Wednesday 4 October 2017

No Christmas this year!

That's what Jinksy says. He sent me an email. 'Bloody hell! He's just like Scrooge, boss.' Well, it's not his fault, Voice. Look -

Royal Mail's workers have voted to take strike action over a change to their pensions. With Christmas fast approaching many people who only mail parcels at Christmas could have their parcels delayed by the strike. ParcelHero says its vital people are made aware of courier alternatives; but warns concerted strike action will lead to delays and cancellations across the delivery network.

Royal Mail, you see? The government should never have sold it.

As the Communication Workers Union (CWU) Royal Mail workers vote by 89.1% to take strike action in a dispute over changes to their pension scheme, the parcel price comparison site ParcelHero says that the timing couldn't be worse for everyday people who only send parcels at Christmas time. And any kind of industrial action will stretch retailer's delivery networks just as e-commerce overtakes in-store Christmas shopping for the first time.

Well, I won't be sending any parcels. 'What about people's presents, boss?' Stuff people's presents, man! No Christmas! Jinksy says so! / Let's hear from the great man himself -

"For some families, the timing of any strike or work to rule could mean that Christmas is cancelled by this action," says David Jinks MILT, ParcelHero's Head of Consumer Research. "If industrial action goes into the seasonal period it will have a huge impact. Even if the strikes are limited; it will have significant  consequences across the industry as other delivery companies try to absorb the extra volumes at this hugely busy period."

You see? 'Christ! I think our David has some explaining to do.' Why? It's not his fault, or problem. 'Well, I just think he will want to explain. It's a gut feeling I have.' Ha! You've been reading further down the email, Voice. Look, reader(s) -

Explains David: "People who perhaps only send a parcel to their loved ones once a year to places such as Australia will already be buying and planning sending their presents. It is these people, those most unfamiliar with the many alternative courier options to Royal Mail such as UPS and DHL, who will be hardest hit by any strike."

Oh, I see. Our David, our Jinksy, is trying to drum up business for other firms. 'Clever!' Well, he's not stupid, is he? 'I wonder if he has a favourite firm in mind though.' Ha! / So, we'll let him continue -

Continues David: "Additionally, the worry is that last year Royal Mail delivered 130million parcels at Christmas. That's a huge volume facing courier services in the UK if the Royal Mail takes any kind of industrial action over the Christmas period. Last year e-commerce overtook in-store sales at Christmas for the first time; online Christmas spending was a whopping £133bn. All these shipments need to be delivered as well as presents being sent by friends and families. Any Royal Mail strike action - however limited - will lead to significant stretching of the entire industry over Christmas."

Okay, okay. Now, there's more of this. He continues again. 'And he explains again.' Yes, he explains again. But ... I'm afraid life's too short. So, we'll just finish with something he "says" at the end -

Says David: "By using a price comparison site like ParcelHero people will realize how much more cheaply and conveniently parcels can be sent these days. On average using a broker such as ParcelHero parcel mailings are 60% cheaper than using the Post Office. Can the Royal Mail bounce back from that?"

Ha! 'Ha!' Ha! What a character, eh? I'm not endorsing anything. I don't do endorsements. But you've got to take your hat off to him, haven't you, dear reader(s)?

ENDS

Yes, that's the ends, that is.

...

Anything else? Politics? I don't discuss politics. I've got too much class. However, the Tory conference? Jesus! I think they're finished, man. I mean, the youngest conservative in the country is sixty-seven or something. 'Ha! And they own the Brexit apocalypse now, don't they, boss?' Yes, they do. / Never mind.

Laters.