'Where's the PR email, boss?!'
Be quiet. Please.
I'm not in the mood.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm not going to Cornwall yet, dear reader(s). I don't know when. Maybe April. I've got to control myself. My desires, you dig? Even though I can taste those pasties! Cheese and onion. And the mint ice creams. And I can actually see the seagulls in my mind, swooping down, down, down ... 'Where are the dolphins?' In the sea.
Where I should be ... ???
Listen! My main concern at the moment ... is getting another "super" big song. I got a nice tune in seconds the other day while strumming my guitar. A verse and pre-chorus. It's not a ballad though. I want a ballad, man. I might write this new song if I can get the rhythm right. It don't feel right. But ... don't worry about it.
It's not important.
'Watch out! Basking sharks!'
Don't make me laugh.
Listen to me, kooks. Are you listening? Even though I'm nearly fifty-three, I only look about forty - especially now that I've lost weight and put on muscle. I can still be a big star. It's my destiny. BUT(!) ... I need a third "super" song, to match Mighty Soul and Shady, Dodgy, Shifty. I need it! It's the last thing I think about when I go to sleep at night, and the first thing when I wake up in the morning. I -
'Oi!'
What? I'm talking!
'You were about forty when you started all this rock star caper, Mikey.'
Yeah, yeah. I've come a long way since then. A bloody £70 guitar from Argos, Voice. Come on! Are you kidding me?
And those early songs ...
Obviously, I had no idea it would take this long. Maybe I could have worked harder. However, I haven't always been this motivated. I mean, I remember how depressed I was in 2014 when I played my guitar for over twenty hours a week for four whole months and still sounded like shit at the end of it. Sure, I kept going. But it wasn't easy.
And I've said this before ... we all know people who give up on stuff after six months or a year of trying, but how many give up after five years? Because that's the killer time right there. Maybe five years ain't enough, man, but it feels like hell, and people don't realize that they've got to keep going ... NO MATTER WHAT!!!
I don't give a toss about your five years of commitment, loser! Do ten years!
Do you know what I mean?
And, yeah, yeah ... there's this guy on YouTube, a motivational guy, a great guy, sure, in his area of expertise ... who says if he decides to do something like, uh ... write and record a song ... he'll get it done in a day or two, and ... blah blah blah.
Very impressive.
But he ain't no one-man Beatles, man.
Does anyone understand what the fuck I'm talking about?!?!
Anyway ...
I've worn myself out now.
Say "bye", Voice. 'Eh?' Say "bye". Please. To the readers.
'Bye!'
