Jesus H. - !!! I haven't got any mince pies in. I haven't got any Stellas or Kronenbourgs. It's just going to have to be a last minute rush, I suppose. 'Boss.' What, Voice? 'What the hell are you going on about?' It's nearly Christmas. 'No it's not. It's July. We're in the middle of bloody summer!' Ha! Not according to Jinksy. 'Oh, Christ.' Ha, ha, ha!
Brexit cancels Christmas for Amazon sellers
Post-Brexit, Amazon is booting sellers using UK warehouses out of its European services. But ParcelHero warns that Amazon could stop sending UK sellers' products to EU centres early to avoid a red tape returns nightmare after Christmas.
Okay, okay. It's a PR email, dear reader(s), from our Jinksy. 'The guy's nuts.' He's eccentric, Voice, come on. He's all right.
This week, Amazon has officially acknowledged that all its sellers who only use a UK Fulfilment Centre will no longer have access to its EU marketplace from 1 January. UK sellers using Fulfilment by Amazon (FBA) will be forced to ship their goods to an EU-based Fulfilment Centre or lose all European sales.
The international courier services expert ParcelHero warns sellers who take no action or decide not to send stock to an EU centre could find Amazon stops shipping their items to the EU even before Christmas. This would avoid a build-up of stock that will have to be returned after 1 January. ParcelHero also fears the e-commerce giant may even start the process of returning stock to the sellers' UK warehouse during December in anticipation of the end of Pan-European sales.
Okay, okay. I'm actually going through my media player at the moment, and I can't find the Phil Spector Christmas album. 'Did you delete it by mistake?' Well, I think I deleted all my CDs by mistake, didn't I? And then I didn't rip the Phil Spector one again for some reason. Never mind. 'It's a shame, boss, because we're in the mood for it now.' I know, I know. Ah, never mind, eh?
Anyway, let's hear from the great Christmas loon, uh, eccentric, himself ...
ParcelHero's Head of Consumer Research, David Jinks MILT, says: "On 1 January, the UK will leave the EU's single market and customs union. There is time for the UK and EU to agree a decent deal, but that's far from certain. Amazon has to plan its systems months ahead and has obviously opted for the worst-case scenario and decided EU and UK sales need to be kept entirely separate for now. Amazon will be highly reluctant to see a build-up of UK sellers' stock in Europe during December. That will present a red tape nightmare in January, when some stock is inevitably returned."
NOW(!) we all know that our Jinksy loves the sound of his own voice, or the look of his own words ... so this email goes on forever. But I think we get the basic idea, kook(s), which is that Brexit is still a thing, and still a bad thing. 'And let's not forget The Thing.' Yeah, there's still The Thing as well.
ENDS
...
Anything else? Obviously, I don't have a care in the world these days because of all the hypnosis. I sit cross-legged on the floor now when I do it - to stop losing consciousness, like.
Oh, I'm getting great results! It's so much better than those audiobooks. Paul McKenna tells you to visualize becoming the person you want to be, you dig? And you know what I'm like, man. I visualize all kinds of crazy shit. It's brilliant.
Laters!
