Your No. 1 relationship has got to be with the cosmos

Otherwise you're lost.

You don't worship the cosmos. That's for amateurs.

You don't read a book to find out more information about the cosmos. (If you've really got your shit together, you shouldn't need this post.)

You don't go into a certain building to be told about your relationship with the cosmos. That's for amateurs.

There is no human authority for you to consult with. The cosmos is the only authority.

Your ego? Obviously, hold on to your ego for dealing with this hellish world, but lose it occasionally to get the best connection with the cosmos. Dreams, blackouts, and visions are perfect for this.

Be confident that the cosmos isn't going anywhere. Everything else in your life is going somewhere. The cosmos isn't. We're talking billions and trillions of years before you were born, and billions and trillions after you die. And it's more than just the physical universe.

Get the picture?

Nice one, kooks!

Oh, I forgot. The cosmos expects you to have a "passion" of some kind. But isn't that a temporary thing? Yes, it is. However, if you become world-class at this "passion", the cosmos notices and gives you a promotion.

Is a promotion really necessary? Well, it all depends. Would you like to become a demigod, or a rat? Would you like to become a cosmic dolphin flying through space, or a pig on a farm somewhere? Or just another human?

These things are worth considering.

[No. 1,130]

And words words[1], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[1], and words words[2], and Im happy I dont want the stress[1], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[2], and sometimes I do of course[1], and Im happy I dont want the stress[2], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[1], and sometimes I do of course[2], and poetry is the big war obviously[1], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[2], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[1], and poetry is the big war obviously[2], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[1], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[2], and lets embrace it here[1], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[2], and or or or just ignore it[1], and lets embrace it here[2], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[1], and or or or just ignore it[2], and this is a holiday[1], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[2], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[1], and this is a holiday[2], and oh not a thing[1], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[2], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[1], and oh not a thing[2], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[1], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[2], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[1], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[2], and never ever mind with no brain is best[1], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[2], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[1], and never ever mind with no brain is best[2], and blood and guts it was brutal[1], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[2], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[1], and blood and guts it was brutal[2], and fight to live[1], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[2], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[1], and fight to live[2], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[1], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[2], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[1], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[2], and its tough but its just the way it is[1], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[2], and more come on[1], and its tough but its just the way it is[2], and words words[3], and more come on[2], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[3], and Im happy I dont want the stress[3], and sometimes I do of course[3], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[3], and poetry is the big war obviously[3], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[3], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[3], and lets embrace it here[3], and or or or just ignore it[3], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[3], and this is a holiday[3], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[3], and oh not a thing[3], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[3], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[3], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[3], and never ever mind with no brain is best[3], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[3], and blood and guts it was brutal[3], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[3], and fight to live[3], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[3], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[3], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[3], and its tough but its just the way it is[3], and more come on[3], and

And words words[1], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[1], and words words[2], and Im happy I dont want the stress[1], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[2], and sometimes I do of course[1], and Im happy I dont want the stress[2], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[1], and sometimes I do of course[2], and poetry is the big war obviously[1], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[2], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[1], and poetry is the big war obviously[2], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[1], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[2], and lets embrace it here[1], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[2], and or or or just ignore it[1], and lets embrace it here[2], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[1], and or or or just ignore it[2], and this is a holiday[1], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[2], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[1], and this is a holiday[2], and oh not a thing[1], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[2], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[1], and oh not a thing[2], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[1], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[2], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[1], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[2], and never ever mind with no brain is best[1], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[2], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[1], and never ever mind with no brain is best[2], and blood and guts it was brutal[1], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[2], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[1], and blood and guts it was brutal[2], and fight to live[1], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[2], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[1], and fight to live[2], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[1], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[2], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[1], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[2], and its tough but its just the way it is[1], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[2], and more come on[1], and its tough but its just the way it is[2], and words words[3], and more come on[2], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[3], and Im happy I dont want the stress[3], and sometimes I do of course[3], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[3], and poetry is the big war obviously[3], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[3], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[3], and lets embrace it here[3], and or or or just ignore it[3], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[3], and this is a holiday[3], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[3], and oh not a thing[3], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[3], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[3], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[3], and never ever mind with no brain is best[3], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[3], and blood and guts it was brutal[3], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[3], and fight to live[3], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[3], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[3], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[3], and its tough but its just the way it is[3], and more come on[3], and

And words words[1], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[1], and words words[2], and Im happy I dont want the stress[1], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[2], and sometimes I do of course[1], and Im happy I dont want the stress[2], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[1], and sometimes I do of course[2], and poetry is the big war obviously[1], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[2], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[1], and poetry is the big war obviously[2], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[1], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[2], and lets embrace it here[1], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[2], and or or or just ignore it[1], and lets embrace it here[2], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[1], and or or or just ignore it[2], and this is a holiday[1], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[2], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[1], and this is a holiday[2], and oh not a thing[1], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[2], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[1], and oh not a thing[2], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[1], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[2], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[1], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[2], and never ever mind with no brain is best[1], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[2], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[1], and never ever mind with no brain is best[2], and blood and guts it was brutal[1], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[2], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[1], and blood and guts it was brutal[2], and fight to live[1], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[2], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[1], and fight to live[2], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[1], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[2], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[1], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[2], and its tough but its just the way it is[1], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[2], and more come on[1], and its tough but its just the way it is[2], and words words[3], and more come on[2], and its nice and relaxed here with words that dont need to do nothing man[3], and Im happy I dont want the stress[3], and sometimes I do of course[3], and aRound and aRound and aRound and theres little war when youre dizzy[3], and poetry is the big war obviously[3], and fight fight fight or spin spin spin[3], and smoke and bullets or swords I dont know Im just fighting through the chaos[3], and lets embrace it here[3], and or or or just ignore it[3], and I can roll like a tearful mess on the floor and foam from my mouth or on the ceiling oh who cares[3], and this is a holiday[3], and the beautiful thing is the kooks you support me while the squares dont know a thing[3], and oh not a thing[3], and they know even less when I spin without a title and without punctuation ha ha ha[3], and maybe they think too much but we feel a lot dont we[3], and we feel too much maybe I dont know I just like it so what its not a crime is it[3], and never ever mind with no brain is best[3], and this is a great holiday from poetry and I had a real battle at the weekend man[3], and blood and guts it was brutal[3], and but Im still standing uh still spinning and I will live to fight another day[3], and fight to live[3], and aRound and aRound and aRound and we gotta keep going otherwise we will stop and thats not wise[3], and does that make sense not that I care ha ha ha[3], and there will always be words there will never be silence there will never be peace[3], and its tough but its just the way it is[3], and more come on[3], and

Intelligent fruit, but it's a bit artificial

'In the name of God, boss, what -'

In the name of Zeus, Voice!

'Sorry. In the name of Zeus, what on earth is this?!'

It's a PR email.

'What ... about fruit with brains, but it's not really real?'

Well ... let's find out ...

Morning Michael, and Voice,

Please find below a press release about groundbreaking new AI technology for soft fruit growers. The sector is currently under significant pressure from costs, labour and extremes in weather which is impacting profitability and viability.

'Oh, okay.' Ha!

FruitCast will help improve efficiency and profit margins by more precisely forecasting fruit growth and has been endorsed by major businesses in the sector for its practical approach.

If you are planning any pieces on AI making a difference in the agricultural sector or food production, or investment opportunities in this, and would like further insights or an interview, please don't hesitate to get in touch.

Sorry, Susannah, I don't give interviews.

'You're going to be a poet now.'

That's right, Voice. A mysterious poet, like Prince.

"I took another bubble bath with my pants on ..."

Anyway ...

Let's go straight to the voices ...

'Yippee!'

FruitCast CEO, Richard Williamson, formerly Managing Director of Dyson Farming and a consultant in bold strategic change, says: 

"Raising this capital is testament to the developer Raymond Martin and the team who have created a cutting-edge tool that is immensely valuable to growers. It could be a gamechanger for an industry plagued by challenges that are persistently squeezing margins.

"The AI capability is driven by one of the largest databases in the world, which gives it a firm foundation for accurate forecasting ahead of other competitors. This combined with the depth of understanding of practical agriculture and proven capability has made FruitCast attractive to agritech investors in what is a competitive and noisy marketplace." 

Noisy?! Christ! Just tell them to keep the noise down, man!

Anyway ...

Ray? Come on, son!

Chief Technical Officer, Dr Raymond Martin, developed FruitCast on the back of his PhD on optimising soft fruit processes, when growers asked him not to leave his research "on the shelf". He says yield forecasting is the holy grail for soft fruit growers:

Holy grail!

"It's a time sensitive crop, and too much fruit in any week means waste and loss, and too little, you lose business. We're delighted to have attracted the funding and industry support to bring FruitCast to launch. We want all growers to be able to precisely forecast their season to give them the leverage to take back the power in managing their costs and customer contracts." 

"Planning our labour needs and availability for our customers is wholly dependent on accurate estimation. There's a lot of -"

Okay, okay. / Actually -

"We are not looking to replace people. Automation goes hand-in-hand with the skills of workers on site and allows us to use our varied resources when and where they are most needed for greatest efficiency and our business' sustainability."

That remains to be seen. 

Right, Louise. You're up next. Make it good. No pressure, like.

Louise Sutherland from Ceres Agritech says: 

"FruitCast has huge potential to make transformational change in the industry. Predicting the timing and yield of strawberries is critical but extremely difficult to do accurately resulting in significant lost sales. Precise forecasting will help to increase growers' annual margins. We are delighted to see that a Ceres Agritech-backed technology is going to market." 

Strawberries, all right.

Thanks, guys.

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

...

Anything else, kooks?

I hope to write a poem in blank verse this week. I just fancy it, you know?

Laters.

[No. 1,129] 54

I wasn't told everything about 54. Possibly to protect me.

And ... 54[1], and I would like to see it go[1], and ... 54[2], and - Go![1], and I would like to see it go[2], and ... Could I spin it away???[1], and - Go![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![1], and ... Could I spin it away???[2], and, no, no, no[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![2], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[1], and, no, no, no[2], and ... 'No!'[1], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[2], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![1], and ... 'No!'[2], and ... Help![1], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![2], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![1], and ... Help![2], and you, you, you ...[1], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![2], and, ha, ha ...[1], and you, you, you ...[2], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[1], and, ha, ha ...[2], and I know I'll get there ... I will![1], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[2], and you can come, too[1], and I know I'll get there ... I will![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![1], and you can come, too[2], and ... Sod off - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![2], and my destiny ...[1], and ... Sod off - !!![2], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[1], and my destiny ...[2], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[1], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[2], and I mean -[1], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[2], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[1], and I mean -[2], and, uh ... never mind[1], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[2], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[1], and, uh ... never mind[2], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[1], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[2], and ... listen![1], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[2], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[1], and ... listen![2], and ... you know[1], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[2], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![1], and ... you know[2], and ... 'Yes!'[1], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![2], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![1], and ... 'Yes!'[2], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[1], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![2], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![1], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[2], and never never never - !!![1], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![2], and ... 54[3], and never never never - !!![2], and I would like to see it go[3], and - Go![3], and ... Could I spin it away???[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![3], and, no, no, no[3], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[3], and ... 'No!'[3], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![3], and ... Help![3], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![3], and you, you, you ...[3], and, ha, ha ...[3], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[3], and I know I'll get there ... I will![3], and you can come, too[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![3], and ... Sod off - !!![3], and my destiny ...[3], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[3], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[3], and I mean -[3], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[3], and, uh ... never mind[3], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[3], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[3], and ... listen![3], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[3], and ... you know[3], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![3], and ... 'Yes!'[3], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![3], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[3], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![3], and never never never - !!![3], and

And ... 54[1], and I would like to see it go[1], and ... 54[2], and - Go![1], and I would like to see it go[2], and ... Could I spin it away???[1], and - Go![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![1], and ... Could I spin it away???[2], and, no, no, no[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![2], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[1], and, no, no, no[2], and ... 'No!'[1], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[2], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![1], and ... 'No!'[2], and ... Help![1], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![2], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![1], and ... Help![2], and you, you, you ...[1], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![2], and, ha, ha ...[1], and you, you, you ...[2], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[1], and, ha, ha ...[2], and I know I'll get there ... I will![1], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[2], and you can come, too[1], and I know I'll get there ... I will![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![1], and you can come, too[2], and ... Sod off - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![2], and my destiny ...[1], and ... Sod off - !!![2], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[1], and my destiny ...[2], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[1], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[2], and I mean -[1], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[2], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[1], and I mean -[2], and, uh ... never mind[1], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[2], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[1], and, uh ... never mind[2], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[1], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[2], and ... listen![1], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[2], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[1], and ... listen![2], and ... you know[1], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[2], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![1], and ... you know[2], and ... 'Yes!'[1], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![2], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![1], and ... 'Yes!'[2], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[1], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![2], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![1], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[2], and never never never - !!![1], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![2], and ... 54[3], and never never never - !!![2], and I would like to see it go[3], and - Go![3], and ... Could I spin it away???[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![3], and, no, no, no[3], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[3], and ... 'No!'[3], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![3], and ... Help![3], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![3], and you, you, you ...[3], and, ha, ha ...[3], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[3], and I know I'll get there ... I will![3], and you can come, too[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![3], and ... Sod off - !!![3], and my destiny ...[3], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[3], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[3], and I mean -[3], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[3], and, uh ... never mind[3], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[3], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[3], and ... listen![3], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[3], and ... you know[3], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![3], and ... 'Yes!'[3], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![3], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[3], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![3], and never never never - !!![3], and

And ... 54[1], and I would like to see it go[1], and ... 54[2], and - Go![1], and I would like to see it go[2], and ... Could I spin it away???[1], and - Go![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![1], and ... Could I spin it away???[2], and, no, no, no[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![2], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[1], and, no, no, no[2], and ... 'No!'[1], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[2], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![1], and ... 'No!'[2], and ... Help![1], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![2], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![1], and ... Help![2], and you, you, you ...[1], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![2], and, ha, ha ...[1], and you, you, you ...[2], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[1], and, ha, ha ...[2], and I know I'll get there ... I will![1], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[2], and you can come, too[1], and I know I'll get there ... I will![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![1], and you can come, too[2], and ... Sod off - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![2], and my destiny ...[1], and ... Sod off - !!![2], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[1], and my destiny ...[2], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[1], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[2], and I mean -[1], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[2], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[1], and I mean -[2], and, uh ... never mind[1], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[2], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[1], and, uh ... never mind[2], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[1], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[2], and ... listen![1], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[2], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[1], and ... listen![2], and ... you know[1], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[2], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![1], and ... you know[2], and ... 'Yes!'[1], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![2], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![1], and ... 'Yes!'[2], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[1], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![2], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![1], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[2], and never never never - !!![1], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![2], and ... 54[3], and never never never - !!![2], and I would like to see it go[3], and - Go![3], and ... Could I spin it away???[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... Come on - !!! ... uh, go![3], and, no, no, no[3], and it will go go, eventually, yes, go! ... ... ... BUT(!) will it take me with it?[3], and ... 'No!'[3], and ... Cosmos, where are you?![3], and ... Help![3], and I'm holding on to what was said about ... 70, 80 ... even 90![3], and you, you, you ...[3], and, ha, ha ...[3], and if YOU(!) fear those numbers ... you obviously aren't prepared for life at the top of the mountain[3], and I know I'll get there ... I will![3], and you can come, too[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and I just want 54 to sod off, man![3], and ... Sod off - !!![3], and my destiny ...[3], and I'm waiting, waiting ...[3], and I've worked the way I was told to work ... through darkness and pain ... all that bad karma[3], and I mean -[3], and if anyone tries to stop me now, I'll -[3], and, uh ... never mind[3], and ... 'Leave it to the cosmos, Mikey ... the cosmos will settle the hashes of so many malevolent souls'[3], and thanks, Voice ... yeah, I'll focus on the poetry[3], and ... listen![3], and ... having my musical plans ruined or at least interrupted - and my blogging ... has put an incredible fire into -[3], and ... you know[3], and, and, and ... the words of my poems, yes![3], and ... 'Yes!'[3], and such awesome flames for the timid to gawp up - !!![3], and ... 'And the bold, too ... to admire!'[3], and it's all I have left, kooks ... ah, soon ... I'll be on the cliffs, and on the beaches ... I will never surrender![3], and never never never - !!![3], and

QR code payments

Uh.

PR email.

Basingstoke, UK - 21st August 2023: A new study from Juniper Research, the foremost experts in emerging payments markets, has found the volume of QR code payments in the leading Southeast Asian market will increase from 13 billion in 2023 to 90 billion in 2028.

Uh.

High growth in Southeast Asia and other developing markets is largely down to financial inclusivity that QR payments offer; enabling unbanked users to access digital payments. Conversely, Western markets have seen very limited adoption; highlighting the global divide in QR payment markets. 

Oh.

The report found national QR payment schemes, including India's UPI and Brazil's Pix, played a key role in encouraging -

Okay.

While international interoperability has been offered from payment providers like Alipay for years, national QR payment standards are now -

Okay.

Indonesia, Malaysia, and Thailand have already unified their payment standards; enabling businesses to accept payments from international visitors using their -

Okay.

Payment providers are advised to work closely with -

All right.

The adoption of QR payments overall in the west remains low. However, according to the research, the area of QR P2P bank transfers has -

All right.

And ... thanks, guys.

ENDS

...

Sometimes you can be damaged by demonic people

And there's nothing you can do about it

You've just got to live with the damage

And it can be the banality of evil like you wouldn't believe

They ain't special, believe me

That's not a poem, by the way.

Laters.

[No. 1,128] Make up your own title

If it means so much to you.

And hello[1], and a number is fine[1], and hello[2], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[1], and a number is fine[2], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[1], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[2], and ... 'Ha!'[1], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[2], and who cares what the squares want?![1], and ... 'Ha!'[2], and I mean ...[1], and who cares what the squares want?![2], and those ... anyway[1], and I mean ...[2], and yes, yes[1], and those ... anyway[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[1], and yes, yes[2], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[2], and uh[1], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[2], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![1], and uh[2], and, or ... it's nothing[1], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![2], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[1], and, or ... it's nothing[2], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[1], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[2], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[1], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[2], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[1], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[2], and didn't I? Yes![1], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[2], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[1], and didn't I? Yes![2], and you, you ... YOU(!)[1], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[2], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[1], and you, you ... YOU(!)[2], and it's important[1], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[2], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![1], and it's important[2], and, ha, ha ... uh[1], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![2], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[1], and, ha, ha ... uh[2], and I've made a decision![1], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[2], and ... 'Wow!'[1], and I've made a decision![2], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![1], and ... 'Wow!'[2], and ... 'Yippee!'[1], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![2], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![1], and ... 'Yippee!'[2], and, ha, ha, ha![1], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![2], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![1], and, ha, ha, ha![2], and, anyway ...[1], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![2], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[1], and, anyway ...[2], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![1], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[2], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![1], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![2], and, well, soft of[1], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![2], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[1], and, well, soft of[2], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![1], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[2], and I'm confused, ha![1], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![2], and never mind[1], and I'm confused, ha![2], and hello[3], and never mind[2], and a number is fine[3], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[3], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[3], and ... 'Ha!'[3], and who cares what the squares want?![3], and I mean ...[3], and those ... anyway[3], and yes, yes[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[3], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[3], and uh[3], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![3], and, or ... it's nothing[3], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[3], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[3], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[3], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[3], and didn't I? Yes![3], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[3], and you, you ... YOU(!)[3], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[3], and it's important[3], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![3], and, ha, ha ... uh[3], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[3], and I've made a decision![3], and ... 'Wow!'[3], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![3], and ... 'Yippee!'[3], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![3], and, ha, ha, ha![3], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![3], and, anyway ...[3], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[3], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![3], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![3], and, well, soft of[3], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[3], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![3], and I'm confused, ha![3], and never mind[3], and

And hello[1], and a number is fine[1], and hello[2], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[1], and a number is fine[2], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[1], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[2], and ... 'Ha!'[1], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[2], and who cares what the squares want?![1], and ... 'Ha!'[2], and I mean ...[1], and who cares what the squares want?![2], and those ... anyway[1], and I mean ...[2], and yes, yes[1], and those ... anyway[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[1], and yes, yes[2], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[2], and uh[1], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[2], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![1], and uh[2], and, or ... it's nothing[1], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![2], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[1], and, or ... it's nothing[2], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[1], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[2], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[1], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[2], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[1], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[2], and didn't I? Yes![1], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[2], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[1], and didn't I? Yes![2], and you, you ... YOU(!)[1], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[2], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[1], and you, you ... YOU(!)[2], and it's important[1], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[2], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![1], and it's important[2], and, ha, ha ... uh[1], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![2], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[1], and, ha, ha ... uh[2], and I've made a decision![1], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[2], and ... 'Wow!'[1], and I've made a decision![2], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![1], and ... 'Wow!'[2], and ... 'Yippee!'[1], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![2], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![1], and ... 'Yippee!'[2], and, ha, ha, ha![1], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![2], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![1], and, ha, ha, ha![2], and, anyway ...[1], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![2], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[1], and, anyway ...[2], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![1], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[2], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![1], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![2], and, well, soft of[1], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![2], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[1], and, well, soft of[2], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![1], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[2], and I'm confused, ha![1], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![2], and never mind[1], and I'm confused, ha![2], and hello[3], and never mind[2], and a number is fine[3], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[3], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[3], and ... 'Ha!'[3], and who cares what the squares want?![3], and I mean ...[3], and those ... anyway[3], and yes, yes[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[3], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[3], and uh[3], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![3], and, or ... it's nothing[3], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[3], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[3], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[3], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[3], and didn't I? Yes![3], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[3], and you, you ... YOU(!)[3], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[3], and it's important[3], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![3], and, ha, ha ... uh[3], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[3], and I've made a decision![3], and ... 'Wow!'[3], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![3], and ... 'Yippee!'[3], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![3], and, ha, ha, ha![3], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![3], and, anyway ...[3], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[3], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![3], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![3], and, well, soft of[3], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[3], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![3], and I'm confused, ha![3], and never mind[3], and

And hello[1], and a number is fine[1], and hello[2], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[1], and a number is fine[2], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[1], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[2], and ... 'Ha!'[1], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[2], and who cares what the squares want?![1], and ... 'Ha!'[2], and I mean ...[1], and who cares what the squares want?![2], and those ... anyway[1], and I mean ...[2], and yes, yes[1], and those ... anyway[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[1], and yes, yes[2], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[2], and uh[1], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[2], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![1], and uh[2], and, or ... it's nothing[1], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![2], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[1], and, or ... it's nothing[2], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[1], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[2], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[1], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[2], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[1], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[2], and didn't I? Yes![1], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[2], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[1], and didn't I? Yes![2], and you, you ... YOU(!)[1], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[2], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[1], and you, you ... YOU(!)[2], and it's important[1], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[2], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![1], and it's important[2], and, ha, ha ... uh[1], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![2], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[1], and, ha, ha ... uh[2], and I've made a decision![1], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[2], and ... 'Wow!'[1], and I've made a decision![2], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![1], and ... 'Wow!'[2], and ... 'Yippee!'[1], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![2], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![1], and ... 'Yippee!'[2], and, ha, ha, ha![1], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![2], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![1], and, ha, ha, ha![2], and, anyway ...[1], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![2], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[1], and, anyway ...[2], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![1], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[2], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![1], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![2], and, well, soft of[1], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![2], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[1], and, well, soft of[2], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![1], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[2], and I'm confused, ha![1], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![2], and never mind[1], and I'm confused, ha![2], and hello[3], and never mind[2], and a number is fine[3], and, kooks ... we're only spinning, ain't we?[3], and just a simple number ... what can go wrong?[3], and ... 'Ha!'[3], and who cares what the squares want?![3], and I mean ...[3], and those ... anyway[3], and yes, yes[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and it's not rocket science, is it?[3], and but ... it's a big effort, obviously[3], and uh[3], and the eight lines I need for my poem There's nothing ... Oh, that's rocket science![3], and, or ... it's nothing[3], and no, no, no ... it's definitely rocket science[3], and ... are YOU(!) confused?[3], and I already took those best ever eight lines from the song, you dig?[3], and ... 'What song? Nothing ... ?'[3], and didn't I? Yes![3], and, yes, yes ... Nothing[3], and you, you ... YOU(!)[3], and please try to keep up with all the latest developments[3], and it's important[3], and maybe one day you'll be able to win a prize in a pub quiz or something ... Who knows?![3], and, ha, ha ... uh[3], and actually actually ... a new development - !!! ... right here, right now ...[3], and I've made a decision![3], and ... 'Wow!'[3], and There's nothing will just be those best eight lines from Nothing - no new work to be done![3], and ... 'Yippee!'[3], and, yes, it's very easy if you try ... it's very easy to do nothing at all ... I must be a genius, eh?![3], and, ha, ha, ha![3], and what a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life![3], and, anyway ...[3], and have YOU(!) thought of a title yet for this conceptual?[3], and ... What?! ... Oh, come on![3], and you're very lazy, aren't you? / and I've just written a new poem, man - live! and ... eternal![3], and, well, soft of[3], and, actually ... I won't bother with it ... I'll leave it as a song[3], and or ... I'll do thirty-four lines![3], and I'm confused, ha![3], and never mind[3], and

LSEG Lipper: European fund industry trends - July 2023

Hello,

'Yippee! Detlef is back! Where has he been, boss?'

Er ... that wasn't Detlef, Voice. That was Hayley.

'But he's back though, isn't he? Detlef is back.'

Yeah, of course. He'll have something to say in a minute.

'But where has he been?!'

I don't know. Maybe a career break. I don't know.

'A career break?!'

Yes, Voice. These characters have career breaks, you know. To recharge their batteries or something. They're not like us.

'They don't know the meaning of hard work.'

Ha! Well, I wouldn't say that, man.

Anyway ...

Please see attached the LSEG Lipper European Fund Industry Trends report for July 2023, authored by Detlef Glow, Head of Lipper EMEA Research at LSEG.

Thanks, Hayley!

'She's new!'

Yeah.

We just like the key points though ...

Key points include:

Money Market funds (+€15.7 bn) were the best-selling asset type overall for the month, while bond funds were the best-selling asset type and for the year 2023 so far (+€111.3 bn).

Long-term mutual fund products (-€1.7 bn) posted estimated net outflows for July 2023 while this product category enjoyed inflows (+€50.7 bn) over the course of the first seven months of the year.

The overall fund flows for mutual funds and ETFs in Europe in July amounted to estimated net inflows (+€14.0 bn), while the European fund industry enjoyed overall inflows (+€72.9 bn) for the year 2023 so far.

Money Market EUR (+€9.7 bn) was the best-selling Lipper Global Classification for the month, while Equity Global (+€37.5 bn) was the best-selling Lipper Global Classification for the year 2023 so far.

BlackRock was the best-selling fund promoter in Europe for July (+€6.9 bn), as well as for the first seven months of 2023 (+€50.7 bn).

 

Great!

She's gone back to the old way of doing it. No bullet points. I had to edit those out with that other guy.

'He was getting flash, wasn't he?'

Ha! If it ain't broke, don't fix it. That's what I've always said.

Anyway ...

We have the big man himself now.

'Detlef!'

Ladies and gentlemen, he's back!

Mr Detlef Glow - !!! ... ... ...

Detlef?

Er ...

Detlef?

'Where is he?!'

Christ! He's not in the email!

'What?!'

He must be in the attachment.

'Well, open it then, boss.'

No.

'Why not?'

I don't like this new way of doing things.

'Uh.'

The old guy - I can't remember his name - used to quote Detlef in the actual email.

'Never mind.'

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

[No. 1,127]

And the latest[1], and come on listen and I will tell you[1], and the latest[2], and uh[1], and come on listen and I will tell you[2], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[1], and uh[2], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[1], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[2], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[1], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[2], and it happens[1], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[2], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[1], and it happens[2], and words are strange just as strange as music[1], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[2], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[1], and words are strange just as strange as music[2], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[1], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[2], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[1], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[2], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[1], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[2], and why why why[1], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[2], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[1], and why why why[2], and long or short we need both[1], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[2], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[1], and long or short we need both[2], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[1], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[2], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[1], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[2], and but but but[1], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[2], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[1], and but but but[2], and in an emergency maybe[1], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[2], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[1], and in an emergency maybe[2], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[1], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[2], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[1], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[2], and oh God[1], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[2], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[1], and oh God[2], and such a romantic life on the edge[1], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[2], and Christ[1], and such a romantic life on the edge[2], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[1], and Christ[2], and never ever mind eh[1], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[2], and the latest[3], and never ever mind eh[2], and come on listen and I will tell you[3], and uh[3], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[3], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[3], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[3], and it happens[3], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[3], and words are strange just as strange as music[3], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[3], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[3], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[3], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[3], and why why why[3], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[3], and long or short we need both[3], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[3], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[3], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[3], and but but but[3], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[3], and in an emergency maybe[3], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[3], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[3], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[3], and oh God[3], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[3], and such a romantic life on the edge[3], and Christ[3], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[3], and never ever mind eh[3], and

And the latest[1], and come on listen and I will tell you[1], and the latest[2], and uh[1], and come on listen and I will tell you[2], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[1], and uh[2], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[1], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[2], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[1], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[2], and it happens[1], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[2], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[1], and it happens[2], and words are strange just as strange as music[1], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[2], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[1], and words are strange just as strange as music[2], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[1], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[2], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[1], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[2], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[1], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[2], and why why why[1], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[2], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[1], and why why why[2], and long or short we need both[1], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[2], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[1], and long or short we need both[2], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[1], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[2], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[1], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[2], and but but but[1], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[2], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[1], and but but but[2], and in an emergency maybe[1], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[2], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[1], and in an emergency maybe[2], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[1], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[2], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[1], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[2], and oh God[1], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[2], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[1], and oh God[2], and such a romantic life on the edge[1], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[2], and Christ[1], and such a romantic life on the edge[2], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[1], and Christ[2], and never ever mind eh[1], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[2], and the latest[3], and never ever mind eh[2], and come on listen and I will tell you[3], and uh[3], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[3], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[3], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[3], and it happens[3], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[3], and words are strange just as strange as music[3], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[3], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[3], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[3], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[3], and why why why[3], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[3], and long or short we need both[3], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[3], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[3], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[3], and but but but[3], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[3], and in an emergency maybe[3], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[3], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[3], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[3], and oh God[3], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[3], and such a romantic life on the edge[3], and Christ[3], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[3], and never ever mind eh[3], and

And the latest[1], and come on listen and I will tell you[1], and the latest[2], and uh[1], and come on listen and I will tell you[2], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[1], and uh[2], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[1], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[2], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[1], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[2], and it happens[1], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[2], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[1], and it happens[2], and words are strange just as strange as music[1], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[2], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[1], and words are strange just as strange as music[2], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[1], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[2], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[1], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[2], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[1], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[2], and why why why[1], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[2], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[1], and why why why[2], and long or short we need both[1], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[2], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[1], and long or short we need both[2], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[1], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[2], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[1], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[2], and but but but[1], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[2], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[1], and but but but[2], and in an emergency maybe[1], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[2], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[1], and in an emergency maybe[2], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[1], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[2], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[1], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[2], and oh God[1], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[2], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[1], and oh God[2], and such a romantic life on the edge[1], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[2], and Christ[1], and such a romantic life on the edge[2], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[1], and Christ[2], and never ever mind eh[1], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[2], and the latest[3], and never ever mind eh[2], and come on listen and I will tell you[3], and uh[3], and and and nothing in particular actually except I got five poems now the latest[3], and sixteen lines very nice traditional[3], and yeah the latest just started off a lot like this conceptual random words in a file that became something[3], and it happens[3], and a file for rough poetry wasnt even expecting a proper poem to be completely honest with you[3], and words are strange just as strange as music[3], and though I could think of a title for it yes but not for this[3], and I guess Im too tired or lazy or just plain exhausted aRound here in this eternal moment you dig[3], and we dont need titles when were dizzy do we[3], and I reckon that short poems can be written in a day or two and I like short ones[3], and why why why[3], and because because because short poems can get stuck in peoples heads man[3], and long or short we need both[3], and listen listen listen I just remembered the other day[3], and when I was thirteen or fourteen I sent an exercise book of handwritten poems to Faber & Faber ha ha ha[3], and crazy crazy crazy kid obviously boy and shaman[3], and but but but[3], and if you want to you can email them six poems now and they will read them apparently which is great[3], and in an emergency maybe[3], and maybe when Im lost on the cliffs[3], and maybe when Im crashed out on the beach[3], and maybe when the Owlman is chasing me down a lane[3], and oh God[3], and maybe then Ill find a few pennies a pound or two for an internet cafe to send six poems from such a life[3], and such a romantic life on the edge[3], and Christ[3], and does anyone understand me or am I spinning words into the darkness of dead minds and dead hearts[3], and never ever mind eh[3], and

The foremost experts in fintech

The foremost?

The foremost?

The foremost?

'Stop it, boss.'

The foremost?

The foremost?

The foremost?

'Stop it!'

I can't, Voice!

The foremost?

The foremost?

The foremost?

'Uh.'

Uh. Ha!

​

Basingstoke, UK - 7th August 2023: A new study from Juniper Research, the foremost experts in fintech, has found global revenue from BaaP (Banking-as-a-Platform) services will increase to $49 billion globally in 2028, from $4 billion in 2023. 

Yeah, yeah. It's two weeks old. So what? 'Haven't you got any other PR emails, boss?' Yes. I've got them. In the PR folder. I'll look at them ...

Tomorrow, and

Tomorrow, and

Tomorrow

You dig?

Anyway ...

The study argued BaaP can help traditional banks regain their competitive edge against neobanks. Through collaboration with innovative vendors, banks can offer new services from partners, including embedded insurance, lifestyle offers with leading brands, or access to HR services for small businesses. 

Right.

What Is Banking-as-a-Platform?

How am I supposed to know?

Juniper Research defines Banking-as-a-Platform as: "A business model that enables third-party partners to build products and services for bank customers, most commonly a technology company that can provide APIs while the bank manages data exchange, oversees authentication and ensures compliance."

Who said that?

'Juniper.'

What, the Roman god?!

'Maybe.'

Absolutely ridiculous. And a disgrace.

[Juniper, Jupiter ...]

'What are you going to do?'

In the name of Zeus, let's finish this email - !!!

The study argues banks can utilise partnerships with industry leaders to build upon their core banking model; helping them compete with fintechs by offering more user-friendly services. Compared with traditional acquisitions, BaaP partnerships are highly flexible and can be easier to integrate, as banks transition to API-focused models. By offering a wide range of services via BaaP, banks can gain a competitive edge without having to stray from their core business.

Come on!

Digital Banks Must Capitalise on BaaP Marketplaces.

Must they? Really?

COME ON - !!!

According to the report, banking marketplaces are the most effective way for banks to adapt to the digital age; helping them create financial services ecosystems that offer personalised customer experiences, without developing services themselves. For example, Revolut has extensively expanded its lifestyle offerings in-app; creating its own ecosystem of services, without taking on the costs traditional banks have faced in expanding services. In turn, customers benefit from innovative solutions that are tailored to their needs; increasing satisfaction and improving the stickiness of their banking relationships. 

COME ON - !!!

Juniper Research recommends banks evaluate which services are core, and which services can be replaced by working with innovative third parties; enabling banks to improve services being offered, while reducing costs in a difficult economic climate.

Well, okay.

I mean ...

Whatever.

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

'Stop it.'

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

'Stop it.'

ENDS

ENDS

ENDS

'This guy.'

Shut up, Voice!

Laters.

'Bye!'