance.

You see? [Does that make sense?] Our Vikram is going to take the most ultimate accountability of all. I can only wish him the very best of luck. 'Has he burnt his boats?' Oh, I hope so, Voice. And I imagine he will be taking massive action when he launches his new firm. Like me, yesterday. 'You, yesterday?' Yes. 'What did you do yesterday?' Well, when I realized my new guitar strings weren't up to the job of recording my song - my precious best song - I immediately went on to Amazon and ordered an even better and more expensive set of strings with the special one-day delivery service. 'That's hardly in the same league as Vikram, Mikey.' Hang on a minute, man! The old me would have spent days worrying about the strings and wondering what to do. Should I buy some new expensive strings? Should I stick with the strings I've got? Maybe they'll sound better after I've played them a bit. But - NO, man! I took massive action (for me).

...

Anything else? Politics? 'Christ!' Oh, Christ! I don't want to write about the referendum BECAUSE(!) ... the whole thing fucking sickens me, frankly. However, Polly Toynbee in the Guardian says she wants her country back. And I have to agree with her, you know? Let's get back to being [reasonably] civilized, normal, calm. The way we were only a few weeks ago. I don't want to see this country changed beyond all recognition by a man who would be better off running the membership committee of some provincial golf club. 'A golf club in the 1950s, too.' Yeah. / And that's my last word on the matter.

Monday, 20 June 2016

[No. 424] Burn your boats!

The boats of your mind, yeah?

And, please, don't be afraid[1], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![1], and, please, don't be afraid[2], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![1], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![2], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![1], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![2], and I can't even swim![1], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![2], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[1], and I can't even swim![2], and it's all in the mind[1], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[2], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![1], and it's all in the mind[2], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[1], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[1], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[2], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[2], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[1], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[2], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[1], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[2], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[1], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[2], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[1], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[2], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[1], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[2], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[1], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[2], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[1], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[2], and ... ha![1], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[2], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[1], and ... ha![2], and, please, don't be afraid[3], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[2], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![3], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![3], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![3], and I can't even swim![3], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[3], and it's all in the mind[3], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![3], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[3], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[3], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[3], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[3], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[3], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[3], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[3], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[3], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[3], and ... ha![3], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[3], and

And, please, don't be afraid[1], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![1], and, please, don't be afraid[2], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![1], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![2], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![1], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![2], and I can't even swim![1], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![2], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[1], and I can't even swim![2], and it's all in the mind[1], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[2], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![1], and it's all in the mind[2], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[1], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[1], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[2], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[2], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[1], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[2], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[1], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[2], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[1], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[2], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[1], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[2], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[1], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[2], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[1], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[2], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[1], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[2], and ... ha![1], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[2], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[1], and ... ha![2], and, please, don't be afraid[3], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[2], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![3], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![3], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![3], and I can't even swim![3], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[3], and it's all in the mind[3], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![3], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[3], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[3], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[3], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[3], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[3], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[3], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[3], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[3], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[3], and ... ha![3], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[3], and

And, please, don't be afraid[1], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![1], and, please, don't be afraid[2], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![1], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![2], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![1], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![2], and I can't even swim![1], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![2], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[1], and I can't even swim![2], and it's all in the mind[1], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[2], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![1], and it's all in the mind[2], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[1], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[1], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[2], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[2], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[1], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[2], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[1], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[2], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[1], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[2], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[1], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[2], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[1], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[2], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[1], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[2], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[1], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[2], and ... ha![1], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[2], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[1], and ... ha![2], and, please, don't be afraid[3], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[2], and tell yourself that your future has no boats in it / I want to see them in flames, man![3], and I'm so cut off now, so: DEATH OR GLORY!!![3], and I don't know what your problem is ... / I'm just saying that you don't want to go BACK![3], and I can't even swim![3], and there's no glory for the little people ... / You've got to have it LARGE[3], and it's all in the mind[3], and if Alexander had stayed at home, would he have seen old age? / Who cares?![3], and the DIZZY(!) life makes one brave[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ? / I actually think it helps, you know?[3], and you can follow my example - if you have the balls for it ...[3], and I'm out of reality GONE but not beyond the THREE yet ... ah I live in mad hope[3], and come on, make your move! / yes, spin, spin, spin a-ROUND until you're sick[3], and the meaning of words slips further away ...[3], and you can sit in front of the TV getting brainwashed if you want to ... BECAUSE it's your life[3], and I'm so sad that it's your life ...[3], and what are YOU(!) ... going to do?[3], and if you're confused, I wouldn't worry about it ... / I'm confused, too! / Life is confusing[3], and ... ha![3], and if you want a revolution ... you gotta get a-ROUND, my friend(s)[3], and

Maybe you should be seeking safety in gold ...

I'm not saying you should be, but maybe you should be, yeah? It's up to you, man. Personally, I'm seeking safety in baked beans. They're cheaper, and you can eat them. What's not to like? In some supermarkets you can get four cans of Heinz baked beans for £2. This time next week? £10? £20? £30? £40? Who knows?! / What I'll be doing is buying half to eat, and half to sell or trade. 'You did this before, boss, and ended up throwing most of them away.' Shut up! 'And you had baked beans on toast for a whole month. Your skin was orange by the end of it!' Shut up, you idiot!

Don't listen to him, readers(s). We've all got to take reasonable precautions. / Oh, did you see David Cameron on the special edition of Question Time last night? I don't like the guy, but I felt sorry for him. He went to Eton. He should be in Cornwall on holiday. Instead, he's being grilled live on TV by characters who are barely educated and understand absolutely nothing. 'But they have their emotions, boss!' Ha! That's all right then. I'm sure the fools who attended the Nuremberg rallies had "emotions".

I give up! / Actually, I don't. I've been working furiously on my new song all weekend. I mean, working on the recording of it, you dig? I haven't got a version I like yet, but never mind. I've burnt the boats. 'What fucking boats?!' The boats of my mind, Voice. Like Alexander. Although they were actual boats, not ... psychological boats. 'Eh? What are you going on about, Mikey?' Christ! When Alexander the Great invaded Persia, he told his army to burn all their boats. 'Oh, okay.' They were massively outnumbered, but he said to his men: "We go home in Persian ships, or we die". You see? 'Yeah, that's lovely, that is. What a way to behave!' But it worked, man.

...

Anything else? You've had it all! 'They want to know what you're listening to.' Oh. Er ... I'm listening to a few Doobie Brothers songs, for my sins. 'Jesus!' You've got to have an open mind, Voice. 'Whatever.' What a fool believes ...

Later? I'll be doing a conceptual. So, laters.

Thursday, 16 June 2016

First Names Group successfully refinances

I'm not in the mood for writing tonight. But here's the PR email I promised earlier.

First Names Group has agreed a substantial funding deal. The financial transaction was secured after a period of accelerated growth that has seen the business far surpass its five year investment plan to become one of the largest independent trust and corporate services providers in the world. 

Okay.

The new facility will be provided by Alcentra and Royal Bank of Scotland (RBS). Together, they will bring long-term sustainable financing opportunities to First Names Group which are in line with the business's future funding requirements that will support its ambitious strategic objectives. RBS has provided financing to First Names Group since its management buyout in 2012.

Okay.

Commenting on the transaction Cengiz Somay, First Names Group's Chief Executive Officer, commented: "The growth we have experienced over the last four years has been nothing short of exceptional. We have trebled in size, doubled our strategic locations and witnessed impressive organic growth rates. We have successfully bought and integrated businesses and this new financing model will facilitate our future inorganic growth. It will also provide us with the funds needed to continue to invest in our people and infrastructure, as we strive to create one of the best places to work and do business within the industry."  

That's all right.

...

Enough of finance. Enough of this week. / This country, man. It's wearing me out.

Carl Meyer has got $500 million for his Silver Rock Onshore Opportunistic Credit fund!

[Give me a moment ... / I've run out of coffee. I like tea, but not first thing in the morning with nothing to eat. Now I'm drinking tea!]

Anyway, Silver Rock. $500 million! I think it only took him a month to raise the money, too. 'Well, his mate Michael Milken has put some cash in, boss.' Yes, Voice, we don't know how much though. By the way, Mr Meyer used to run Mr Milken's family, dear reader(s). 'Er ... what do you mean, boss? He was the au pair or something?! That's crazy!' Christ! I mean, family office. I haven't woken up yet. 'Oh, okay.' Yeah, his family office.

Er ... uh, the firm is called Silver Rock Financial LP. It's based in Los Angeles. I don't know too much about it, no one does. It's a new firm, so ... 'Let's just see how things develop.' Well, I won't be keeping an eye on it, Voice. I've actually got better things to do, you know? 'Have you recorded your song yet?' Not yet, no.

I'm a bit distracted at the moment, reader(s). It's a good job I did most of my writing at the beginning of the week. I've got another PR thing, uh, email, to do tonight. 'They really should pay you for that.' Ha! No, I'm a humanitarian, man. Everything I do comes from the heart, you dig? I'm sure I'll get my reward in the afterlife.

Obviously, it goes without saying that I wish our Carl all the best with this ... Silver Rock. I imagine he knows what he's doing, anyway. Mr Milken will keep an eye on him.

...

Anything else? I ain't discussing no referendum shit again, not even if the country descends into anarchy next week. It's got nothing to do with me, man. If you spend all of your precious time thinking about politics, left-wing, right-wing, conservative, socialist, bullshit ... you ain't thinking about personal stuff, about yourself, yeah? And that suits a hell of a lot of people in this world BECAUSE ... they have NO SOUL, NO SPIRIT. Okay? I'm telling you: These losers don't have lives, they have outside interests. And anything "outside" is bullshit. Take it from me. 'Jesus, Mikey!' That's it.

Laters.

Wednesday, 15 June 2016

ClearlySo raises £1.25 million in equity as an octopus takes a major stake

Unbelievable! Has the whole world gone insane? We've got octopussies investing now! / Yes, dear reader(s), it's the Wednesday morning PR email, back by popular demand.

ClearlySo, Europe's leading impact investment bank, announced today that an octopus - believe it or not - has taken a 12.3% stake in the company as part of a £1.25 million growth funding round. The octopus, a fast-growing (it's a monster!) sea creature, will become the largest single non-human investor in the firm.

Un-fucking-believable!

The investment by the octopus comes on the heels of a series of major milestones for ClearlySo, starting the year with the largest growth capital investment in UK history for HCT Group and followed up by the crossing of the £100 million mark in total capital raised for nearly 100 clients. It also serves as further evidence that "3D investing", where social, ethical, and/or environmental impact is considered along with risk and return, is coming of age and entering the mainstream.

Yeah, whatever. I hope they know what they're doing.

...

Anything else? Oh, George Osborne is saying that there will be an emergency budget after the referendum, with £30 billion of tax rises and cuts. Sounds reasonable to me. Many MPs in his own party are saying that they will vote it down. Yeah, good luck with that, idiots! Do you think we will have a magic money tree in a "free" Great Britain? (Probably without Scotland, and maybe even Wales will leave us, who knows?!) 'Ha!' David Cameron is going to have a wonderful legacy with this referendum of his. The whole thing is a fucking joke. It could destroy this country, Leave or Remain. [Maybe I should calm down a bit. Maybe the worst won't happen, you know? Let's all calm down!!!] Jesus H. Christ! Do you know what I mean, dear reader(s)?

Tuesday, 14 June 2016

[No. 423] Will Barclays transfer some money to me?

I mean, give, of course. And I don't mind if it takes forever. I've got the whole of eternity, man!

And well, well, uh, well ...[1], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[1], and well, well, uh, well ...[2], and it's early moments yet[1], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[2], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[1], and it's early moments yet[2], and what do you want?[1], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[2], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![1], and what do you want?[2], and ... or St Ives[1], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![2], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[1], and ... or St Ives[2], and you gotta have a dream[1], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[1], and you gotta have a dream[2], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[2], and ...[1], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![2], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[1], and ...[2], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[1], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[2], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[1], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[2], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[1], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[2], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[1], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[2], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![1], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[2], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![1], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![2], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[1], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![2], and well, well, uh, well ...[3], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[2], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[3], and it's early moments yet[3], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[3], and what do you want?[3], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![3], and ... or St Ives[3], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[3], and you gotta have a dream[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[3], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![3], and ...[3], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[3], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[3], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[3], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[3], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[3], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![3], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![3], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[3], and

And well, well, uh, well ...[1], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[1], and well, well, uh, well ...[2], and it's early moments yet[1], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[2], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[1], and it's early moments yet[2], and what do you want?[1], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[2], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![1], and what do you want?[2], and ... or St Ives[1], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![2], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[1], and ... or St Ives[2], and you gotta have a dream[1], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[1], and you gotta have a dream[2], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[2], and ...[1], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![2], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[1], and ...[2], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[1], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[2], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[1], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[2], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[1], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[2], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[1], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[2], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![1], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[2], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![1], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![2], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[1], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![2], and well, well, uh, well ...[3], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[2], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[3], and it's early moments yet[3], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[3], and what do you want?[3], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![3], and ... or St Ives[3], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[3], and you gotta have a dream[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[3], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![3], and ...[3], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[3], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[3], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[3], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[3], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[3], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![3], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![3], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[3], and

And well, well, uh, well ...[1], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[1], and well, well, uh, well ...[2], and it's early moments yet[1], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[2], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[1], and it's early moments yet[2], and what do you want?[1], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[2], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![1], and what do you want?[2], and ... or St Ives[1], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![2], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[1], and ... or St Ives[2], and you gotta have a dream[1], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[1], and you gotta have a dream[2], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[2], and ...[1], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![2], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[1], and ...[2], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[1], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[2], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[1], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[2], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[1], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[2], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[1], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[2], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![1], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[2], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![1], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![2], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[1], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![2], and well, well, uh, well ...[3], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[2], and I can wait for the money, if I really have to / ... and I'm a very patient sha/man[3], and it's early moments yet[3], and let's get DIZZY(!) for a while ... until my ship comes in, and I will share with YOU(!)[3], and what do you want?[3], and Malibu ain't cheap / Do you have any idea how much beach front property costs these days?![3], and ... or St Ives[3], and getting rich? 'Ha!' ... uh, there's more chance of my getting beyond the THREE[3], and you gotta have a dream[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND because ... there's NOTHING else to do[3], and bored, bored, bored ... / ... and not the chief executive, man, no, the chairman![3], and ...[3], and if only we had a little sun, you know? / I feel so sorry for the Aviva Investors mob[3], and look out the window now: GREY SKY[3], and, oh, Barclays never promised me a rainbow, but ... / 'Thank Christ for that!!!'[3], and, yeah, I just want the cash, any cash that anybody got to spare / the country is going down, down, down[3], and look out the window now: HARD RAIN[3], and I gotta, gotta, gotta ... get away![3], and, please, don't keep me here with your sick desires, you spinning freaks!!![3], and, uh, never mind, eh? / Why fight it?[3], and