According to our Jinksy. Look! -
Today's Office of National Statistics (ONS) Retail results for February show a 13.7% rise in annual online sales, with e-commerce purchases now accounting for 17.2% of all UK retail sales. British shoppers spent £1,230 million online this February, compared with £1,193 million in January.
The e-commerce delivery expert ParcelHero says that, in contrast, the High Street could only muster a slight rise of 0.8% over January's poor results: resulting in an overall decrease of High Street sales of 0.4% in the first three months of this year.
ParcelHero's Head of Consumer Research, David Jinks says: "Online stores are continuing to eat High Street stores' lunch, and there seems no end to the problems facing many famous retail names."
Okay, okay. Okay. What can be done about it, dear reader(s)? Probably nothing. 'Boss, these high street stores could all move online in a bigger way until ... they don't need the stores no more.' What?! That's still the death of the high street, Voice, ain't it? 'Yeah, but they'd still be in business, wouldn't they?' Christ! But, but, but ... all the stores would be shut, idiot! Millions of people would lose their jobs. And not everyone will be able to get a new job in an Amazon-style warehouse. And who wants that anyway? We've all heard the stories of workers having babies in toilets. It's hell on earth.
Right. Concludes Jinksy -
Concludes David: "The likes of Toys R Us never really enthused internet shoppers. Their online offering failed to capture the excitement of the stores in their heyday and was never an automatic choice for toy shoppers. It looks like it's being left to department stores such as John Lewis to show how a High Street store with a reputation for quality service can carry that over into its online offering. Other retailers have to get this right, or this year's list of failures could become catastrophic."
Yes, catastrophic. Catastrophic sounds like a reasonable prediction to me. / Face facts, reader(s), friend(s), the future just isn't very bright for ordinary people. You're either going to be Elon Musk in a spaceship, or some nameless, faceless slave in a godforsaken warehouse. Take your pick! 'Ha! What about you, boss?' Me? I'm going to be a rock and roll shaman. A rock star extraordinaire! I'll be rockin' in the free world, son, or what remains of it.
...
Well, it's the end of another week, blog fan(s). Anything else? Er, let's stick with music. I've changed my mind about my music again. 'Bloody hell!' Listen! I mean, my guitar playing, you dig? 'Oh.' I mean, it's a waste of time trying to become a guitar wizard. 'Tell me about it!' The thing is, I keep discovering these really amazing players on YouTube, whom ... no one has ever heard of. A few of them are even better than Jimi Hendrix(!!!), and ... no one has ever heard of them. 'What about other guitar wizards, Mikey? They must have heard of them.' Well, uh, obviously, Voice, these wizards all know each other. 'Yeah, right.' BUT NO CIVILIANS HAVE EVER HEARD OF THEM!!! 'Oh.' So, I reckon it's best to stay on the Noel Gallagher/Kurt Cobain level as a guitarist, and just concentrate on writing great songs, man. That's my advice to myself.
Later(s), crocodile(s)! Have a nice weekend!
Today's Office of National Statistics (ONS) Retail results for February show a 13.7% rise in annual online sales, with e-commerce purchases now accounting for 17.2% of all UK retail sales. British shoppers spent £1,230 million online this February, compared with £1,193 million in January.
The e-commerce delivery expert ParcelHero says that, in contrast, the High Street could only muster a slight rise of 0.8% over January's poor results: resulting in an overall decrease of High Street sales of 0.4% in the first three months of this year.
ParcelHero's Head of Consumer Research, David Jinks says: "Online stores are continuing to eat High Street stores' lunch, and there seems no end to the problems facing many famous retail names."
Okay, okay. Okay. What can be done about it, dear reader(s)? Probably nothing. 'Boss, these high street stores could all move online in a bigger way until ... they don't need the stores no more.' What?! That's still the death of the high street, Voice, ain't it? 'Yeah, but they'd still be in business, wouldn't they?' Christ! But, but, but ... all the stores would be shut, idiot! Millions of people would lose their jobs. And not everyone will be able to get a new job in an Amazon-style warehouse. And who wants that anyway? We've all heard the stories of workers having babies in toilets. It's hell on earth.
Right. Concludes Jinksy -
Concludes David: "The likes of Toys R Us never really enthused internet shoppers. Their online offering failed to capture the excitement of the stores in their heyday and was never an automatic choice for toy shoppers. It looks like it's being left to department stores such as John Lewis to show how a High Street store with a reputation for quality service can carry that over into its online offering. Other retailers have to get this right, or this year's list of failures could become catastrophic."
Yes, catastrophic. Catastrophic sounds like a reasonable prediction to me. / Face facts, reader(s), friend(s), the future just isn't very bright for ordinary people. You're either going to be Elon Musk in a spaceship, or some nameless, faceless slave in a godforsaken warehouse. Take your pick! 'Ha! What about you, boss?' Me? I'm going to be a rock and roll shaman. A rock star extraordinaire! I'll be rockin' in the free world, son, or what remains of it.
...
Well, it's the end of another week, blog fan(s). Anything else? Er, let's stick with music. I've changed my mind about my music again. 'Bloody hell!' Listen! I mean, my guitar playing, you dig? 'Oh.' I mean, it's a waste of time trying to become a guitar wizard. 'Tell me about it!' The thing is, I keep discovering these really amazing players on YouTube, whom ... no one has ever heard of. A few of them are even better than Jimi Hendrix(!!!), and ... no one has ever heard of them. 'What about other guitar wizards, Mikey? They must have heard of them.' Well, uh, obviously, Voice, these wizards all know each other. 'Yeah, right.' BUT NO CIVILIANS HAVE EVER HEARD OF THEM!!! 'Oh.' So, I reckon it's best to stay on the Noel Gallagher/Kurt Cobain level as a guitarist, and just concentrate on writing great songs, man. That's my advice to myself.
Later(s), crocodile(s)! Have a nice weekend!
