Wednesday, 21 December 2011

So close to salvation

Round, and round, and round. Oh, pigs. We're fucking pigs. And this isn't the first time. It's like a curse. It's like a nightmare in a dream factory. But don't get upset. It's only a bit of fun. / I, I can be so close - I am so close - to salvation, if I choose. Oh, it seems but is not: impossible. We all can - we all are, I - if we choose. Let's choose! Have we the wills? You (we!) I, I, I ... gotta make a choice, anytime soon! Sometimes there's ... lots of choices, far too many. / Life or death! Love or hate! Is it true? And ... / Ain't no need for no Jesus. No! And there ain't no need for no priest. We, I, I let go, now, oh, we can! Because this is personal, for us. But not for Him. I have to say, God doesn't have a personality. You'll be glad to hear. I am glad to say it, to write it. God doesn't have a personality. Yes! Can you hear? Can you read? [Can I jump in here? Again, and again, and again ... going round, in, and out ...] Ah ... He doesn't have an ego like the devil ... [ol' red eyes is back!] / uh, devil, we ... are the devil, sometimes. We've got to be aware of the devil. Open your eyes! So blue, an ocean of pain. 'Mine eyes have seen ...' / There are no rules. Only, yes, only the rules we make for ourselves. There are no rules in the sky - up there! Only the rules on earth that we make, not our masters. We are free. Hard to believe, I know, when we see the chains, but they're an illusion - if only we knew. / If only we could really see ...

It's money ... ? /

Money, yes. It is. Afraid so. [So, am I afraid?] Ah. It's a secret. / No! Er ... / Money (is funny, ha, oh) ... it takes, it breaks, no ... it makes - the world go ... round / round / round. / And a ... round / I am a/round in, here, hello, and a/round on, and round with, your dizzy head, so dizzy soul, a/round with you, so ooo into y ooo u - ah! It's so ooo ooo intimate. / [I wrote about the devil again, right here, and it disappeared, I can't remember, er: 'Like the devil, really like the devil' or something, then it disappeared.] (Into the darkness? No, not that dramatically.) [I ...] / So, come on, come dance with me in hell, well? / Oh, it's a confusing time, for sure. And ... all the time, it comes and goooooeees. There's no knowing where it comes from [and I shut my eyes, tight] or where it goes to ooo. I know you see, yes, you know, I, we're round and round, so dizzy, so into each other (and salvation? - if we can get it.) Together, we are, up there, we go, down, we go, round and round, up and up, and we, down and down, and deeper, and lower, and up, oh, we're higher than we've ever been! / No angels here though - way up there(!), that's too high, only for angels, untouchable, unfortunately ... / So, give me the vision, right now, I want ... and not any old vision: I want the vision that changes consciousness and kills all the pain we get, I ... I've paid the price, over and over, I've been isolated, I've cried in the desert, so [Lord?] give me the vision that 'I' deserve. Man, I'm a real outsider, so give me the real outside. / It's like outta space - out there(!), so, I gotta get outta here, all stuffed with demons! (They think they're writers, for Christ's sake!) Let's put it together, this, hungry for ... one vision from fragments, images in my head. Oh, one goddamn clear sight of it, that's all I'm asking for, in the pit, no, not in the pit [my fate?] Just one philosophy from voices in the night, children. We are dancing, yes, it's the time(?), that time, the only time, I ... / And there must be a reason! Surely? Yes? No? Just, oh, like there's a way? We wouldn't have a way without a reason! Ha! That wouldn't make any sense at all. Er ... / [So ...] / Focus! Please. We're going somewhere to escape. This ain't paradise. (Oh, you've noticed?) The awful mess, it's crushing us, and ... we can't breathe, I, there's too much misery, too much fear, too much hassle, we're having the life crushed out of us, like (we are!) dirty pigs in a hole, those cold bodies in a mass grave, already dead, so ... well, it's all gone, then, in that case.

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Right, that's it for this year. I hope you have a nice Christmas. I'll be back on Tuesday 3rd January.

My New Year’s resolution? I'm going to give up writing - literature - to become one of these c**ting finance professionals I've heard so much about - ha!

No, seriously, I'll be back on the third.