That is the question.
I think it can be done - even if you're a Regular Joe surrounded by chaos, and, uh ... "normality". You've got to make the decision.
Actually, I'm not sure it's a decision. It's something stronger than that. Something needs to break inside you. Something needs to die inside.
I keep thinking of that Krishna guy. You know, the founder? He lived a pretty normal life until the age of seventy, and then ... he just went batshit crazy, opening temples here, there, and everywhere, writing eighty books, and Krishna knows what else. Do you know what I mean?
I guess he couldn't stomach it any more. I mean, the reality of his first seventy years of life. The last twelve years of his life were SOMETHING ELSE.
And he didn't have any money when he started. I think he had a bag of potatoes or rice.
Amazing.
The guy was out there!!! GONE - !!!
Do you know what I mean?
So, it can be done.
...
Something's gonna break inside me. Something's gonna die. I can feel it. I can really feel it.
I went for a walk to Richmond yesterday. I sort of enjoyed it because it's nice to go for a walk, BUT(!) ... it sort of sickened me at the same time.
The only place where I can fully enjoy "normality" is in Cornwall. However, that's a super-normal reality because I have a mystical connection to the place. If I lived there, I would never get anything done with my music.
So, holidays only.
Something is gonna break, and when it does ... nothing else will matter. The TV, the noise in the street, YouTube videos, the news, even blogging. Nothing will get me down. Nothing will stop me.
It's not a decision I can make. Decisions are weak. Decisions are for losers.
I will just snap - soon.
Enjoy your weekend, kooks!
Bye.
