Omada Capital has given $200 million to Qbasis Invest!!!

And it gets worse! You won't believe this, dear reader(s). WHY?! Just so Qbasis Invest can buy ... a black swan of all things! I mean, I mean ... Unbelievable, eh???!!! / Firstly, why is this black swan so expensive? (Maybe Qbasis is going to get a herd of black swans? I don't know.) Secondly, if Omada Capital has the money to waste on such nonsense - and it does - how about sending a bit of money my way, yeah? Dollars or pounds. I ain't fussy, man. A couple of million, that's all. I'm not greedy like our Flo, you know.

But seriously! Come on, reader(s)! $200 million! The whole world has gone fucking insane!!! / Obviously, I've never heard of these firms. BUT(!) ... Omada Capital is a London-based private wealth manager, if you can believe that. Ha! And, er, by engineering integrated financing solutions and operational expertise, it clearly offers an alternative to the outsized financial service institutions still struggling with inherent conflicts, legacy issues, degenerates, misaligned incentives, and rigid processes. Also, its senior team has long-standing experience of the international capital markets with complementary skills covering equity and debt capital. / And, well ... Qbasis Invest?! Er, yeah, it's a ... hedge fund, Christ(!) ... founded by Florian Wagner in 2005. He's Austrian or something. Never mind. We don't mind, do we?

HOWEVER(!) ... / / / Why this "Florian" character wants or needs a black swan is anyone's guess. I suppose it's nice to have a dream, but why is Omada Capital bankrolling this guy's fantasy? / ... / There's something satanic going on, you mark my words. In the old days, Jack Pickles would have been involved in this. Up to his neck! Fortunately, he doesn't have a neck any more. Our Jack is dead. And he's staying dead! I don't care how much money "they" offer me to bring him back to life. MONEY CAN'T BUY EVERYTHING(!!!). [Flo would do well to read this blog of mine and learn a thing or two, you dig, man? YOU(!), Flo, YOU(!)!!!]

...

Yes, I'm writing in the night again - for my sins. / Actually, I want to go out tomorrow/today ... in the sunshine! Oh, I'm still in a holiday mood. I want to have fun like ... the Aviva Investors mob. Life is one big holiday for that lot ...

Music? I'm listening to Eno's Apollo. No surprises. We don't want any surprises, do we?

GOOD NIGHT. / GOOD MORNING.

What's been happening in the financial world? Anything exciting?

Haven't they solved the problem of Greece yet, dear reader(s)? (I've been away for a week, as you know.) Christ! How much time do they need? 'Things have got worse, boss.' Really? Dear oh dear! 'All the banks are shut, and there's no money left.'

Well, well ... / There is no way Greece will ever be able to repay its debts. 'So ... ?' So, just let it keep the money. 'What?! And what about the other countries, man, like Portugal and Ireland?' Er ... let them keep the money, too, Voice.

I've been working on this solution: Let everyone in the world keep all the money they owe! 'What about America?' Yes, America, as well. America owes more than anyone. Trillions! But who cares? We need to start again. We need to return to living in huts and caves.

It came to me in Cornwall. / I was trying to become one with Nature, you know? But it was difficult. Every time I looked around me it was like I was staring at a postcard. It didn't feel real, you dig? 'Damn!' However, one afternoon I was a bit tired so I sat down on the grass in a place they call The Island and I closed my eyes and I had a mystical experience, of sorts. 'Really, boss?' Believe! I was half-asleep, yeah? I was aware of the warmth of the sun, and the wind that was blowing a-ROUND(!) me. But that's all. Everything else was gone. (Even my mind.) It was like being in a hot tornado.

Anyway, after about fifteen minutes, I "woke up" and said to myself: Mikey, there is nothing to worry about, son. 'Brilliant!' All my stress had gone, too.

So, that's what the Greek people need to do, man. 'A hot tornado! One with Nature, with a clear head!' Yes. The creditors can whistle for their fucking money!

...


Anything else? Hedge funds opening, closing? Oh, wait until tomorrow, reader(s). I'm sure there'll be something. 'There always is.'

Lunch? Cheese and onion pasty, er, no, egg sandwich. 'Ha!' I forgot where I was for a minute ...

Greece?

Is the Greece thing still going on? 'All that debt nonsense? Yes, afraid so.' Jesus H. Christ! Haven't they sorted it out yet? I can't believe these guys! ['Those guys.' Whatever.] And why haven't they called me? 'Er ... why would they call you, boss?' Because I might be able to do something. You know, come up with a solution. Well, maybe. 'Yeah, right. Stick to the guitar playing, Mikey. That's what you're good at.' Voice, I am the world's foremost financial shaman, remember? 'I haven't forgotten, son.'

Cheeky git! / Uh, I wouldn't want to help the Greeks, anyway. It's not my problem. It doesn't affect me ... in my dream world.

Guitar? 'Acoustic or electric?' I had a go on my Telecaster earlier, and I was playing a bit like Keith Richards. 'Electric. Yeah, I heard.' He's not the greatest guitarist ... he is pretty good though, and he has a nice way of mixing rhythm with small bursts of lead playing - which is what I was doing. I'm definitely making progress, man. I'm not a groovy cat like Keith yet, but it's only a matter of time. 'You -'

Oh, YOU(!) ... gotta keep believing!


Update Monday 22nd: I'm taking the week off, blog fans. Going to Cornwall. I'll see you next week (Tuesday, probably).

[No. 326] Let's spin some sense into Nick Kirrage

Oh dear! Nick's luck has run out.

And the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[1], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[1], and the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[2], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![1], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[2], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![1], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![2], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[1], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![2], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[1], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![1], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[2], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![2], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[1], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[2], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[1], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[2], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![1], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[1], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![2], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[2], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[1], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[2], and the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[3], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[2], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[3], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![3], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![3], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[3], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![3], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[3], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[3], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[3], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[3], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[3], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[3], and

And the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[1], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[1], and the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[2], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![1], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[2], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![1], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![2], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[1], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![2], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[1], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![1], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[2], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![2], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[1], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[2], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[1], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[2], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![1], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[1], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![2], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[2], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[1], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[2], and the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[3], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[2], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[3], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![3], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![3], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[3], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![3], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[3], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[3], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[3], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[3], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[3], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[3], and

And the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[1], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[1], and the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[2], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![1], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[2], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![1], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![2], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[1], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![2], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[1], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![1], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[2], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![2], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[1], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[2], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[1], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[2], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![1], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[1], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![2], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[2], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[1], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[2], and the harder I spin a-ROUND the luckier I get / Don't YOU(!) ... feel the same?[3], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[2], and our Nick ... here he is! ... so confused ... away from his funds ... and in a strange land[3], and why would someone work at Schroders and not Aviva Investors?![3], and nature? I AM NATURE!!![3], and YOU(!) ... have got to know ... how to live ... or what's the point? / Why are you ... here - ?[3], and I'd like to nurture our Nick ... / ... in the old days I would have taken him into the desert[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, it's all ice cream in the park for some of us![3], and is this ... really No. 326? / Where do I find the time?[3], and NICK(!) ... please, my friend, make the most of this / not every fund manager gets a number done on him, you know[3], and if you're DIZZY(!) you're LUCKY(!) / just a personal point of view, you understand[3], and NICK(!) ... oh, man, please say you UNDERSTAND!!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... (?) / Come on, it beats working for a living[3], and pause - if you need to, yeah?[3], and YOU(!) ... make your own luck in this world / It was your choice to follow me, man[3], and

Is Nick Kirrage a lucky punk?

Does Nick Kirrage feel lucky? Is he going to make my day? 'Eh? What's this all about, Mikey?' Nick Kirrage is a Schroders fund manager, and he's talking about nature and nurture and the luck of fund managers. 'Are you sure, boss? I can't hear him.' Not here, man. There. 'Oh, Fundweb. I get you. It all makes sense now.' Does it?!

Oh, my dear reader(s), read the article, please! What do you make of it? What do you make of this?! -

In a statement that I'm sure many will find refreshingly honest, Nick suggests "successful people massively underplay the role that luck has". He goes on to explain that, in many walks of life, possessing talent is often necessary but not sufficient to guarantee success. "You need to not only work hard and possess talent, but also to benefit from some serendipity in the sense that your boss notices, or that the right opportunity opens up at the right time".

Christ. 'Ha!' I don't like it at all. Not one little bit.

Let's think of it in terms of music (something I understand). Were The Beatles lucky? Was David Bowie lucky? Some people will say YES! I have to say ... NO! / The Beatles sweated for years in clubs like The Cavern. (I think they played The Cavern close to three hundred times.) After Brian Epstein took an interest in them they were turned down by every major record company in the country. (Not just Decca.) Where's the luck? I can only see hard work and struggle. Eventually, they got a deal with Parlophone/EMI. Luck? There was no luck involved, man. They just wouldn't go away and George Martin finally noticed them. But that's not the end of the story. Lesser talents might have needed "luck" to build a career from that point, but Lennon and McCartney became great songwriters. Perhaps the greatest. (Bob Dylan is great but his lyrics dominate at the expense of his music.) So ... fuck luck, yeah? / And David Bowie? He was releasing records for eight years before Ziggy Stardust made him a ... STAR(!), man. And if he hadn't had "made" it in 1972, he would have made it in 1974 or 1976 or 1979, you dig? 'Fuckin' A!' And The Beatles would have made it in 1966 or 1969. 'Or 1970.' The secret is to be more talented than most (or all) of your competitors and to never give up.

So I don't understand Nick Kirrage at all. 'What are you going to do about it, boss?' Take a wild guess, Voice. 'Er ... write a conceptual post about him? No. 326 - !!!' Yes, I'm going to take our Nick for a spin after lunch. I'm going to spin some sense into him.

Firebreak Capital?

Well, well ... / YES! This is what I like to see! A new hedge fund with a cool name. 'Yippee!' By the way, dear reader(s), I normally don't care for all the emails sent to me by PR people. Most of them are irrelevant rubbish. ['Tell me about it. I have to go through them.' I am telling you about it!] But yesterday I received the "Firebreak" email and was excited ... immediately - !!! Despite the break bit. 'Ha! It's the word "Fire", ain't it, boss? You love it! Always gets you going.' Well, it's shamanic, Voice. [Blood and Fire Capital would have been better though.] And it will come as no surprise to YOU(!) ... that - 'Me?!' Them! 'Oh. Right. Them!' Shut up! [Where am I? 'Here!'] As I was saying, it will come as no surprise to YOU(!) ... that Firebreak Capital has been founded by two ex-Goldman Sachs guys, Jonathan Egol (CIO) and Robert Allard (CEO). / ... / NOW(!), I've been going through my archive and it seems that our Jonathan was once a target for the evil ... JACK PICKLES - !!! 'Oh dear. Shit!' Chill, man. It's not a problem, Voice. I was Jack Pickles, remember? 'Ah, of course. In your demonic days!' Yeah. So it's really not a problem. /... / 'Robert Allard? What about him?' Er ... Robert, Robert, my archive suggests he might be a financial shaman, Voice. 'Wow! I wouldn't be surprised if he came up with the name for their hedge fund then.' Maybe. I'm looking at his picture in the email, and he's wearing glasses. 'Oh.' I haven't personally known any shamans who have worn glasses, man. 'You must have!' Well ... [It could be a "Superman" situation. 'Nietzsche?' No, that cretin who flies around all over the place. 'Eh?' Clark Kent. 'Yes, he wears glasses.'] Never mind. The old days ... / But - 'Boss, get this(!!!): the email says Robbie is available to speak to you!' Robbie?! Robbie who?! 'Robert Allard, man. If you want more information.' Ha! If I want more information, son, I'll just break into his consciousness while he's sleeping and help myself, you dig? 'Of course.' Come on, man! I ain't no square fucking journalist with a notepad. 'No, of course not. Uh. Sorry, Mikey. What an idiot I am!' Shorthand, eh? You make me laugh!

Er ... / Oh, one more thing, my dear reader(s): Firebreak Capital hasn't actually been launched yet. 'Ha! Surprise, surprise!' Christ! Give them a chance, Voice. It'll launch later this year. 'Okay.' It's not pie in the sky. 'No?' These guys aren't amateurs. It's going to be a private debt fund. See if you can dig this -

With the rapid evolution in financial services, Firebreak aims to be an alternative balance sheet in the illiquid lending and investment sector, leveraging the emerging disruptive trends in consumer and commercial direct lending, as well as providing private credit, asset-backed and structured finance solutions. Firebreak will prospectively add cutting-edge technology that delivers insight and an efficient approach to its private debt strategy.

'No mention of financial shamanism, boss.' So? They're not going to put it in an email, are they? I mean, I'm not the only one who received it. Plenty of "straights" would have got the email as well. Robbie and Jon don't want to scare people off.

Anyway, that's enough!

[No. 325] It's all too much information, man

I don't need to know anything about finance. YOU(!) don't need to know anything about finance. We should find a nice cave.

And we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[1], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[1], and we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[2], and I ain't begging for no news, man![1], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[2], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[1], and I ain't begging for no news, man![2], and where's my guitar?[1], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[2], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[1], and where's my guitar?[2], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[1], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[2], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[1], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[2], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[1], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[2], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![1], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[2], and their weak souls are with us![1], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![2], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![1], and their weak souls are with us![2], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![1], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![2], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[1], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![2], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[1], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[2], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[1], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[2], and we have no mercy!!![1], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[2], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[1], and we have no mercy!!![2], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[1], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[2], and we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[3], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[2], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[3], and I ain't begging for no news, man![3], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[3], and where's my guitar?[3], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[3], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[3], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[3], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[3], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![3], and their weak souls are with us![3], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![3], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![3], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[3], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[3], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[3], and we have no mercy!!![3], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[3], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[3], and

And we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[1], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[1], and we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[2], and I ain't begging for no news, man![1], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[2], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[1], and I ain't begging for no news, man![2], and where's my guitar?[1], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[2], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[1], and where's my guitar?[2], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[1], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[2], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[1], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[2], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[1], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[2], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![1], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[2], and their weak souls are with us![1], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![2], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![1], and their weak souls are with us![2], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![1], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![2], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[1], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![2], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[1], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[2], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[1], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[2], and we have no mercy!!![1], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[2], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[1], and we have no mercy!!![2], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[1], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[2], and we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[3], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[2], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[3], and I ain't begging for no news, man![3], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[3], and where's my guitar?[3], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[3], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[3], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[3], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[3], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![3], and their weak souls are with us![3], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![3], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![3], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[3], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[3], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[3], and we have no mercy!!![3], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[3], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[3], and

And we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[1], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[1], and we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[2], and I ain't begging for no news, man![1], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[2], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[1], and I ain't begging for no news, man![2], and where's my guitar?[1], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[2], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[1], and where's my guitar?[2], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[1], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[2], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[1], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[2], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[1], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[2], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![1], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[2], and their weak souls are with us![1], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![2], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![1], and their weak souls are with us![2], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![1], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![2], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[1], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![2], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[1], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[2], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[1], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[2], and we have no mercy!!![1], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[2], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[1], and we have no mercy!!![2], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[1], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[2], and we could be living the dream ... if only the financial media would get out of our faces with THE BULLSHIT(!)[3], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[2], and Bloomberg, Reuters ... they know NOTHING(!) that we need to know[3], and I ain't begging for no news, man![3], and slaves listening to slaves working for masters working for the devil: ONE BIG FUCKING COMEDY!!! / Believe me ...[3], and where's my guitar?[3], and if only they could tell the TRUTH(!) for once in their miserable lives ...[3], and here ... is the truth! / and three chords[3], and EVERYTHING(!) we need to know is in our hearts / and it all comes to us from the cosmos, you dig?[3], and God is watching / and He is taking notes[3], and I know I'll be all right / and YOU(!) ... will be all right with me / HOLD ON TIGHT![3], and their weak souls are with us![3], and this ... is our moment, spinner(s)! / and this - !!! / We've got them so confused!!![3], and ... PUT THE BOOT IN!!![3], and this - !!! / I am shaking with JOY(!) ...[3], and we are scaring the bull-SHIT(!) out of them / Oh, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND[3], and hair and teeth and eyes a mess of sick humanity bleeding and crying NOW(!) - so?[3], and we have no mercy!!![3], and they don't even know ... what DIZZY(!) all a-ROUND is, ah, don't even know what it means[3], and our HEAVEN is their HELL[3], and

Charlie Aitken? Aitken Investment Management?

Er ... this is a, er, story from Australia, for some reason. 'What?! Why?!' Don't ask me why. I just feel like going wild today, man. 'Oh, you're a crazy cat, boss!'

Yeah. / Anyway, this Charlie character is getting $150 million from Australian billionaire Kerry Stokes. (Or his family or something. 'Family office.' Whatever.) American dollars. And that's half the money he feels he needs to launch his new hedge fund. ('Ha! These people, Mikey! Unbelievable!' I know.) The rest will be coming from smaller investors. Deadbeats, you might say. ('I wouldn't say that. You should be such a deadbeat.' Shut up, Voice!) There is only one question I want answered: What is wrong with Australian dollars, man?!

Never mind. Who cares, eh? / Apparently, this Charlie character of ours is famous in Australia. 'Famous?!' In financial circles, as it were. 'Oh.' But it's all news to me. I only "discovered" him this morning. So I went to Bloomberg, looking for some answers ... 'Ha!' Do you know what they told me, dear reader(s)? 'Tell them, boss.' Well, Bloomberg told me: This person is connected to 0 Board Members in 0 different organizations across 1 different industries. 'Ha!' WTF?! 'Ha, ha, ha!' I mean, where do these Bloomberg pricks get off with "information" like that?

I suppose it doesn't matter ... / Obviously, it goes without saying that I wish Mr Aitken all the best. It's not every day that someone launches a new hedge fund. 'Yes it is. And the fund hasn't been launched yet, boss. Wait until next month to wish him all the best.' Next month?! By next month I will have forgotten all about Charlie and his blasted fund. Idiot!!! / Charlie, if you're reading this: Good luck, son!

...

Er ... what else? / 'Music!' Music? I'm listening to Sir Van Morrison's Astral Weeks. (I ain't gonna call him "Sir" if I ever meet him.) This album sounds best walking down a lane in Cornwall on a sunny day. 'Really?' Take my word for it, Voice. I'm talking from experience.

Guitar? 'YES!!! Guitar!' I played for three hours yesterday but hardly noticed it. What I mean is, reader(s), it's not an effort any more, you dig? All the rhythms and the riffs ... 'In the free world?' Oh, it's like shooting fish in a barrel, man! / Maybe I should try recording my songs again ...

Clive Adamson ... er, poacher to gamekeeper to poacher?!

Oh, I don't know, dear reader(s). I can't keep up! Clive Adamson was at the FCA, yeah? 'A gamekeeper, Mikey?' Something like that, Voice. He was the director of supervision. ['Oh. What did he supervise?' How do I know?] And ... NOW(!!!), uh, he's got two new jobs. One at JPMorgan, and one at Prudential. [Non-executive director, twice!] 'So it gets more confusing?' Yes, and our Clive used to work at Bank of America and Citi, you know, so ... 'Four jobs?!' Well, he was a double poacher at Bank of America and Citi, and then a gamekeeper at the FCA, and now he's a double poacher again at JPMorgan and Prudential. 'Christ! Where does Clive get the energy, boss?' I couldn't tell you, man. (I have to say he doesn't look very "energetic" in his photos. However, he has a nice smile. 'Lovely smile!' That counts for a lot in my book.) Well, well ... you've got to take your hat off to him, I imagine. If you have a hat, dear reader(s). I don't wear one myself. This isn't the 1940s.

Ah, enough already with the finance! / ... / It's Monday morning, man. It's summer. The sun is ... sort of shining. YOU(!) ... shouldn't even be reading this. 'What?!' You should be in the park. 'They can read it on their mobiles in the park.' That's fine, Voice. But just get yourselves to the park!!!

Personally, I'm staying in. With my guitar. Or I might go out.

...

Anything else? 'Guitar, boss!' Music? I'm listening to a lost classic song from the Eighties: Closest Thing to Heaven by The Kane Gang.

Another lost classic(ish) song from the Eighties is Ship of Fools by World Party. / It only got to No. 42 in the charts. If Oasis had written and recorded it in the Nineties it would have been No. 1. (It's their sort of thing.)

I'm just glad I've written three potential classics, but I probably need twenty or thirty to be on the safe side because classic songs (like the ones above) can go missing, you dig?

...

Anything else? Bloody hell! You want more?! 'Crazy! They want more!' You're insatiable! I ain't got no more for you. Give me a break!

You do know it's a Monday, yeah?

Who is Benjamin Fanger?

Yes, dear reader(s), who is Benny Fanger? 'Er ...' You won't believe! This is Benny Fanger! 'Oh.' Surprised?

Unfortunately, he doesn't have much to say for himself on his LinkedIn profile. He speaks Chinese, and that is all. 'Can't he speak English, boss?' I don't think so, Voice. Just Chinese! 'How strange! Was he brought up in Chinatown in San Francisco?' Yes, he was. Actually, our Benny was an orphan ... abandoned on the streets, and a nice Chinese family took him in. 'Wow! The kindness of strangers, eh?' Yeah. They raised him as their own. And then when he grew up, he founded Shoreline Capital. 'Amazing! Someone should make a film about him.' Well, it's certainly a fascinating story, Voice.

By the way, my lovely reader(s), Shoreline Capital has just closed its third fund - the Shoreline China Value III fund - because too many investors were interested in it. 'Ha! What?!' I know! This is something I'll never understand. I mean, if people want to give you their money, what's the problem, man? Either you're a capitalist or you ain't!

Uh, never mind. Christ! I just - 'Forget it, Mikey. Come on.' No! A lot of these finance types just want to do as little as possible, you know? 'Forget it, Mike. It's Chinatown.'

...

Oh, I need a drink. Pub tomorrow!

Later(s), crocodile(s)!

[No. 324] If I were a hedge fund manager ...

You wouldn't see me for dust.

And I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[1], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[1], and I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[2], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[1], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[2], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[1], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[2], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[1], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[2], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[1], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[1], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[2], and the squares should try it ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[2], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[1], and the squares should try it ...[2], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[1], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[2], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![1], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[1], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![2], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[2], and / Friday on my mind ...[1], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[2], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![1], and / Friday on my mind ...[2], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[1], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![2], and I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[3], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[2], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[3], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[3], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[3], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[3], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[3], and the squares should try it ...[3], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[3], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[3], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[3], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[3], and / Friday on my mind ...[3], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![3], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[3], and

And I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[1], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[1], and I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[2], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[1], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[2], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[1], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[2], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[1], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[2], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[1], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[1], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[2], and the squares should try it ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[2], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[1], and the squares should try it ...[2], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[1], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[2], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![1], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[1], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![2], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[2], and / Friday on my mind ...[1], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[2], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![1], and / Friday on my mind ...[2], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[1], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![2], and I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[3], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[2], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[3], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[3], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[3], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[3], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[3], and the squares should try it ...[3], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[3], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[3], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[3], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[3], and / Friday on my mind ...[3], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![3], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[3], and

And I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[1], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[1], and I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[2], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[1], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[2], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[1], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[2], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[1], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[2], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[1], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[1], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[2], and the squares should try it ...[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[2], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[1], and the squares should try it ...[2], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[1], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[2], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![1], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[1], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![2], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[2], and / Friday on my mind ...[1], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[2], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![1], and / Friday on my mind ...[2], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[1], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![2], and I wouldn't lift a finger, except to count all the cash / oh, I'd get some "mug" to do the real work[3], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[2], and ... / ... not that there would be any work, you dig?[3], and once the money was more than enough ... / 'Mikey, how much is enough, man?'[3], and with such luxury I'd be GONE(!)[3], and phoney or genuine ... / Please, tell me, dear spinner(s), what's the difference?[3], and here ... we are, again, uh ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... the sense falls out of EVERYTHING(!)[3], and the squares should try it ...[3], and it's ANOTHER WORLD!!! / oh, not this one[3], and I'm just wondering ... would the finest wines available to humanity give me migraines?[3], and ... 'If I were a person ...' SHUT IT, Voice!!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... ah, the closest I'll get to heaven - ?[3], and I would drive a Rolls Royce BECAUSE(!) ... I've been told it's good for your voice / 'Me?!'[3], and / Friday on my mind ...[3], and hedge schmedge fund schmund ... SHOW ME THE MONEY!!![3], and is it too late to change my name to Riley?[3], and

SEC charges Nicholas Lattanzio with hedge fund fraud

They're saying he's a phoney. (Have they been reading The Catcher in the Rye - ?) Nicholas Lattanzio, from New Jersey, allegedly posed as a hedge fund manager and defrauded small companies out of more than $4 million.

He ran the Black Diamond Capital Appreciation fund, and ... According to the SEC's complaint filed in federal court in New Jersey, the fund never had more than approximately $5 million in assets as Lattanzio simply took investor money and spent it on himself and his family. He allegedly used fund assets to purchase a million-dollar home in Montclair, N.J., a $124,000 luxury car, and $100,000 worth of merchandise from Tiffany & Co. He also paid off more than $760,000 in credit card debt, withdrew approximately $570,000 in cash or checks written to himself and his girlfriend, paid more than $30,000 to a yacht broker, and funded his children's private school tuition and his membership at an exclusive golf club. More, than is healthy.

Dear oh dear. I'm trying to understand ... I mean, we would all like that lifestyle, wouldn't we? Million-dollar homes, luxury cars, yachts. 'I know I would, boss.' Shut up, Voice! You're laughing, you are, son. 'How's that?' You don't have a body to maintain. You don't have bills to pay. You have no idea what it's like in the REAL WORLD(!). You have no understanding of the pressures. 'Hang on -' You just float around the cosmos, and the astral plane, enjoying yourself. Bastard! You don't have a care in the world, man! 'Oh. Why am I working for you, then?' I don't know. Love, I suppose. No one is forcing you.

...

Anything else? Not a lot. 'Music?' Oh, I might have to buy Live Cream, Vol. 2. Cream were definitely much better live than in the studio. Don't get me wrong. They recorded some decent songs, like Sunshine of Your Love and Badge. But their live stuff is awesome. I'm not sure any other band can compare. No wonder Jimi Hendrix was a fan!

Uh ... lunch? 'Lunch!' Yes, Lunch. Er ... cheese and pickle sandwich, luxury, only the best. The usual, you know. Crisps, Yoghurt, Coke.

And, er ... 'After lunch?' No. 324. 'Yippee!'

[No. 323] Electric riffs make my world go a-ROUND

You dig?

And it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![1], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[1], and it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![2], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![1], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[2], and ... BOOM! BOOM![1], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![2], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[1], and ... BOOM! BOOM![2], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[1], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[2], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[1], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[2], and it can't stop![1], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[2], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[1], and it can't stop![2], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[1], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[2], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[1], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[2], and there is a season for everything ...[1], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[2], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[1], and there is a season for everything ...[2], and there is a season for everyone ...[1], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![1], and there is a season for everyone ...[2], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![2], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[1], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![2], and the NOISE will do it every time[1], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[2], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![1], and the NOISE will do it every time[2], and it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![3], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![2], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[3], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![3], and ... BOOM! BOOM![3], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[3], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[3], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[3], and it can't stop![3], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[3], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[3], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[3], and there is a season for everything ...[3], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[3], and there is a season for everyone ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![3], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![3], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[3], and the NOISE will do it every time[3], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![3], and

And it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![1], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[1], and it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![2], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![1], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[2], and ... BOOM! BOOM![1], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![2], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[1], and ... BOOM! BOOM![2], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[1], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[2], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[1], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[2], and it can't stop![1], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[2], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[1], and it can't stop![2], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[1], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[2], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[1], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[2], and there is a season for everything ...[1], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[2], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[1], and there is a season for everything ...[2], and there is a season for everyone ...[1], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![1], and there is a season for everyone ...[2], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![2], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[1], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![2], and the NOISE will do it every time[1], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[2], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![1], and the NOISE will do it every time[2], and it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![3], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![2], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[3], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![3], and ... BOOM! BOOM![3], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[3], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[3], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[3], and it can't stop![3], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[3], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[3], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[3], and there is a season for everything ...[3], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[3], and there is a season for everyone ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![3], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![3], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[3], and the NOISE will do it every time[3], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![3], and

And it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![1], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[1], and it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![2], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![1], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[2], and ... BOOM! BOOM![1], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![2], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[1], and ... BOOM! BOOM![2], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[1], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[2], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[1], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[2], and it can't stop![1], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[2], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[1], and it can't stop![2], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[1], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[2], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[1], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[2], and there is a season for everything ...[1], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[2], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[1], and there is a season for everything ...[2], and there is a season for everyone ...[1], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![1], and there is a season for everyone ...[2], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![2], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[1], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![2], and the NOISE will do it every time[1], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[2], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![1], and the NOISE will do it every time[2], and it could be so clean but I prefer distorted ... HOT(!) Californian all a-ROUND!!![3], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![2], and the only time I'm happy is when I'm playing my guitar[3], and here I am, waiting ... to be released, begging for the sounds to infect me![3], and ... BOOM! BOOM![3], and my fingers can skip the strings way off into outer space, man / Yes, yes, yes, I fly SO HIGH[3], and I imagine the drums in my head ... banging, banging, banging my big mind into little pieces[3], and the night? 'Ha!' Oh, the stars are like what's left of me when the music is over[3], and it can't stop![3], and it ain't over until the fat lady sings - ?! Well, well, uh, I don't know any fat ladies ...[3], and I ain't got the time for no sleepy time ...[3], and down to HI GAIN - ? Why not?! / But we're not getting clean, man, you understand me?[3], and there is a season for everything ...[3], and it's the DIRT in the ELECTRIC that makes it so exciting[3], and there is a season for everyone ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / My world is spinning and the cosmos is vibrating![3], and my fingers, oh, maybe millions of fingers, on FIRE(!) - with billions of notes!!![3], and I'm out of my body, flying ... / Can you see me, above YOU(!) / Wave to me, man[3], and the NOISE will do it every time[3], and just think of our Jimi ... all a-LONG that watchtower![3], and

Hugh Little is leaving Aberdeen Asset Management to spend more time on the golf course

Oh, it's all right for some, ain't it? I wish I could leave blogging to spend more time on the golf course. 'You don't play golf, boss.' All right, spend more time playing my guitar, then, Voice. Rockin' in the free world! / Sweet baby Jesus and the Mary Chain ... I just can't believe the luck of this guy, our Hugh. 'It's not luck, Mikey. Mr Little has been working at Aberdeen Asset Management for twenty-eight years. He was the firm's ninth employee. The man is practically a legend! And he worked hard all those years just so he can take it easy now.' Ha! Am I supposed to be impressed? You think this Hugh is a clever guy? 'Yes.' Well, why didn't he join Aviva Investors, then? 'Oh.' Yes, Voice, Oh. What do they do at Aviva Investors, son? 'Not a lot.' Ha! I'll tell you ... they go to the pub, yeah? They go to the park, they pursue their hobbies, like photography (even when they're pissed up) and - this is important - they don't wait for retirement! [They've got real brains.] They're doing it now, right now, and getting paid a bloody fortune for it. 'It's the life of Riley, boss.' Tell me about it!

Anyway, your Hugh, Voice, is/was head of acquisitions at Aberdeen. 'Great!' Yeah. [I suppose it is great.] He was the one who took over Scottish Weirdos - and loads of others. 'Welsh weirdos?' No, I don't think he's ever been interested in Welsh weirdos.

Er ... what does Aberdeen chief executive Martin Gilbert say? 'He says: I believe in myself. I know that when the going gets tough, I have the strength to keep moving on. I learnt that in the desert. Never stop! Never look back! And - never, never, never, never, never fall down and roll around in the sand, crying your little eyes out until there are no rivers of tears left to cry.' What?! That's from my archive, you idiot! What does he say about Hugh Little? 'Oh, sorry, hang on, boss ... Hugh has played a significant role in Aberdeen's growth and success. Without his management skills, commitment and focus, many of the acquisitions which have helped us to grow would not have happened and Aberdeen would not be the financially strong diversified, global asset management company we are today.' Thank you, Voice!

For fuck's sake! You can't get the staff these days, dear reader(s).

...

Anything else? 'Politics?' NO!!!! I'm brainwashing myself with Live Cream, Vol. 1. / You see, I've been waking up in the morning with the riffs going through my head, man. 'Oh dear!' No, it's a good thing. It means that when I play the guitar now I can just try to copy the shit that's in my head, you dig?

HSBC is going to cut 8,000 jobs in the UK

Well, well ... / Apparently, it's all part of the economic recovery we've heard so much about. The country is doing so well now that these jobs just aren't needed any more. 'Are you sure, boss?' I'm pretty sure, Voice. The government has told me. The media has told me. Everything is hunky dory. I'd be a fool not to believe them.

HSBC, HSBC, HSBC ... er, when was the last - 'Christ! Why are you even writing about HSBC, man? Banks aren't "sexy", are they? Come on! Get a grip! There must be a hedge fund launching somewhere.' Shut up, Voice! This is big news! I've got to write about it, man. 8,000 jobs! People's lives! You understand? Most of them are going to be frontline staff from HSBC's branches. These poor "hardworking" sods will soon discover that the Tories consider them "scroungers". 'Well ...' It's a tragedy! 'I wonder who they voted for ...' Don't start that! The blame game. They weren't to know.

Everyone thinks ... Everything is hunky dory ... until it ain't. Human nature.

...

Oh, enough with misery! We've all got our problems. 'Big time, Mikey.' The world is getting worse, Voice, not better. There is no progress. What can we do about it? Pray that the sun shines?

While my guitar ... / Yes, George Harrison knew what he was singing about. Playing a weeping guitar won't make things better, but it may help us forget the misery. Do you play, reader(s)? / Man, I played for four hours yesterday. 'Really?' I just want to play all the time now. However, I can't. Other commitments. 'Shame.' I get anxiety when I'm not playing. 'Oh.' Even holding the guitar makes me feel good though. It's comforting, you dig?

...

[Don't worry. / I want to get the dirt out. YES! I want to fly in the sky, just like Noel Gallagher. I want to touch the fucking sun! MY FINGERS!!! Oh, I want my brain to be empty. I want my soul to be fresh, so clean! I want my heart to be full of love. I want my soul to be free. / I will escape! I will...]

Laters ...

Daniel Martin and Rye Bay Capital?

Oh, you'll never guess, dear reader(s)! You'll never guess! 'Tell them, boss!' Well, my friend(s), Rye Bay Capital is a new London-based hedge fund which will be opening ... in the future. [Why not Catcher in the Rye Capital?] 'When?!' Er ... later on in the year, man - when Daniel can be bothered, I suppose. He's probably busy at the moment. 'Doing what, pray tell?' In the summer? I should imagine he's spending most of his time in the park eating ice cream, Voice. 'Oh. Ex-Aviva Investors, is he?' Maybe. Let me have a look. No! He used to be ... WELL, THIS IS STRANGE!!! THIS IS DAMN STRANGE!!! 'What, Mikey?!' A couple of "news" organizations say our Danny used to be a fund manager at Pelham Capital. 'Great!' However, his LinkedIn profile says he was merely a "senior analyst" at Pelham. 'It's a fake profile, man. Got to be.' No, I don't think so, Voice. The profile has over fifty connections. It looks genuine. 'What does this mean, then?' It means our Danny has been bigging himself up, telling anyone who will listen that he's a fund manager. 'Christ.' Yeah. But either he forgot about his LinkedIn profile or he just presumed no one in the media would do their research. 'Ha! He didn't count on you, boss. You and your utter professionalism. You're not one of these wankers who do it for a pay check. It's a passion with you, man.' Of course it is!

Hang on a minute! 'What?' Bloomberg have actually linked to his LinkedIn thing, yeah? 'So?' So, it's Bloomberg's fault! The morons can't read! 'Idiots!' It says quite clearly he was a senior analyst at Pelham, not a fund manager.

...

Obviously, reader(s), this is a Monday morning in summer. Glorious summer! None of the Daniel Martin/Catcher in the Rye stuff matters. / I think we better move on ...

Music? Ah, I'm listening to Live Cream, Vol. 1. Brilliant guitar playing by Eric Clapton! I think he peaked while in Cream. / Yesterday, I was reading a recent interview of his (online) where he said he practices once a day or every two days. In the Sixties, he would have been playing around the clock.

My guitar? I'm still doing roughly two and a half hours a day. The last sixteen months now. I'd like to do more. Gotta build those neural pathways, man!

Austerity cuts?

Oh, what's the point? George Osborne is going to cut £4.5 billion from various government departments to bring the national debt down. Why?! 'That's great, Mikey! Only another £1.5 trillion to cut!' Yes, Voice. At least!

Your George (I never voted for him) is just going to make everyone (but the very richest) miserable for no good reason BECAUSE(!) ... £4.5 billion ain't nothing, man! It won't even be noticed. In fact, we'll probably give another £100 billion or so to any bank that asks for it. 'They always want our money, the banks.' Yeah.

The national debt will be £2 trillion in no time. You wait and see. The only positive thing I can tell you and EVERYONE(!), dear reader(s), is ... we're all going to die one day. 'Oh.' I'm sorry. 'Not really too positive, is it, boss?' It's the best I can do, son.

...

A couple of hours from now, my friend(s), it will be night. Do me a favour, please. Look at the night sky, all the stars, the vast universe.

[No. 322] Nick Ring-a-ring o' roses

A-tishoo! A-tishoo!

And Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[1], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![1], and Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![1], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![2], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![2], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![1], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![2], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![1], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![2], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![1], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![2], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[1], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![2], and here ... you are, bold as brass[1], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[2], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![1], and here ... you are, bold as brass[2], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[1], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![2], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[1], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[2], and we are all looking for paradise[1], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[2], and consider the FUTURE(!)[1], and we are all looking for paradise[2], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![1], and consider the FUTURE(!)[2], and ... are we that lucky?[1], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![2], and Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[3], and ... are we that lucky?[2], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![3], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![3], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![3], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![3], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![3], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[3], and here ... you are, bold as brass[3], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![3], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[3], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[3], and we are all looking for paradise[3], and consider the FUTURE(!)[3], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![3], and ... are we that lucky?[3], and

And Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[1], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![1], and Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![1], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![2], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![2], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![1], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![2], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![1], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![2], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![1], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![2], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[1], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![2], and here ... you are, bold as brass[1], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[2], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![1], and here ... you are, bold as brass[2], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[1], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![2], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[1], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[2], and we are all looking for paradise[1], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[2], and consider the FUTURE(!)[1], and we are all looking for paradise[2], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![1], and consider the FUTURE(!)[2], and ... are we that lucky?[1], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![2], and Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[3], and ... are we that lucky?[2], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![3], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![3], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![3], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![3], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![3], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[3], and here ... you are, bold as brass[3], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![3], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[3], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[3], and we are all looking for paradise[3], and consider the FUTURE(!)[3], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![3], and ... are we that lucky?[3], and

And Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[1], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![1], and Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![1], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![2], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![2], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![1], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![2], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![1], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![2], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![1], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![2], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[1], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![2], and here ... you are, bold as brass[1], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[2], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![1], and here ... you are, bold as brass[2], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[1], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![2], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[1], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[2], and we are all looking for paradise[1], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[2], and consider the FUTURE(!)[1], and we are all looking for paradise[2], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![1], and consider the FUTURE(!)[2], and ... are we that lucky?[1], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![2], and Nick Ring a-ring, o' sweet child of mine ... all a-ROUND and DIZZY(!) now[3], and ... are we that lucky?[2], and see if your head can distribute this shit, man![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / So, let's have no more lies, please![3], and how do you feel, son? / This is how the other half live![3], and ... well, not even half, really / a long way off / only a small fraction in truth / I'm not going to put a number on it!!![3], and have YOU(!) ... got a pocket full of posies? / Fall down! Oh, fall down! Yes, fall down, man![3], and roll, for me, COME ON!!![3], and I am falling ... / (I have always been falling!) / yes, deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos[3], and here ... you are, bold as brass[3], and I have to say ... you look so pretty with those roses all a-ROUND you in mystic light - for the whole of eternity![3], and what are you looking for at Jupiter, Nick? Enlightenment? 'Ha!' Oh, don't laugh, Voice[3], and don't be embarrassed, my friend / ain't nobody got the nerve to judge you a-ROUND here[3], and we are all looking for paradise[3], and consider the FUTURE(!)[3], and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow? Er, maybe triple-cooked chips beyond the THREE![3], and ... are we that lucky?[3], and