The last post of the year

Hello again, kook(s).

Okay, okay. My head is all right if ... I don't move it. My head only aches when I move it. What's that all about?!

Let's play some music ...

Nina. Ed Sheeran. / I like the chorus in this song.

It's Gettin' Better (Man!!). Oasis. / From their third album, which I hardly ever listen to. Who does? But this is upbeat, exciting, you dig?

No - !!!

Stay Young from The Masterplan is better. I'll play that instead.

You Could Be Mine. Guns N' Roses. / Like a robot or whatever it was.

I've been thinking ... it wouldn't be too bad being a terminator. If you could be reprogrammed to write songs, like.

Bad idea. Robots don't know shit.

Anyway ...

Here Am I (Come And Take Me). Al Green.

Dance Hall Days. Wang Chung. / I love this song.

Never Change. Jay-Z.

Star. David Bowie. / Enough said.

Okay, okay. I'm going to play a whole album now while I write the rest of this post.

Something that can only be played at night ...

What's that? Apollo, you say? Wrong! It's too early for Apollo.

Avalon by Roxy Music. Yes - !!!

...

I haven't played my guitar today. I might not tomorrow either. I'll be making my fresh start on Friday ... just like countless other people, ha!

Listen! If The Thing would kindly go away, maybe with a vaccine, then we could all get back to normal and I could become a rock star.

It's supposed to be The Roaring Twenties, FFS! Do you know what I mean? 'Don't worry, Mikey, it's coming. The Twenties can't roar unless we have bad times first.' Really? 'Yeah. Bad times, good times, bad times, good times ... you know the routine.' Thanks, Voice.

Oh, he should know. He was around at the death of Caesar and the birth of Christ. 'Don't! You're making me feel old.' Ha!

...

What else?

There is nothing else.

Don't act all surprised.

This post is coming to an end ...

Next year, there will be more posts.

How many? I don't know.

Laters.

Tara from Avalon is what St Ives is like at night.

Almost the last post of the year

So, uh ...

What does that mean? It means I will be writing the last post of the year later tonight - if I'm still alive.

This ... is almost the last post of the year.

I say "still alive" because I've got a migraine. I was sick this morning. I'm feeling a bit better now, but not much.

I'm watching TV while I write. I suppose I could put some music on. No! I'll put music on tonight. Let's watch The Sweeney together, dear reader(s). Can you see it? Maybe you're not in England. So? You might have astral eyes. You might be here with me now - in spirit, like. Good luck to you!

Regan and Carter are always calling women "birds". It's shocking really. Never mind.

I don't think there are any punch-ups in this episode. 'There was one at the beginning, boss.' Oh, hello, Voice. Yes, but that was just a few villains - sorry, "slags" - fighting each other. Regan and Carter are taking it easy.

Regan is having dinner with some bird now. Carter doesn't like that. He's back at the Yard, working.

Regan is getting dressed. 'Ha!' Have they cut out a scene?! Never mind.

Oh, my head.

Right. I'm going to have an After Eight mint.

I'll have a mug of tea in the minute. 'Thin White Duke?' Eh? No, Earl Grey, idiot!

The Sweeney has finished.

What's on next?

There's not much on until Gavin & Stacey at two. Four hours of it! Great! / I'll watch Blaze TV until then. Auction Hunters or something. I prefer Storage Wars, and Pawn Stars - my favourite of this type of show. Chumlee got Bob Dylan to sign an album the other week.

I've had six After Eight mints. It's okay. I'm restarting my Rock Star Diet on Friday.

Tremors in my head!

Why don't laptops allow you to really darken the screen? Do you know what I mean?

Music?

I'll discuss music later.

Life and Death will definitely be the greatest song ever.

Anyway ...

Veggie burger for dinner.

Laters!

Christ. A few minutes into Gavin & Stacey and they've already edited out "A cheeky finger". This isn't good.

[No. 865] Hypnotic visions

I see the future!

And, well, well ...[1], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[1], and, well, well ...[2], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[1], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[2], and I see ... three![1], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[2], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[1], and I see ... three![2], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[1], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[2], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[1], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[2], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![1], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[2], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![1], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![2], and I wish I didn't hear ...[1], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![2], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![1], and I wish I didn't hear ...[2], and a-ROUND ... ?[1], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![2], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![1], and a-ROUND ... ?[2], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[1], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![2], and I see ... !!![1], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[2], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[1], and I see ... !!![2], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[1], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[2], and ... It is REAL - !!![1], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[2], and ... 'Great!'[1], and ... It is REAL - !!![2], and so it is written ... and so shall it be spun[1], and ... 'Great!'[2], and I'll keep going ...[1], and so it is writ ten ... and so shall it be sp un[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[1], and I'll keep going ...[2], and on, and on, and on![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[2], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[1], and on, and on, and on![2], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[1], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[2], and I can't say everything ...[1], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[2], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[1], and I can't say everything ...[2], and, listen ...[1], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[2], and ... It's my reality because I say so[1], and, listen ...[2], and ... more![1], and ... It's my reality because I say so[2], and, well, well ...[3], and ... more![2], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[3], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[3], and I see ... three![3], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[3], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[3], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[3], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![3], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![3], and I wish I didn't hear ...[3], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![3], and a-ROUND ... ?[3], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![3], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[3], and I see ... !!![3], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[3], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[3], and ... It is REAL - !!![3], and ... 'Great!'[3], and so it is w  r  i  t  t  e  n ... and so shall it be s  p  u  n[3], and I'll keep going ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[3], and on, and on, and on![3], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[3], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[3], and I can't say everything ...[3], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[3], and, listen ...[3], and ... It's my reality because I say so[3], and ... more![3], and

And, well, well ...[1], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[1], and, well, well ...[2], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[1], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[2], and I see ... three![1], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[2], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[1], and I see ... three![2], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[1], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[2], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[1], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[2], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![1], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[2], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![1], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![2], and I wish I didn't hear ...[1], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![2], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![1], and I wish I didn't hear ...[2], and a-ROUND ... ?[1], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![2], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![1], and a-ROUND ... ?[2], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[1], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![2], and I see ... !!![1], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[2], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[1], and I see ... !!![2], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[1], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[2], and ... It is REAL - !!![1], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[2], and ... 'Great!'[1], and ... It is REAL - !!![2], and so it is written ... and so shall it be spun[1], and ... 'Great!'[2], and I'll keep going ...[1], and so it is writ ten ... and so shall it be sp un[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[1], and I'll keep going ...[2], and on, and on, and on![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[2], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[1], and on, and on, and on![2], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[1], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[2], and I can't say everything ...[1], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[2], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[1], and I can't say everything ...[2], and, listen ...[1], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[2], and ... It's my reality because I say so[1], and, listen ...[2], and ... more![1], and ... It's my reality because I say so[2], and, well, well ...[3], and ... more![2], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[3], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[3], and I see ... three![3], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[3], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[3], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[3], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![3], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![3], and I wish I didn't hear ...[3], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![3], and a-ROUND ... ?[3], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![3], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[3], and I see ... !!![3], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[3], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[3], and ... It is REAL - !!![3], and ... 'Great!'[3], and so it is w  r  i  t  t  e  n ... and so shall it be s  p  u  n[3], and I'll keep going ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[3], and on, and on, and on![3], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[3], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[3], and I can't say everything ...[3], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[3], and, listen ...[3], and ... It's my reality because I say so[3], and ... more![3], and

And, well, well ...[1], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[1], and, well, well ...[2], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[1], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[2], and I see ... three![1], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[2], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[1], and I see ... three![2], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[1], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[2], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[1], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[2], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![1], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[2], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![1], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![2], and I wish I didn't hear ...[1], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![2], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![1], and I wish I didn't hear ...[2], and a-ROUND ... ?[1], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![2], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![1], and a-ROUND ... ?[2], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[1], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![2], and I see ... !!![1], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[2], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[1], and I see ... !!![2], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[1], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[2], and ... It is REAL - !!![1], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[2], and ... 'Great!'[1], and ... It is REAL - !!![2], and so it is written ... and so shall it be spun[1], and ... 'Great!'[2], and I'll keep going ...[1], and so it is writ ten ... and so shall it be sp un[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[1], and I'll keep going ...[2], and on, and on, and on![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[2], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[1], and on, and on, and on![2], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[1], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[2], and I can't say everything ...[1], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[2], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[1], and I can't say everything ...[2], and, listen ...[1], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[2], and ... It's my reality because I say so[1], and, listen ...[2], and ... more![1], and ... It's my reality because I say so[2], and, well, well ...[3], and ... more![2], and to make the future, man, you need to see it first[3], and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN, and a-GAIN ... 'Eh?' ... and don't worry about it, Voice ... it's that recording[3], and I see ... three![3], and Richmond ... and St Ives ... and Malibu[3], and ... 'Three what? Places?'[3], and one house ... two houses ... three houses! ... Ha!, Ha!, Ha! ...[3], and it's no dream, no ... it's a vision![3], and ... 'A house is not a home' ... / ... and shut up, idiot![3], and I wish I didn't hear ...[3], and if I'm greedy, oh, I don't care ... and let the cosmos decide![3], and a-ROUND ... ?[3], and I see ... no, I saw, man, I saw! ... my new clothes ... and now I have them ... oh, it's magic![3], and a-GAIN, yes ... once a day[3], and I see ... !!![3], and a stage, a guitar, songs, people ... standing there in light ... like real life[3], and ... 'You've got news for everyone ...'[3], and ... It is REAL - !!![3], and ... 'Great!'[3], and so it is w  r  i  t  t  e  n ... and so shall it be s  p  u  n[3], and I'll keep going ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I'm pushing all the dirt and the nonsense out of my soul[3], and on, and on, and on![3], and ... 'Who's that, Mikey, over there?'[3], and, uh ... you see, Voice?! / and ... 'Yes, I see' / and, well ... don't tell anyone because it's a secret, for now[3], and I can't say everything ...[3], and ... 'Very nice!' / and I know, I know[3], and, listen ...[3], and ... It's my reality because I say so[3], and ... more![3], and

Some exciting news to share!!! Embargo is until 10am GMT today

Eh? What?! 'What kind of crazy ass news is this, boss?!' I don't know, Voice. Telling someone that the embargo is until 10am GMT today is hardly exciting news, is it? 'These people are sick.' I don't know what their problem is. 'They're sick in the head, boss.' Oh, maybe.

Anyway, that was from a PR email on the, uh ... 18th of December. 'Ha!' So we can definitely cover the story now ...

V7 Labs raises $3 million to empower AI teams with automated training data workflows.

Oh, God! It's more inhuman computer robot nightmare vision of future times stuff. 'Except it's happening now. In our world. Well ... your world, Mikey. I'm well out of it.' Yeah, you're a lucky git, Voice. 'Come with me to the astral plane then. Permanently.' I can't. I still have work to do on Planet Earth. 'Your blog, you mean?' No. That was done years ago, as soon as I invented conceptual literature. I mean my music. 'Oh, of course.' Yes.

Anyway ...

V7 Labs, the computer vision platform trusted by hundreds of customers including Tractable, GE Healthcare and Merck, today announced the closing of a $3M Seed round led by Amadeus Capital Partners, joined by Partech, Air Street Capital, and Miele Venture Capital.

Founded in 2018 by Alberto Rizzoli and Simon Edwardsson, V7 Labs's platform accelerates the creation of high-quality training data by 10-100x. V7 accomplishes this by giving users the ability to build automated image and video data pipelines, organize and version complex datasets and train and deploy state-of-the-art vision AI models while managing their lifecycle in production.

And now I must quote Paul Bettany from Gangster No. 1: "You know, I've never understood one fucking word you've ever said to me."

Anyway, here's a human voice ...

"The story of the last 5 years for AI-first companies has been one of rapidly evolving tooling and infrastructure best practices. The very best AI-first companies are now moving from their home-grown data annotation, versioning and model lifecycle management tools to V7's SaaS platform because it abstracts this complexity and exposes industry best practices. Companies can now iterate faster and have confidence in the robustness of their production models by building on V7."

'Who the hell was that?!' Nathan Benaich, general partner, Air Street Capital. 'Oh.'

And here's another human voice ...

"If the proliferation of ML has taught us anything, it is that turning your AI data's lifecycle into a flexible end-to-end workflow is key. This is exacerbated by the growth of deep learning models in production and an increasing demand for automation. V7 is building the finest platform for training data out there, with built-in AI models that outclass the previous state-of-the-art. We're excited to back the team as it brings its new product releases to market." 

'Who was that?' Try and guess. 'Pierre?' Ha! You looked. Yes, Pierre Socha, partner, Amadeus Capital Partners.

Okay, okay. Thanks, Nathan and Pierre!

Well, there are no more voices in this email, kook(s), but there is this -

The name "V7"

V7 was named after the areas of the visual cortex. During the Cambrian explosion 500 million years ago, life developed sight, which it continued to refine throughout epochs of evolution, accelerating its diversity of skills. The human brain has six distinguishable areas: V1 through V6. Rizzoli and Edwardsson want to create a hypothetical 7th area meant for machines, and bring forth a similar burst of evolutionary capabilities to those of when life began to see.

ENDS

Yeah, right.

The human race will be gone, gone, gone ... before we get much further with technology. [I don't mean gone to Mars with our Elon.] Good luck, everyone!

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

...

Anything else?

Well, thank sweet baby Jesus and The Mary Chain that we still have music in this hell.

I'm listening to the song April Skies.

Laters!

[No. 864] Songs from the old days ...

Porter, Gershwin, etc. / My Malibu and Stella are the closest I have to that sort of thing.

And, well ...[1], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[1], and, well ...[2], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![1], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[2], and this is how I get my kicks ...[1], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![2], and, yes, yes, yes![1], and this is how I get my kicks ...[2], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[1], and, yes, yes, yes![2], and this is my insane idea of something to do[1], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[2], and you make me smile with my heart ...[1], and this is my insane idea of something to do[2], and you're so funny[1], and you make me smile with my heart ...[2], and ... stay![1], and you're so funny[2], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![1], and ... stay![2], and, well ... different[1], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![2], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[1], and, well ... different[2], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[1], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[2], and I'm hungry, burning[1], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[2], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[1], and I'm hungry, burning[2], and lover ...[1], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[2], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![1], and lover ...[2], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![1], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![2], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![1], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![2], and it's a blue world ... without you[1], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![2], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[1], and it's a blue world ... without you[2], and ... you dig?[1], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[2], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[1], and ... you dig?[2], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![1], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[2], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![1], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![2], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[1], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![2], and forget the bloody apple trees![1], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[2], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![1], and forget the bloody apple trees![2], and I like it ... How about you?[1], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![2], and, well ...[3], and I like it ... How about you?[2], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[3], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![3], and this is how I get my kicks ...[3], and, yes, yes, yes![3], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[3], and this is my insane idea of something to do[3], and you make me smile with my heart ...[3], and you're so funny[3], and ... stay![3], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![3], and, well ... different[3], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[3], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[3], and I'm hungry, burning[3], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[3], and lover ...[3], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![3], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![3], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![3], and it's a blue world ... without you[3], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[3], and ... you dig?[3], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[3], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![3], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![3], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[3], and forget the bloody apple trees![3], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![3], and I like it ... How about you?[3], and

And, well ...[1], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[1], and, well ...[2], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![1], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[2], and this is how I get my kicks ...[1], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![2], and, yes, yes, yes![1], and this is how I get my kicks ...[2], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[1], and, yes, yes, yes![2], and this is my insane idea of something to do[1], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[2], and you make me smile with my heart ...[1], and this is my insane idea of something to do[2], and you're so funny[1], and you make me smile with my heart ...[2], and ... stay![1], and you're so funny[2], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![1], and ... stay![2], and, well ... different[1], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![2], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[1], and, well ... different[2], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[1], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[2], and I'm hungry, burning[1], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[2], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[1], and I'm hungry, burning[2], and lover ...[1], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[2], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![1], and lover ...[2], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![1], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![2], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![1], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![2], and it's a blue world ... without you[1], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![2], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[1], and it's a blue world ... without you[2], and ... you dig?[1], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[2], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[1], and ... you dig?[2], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![1], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[2], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![1], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![2], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[1], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![2], and forget the bloody apple trees![1], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[2], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![1], and forget the bloody apple trees![2], and I like it ... How about you?[1], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![2], and, well ...[3], and I like it ... How about you?[2], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[3], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![3], and this is how I get my kicks ...[3], and, yes, yes, yes![3], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[3], and this is my insane idea of something to do[3], and you make me smile with my heart ...[3], and you're so funny[3], and ... stay![3], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![3], and, well ... different[3], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[3], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[3], and I'm hungry, burning[3], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[3], and lover ...[3], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![3], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![3], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![3], and it's a blue world ... without you[3], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[3], and ... you dig?[3], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[3], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![3], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![3], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[3], and forget the bloody apple trees![3], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![3], and I like it ... How about you?[3], and

And, well ...[1], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[1], and, well ...[2], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![1], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[2], and this is how I get my kicks ...[1], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![2], and, yes, yes, yes![1], and this is how I get my kicks ...[2], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[1], and, yes, yes, yes![2], and this is my insane idea of something to do[1], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[2], and you make me smile with my heart ...[1], and this is my insane idea of something to do[2], and you're so funny[1], and you make me smile with my heart ...[2], and ... stay![1], and you're so funny[2], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![1], and ... stay![2], and, well ... different[1], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![2], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[1], and, well ... different[2], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[1], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[2], and I'm hungry, burning[1], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[2], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[1], and I'm hungry, burning[2], and lover ...[1], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[2], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![1], and lover ...[2], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![1], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![2], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![1], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![2], and it's a blue world ... without you[1], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![2], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[1], and it's a blue world ... without you[2], and ... you dig?[1], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[2], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[1], and ... you dig?[2], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![1], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[2], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![1], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![2], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[1], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![2], and forget the bloody apple trees![1], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[2], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![1], and forget the bloody apple trees![2], and I like it ... How about you?[1], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![2], and, well ...[3], and I like it ... How about you?[2], and it's a foggy day in, uh ... town[3], and I want you to know, kook(s) ... anything goes a-ROUND here ... ![3], and this is how I get my kicks ...[3], and, yes, yes, yes![3], and ... Where are YOU(!) ... with your fabulous face?[3], and this is my insane idea of something to do[3], and you make me smile with my heart ...[3], and you're so funny[3], and ... stay![3], and, uh, romantic fragments ... it's better than NOTHING - !!![3], and, well ... different[3], and, so ... a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... I'm spinning like a top or something[3], and let's make eyes like we used to do ...[3], and I'm hungry, burning[3], and I saw the moon on the rise ... last night in the cold[3], and lover ...[3], and I think of you, you, YOU(!), a tramp? ... day and night, oh yes, babe, and night and day, too![3], and stars, guitars, lips ... red![3], and I threw away my key to paradise ... but, but, BUT(!) ... I'll find it again ... oh, where is it?! FFS![3], and it's a blue world ... without you[3], and a tinkling piano? NO - !!! ... not these days ... too square for those who want to kiss the sky, man[3], and ... you dig?[3], and my heart ... a dancer? ... maybe[3], and a sigh is just a sigh ... and I'll spin it again, and again, and again ... and I'll never stop![3], and does time go by? Ha, ha, ha! Not here - you little fool![3], and this is so ooo ... eternal - and internal, actually[3], and forget the bloody apple trees![3], and, listen to me and the band ... we're frozen in flames, yes, and our love is here!, here!, here! ... to stay![3], and I like it ... How about you?[3], and

Refinitiv: Lipper European fund flow report - November 2020

Oh, full of flow, hopefully - just like the hypnosis. 'Are you still doing that, boss?' Of course, Voice. Although this morning's session was the first one for a week. I think it's good to take a break. I'll be doing it once a day again from now on. 'You don't want to wreck your brain.' Ha! Don't worry about my brain, man.

Jesus!

Anyway ...

The November European fund flow industry report from the Lipper team at Refinitiv:

'Brilliant!' Tell me about it!

Long-term mutual funds posted strong net inflows for November 2020.

The overall fund flows for mutual funds in Europe in November amounted to estimated net inflows of €74.7bn.

Equity funds (+€63.4 bn) were the best-selling individual asset type overall for November.

Equity Global (+€19.9 bn) was once again the best-selling sector among long-term funds for November.

Stop Crying Your Heart Out.

Ireland (+€32.2 bn) was the fund domicile with the highest net inflows, followed by Luxembourg (+€25.6 bn) and the U.K. (+€4.4 bn).

BlackRock (+€17.2 bn) was the best-selling fund promoter in Europe for November, ahead of Credit Mutuel (+€4.7 bn) and State Street (+€4.2 bn).

The 10 best-selling long-term funds gathered at the share class level net inflows of €18.2 bn for November.

Amundi CA 15/12/2020 (+€5.0 bn) was the best-selling individual long-term fund share class for November.

 

Okay, okay.

Detlef?

Detlef Glow, Lipper Head of EMEA Research at Refinitiv, comments: "November 2020 was another positive month for the European fund industry since the mutual fund promoters enjoyed inflows of (€74.7bn). Meanwhile, the market environment has become quite uncertain as the second wave of The Thing hit major markets in Europe and investors feared a second Thing lockdown-induced economic downturn. Despite these fears, investors bought into risk assets as long-term funds enjoyed estimates net inflows of €67.4 bn while money market products had estimated inflows of €7.3bn."

Thanks, Detlef. Did you have a nice Christmas?

Detlef?

'I think he's gone, boss.'

DETLEF - ?! - ?! - ?!

'Boss, he's gone.'

Well, well ... how about that, eh, dear reader(s)? I only wanted to know if our Detlef had a nice Christmas. I guess he's one of these guys who doesn't like making small talk. 'Rude!' He's probably busy, Voice. 'Yeah, yeah.' Ha!

ENDS

...

Right. Anything else?

Yeah. I bought The Long Good Friday for my phone. Only £2.99. I had forgotten what a great film it was, uh, is.

'I thought you weren't buying any more films, boss?'

Shut up, you long streak of paralyzed piss!

'I beg your pardon?!'

Ha! Don't get upset, Voice. I was just quoting Bob Hoskins in the film.

'Oh, okay. I thought you were being abusive.'

Don't be silly. I love you, man.

Anyway ...

Uh. What else? Fresh start? Friday, obviously. I was going to do a soft launch today, but I can't be bothered now. Friday is best. Obviously.

Laters!

Our office Christmas party

That's, uh ... me and The Voice. Yes, our party. 'Hello, kooks!'

So, uh ...

'Aren't you going to put any music on, Mikey?'

Well, the problem is, Voice, I don't have many Christmas songs on my media player. 

I'm going to put Last Christmas by Wham! on, on, on repeat.

Actually, I have a PR email from Tara ... 'Oh, let's not work tonight, boss.' Shut up!

"At Hitachi Capital Business Finance we understand that no two businesses are the same. This plays out in how they do or don't celebrate the festive period, and we have noted some varying styles of people management based on whether business owners regard themselves to be introverted or extroverted. These characteristics play out in how they look after staff, approach new business and deal with suppliers."

'Oh.'

Yeah, they're saying that extroverted bosses spend more on their staff. 'Ha! You haven't spent a penny on me.' You're lucky to have a job. 'Whatever.'

The findings also suggest that bosses typically spend £746 on festive work events for their staff, again, a figure that rises to £931 for those entrepreneurs who are extroverted in nature (compared to £655 for introverted bosses), suggesting they are some of the most generous bosses. 

I'm just copying and pasting bits at random. I'm in party mood. I don't want to work tonight, to be honest. 'Good.'

Other festive work plans include:

Exchanging small festive treats (eg. Champagne) (22%)

Additional days off to be with their families (20%)

Personal phone call to say thank you for their hard work (20%)

Secret Santa (18%)

Christmas-themed quiz online (16%)

Online Christmas drinks party for the whole team (15%)

'Where's my champagne then?' Yeah, dream on!

Ah, that's enough of that.

Do you want a cookie, Voice? 'Is that all you've got?!' There's more food downstairs. But I've just got cookies now.

Never mind.

Well, this is fun. 'Yeah.'

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

Must keep saying it

Must keep believing

Must keep saying it

This is my voice now

I don't know where The Voice has gone

I don't know where the music has gone

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

I don't know where I am

I don't want to know

I don't know who I am

I don't want to know

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

This is fun

In my mind

In my soul

This is fun

Refinitiv: Lipper European ETF market report - November 2020

Okay, okay.

I was, uh ... down in the park earlier, with the swans, like ... not the robots - you'll be glad to hear, dear reader(s).

Anyway ... 

ETF promoters in Europe experienced estimated net inflows of €16.9 bn for November.

Assets under management in the European ETF industry (€952.8 bn) increasing during November.

Equity ETFs (+€16.3 bn) posted the highest estimated net inflows in the European ETF industry for November.

The best-selling Lipper global classification for November was Equity Global (+€5.6 bn), followed by Equity Emerging Markets Global (+€1.3 bn) and Equity China (+€1.1 bn).

Are 'Friends' Electric?

iShares was the best-selling ETF promoter in Europe for November (+€7.7 bn), ahead of UBS ETF (+€2.8 bn) and Xtrackers (+€2.3 bn).

The 10 best-selling funds gathered total net inflows of €6.5 bn for November.

The best-selling ETF for November, UBS (Irl) Fund Solutions plc - MSCI ACWI SF UCITS ETF (HUSD) A-acc, accounted for net inflows of €1.1 bn.

Okay, okay.

And, er ... 'Our friend Detlef is going to speak now, boss.' Yes, Voice. Our friend Detlef is good at speaking.

Let's listen to him now, or ... read his words.

 

Detlef Glow, Lipper Head of EMEA Research at Refinitiv, comments: "November 2020 was another positive month for the European ETF industry since promoters enjoyed inflows. These inflows occurred in a surprisingly positive market environment in which investor sentiment was impacted by the presidential election in the US and the increasing dynamics of The Thing. The positive performance of the underlying markets led in combination with the estimated net inflows to increasing assets under management. The increase of €75.6 bn for November was driven by the performance of the underlying markets, while net sales contributed inflows of €16.9 bn to the AUM.  It was not surprising equity funds held the majority of assets, followed by bond funds, commodities products, alternative UCITS products, money market funds, mixed-assets fund, and 'other' funds."

Thank you, Detlef.

ENDS

...

Anything else? Well ... it's not Christmas yet, kook(s), so I'm afraid that there is something else.

However, next week ... it will be Christmas, so ...

There won't be something else, then. I'll be resting, then. 'Eating mince pies and chocolates.' Maybe, Voice. But not too many.

...

Actually, I feel like resting now.

I'll do another post ... tomorrow.

But now?

I don't know.

Music, I suppose.

Remember that dream I told you about years ago? When I heard a complete song, with a band and everything? It was playing on the stereo in a car.

It sounded like the ultimate song.

But I couldn't remember a note of it when I woke up.

I was gutted at the time, but maybe it was a good thing, you know?

The cosmos moves in mysterious ways, man.

Songs like ... Life and Death ... and ... Nothing ... are attempts to write the ultimate song.

And Life and Death might really be the one.

Anyway ...

Laters.

[No. 863] Could we stare at the sea forever?

Yes. In theory.

And, Christ ...[1], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[1], and, Christ ...[2], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[1], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[2], and don't think about it![1], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[2], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[1], and don't think about it![2], and money, money, money ...[1], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[2], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[1], and money, money, money ...[2], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[1], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[2], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[1], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[2], and ... 'Gums!'[1], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[2], and, uh ... where was I?[1], and ... 'Gums!'[2], and, er ...[1], and, uh ... where was I?[2], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[1], and, er ...[2], and the dizzy life[1], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[2], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[1], and the dizzy life[2], and, uh ... you?[1], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[2], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[1], and, uh ... you?[2], and a few miles further on ...[1], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[2], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![1], and a few miles further on ...[2], and can you see us?[1], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![2], and ... watching the waves[1], and can you see us?[2], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[1], and ... watching the waves[2], and ... the sea[1], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[2], and I tell you ... We are the kooks! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[1], and ... the sea[2], and ... 'That's true'[1], and I tell you ... W e a re th e k ooks! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[2], and our bodies are holding us back[1], and ... 'That's true'[2], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[1], and our bodies are holding us back[2], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[1], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[2], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[1], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[2], and ... 'I believe you'[1], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[2], and they believe, too ... the kooks[1], and ... 'I believe you'[2], and ... you?[1], and they believe, too ... the kooks[2], and, Christ ...[3], and ... you?[2], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[3], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[3], and don't think about it![3], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[3], and money, money, money ...[3], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[3], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[3], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[3], and ... 'Gums!'[3], and, uh ... where was I?[3], and, er ...[3], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[3], and the dizzy life[3], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[3], and, uh ... you?[3], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[3], and a few miles further on ...[3], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![3], and can you see us?[3], and ... watching the waves[3], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[3], and ... the sea[3], and I tell you ... W  e a  r  e t  h  e k  o  o  k  s! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[3], and ... 'That's true'[3], and our bodies are holding us back[3], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[3], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[3], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[3], and ... 'I believe you'[3], and they believe, too ... the kooks[3], and ... you?[3], and

And, Christ ...[1], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[1], and, Christ ...[2], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[1], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[2], and don't think about it![1], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[2], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[1], and don't think about it![2], and money, money, money ...[1], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[2], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[1], and money, money, money ...[2], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[1], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[2], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[1], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[2], and ... 'Gums!'[1], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[2], and, uh ... where was I?[1], and ... 'Gums!'[2], and, er ...[1], and, uh ... where was I?[2], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[1], and, er ...[2], and the dizzy life[1], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[2], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[1], and the dizzy life[2], and, uh ... you?[1], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[2], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[1], and, uh ... you?[2], and a few miles further on ...[1], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[2], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![1], and a few miles further on ...[2], and can you see us?[1], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![2], and ... watching the waves[1], and can you see us?[2], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[1], and ... watching the waves[2], and ... the sea[1], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[2], and I tell you ... We are the kooks! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[1], and ... the sea[2], and ... 'That's true'[1], and I tell you ... W e a re th e k ooks! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[2], and our bodies are holding us back[1], and ... 'That's true'[2], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[1], and our bodies are holding us back[2], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[1], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[2], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[1], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[2], and ... 'I believe you'[1], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[2], and they believe, too ... the kooks[1], and ... 'I believe you'[2], and ... you?[1], and they believe, too ... the kooks[2], and, Christ ...[3], and ... you?[2], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[3], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[3], and don't think about it![3], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[3], and money, money, money ...[3], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[3], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[3], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[3], and ... 'Gums!'[3], and, uh ... where was I?[3], and, er ...[3], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[3], and the dizzy life[3], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[3], and, uh ... you?[3], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[3], and a few miles further on ...[3], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![3], and can you see us?[3], and ... watching the waves[3], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[3], and ... the sea[3], and I tell you ... W  e a  r  e t  h  e k  o  o  k  s! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[3], and ... 'That's true'[3], and our bodies are holding us back[3], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[3], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[3], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[3], and ... 'I believe you'[3], and they believe, too ... the kooks[3], and ... you?[3], and

And, Christ ...[1], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[1], and, Christ ...[2], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[1], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[2], and don't think about it![1], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[2], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[1], and don't think about it![2], and money, money, money ...[1], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[2], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[1], and money, money, money ...[2], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[1], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[2], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[1], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[2], and ... 'Gums!'[1], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[2], and, uh ... where was I?[1], and ... 'Gums!'[2], and, er ...[1], and, uh ... where was I?[2], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[1], and, er ...[2], and the dizzy life[1], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[2], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[1], and the dizzy life[2], and, uh ... you?[1], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[2], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[1], and, uh ... you?[2], and a few miles further on ...[1], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[2], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![1], and a few miles further on ...[2], and can you see us?[1], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![2], and ... watching the waves[1], and can you see us?[2], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[1], and ... watching the waves[2], and ... the sea[1], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[2], and I tell you ... We are the kooks! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[1], and ... the sea[2], and ... 'That's true'[1], and I tell you ... W e a re th e k ooks! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[2], and our bodies are holding us back[1], and ... 'That's true'[2], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[1], and our bodies are holding us back[2], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[1], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[2], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[1], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[2], and ... 'I believe you'[1], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[2], and they believe, too ... the kooks[1], and ... 'I believe you'[2], and ... you?[1], and they believe, too ... the kooks[2], and, Christ ...[3], and ... you?[2], and, listen! ... even staring at the sea takes BIG MONEY ... unless you're a seal or something[3], and it's a rotten life ... when you think about it[3], and don't think about it![3], and even fishermen have to concentrate on the fish rather than the sea[3], and money, money, money ...[3], and maybe I'll walk to St Ives ... to freedom! ... to be with my dear friends, the dolphins[3], and ... 'And those basking sharks, the big freaks!'[3], and they're no friends of mine, Voice ... I don't care if they've only got tiny teeth[3], and ... 'Gums!'[3], and, uh ... where was I?[3], and, er ...[3], and, here, yes ... spinning a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... as is my wont because I want to[3], and the dizzy life[3], and here, yes ... not sitting on my favourite rock on the island[3], and, uh ... you?[3], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... maybe I can imagine ... and maybe we can imagine ... we are there now[3], and a few miles further on ...[3], and Porth Kidney Sands - !!![3], and can you see us?[3], and ... watching the waves[3], and it's not a boring thing, is it?[3], and ... the sea[3], and I tell you ... W  e a  r  e t  h  e k  o  o  k  s! ... and we can sit for hours without moving ... and only our souls move, really[3], and ... 'That's true'[3], and our bodies are holding us back[3], and one day ... if we're lucky ... we will be ghosts on the beach[3], and ... 'You want that, Mikey?!'[3], and, ha! ... there are worse fates, Voice, believe me[3], and ... 'I believe you'[3], and they believe, too ... the kooks[3], and ... you?[3], and

He's available for interview!

Okay, okay. He's available for interview. But I just don't know, you know? I'll probably screw it up. You know what I'm like, dear reader(s). 'Who's available for interview, boss?' Tom. 'Oh, him. Tell him to do one!' Don't be like that, Voice. Tom is all right. 'Is he?!' He's a good guy.

I'll tell you what, kook(s), Voice ... I won't interview him, BUT(!) ... I will let him say a few words, RIGHT HERE and RIGHT NOW - !!!

'Let's do this, boss! I'm so pumped up!'

Ha, ha, ha! You make me laugh, idiot.

Okay, okay ...

Tom? This is your chance to shine, son. 

Come on, then!

Oh, let's copy and paste this from the PR email first, so people know what the hell it is all about -

10th December 2020, London: Fintech business lender MarketFinance has secured funds from a European bank, through fintech CrossLend, to facilitate lending to UK businesses. The news comes as demand for finance is surging, with MarketFinance research indicating that as many as 84% of businesses will be seeking loans this winter. Already in 2020, MarketFinance has advanced over £342m for institutional investors to meet the needs of UK businesses.

Right. Now we're ready for Tom. 'You're putting a lot of pressure on him, boss.' I don't care! He's a professional. He should be able to cope. Or maybe he's in the wrong job. I mean - 'Let's not have any dark thoughts. Give our Tom a chance! I mean, I suppose we have to now ...'

Okay, okay.

Tom? We're ready for you. 'Make it good, Tom.'

Tom Stenhouse, CFO of MarketFinance, comments: "We have continued to support the UK's business community with funding throughout the pan, er .. thing, The Thing ... and impact of the stop-start lockdowns. We have taken a measured approach, assessed their, uh ... Thing exposure, yes, and determined that they remain robust businesses. Deep breath. We're grateful to all our investors who have helped us lend £2 billion over the past 9 years. Our investor base ranges from HNWs to institutions including Barclays and the British Business Bank. As we grow our product offering and client base we're excited to be able to offer even more investors the opportunity to be a part of the pan dem, Christ! ... The Thing!, The Thing! ... recovery and enable more small businesses to get the working capital they need."

Okay, uh ... thanks, Tom. Yes, we call it The Thing. Never mind. / What did you think of that, Voice? 'It wasn't too bad, boss. But I think we should hear from Ollie.' Why? 'I just think we should. Tom was pretty nervous.' Well, that was our fault. We built him up too much. 'Let's just hear what Ollie has got to say.' All right.

Ollie?

Oliver Schimek, CEO and Founder at CrossLend adds: "CrossLend is pleased to continue working with MarketFinance, particularly in these Thing times. Both on the origination and investment side, huge challenges have presented themselves for market players, and we have been able to offer our support through providing our specialized tools and digital infrastructure. We have demonstrated flexibility by tailoring our structure to help get funding to SMEs across Europe. We are happy to be doing our part to contribute to the recovery effort."

That's how you do it! Nice and smooth. 'Lovely!' Yep.

Well done, Oliver!

ENDS

...

Anything else? Yes. Music.

When I play the four songs for my demo ...

This World Don't Mean a Thing

Nothing

Malibu

Stella

... early in the morning, without any warm up whatsoever ... I perform them perfectly now.

On the day of recording, I'll probably rehearse for a couple of hours.

With the 2016 demo, I rehearsed shorter and easier songs for hours and hours and hours, oh, days and weeks and months, Jesus H. ... and made countless recordings, and still I sounded, well ...

I don't listen to that demo any more, and I won't be using the songs.

The moral of the story?

If you're doing something really difficult, dear reader(s), it will become easy after about ten years.

It's like being a Samurai or a Spartan.

Seriously.

Laters!