Monday 31 October 2016

[No. 460] The elixir of pop immortality

It comes to you - if you're chosen.

And the elixir ... here - ?[1], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[1], and the elixir ... here - ?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[1], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[2], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[2], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![1], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[2], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![1], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![2], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[1], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![2], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[1], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[2], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[1], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[2], and my brain is on fire![1], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[2], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[1], and my brain is on fire![2], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[1], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[2], and my third eye is on the future ...[1], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[2], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[1], and my third eye is on the future ...[2], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[1], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[2], and I've got support, man[1], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[2], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[1], and I've got support, man[2], and ... I can do anything![1], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[2], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[1], and ... I can do anything![2], and, oh ... you dig!!![1], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[2], and the elixir ... here - ?[3], and, oh ... you dig!!![2], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[3], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[3], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![3], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![3], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[3], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[3], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[3], and my brain is on fire![3], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[3], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[3], and my third eye is on the future ...[3], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[3], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[3], and I've got support, man[3], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[3], and ... I can do anything![3], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[3], and, oh ... you dig!!![3], and

And the elixir ... here - ?[1], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[1], and the elixir ... here - ?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[1], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[2], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[2], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![1], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[2], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![1], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![2], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[1], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![2], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[1], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[2], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[1], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[2], and my brain is on fire![1], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[2], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[1], and my brain is on fire![2], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[1], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[2], and my third eye is on the future ...[1], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[2], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[1], and my third eye is on the future ...[2], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[1], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[2], and I've got support, man[1], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[2], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[1], and I've got support, man[2], and ... I can do anything![1], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[2], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[1], and ... I can do anything![2], and, oh ... you dig!!![1], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[2], and the elixir ... here - ?[3], and, oh ... you dig!!![2], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[3], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[3], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![3], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![3], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[3], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[3], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[3], and my brain is on fire![3], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[3], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[3], and my third eye is on the future ...[3], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[3], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[3], and I've got support, man[3], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[3], and ... I can do anything![3], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[3], and, oh ... you dig!!![3], and

And the elixir ... here - ?[1], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[1], and the elixir ... here - ?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[1], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[2], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[2], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![1], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[2], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![1], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![2], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[1], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![2], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[1], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[2], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[1], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[2], and my brain is on fire![1], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[2], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[1], and my brain is on fire![2], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[1], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[2], and my third eye is on the future ...[1], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[2], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[1], and my third eye is on the future ...[2], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[1], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[2], and I've got support, man[1], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[2], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[1], and I've got support, man[2], and ... I can do anything![1], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[2], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[1], and ... I can do anything![2], and, oh ... you dig!!![1], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[2], and the elixir ... here - ?[3], and, oh ... you dig!!![2], and I've got it, man! / uh, just got to freeze it[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... with old sounds / but new sounds are the best[3], and the hundreds of hours, oh, the thousands of hours ... I can hardly remember, pop fan(s)[3], and the DIZZY(!) life can help you attain the unknown - or even the impossible![3], and ... faster! / Oh, Lord, give me heavier drums![3], and I'm dreaming of words of gold ... / and I've already had the astral choir of my dreams[3], and I'll spin myself beyond the THREE[3], and the buzz of electric a-ROUND your head - ? / ah, they say there's no thrill like it[3], and my brain is on fire![3], and it's not normal, no / but normal is for squares / there today and gone tomorrow, yes[3], and, well ... I'm a different GONE(!) all the time, of course[3], and my third eye is on the future ...[3], and a shaman can move from finance to pop/rock, no problem / and I've been planning my escape for years[3], and if fools don't listen, it'll cost them BIG TIME[3], and I've got support, man[3], and Jimmy is watching with interest, from the desert / Yes, I'm pretty sure of that[3], and ... I can do anything![3], and it's a new discipline, but I ain't gonna let anyone down, YOU(!) ... dig?[3], and, oh ... you dig!!![3], and

Battlebourne Capital Management - ?!

Christ! My head! 'Aspirin?' I've had some. / Uh. Cake. Yellow and pink squares ... no, no, no. / You're probably wondering what it is, dear reader(s). Well, I don't blame you. Even Google is wondering. Earlier, I typed Battlebourne Capital Management into search, and Google asked me: Did you mean Battleborn Capital Management? 'Ha!' / Er, well, no, I didn't. I meant Battlebourne Capital Management. That's why I typed it in. 'Unbelievable!' I know what I want.

Anyway, this, uh, thing, whatever you want to call it, is - 'Rover.' I'm talking about the fund. 'Oh.' Yeah, it's just a new hedge fund that is being launched (eventually, soon) by two ex-Silver Rock Financial executives, David Goldburg and Adam Scotch. 'What does Bloomberg say about them, boss?' Oh, I don't know, man. I haven't looked. 'Are you going to look?' No.

Yeah, reader(s), it's just a new hedge fund. There's nothing odd about. 'It's not scary or anything.' Er, no. 'It's Halloween!' Okay. / Dave and Adam, they're going to invest in the debt of undervalued companies, I think. 'Nice.' They want to raise $100 million first. So ... go on then, Voice! 'If wishes were horses, Mikey, beggars would ride.' Thank you, Voice. Yeah, thanks for that.

Jesus! I've got a headache/migraine this morning. A bad one. So it's a bit of a struggle, doing this. I changed the strings on my acoustic guitar on Saturday, ready for recording, like. I won't manage it today, feeling like this. [The strings are too fresh, anyway.] But I'll probably write a conceptual later. I just hope I can get a nice cheese sandwich for lunch, you know? One of those long rolls, maybe ...

New York. They're in New York. 'Who are?!' The guys. The guys with the fund. 'Oh, right.'

...

Anything else? More pills!

Thursday 27 October 2016

DataCentred announces £1 million funding package ...

Uh ... to expand openstack infrastructure as it launches browser based openstack terminal. / Well, it's computer stuff, ain't it, dear reader(s)? Barclays is mixed up in it. I don't know what's going on. Computers ain't my scene, man. 'Why are you writing about it, boss?' Because, Voice, it's the Thursday morning PR email, back by popular demand, and I've got to write about something. I didn't like the look of the other ones.

DataCentred, the UK's leading provider of OpenStack-based cloud services, is delighted to announce a £1m funding package from Barclays and existing shareholders. The funding will allow DataCentred to further expand its OpenStack infrastructure and invest in new staff. The funding package coincides with the launch of a new browser-backed OpenStack terminal, which for the first time, allows users to access an OpenStack command line interface from any web browser, including tablets and smart phones, and start creating and managing services. This new initiative will strengthen DataCentred's position as the UK's leading provider of data centre and open source processing and computer storage.

Okay. Whatever.

The DataCentred browser-based OpenStack terminal provides innovative new features, including:

A browser-based terminal which launches instantly with the necessary credentials to log-in, with no need to install or manually configure the official OpenStack client and the associated dependencies.

The terminal can be launched from any web browser including mobile devices.

With built-in support, the terminal lists commands, arguments, syntax and so on to help users learn how to create and administer services quickly.

The terminal is based on an innovative use of containers, with micro services being used to execute each command.


Well, I mean, as long as they're happy, you know? 'Ha! I'm just wondering what Dr Mike Kelly has to say about all this.' Who?! 'The big boss.' Oh yeah, of course. Big Mike. 'I mean, is he delighted, or what? You say happy, but is he delighted?' Jesus H. Christ! I should imagine he is delighted, Voice, but you never know with his sort. Let's find out ...

Dr Mike Kelly, CEO of DataCentred, said: "We are delighted to have secured this £1m funding package which will allow us to remain on the cutting edge of product development. Our DevOps team continually pushes the boundaries of product development to ensure that customers have access to pioneering technologies which allows them to manage their data requirements through the most flexible and secure means."

Yeah, he's delighted. They all are, everyone at DataCentred. So, it's quite a result then. I bet they'll be in the pub tonight. 'Tomorrow night, boss. Friday.' Oh yeah, I forgot. Thursday isn't the end of the working week for everyone.

BUT IT IS FOR ME!!! Laters.

Wednesday 26 October 2016

[No. 459] Bloomberg says ...

I ain't connected at all. But I don't give a shit.

And, well, well ... / It's eternal![1], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![1], and, well, well ... / It's eternal![2], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[1], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![2], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[1], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[2], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![1], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[2], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![1], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![2], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[1], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![2], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[1], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[2], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![1], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[2], and I'm so qualified, really[1], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![2], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![1], and I'm so qualified, really[2], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[1], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![2], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[1], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[2], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[1], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[2], and, so ...[1], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[1], and, so ...[2], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[2], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[1], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[2], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![1], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[2], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![1], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![2], and, well, well ... / It's eternal![3], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![2], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![3], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[3], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[3], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![3], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![3], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[3], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[3], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![3], and I'm so qualified, really[3], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![3], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[3], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[3], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[3], and, so ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[3], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[3], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[3], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![3], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![3], and

And, well, well ... / It's eternal![1], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![1], and, well, well ... / It's eternal![2], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[1], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![2], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[1], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[2], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![1], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[2], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![1], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![2], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[1], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![2], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[1], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[2], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![1], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[2], and I'm so qualified, really[1], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![2], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![1], and I'm so qualified, really[2], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[1], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![2], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[1], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[2], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[1], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[2], and, so ...[1], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[1], and, so ...[2], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[2], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[1], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[2], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![1], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[2], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![1], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![2], and, well, well ... / It's eternal![3], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![2], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![3], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[3], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[3], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![3], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![3], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[3], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[3], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![3], and I'm so qualified, really[3], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![3], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[3], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[3], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[3], and, so ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[3], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[3], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[3], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![3], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![3], and

And, well, well ... / It's eternal![1], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![1], and, well, well ... / It's eternal![2], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[1], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![2], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[1], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[2], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![1], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[2], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![1], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![2], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[1], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![2], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[1], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[2], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![1], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[2], and I'm so qualified, really[1], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![2], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![1], and I'm so qualified, really[2], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[1], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![2], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[1], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[2], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[1], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[2], and, so ...[1], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[1], and, so ...[2], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[2], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[1], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[2], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![1], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[2], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![1], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![2], and, well, well ... / It's eternal![3], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![2], and I ain't connected, won't ever be connected, so ... / So?![3], and I don't care what Bloomberg says, you dig? / I'm not in their world[3], and you know me, my kook(s) ... I like to fry different fish[3], and this person ... is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries, ha![3], and it's ... THE STORY OF MY COLD LIFE!!![3], and, Jesus! ... I'm sure they don't even know about financial shamanism or mystical capitalism[3], and, but, but ... but it's so HOT(!) a-ROUND here, yeah?[3], and burning, burning, burning ... / Ah, just like the old desert, astral and physical, such sweet memories![3], and I'm so qualified, really[3], and they could offer me 99 board members ... I would reject them! All of them! / I got my pride![3], and spinning, spinning, spinning ...[3], and, oh, oh ... I'm a spiritual aristocrat, a superman, a god! / You would think all that would be worth something[3], and we live in such a degraded age / ah, that's the truth, my friend(s)[3], and, so ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / The DIZZY(!) life takes the pain away[3], and what else is there, for the likes of me?[3], and I ain't crying bitter tears in no waste land[3], and a-ROUND, ah, YOU(!) ... here NOW(!) ... / and if you're not with me, babe, you're against me / THINK ON![3], and this ... is my world / and I fucking made it, man![3], and

Nick Graziano has got his Venetus Partners thing going on!

Yes, yes ... it's a new hedge fund, dear reader(s). [Uh, I think he's had it a while, our Nick, but he has seed capital now from Constellation Seeding.] And here's the really exciting thing. You won't believe this, guy(s). It's what Bloomberg says about him, about our Nick himself, yeah? 'Oh, boss. This is getting a bit old, ain't it? We all know that Bloomberg says: This person is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries.' Ha! No, Voice. You're wrong, you little idiot! 'All right, all right. It says, er ... This person is connected to 1 board members in 1 different organizations across 0 different industries.' Ha! Ha! Ha! Wrong again. How does it feel to be so wrong, Voice?

This is what Bloomberg says about Mr Nick Graziano, the founder of Venetus Partners ... This person is connected to 54 board members in 1 different organizations across 6 different industries.

YES!!! / What do you think? Voice? What do you think? Voice?! [Where is he, reader(s)?!] 'Uh, uh ...' What?! 'Boss, I'm here, I'm here ...' Okay. 'I'm just ...' Ha! You're speechless! That's what you just are, man! Speechless! 'This is fucking incredible, Mikey!' Fifty-four board members! Have we ever seen anything like it? 'Never! We've never seen anything like it.' And six different industries! 'Christ!' It's beyond belief.

Ha! 'Ha!' Ha! / Anyway, our, uh, Nick hopes to start trading next Tuesday, the beginning of November. It will all be alternative/activist stuff, apparently. And LinkedIn says that Nick has worked at Corvex Management, some FICO thing [what's that when it's at home?], Omega Advisors, uh, that FICO thing again [what the hell is FICO thing?! seriously], Sandell Asset Management, Icahn Associates, March Partners, Salomon Smith Barney, and ... er, that's it. 'Well, that's enough, boss.' Yes, Voice, it is. Our Nick has certainly been around. 'But has he been a-ROUND?' Eh? What? 'I said, has he been a-ROUND?' Er, what do you mean? 'With capitals, boss.' Oh, you mean my conceptual shit. No, Nick hasn't been a-ROUND. 'Will he be a-ROUND, later?' No. I'm writing about something else. 'Oh, okay.' Jesus!

Yeah, No. 459. Coming later, blog fan(s)!

...

Anything else? Music? I'm listening to Bleach, Nirvana's first album. / A lot of Cobain's lyrics are pretty weak. However, they seem to work with the music, strangely.

My music? I'm seriously thinking about becoming the biggest rock star in the world, like Jim Maclaine in Stardust. [Not just a songwriter. I mean ...] Let's face it, there's no competition at the moment. [Is Kanye West a rock star?] Obviously, my age is against me, but ... I reckon it's all about the [new] songs, man. You dig?

Tuesday 25 October 2016

Robin Stoakley is stepping down

Well, well ... / 'Stepping down, boss?' Yes. 'Oh dear.' It's not a bad thing, Voice. Our Robin was the managing director of UK intermediary business at Schroders, but all good things must come to an end. 'Well, it'll soon be winter. I'm sure he'll be able to get a new job shovelling snow.' What?! Don't be ridiculous! He's going to be doing something else within the business. 'Like what?' Like anything, man. He's been at Schroders for twenty-seven years. 'Wow!' Yeah. Robin can have his pick of all the top jobs. Or he might just carve out a new position for himself. 'Maybe he'll be put in charge of the Aviva Investors mob. He could get them to actually manage their funds, for once.' Ha! Be serious, Voice. Please. Come on. It would be easier herding cats. 'I suppose.' The Aviva freaks, they're rebels, son. Ain't no one ever gonna tame them. They're operating outside "square" finance. They're building the future. They're visionaries. 'Yeah? I thought they were a bunch of wasters getting drunk in Wetherspoons.' Ha! I'm sure they've got plans. 'Really?!' No, not really.

Ah, this is Bloomberg on our Robin: This person is connected to 6 board members in 1 different organizations across 1 different industries. / Six board members! 'Impressive!' Tell me about it!

Robin, mate, if you're reading this, you're doing great. Keep on rockin' in the free world!

...

Anything else, dear reader(s)? Music? I'm listening to Is This It. The debut album from The Strokes. Real rockin'. It's good, and I like it. However, I think the band is absurdly overrated. Especially by the NME. They reckon that Last Nite is the fifth greatest song ever. 'Ha!' Yeah, before any Beatles, Dylan, Stones, or Bowie song. / Obviously, musical taste is subjective, but some people really like to take the piss.

My music? I don't do updates no more, man. 'Oh, please, Mikey. Go on.' Oh, all right. Just for you, Voice, because you're such a big fan and all. Well ... I'm just rehearsing. 'Oh.' I ain't got nothing else to say. My new songs are on a much higher level, and I want my performances to be on a higher level, too. / Also, I'm a bit nervous about recording again. I like to put it off. It's like going to the dentist.

What else? Er ... nothing else. Laters, reader(s). Bye!

Monday 24 October 2016

[No. 458] Ah, my little flowers ...

Oh yes! Some of you, so soft. I will care for you.

And I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[1], and it's a cold, cold world[1], and I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[2], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[1], and it's a cold, cold world[2], and ... where's the hard rain?[1], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[2], and in here, ha![1], and ... where's the hard rain?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[1], and in here, ha![2], and you don't want to get upset[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[2], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[1], and you don't want to get upset[2], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![1], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[2], and ... my garden of financiers![1], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![2], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[1], and ... my garden of financiers![2], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[1], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[2], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[1], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[2], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![1], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[2], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[1], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![2], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[1], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[2], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[1], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[2], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[1], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[2], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[1], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[2], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![1], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[2], and I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[3], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![2], and it's a cold, cold world[3], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[3], and ... where's the hard rain?[3], and in here, ha![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[3], and you don't want to get upset[3], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[3], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![3], and ... my garden of financiers![3], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[3], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[3], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[3], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![3], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[3], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[3], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[3], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[3], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[3], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![3], and

And I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[1], and it's a cold, cold world[1], and I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[2], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[1], and it's a cold, cold world[2], and ... where's the hard rain?[1], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[2], and in here, ha![1], and ... where's the hard rain?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[1], and in here, ha![2], and you don't want to get upset[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[2], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[1], and you don't want to get upset[2], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![1], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[2], and ... my garden of financiers![1], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![2], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[1], and ... my garden of financiers![2], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[1], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[2], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[1], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[2], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![1], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[2], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[1], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![2], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[1], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[2], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[1], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[2], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[1], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[2], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[1], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[2], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![1], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[2], and I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[3], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![2], and it's a cold, cold world[3], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[3], and ... where's the hard rain?[3], and in here, ha![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[3], and you don't want to get upset[3], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[3], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![3], and ... my garden of financiers![3], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[3], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[3], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[3], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![3], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[3], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[3], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[3], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[3], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[3], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![3], and

And I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[1], and it's a cold, cold world[1], and I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[2], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[1], and it's a cold, cold world[2], and ... where's the hard rain?[1], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[2], and in here, ha![1], and ... where's the hard rain?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[1], and in here, ha![2], and you don't want to get upset[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[2], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[1], and you don't want to get upset[2], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![1], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[2], and ... my garden of financiers![1], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![2], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[1], and ... my garden of financiers![2], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[1], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[2], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[1], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[2], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![1], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[2], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[1], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![2], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[1], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[2], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[1], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[2], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[1], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[2], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[1], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[2], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![1], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[2], and I am here to protect YOU(!), my little flower(s)[3], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![2], and it's a cold, cold world[3], and there are MONSTERS(!) out there! / So, you better stay a-ROUND, you dig?[3], and ... where's the hard rain?[3], and in here, ha![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'll spin you beyond caring about any shit[3], and you don't want to get upset[3], and I can't promise you life beyond the THREE, uh, not just yet, man / 'You'll have to bear with him'[3], and I can care ... when I have to / Jesus![3], and ... my garden of financiers![3], and I got a cactus, you know? / Oh, it's good to me / Definitely not a gold digger ...[3], and I don't want to break your soul ... / I just want to take a look / Is that okay?[3], and something like those mushrooms, maybe[3], and it's the DIZZY(!) life you need ... to make you tougher / so, a-ROUND, yes![3], and don't look for any sense at all! Christ! Seriously / ‘Ha! The classic mistake, boss'[3], and remember: words can't hurt you if they have no meaning[3], and we've got to destroy the meaning a-ROUND here ... / When will you understand?[3], and this ... should all be pretty basic stuff by now, my mystic kook(s)[3], and one day a real rain will hit YOU(!) hard, and you will ... grow! / It won't be that bad[3], and, COME ON(!!!), please ... cheer up, yeah?![3], and

Who is Nick Lyster?!

Well, well ... I'm sure he's someone, you know? Because I believe, totally. / It's difficult these days to find out who people are. Who is anyone? Who am I? 'I blame LinkedIn, boss. They won't let you see shit now unless you sign in.' Well, it means that I'll probably have to join again - when I can be bothered. For the time being though ... we have Bloomberg. 'Christ!' Yeah. Sorry.

This person is connected to 0 Board Members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries.

Oh dear. Dear oh dear oh dear. 'Ha! Why do you bother, boss?' I don't know, Voice. I just don't know. I was reading about Suresh Singh, see. 'Who?!' Our Suresh, man. Mr Singh. He's been named as head of funds distribution for Asia at, uh, Principal Global Investors. 'Oh.' And he's reporting to this Nick Lyster character, who is the global head of wealth advisory services. 'Well, that's something, Mikey. You know his job title.' You can't judge a man by his job title. I want to see into his soul!!! 'But why? Why?!' Ah, I don't know why. It's an obsession with me, ain't it? Who are these people I write about? GOD HELP ME!!! / And you have to be so careful, not like a bull in cyberspace. Most of them will be big, rough, tough characters. And that's great. Others are like, er ... fragile flowers. 'And you never know which one you will get.' I still have my instincts! I get it right most of the time ...

Mr. Nicholas Lyster, also known as Nick, serves as the Global Head of Wealth Advisory Services at Principal Global Investors (Europe) Limited. Mr. Lyster is responsible for delivering the firm's investment capabilities to global wealth management firms, with a focus on the firm's Dublin-domiciled Ucits range of funds. He previously served as the Chief Executive Officer at the firm from 2006 to 2016.

Some more Bloomberg! A bit better. / Well ... [Oh, I had to correct Bloomberg's punctuation. Never mind, eh?] Ha! Also known as Nick ... 'But you knew that, boss!' He's always been "Nick" to me, Voice, and he always will be.

...

Jesus H. Christ! What is the point of this post, exactly? Answers on a postcard, please. The old-fashioned way. / I'm a bit confused this morning. Yes, yes, yes. I'm not making a lot of sense. I hope that YOU(!) ... can understand. Please!

Laters.

Wednesday 19 October 2016

[No. 457] We know what Kumar Palghat will be!

He will be the global head of fixed income at Janus Henderson Global Investors.

And ... can YOU(!) dig it?[1], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[1], and ... can YOU(!) dig it?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![1], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[2], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![2], and, kooks ... say his name three times![1], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![1], and, kooks ... say his name three times![2], and, oh, hello![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![2], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[1], and, oh, hello![2], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[1], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[2], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[1], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[2], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[1], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[2], and wretched words, and their sounds[1], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[2], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[1], and wretched words, and their sounds[2], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![1], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[2], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[1], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![2], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[1], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[2], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[1], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[2], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[1], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[2], and let go, and close your eyes[1], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[2], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[1], and let go, and close your eyes[2], and ... just ask Rimbaud![1], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[2], and ... can YOU(!) dig it?[3], and ... just ask Rimbaud![2], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![3], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[3], and, kooks ... say his name three times![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![3], and, oh, hello![3], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[3], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[3], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[3], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[3], and wretched words, and their sounds[3], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[3], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![3], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[3], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[3], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[3], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[3], and let go, and close your eyes[3], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[3], and ... just ask Rimbaud![3], and

And ... can YOU(!) dig it?[1], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[1], and ... can YOU(!) dig it?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![1], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[2], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![2], and, kooks ... say his name three times![1], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![1], and, kooks ... say his name three times![2], and, oh, hello![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![2], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[1], and, oh, hello![2], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[1], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[2], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[1], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[2], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[1], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[2], and wretched words, and their sounds[1], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[2], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[1], and wretched words, and their sounds[2], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![1], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[2], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[1], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![2], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[1], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[2], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[1], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[2], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[1], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[2], and let go, and close your eyes[1], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[2], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[1], and let go, and close your eyes[2], and ... just ask Rimbaud![1], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[2], and ... can YOU(!) dig it?[3], and ... just ask Rimbaud![2], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![3], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[3], and, kooks ... say his name three times![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![3], and, oh, hello![3], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[3], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[3], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[3], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[3], and wretched words, and their sounds[3], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[3], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![3], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[3], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[3], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[3], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[3], and let go, and close your eyes[3], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[3], and ... just ask Rimbaud![3], and

And ... can YOU(!) dig it?[1], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[1], and ... can YOU(!) dig it?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![1], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[2], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![2], and, kooks ... say his name three times![1], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![1], and, kooks ... say his name three times![2], and, oh, hello![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![2], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[1], and, oh, hello![2], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[1], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[2], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[1], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[2], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[1], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[2], and wretched words, and their sounds[1], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[2], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[1], and wretched words, and their sounds[2], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![1], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[2], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[1], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![2], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[1], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[2], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[1], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[2], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[1], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[2], and let go, and close your eyes[1], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[2], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[1], and let go, and close your eyes[2], and ... just ask Rimbaud![1], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[2], and ... can YOU(!) dig it?[3], and ... just ask Rimbaud![2], and he knows, yes, our Kumar knows ... what he will be[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and the others know nothing at all / They must be so happy![3], and if he were here, ah, is he here - ? ... he would know very little about anything[3], and, kooks ... say his name three times![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... and it's magic time![3], and, oh, hello![3], and Kumar, my friend, come on ... merge your consciousness with mine ... ness, ness[3], and the cosmos is waiting for us to act[3], and no one knows the future, so ... why get upset about a merger that may never happen?[3], and, oh ... not our merger, man ... / ...that is definitely on the cards[3], and wretched words, and their sounds[3], and, uh, it's nothing sordid / you see, one day we will all merge with the cosmos[3], and consciousness ness is a funny thing, ha![3], and I know, I know, I know ... who I am! / and who are YOU(!) ... ? ... ? ... ?[3], and there are mysteries a-ROUND[3], and we're all going NOW(!) ... as fast as we can ... until we are utterly GONE(!), yeah?[3], and hold on tight ... to your sanity? / 'Ha!' No, no, no[3], and let go, and close your eyes[3], and we might fall asleep and wake up beyond the THREE / stranger things have happened at sea[3], and ... just ask Rimbaud![3], and

Kumar Palghat will be the global head of fixed income

Yeah, when it's all, uh ... merged and that, I suppose. 'Eh? When what is all merged and that, boss?' Oh, that ... that ... that Janus Henderson Global Investors thing, Voice, you know? 'So our Kumar will have a new job then?' Er ... 'What firm is he leaving?' Well, he's already working at Janus Capital, so ... I don't really understand what's going on. 'Oh dear. What's his job title at the moment?' Ha! How would I know? I can tell you that he's mixed up in some ETF nonsense. But it's all very confusing, man. And I've got BAD VIBES(!!!). I hope this merger isn't going to be an UTTER DISASTER(!!!). 'Why would it be?' Well, I can see employees of the new firm doing the same job, I mean, two in the same job, or ... not doing any job, or having ... maybe the same title but different jobs, or having no title at all, just being totally fucking ... lost, yeah? 'Oh.' It will be a golden opportunity for wasters. You could just sit in the basement all day, playing cards and drinking, collecting your pay check every month. [Like Aviva Investors, sort of.] No one will know who you are or what you're supposed to be doing. 'Will it be that bad?' It's going to be a nightmare. That's my prediction. And I'm rarely wrong about these things.

Well, at least our Kumar will have a clue. 'Will Bloomberg have a clue, boss?' Judge for yourself, Voice -

This person is connected to 0 Board Members in 0 different organizations across 1 different industries.

'Ha!' That won't change. Bloomberg will never change. / However, the Janus website says -

Kumar Palghat is a member of the Janus Global Macro Fixed Income leadership team, a position he has held since 2015. Mr. Palghat is a founder of Kapstream, a Janus subsidiary, where he serves as Managing Director and Chief Investment Officer. He is also Portfolio Manager of the Kapstream Absolute Return Income strategy. From 2001 through 2006, prior to forming Kapstream, Mr. Palghat was based in Sydney as Head of Asia Pacific Portfolio Management for PIMCO. He joined PIMCO in 1997 and served as one of its first Global Portfolio Managers in its Newport Beach, California headquarters. From 1988 through 1997, Mr. Palghat was a Senior Investment Officer at The World Bank, in Washington D.C., where he was part of a team managing fixed income portfolios. Mr. Palghat randomly appears in local media as an expert on global bond markets and is a regular speaker at conferences and seminars. During his tenures at PIMCO and Kapstream, Mr. Palghat and his teams have received various industry accolades and recognition.

Which is, er, great, obviously, but ... but ... but ... Jesus H. Christ! 'That's just Janus Capital, not Janus Henderson Global Investors.' Exactly! Thank you, Voice. It will all be different after the merger, if it actually goes ahead.

Anyway, I'll be taking Mr Palghat for a spin in No. 457 later. Let's see if I can make things even worse.

Tuesday 18 October 2016

Auxo Investment Partners - ?!

All right, all right! Don't get upset, dear reader(s). It's just a new private equity firm, that's all. [Greek goddess?! Whatever.] Over in America. Michigan or something. Apparently, Auxo wants to raise $50 million. 'If wishes were horses ...' Shut up, you idiot! / 'Who's founded it then, boss?' Oh, only Jeff Helminski, Jack Kolodny, and Fred Tedori, man! 'Wow! / Er ... who are they?' I have absolutely no idea, Voice. And that's the problem. I mean, LinkedIn is the problem. 'Why?' Well, unless you sign in now, LinkedIn won't let you look at more than one profile. 'Well, boss, sign in then.' No. I'm not a member any more. And even if I was ... 'What?' It doesn't matter. I was just happy with the way things were. 'Times change, man.' Yeah.

Anyway, dear reader(s), this means we have to rely on ... Bloomberg. 'Oh shit!' Exactly. This is what Bloomberg says about Jeff Helminski -

This person is connected to 2 Board Members in 2 different organizations across 2 different industries.

'Brilliant!' Ha! / And this is what Bloomberg says about Jack Kolodny -

This person is connected to 1 Board Members in 1 different organizations across 1 different industries.

'That's just great, ain't it?' Yeah. 'Okay. And what does Bloomberg say about the other guy?' What other guy? 'Fred Tedori.' It doesn't say anything about him. 'Oh dear. Mikey, come on!' It's not my fault, man. I guess some finance guys are popular and some ain't. There's nothing I can do about it.

By the way, dear reader(s), Mr Helminski and Mr Kolodny were executives at Blackford Capital. That's where they met and ... 'Fell in love?' No! WTF?! [Well, maybe ... it doesn't bother me, you know?] Became friends, Voice. And started planning their escape, no doubt. Jesus! 'And what about Mr Tedori?' Christ! No one knows anything about him, so leave it.

...

That's enough finance, surely? For a cold and foggy Tuesday morning in winter. What else? Anything else?

Music? I'm listening to Billy Idol, his best stuff. There's no harm in it. White Wedding is still really cool. / Guitar? My Yamaha FS50BT strings are still sounding pretty good after about 130/140 hours. [I'll have to put on a new set soon for recording.] The D'Addario and Martin strings I was using before went bad after forty hours. 'They weren't top of the range ones though, Mikey.' I know, I know. I'm just saying.

Monday 17 October 2016

[No. 456] Always spinning in the same conceptual

Well, these conceptuals all feel the same, you dig?

And, yes ... a-ROUND again[1], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[1], and, yes ... a-ROUND again[2], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![1], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[2], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[1], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![2], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[1], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[2], and ... ness[1], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[1], and ... ness[2], and I spin, now[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[2], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[1], and I spin, now[2], and you can drive[1], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[2], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[1], and you can drive[2], and COME and GO![1], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[2], and how high will we get? / No. ...[1], and COME and GO![2], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[1], and how high will we get? / No. ...[2], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![1], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[2], and smash into a wall, of God[1], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![2], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[1], and smash into a wall, of God[2], and ... good, eh?[1], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[2], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[1], and ... good, eh?[2], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![1], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[2], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[1], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![2], and it's building up, I believe ...[1], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[2], and before I go ... ha![1], and it's building up, I believe ...[2], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![1], and before I go ... ha![2], and, yes ... a-ROUND again[3], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![2], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[3], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![3], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[3], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[3], and ... ness[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[3], and I spin, now[3], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[3], and you can drive[3], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[3], and COME and GO![3], and how high will we get? / No. ...[3], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[3], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![3], and smash into a wall, of God[3], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[3], and ... good, eh?[3], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[3], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![3], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[3], and it's building up, I believe ...[3], and before I go ... ha![3], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![3], and

And, yes ... a-ROUND again[1], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[1], and, yes ... a-ROUND again[2], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![1], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[2], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[1], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![2], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[1], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[2], and ... ness[1], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[1], and ... ness[2], and I spin, now[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[2], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[1], and I spin, now[2], and you can drive[1], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[2], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[1], and you can drive[2], and COME and GO![1], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[2], and how high will we get? / No. ...[1], and COME and GO![2], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[1], and how high will we get? / No. ...[2], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![1], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[2], and smash into a wall, of God[1], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![2], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[1], and smash into a wall, of God[2], and ... good, eh?[1], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[2], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[1], and ... good, eh?[2], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![1], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[2], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[1], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![2], and it's building up, I believe ...[1], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[2], and before I go ... ha![1], and it's building up, I believe ...[2], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![1], and before I go ... ha![2], and, yes ... a-ROUND again[3], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![2], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[3], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![3], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[3], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[3], and ... ness[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[3], and I spin, now[3], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[3], and you can drive[3], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[3], and COME and GO![3], and how high will we get? / No. ...[3], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[3], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![3], and smash into a wall, of God[3], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[3], and ... good, eh?[3], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[3], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![3], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[3], and it's building up, I believe ...[3], and before I go ... ha![3], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![3], and

And, yes ... a-ROUND again[1], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[1], and, yes ... a-ROUND again[2], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![1], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[2], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[1], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![2], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[1], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[2], and ... ness[1], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[1], and ... ness[2], and I spin, now[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[2], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[1], and I spin, now[2], and you can drive[1], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[2], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[1], and you can drive[2], and COME and GO![1], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[2], and how high will we get? / No. ...[1], and COME and GO![2], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[1], and how high will we get? / No. ...[2], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![1], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[2], and smash into a wall, of God[1], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![2], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[1], and smash into a wall, of God[2], and ... good, eh?[1], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[2], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[1], and ... good, eh?[2], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![1], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[2], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[1], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![2], and it's building up, I believe ...[1], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[2], and before I go ... ha![1], and it's building up, I believe ...[2], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![1], and before I go ... ha![2], and, yes ... a-ROUND again[3], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![2], and every chance, every chance that I get ... I'm here, waiting for something to happen[3], and Jasmine? / Who the fuck is Jasmine?![3], and inside my mind again, up and down, left and right, always spinning with the same consciousness[3], and ... DON'T PEEP!!! / Oh, I'm shy ...[3], and ... ness[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / and I'm always too DIZZY(!) to care much about much[3], and I spin, now[3], and when YOU(!) are here ... I can see inside your mind/soul ... ah, whatever, whatever you got[3], and you can drive[3], and what you got? / ... a-ROUND with me, yes[3], and COME and GO![3], and how high will we get? / No. ...[3], and faster or slower, man, it don't matter ... NOW, NOW, NOW(!!!)[3], and a-ROUND, yes, yes, YES(!) - ![3], and smash into a wall, of God[3], and my consciousness ness will be all over you, baby, uh, shattered words and sounds[3], and ... good, eh?[3], and, uh, uh, uh, hey, yes, I know ... / Ah, I've got self-awareness like you won't believe[3], and it's all the same, all the time / and there are hundreds, thousands, on the way![3], and bored? / I'm too GONE(!) to be bored, son/daughter[3], and it's building up, I believe ...[3], and before I go ... ha![3], and there must be peace beyond the THREE - a place we will never return from![3], and

Dipankar Shewaram has got a new job at Odey Asset Management!

Yippee! 'Is Dip a fund manager, boss?' Of course he is, Voice. He used to work at BlueBay Asset Management, and various other firms. 'Nice.' He's going to be managing the Odey Odyssey fund with our Tim. 'Our Tim?' Yes! Our Tim.

Oh, I'm sure we all remember Tim Bond ...

If you were alone, one night [ain't it always the nights? life is so easy in the daytime], in an attic or a cellar, and you were offered a companion, to help you make it through that night, wouldn't you choose Tim Bond, if I weren't available? Think about it. I want you to seriously think about it. You have some insight into his character now, so wouldn't you choose him? Forget about me. I could be indisposed. Incommunicado, maybe. It does happen. I'm sure you would choose Tim. And he wouldn't let you down.

Yeah? 'Oh, okay.' I think Dipankar Shewaram is going to be all right with our Tim. I mean, like a house on fire or something. 'What about Crispin?' Let's not talk about Crispin, please.

Dear reader(s), we don't want to talk about Crispin, all right? Let him fly away in his beautiful balloon. We don't care!

...

Anything else? On a Monday morning? In winter? Are you serious? 'I think they're serious, boss.' Jesus H. Christ!

Music? I'm listening to Low by David Bowie. It's the way I'm feeling, you dig? I suppose I should be listening to Bob Dylan going on about that apple suckling tree, seeing as he won the Nobel Prize last week, but I'm not in the mood.

Always Crashing in the Same Car is a good song. It's giving me ideas for No. 456.

Bowie's record company, RCA, didn't want him to release this album. An executive even offered to buy him a mansion if he would record Young Americans Part II. 'Ha!' Ha!

...

What else? Brexit? 'Ha!' Ha! / Prices are going up. 'That's reality.' A lot of people don't like reality. 'Tough.' Banks might be leaving London. 'Reality strikes again, boss!' Well, our government says everything is going to be all right. 'Ah, fantasy!' We will thrive in the sunlit uplands! / Aliens, abduct me!

Thursday 13 October 2016

Upstart indexer challenges benchmark huge or monstrous creatures!

Well, well ... / Yes, dear reader(s), it's the Thursday morning PR email - back by popular demand - and the last post of the week. Something about big monsters, believe it or not. 'I don't believe it, boss.' Well, you better believe it, idiot. Behemoths. 'What?!' Christ! Upstart indexer challenges benchmark behemoths. 'Oh, that's a bit different, ain't it? Not what you were saying before.' Ha! Chill out, man! Can't I have a laugh, Voice?

Hi Michael, today, S-Network Global Indexes, a provider of proprietary and custom indexes serving ETFs and other financial products with over $5 billion in AUM, announced the release of an extensive equity benchmark suite covering the US, Europe, Pacific, Developed, and Emerging Market regions.

'Who is that, talking?' Ha! You're not the only voice, Voice. You've got competition!

New York, NY, October 12, 2016 - S-Network Global Indexes, Inc. today announced a new suite of nearly 70 benchmark indexes. The suite includes equity benchmarks covering US, Europe, Pacific, Developed, and Emerging Market regions, complete with sector sub-indexes.

'It's all deja vu shit, Mikey! Get on with it!' All right. Bear with me, reader(s).

The US series also groups by market capitalization, and growth vs. value styles. The equity benchmarks include only operating companies; REITs and MLPs are represented in separate benchmarks under the Alternative Investment category.

'Yeah, yeah.'

"We're pleased to help fulfil a need in the market for low cost, 100% rules-based indexes that are supported by accurate historical price and constituent-level data," said Joseph LaCorte, co-founder and CEO of S-Network Global Indexes. "The indexes provide unprecedented levels of transparency and utility and may be used as the underlying universes for 'smart beta' indexes, performance benchmarking, and institutional investment. Significantly, the S-Net benchmark family offers methodologies that for the first time are consistent across geographic regions, capitalization groupings, selection criteria and weighting formulae."

That's Joe, that is. Talking, like. 'I know.'

The new S-Network suite of benchmarks highly correlate to comparable major benchmarks while offering improvements at the global level. The new family of interlocking, complementary indexes form a methodologically consistent whole without sacrificing correlation with comparable major benchmarks. Time series comparisons are available in S-Network’s interactive index comparison tool.

'Who's that, then?' I don't know, man.

"There has long been a need among institutional investors for a comprehensive family of benchmark indexes that are fair, open, transparent and, most importantly, low cost," said Herbert Blank, S-Network's head of business development.

Ah, Herbie, of course. 'Of course. Where's Pat?'

The S-Network Global Benchmarking System features daily constituent files and index values for price, total return, and net total return variants in USD and Euro from December 31, 1999. The data will be available via S-Network's FTP, as well as most major data providers.

'For fuck's sake! That ain't our Pat!' Hang on, Voice.

"An important use for these indexes is in the burgeoning smart beta space, where strong demand exists for fully cleansed data that has been aggregated into logical sets," said Patrick Shaddow, S-Network's Director of Index Development.

You see? 'Yeah. Thanks.' You're welcome.

...

Well, well ... / So, it's all done, yeah? My duty. I've done my duty for another week. 'What about all the other PR emails you've been sent in the last few days, boss?' Give me a break! Please! I'm exhausted.

Anything else? Music? I'm listening to Eric Clapton, the Beano album. I've been neglecting my lead guitar practice lately. 'Why?!' Jesus! Writing new songs, man. There are only so many hours in the day. I can't do everything.

Lunch? 'Cheese sandwich?' I don't know yet. Tesco might not even have any fucking food on the shelves ...

Well, have a nice weekend, reader(s). Laters.