What?! Who are these people?!
Ha, ha, ha! Let's find out! 'Yeah! Come on! Let's do it, boss - !!!' All right, Voice, calm down. It's only a PR email. Christ.
Brussels, 18 June 2020: Heike Arbter of Austrian RCB re-elected as EUSIPA chairwoman; Swiss Roger Studer re-elected vice-chairman.
Nice one! / More!
Together with its members, the European Structured Investment Products Association (EUSIPA) takes great pleasure in announcing that its General Assembly has re-elected Mrs. Heike Arbter as the association's chairwoman and Roger Studer as vice-chairman. Heike Arbter is a board member at Austrian Raiffeisen Centrobank and headed the RCB’s structured products business for many years. Roger Studer is member of the board of directors of Bank Vontobel Europe AG and a member of the advisory council of Deutsche Borse Commodities AG. He has been EUSIPA's vice president since 2009.
Okay, okay. This is the first time I've even heard of Eusipa. Or EUSIPA. 'You learn something new every day.' Of course I do. It's why I'm such a genius.
Never stop growing! Never stop learning!
Anyway ...
Arbter, who thanks her colleagues for re-electing her, says: "It is a great honour to see my colleagues across our European association landscape confirming their confidence in me. The EU financial services sector is facing manifold pressures. We will have to keep a steady focus on customer orientation while ensuring our business stays aligned to the principles of sustainable banking. The efforts undertaken by the structured products industry throughout the past years have, in that sense, been a solid contribution as they have greatly enhanced transparency and customer understanding of our asset class."
Yeah, yeah. On my blog, she says, but fair enough. 'These voices, eh?' Pardon? 'I said, these voices, boss, you know?' Ha! You can talk.
Anyway ...
Studer adds: "The banking landscape is undergoing a global transformation, which impacts all angles of asset management in terms of distribution infrastructure and investor access to our products. While the regulatory angle of our work remains important we have to ensure the sector provides products and services needed by our customers, professional and retail alike. We will thus work more resolutely than ever to calibrate our association towards the commercial challenges our members face."
Okay, okay. / And, uh ... well, that's it, actually. 'No ENDS?' I can add some. 'Go on then.' All right.
ENDS
...
Anything else? I don't know. There might be. 'Are you feeling positive, boss?' What? Oh, you mean that hypnosis thing. Yeah, man. You're supposed to do it twice a day. I did it four times yesterday. 'You might damage your brain.' Ha! I'm not bothered. 'Well, I suppose not. I mean ... the stuff you've put your brain through over the years.' Exactly! Hypnosis is easy compared to all that.
I'll tell you, kook(s): My brain is really clear these days. I'm focused on one goal, and the world has retreated or ... been pushed away. Yes, I've pushed it away.
I won't tolerate any nonsense, any distraction.
Listen! I'm serious now. Big star or The Dude. There is absolutely nothing in between those two states of being.
Sure, I've had fun, sucking around, bothering all the citizens with my jerk-off behaviour. Oh, almost a lifetime of it. 'Ha!' But it's time to say: "Goodbye, Dude! Thanks for leaving. I'm Michael Fowke."
Do you know what I mean?
Laters!
