Thursday, 9 November 2017

Burger flipper starts work at Advent International!

Well, well ... this is an interesting story. Raul Alvarez was just flipping burgers at McDonald's! But somehow he's turned up at Advent International as a senior executive. 'Yeah. Unbelievable.' Here's a bit about the firm -

Founded in 1984, Advent International is one of the largest and most experienced global private equity firms. With offices on four continents, we have established a globally integrated team of over 190 investment professionals, focused on buyouts and growth equity investments in five core sectors. Since initiating our private equity strategy in 1989, we have invested $39 billion in over 330 private equity investments across 40 countries, and as of June 30, 2017, managed $43 billion in assets. Today, as we did more than 30 years ago, we seek to invest in well-positioned companies and partner with management teams to create value through sustained revenue and earnings growth.

Ha! And people say that working at McDonald's is a dead-end job. How silly do those people feel now? 'Boss.' What, Voice? 'You've got it all wrong.' No I haven't. 'Yes you have! Mr Alvarez was the chief operating officer at McDonald's.' Christ! Man, you don't want to take those job titles seriously, not at McDonald's. 'All right. Explain this -'

This person is connected to 62 board members in 6 different organizations across 9 different industries.

Oh. What's that? 'You know what it is. That's what Bloomberg says about our Raul. Bloomberg normally says shit like this -'

This person is connected to 0 board members in 0 different organizations across 0 different industries.

'And it says that sort of thing about big hedge fund guys.' So? 'So, Mr Alvarez ain't no burger flipper, boss. He was more or less running the joint, with the chief executive.' So, he was deputy manager at one of their branches. Big deal! 'FFS! Why do I waste my breath?' I don't know, Voice. Why do you? Just sod off!


Has he gone? / Dear reader(s), I actually think it's a good story, you know? It's just a shame Voice had to ruin it with a dose of reality, the idiot, but I can't get the staff.

Anyway, let's move on.


Right. Anything else? Not a lot, no. This is the last post of the week. Politics? Don't make me laugh. 'Music, Mikey?' Oh, you're still here. 'You'll never get rid of me. / What's this? What are you listening to?' Er, that Liam Gallagher album. Noel will release his new album soon. 'Okay.' Uh. But I can't get into Gallagher lyrics, to be honest with you, except the best or most entertaining ones, like Live Forever or Supersonic. Some people say lyrics aren't important. I have some sympathy with that, so now prefer The Beatles to Bob Dylan. 'Nice one. Top tunes!' Yes. Having said that, man, a bad lyric is really noticeable in a song and often ruins the listening experience in my experience, you dig? 'Yeah.' Never mind. Live and let live, eh?

Well, have a nice weekend, reader(s)! Later(s), crocodile(s)!