Well, that's a relief!
'What's this, boss?' What do you think, Voice? 'Er ... PR email?' Congratulations! 'Do I win a Jammie Dodger?' Yes. 'Really?!' No. 'Oh.' Ha!
I'm not made of Jammie Dodgers. Besides, I don't eat biscuits any more. And I don't want my staff filling themselves full of junk. Let's get healthy! 'Can I use your dumbbells, boss?' Ha! I'd like to see that. You're just a voice, Voice. 'Yeah. Never mind.'
Christ.
Anyway ...
Eusipa press release: Volume largely stable on Europe's structured products markets.
Fair enough.
Turnover in investment and leverage products on reporting European financial markets totalled EUR 35 billion in the fourth quarter of 2020. Turnover increased 5 percent quarter on quarter and 27 percent year on year. These and other market data were sourced by the European Structured Investment Products Association (EUSIPA) from its members and analysed by Derivative Partners AG.
Yeah, okay.
Fourth-quarter turnover in investment products on European trading venues amounted to EUR 13 billion, 37 percent of the total. Investment product turnover increased 40 percent over the quarter, but remained largely stable compared with the last quarter of 2019. Turnover in leverage products (Warrants, Knock-Out Warrants, and Constant Leverage Certificates) reached EUR 22 billion in the period from October to December, representing 63 percent of the total. Turnover in leverage products increased 47 percent year on year, but fell 8 percent from the previous quarter.
Yeah, okay.
At the end of December, trading venues located in reporting EUSIPA markets were offering 448,035 investment products and 1,237,343 leverage products. As such, the number of listed products was stable on a quarterly basis, though contracted 7 percent from the previous year.
Yeah, okay.
Banks issued 1,332,686 new investment and leverage products in the fourth quarter of 2020, an increase of 2 percent on the previous quarter and 19 percent year on year. In total, 147,704 new investment products were launched, accounting for 11 percent of new issues; the 1,184,982 new leverage products represent 89 percent of the total. Investment product issuance was up 16 per cent on the previous quarter; leverage product issuance was unchanged from Q3 2020, though up 22% year on year.
Yeah, okay.
'Is there much more of this?' A bit.
For Austria, Belgium, Germany, and Switzerland, the market volume of investment and leverage products issued as securities stood at EUR 281 billion at the end of the fourth quarter, a 2 percent quarter-on-quarter increase.
Yeah, okay.
The market volume of investment products was a stable EUR 271 billion – up just 2 percent quarter on quarter and 2 percent year on year.
Yeah, okay.
The outstanding volume of leverage products totalled EUR 10 billion, a 30 percent year-on-year decrease that can be attributed largely to the Swiss market.
Yeah -
Oh, ENDS.
Nice one!
...
Anything else?
I probably won't listen to that new Elon audiobook. 'Why not?' It's all about rockets. There's not much personal stuff. 'Don't you like rockets, boss?' Rockets are all right, Voice. I prefer songs.
Anyway ...
How much is Bitcoin now? It's a shame I didn't buy any years ago. Never mind, eh?
I'm not depressed about it. My songs are like crypto to me. 'Explain!' I mean, if I can get the ten world-beaters I want ... it will be like buying thousands of Bitcoins for, uh ... ten pence each or something. Do you know what I mean? 'Yeah.' Magic, out of nowhere. Like all magic. That's what I'm talking about.
And I'm not stopping at the BIG TEN, man.
The BIG TEN is all about being "respectable". So I can look myself in the mirror without feeling ashamed ...
Does anyone understand what the fuck I'm talking about?!
'Ha, ha, ha! Not in this world, Mikey. You're on your own.'
Uh.
Never, never ... mind.
Laters.
