Monday 30 November 2020

[No. 858] I ain't talking to zombies

Wake up!

And, listen![1], and, read ... with your eyes shut[1], and, listen![2], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[1], and, read ... with your eyes shut[2], and do you know?[1], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[2], and where is your soul, seriously?[1], and do you know?[2], and what are you thinking?[1], and where is your soul, seriously?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![1], and what are you thinking?[2], and, well, I am[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![2], and, so ... what are you feeling?[1], and, well, I am[2], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[1], and, so ... what are you feeling?[2], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[1], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[2], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[1], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[2], and ... yes![1], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[2], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[1], and ... yes![2], and I ain't got the time, really[1], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[2], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[1], and I ain't got the time, really[2], and it won't last ...[1], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[2], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[1], and it won't last ...[2], and does that make sense to you?[1], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[2], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[1], and does that make sense to you?[2], and, what a job![1], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[2], and I'm trying ...[1], and, what a job![2], and ... COME ON - !!![1], and I'm trying ...[2], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you dizzy? Tell me![1], and ... COME ON - !!![2], and, I mean ... I really need to know[1], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you diz zy? Tell me![2], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[1], and, I mean ... I really need to know[2], and I won't be here forever ... ?[1], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[2], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[1], and I won't be here forever ... ?[2], and never, never ... mind[1], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[2], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[1], and never, never ... mind[2], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[1], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[2], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[1], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[2], and, listen![3], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[2], and, read ... with your eyes shut[3], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[3], and do you know?[3], and where is your soul, seriously?[3], and what are you thinking?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![3], and, well, I am[3], and, so ... what are you feeling?[3], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[3], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[3], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[3], and ... yes![3], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[3], and I ain't got the time, really[3], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[3], and it won't last ...[3], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[3], and does that make sense to you?[3], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[3], and, what a job![3], and I'm trying ...[3], and ... COME ON - !!![3], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you d  i  z  z  y? Tell me![3], and, I mean ... I really need to know[3], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[3], and I won't be here forever ... ?[3], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[3], and never, never ... mind[3], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[3], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[3], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[3], and

And, listen![1], and, read ... with your eyes shut[1], and, listen![2], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[1], and, read ... with your eyes shut[2], and do you know?[1], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[2], and where is your soul, seriously?[1], and do you know?[2], and what are you thinking?[1], and where is your soul, seriously?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![1], and what are you thinking?[2], and, well, I am[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![2], and, so ... what are you feeling?[1], and, well, I am[2], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[1], and, so ... what are you feeling?[2], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[1], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[2], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[1], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[2], and ... yes![1], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[2], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[1], and ... yes![2], and I ain't got the time, really[1], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[2], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[1], and I ain't got the time, really[2], and it won't last ...[1], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[2], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[1], and it won't last ...[2], and does that make sense to you?[1], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[2], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[1], and does that make sense to you?[2], and, what a job![1], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[2], and I'm trying ...[1], and, what a job![2], and ... COME ON - !!![1], and I'm trying ...[2], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you dizzy? Tell me![1], and ... COME ON - !!![2], and, I mean ... I really need to know[1], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you diz zy? Tell me![2], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[1], and, I mean ... I really need to know[2], and I won't be here forever ... ?[1], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[2], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[1], and I won't be here forever ... ?[2], and never, never ... mind[1], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[2], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[1], and never, never ... mind[2], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[1], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[2], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[1], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[2], and, listen![3], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[2], and, read ... with your eyes shut[3], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[3], and do you know?[3], and where is your soul, seriously?[3], and what are you thinking?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![3], and, well, I am[3], and, so ... what are you feeling?[3], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[3], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[3], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[3], and ... yes![3], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[3], and I ain't got the time, really[3], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[3], and it won't last ...[3], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[3], and does that make sense to you?[3], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[3], and, what a job![3], and I'm trying ...[3], and ... COME ON - !!![3], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you d  i  z  z  y? Tell me![3], and, I mean ... I really need to know[3], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[3], and I won't be here forever ... ?[3], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[3], and never, never ... mind[3], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[3], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[3], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[3], and

And, listen![1], and, read ... with your eyes shut[1], and, listen![2], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[1], and, read ... with your eyes shut[2], and do you know?[1], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[2], and where is your soul, seriously?[1], and do you know?[2], and what are you thinking?[1], and where is your soul, seriously?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![1], and what are you thinking?[2], and, well, I am[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![2], and, so ... what are you feeling?[1], and, well, I am[2], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[1], and, so ... what are you feeling?[2], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[1], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[2], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[1], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[2], and ... yes![1], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[2], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[1], and ... yes![2], and I ain't got the time, really[1], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[2], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[1], and I ain't got the time, really[2], and it won't last ...[1], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[2], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[1], and it won't last ...[2], and does that make sense to you?[1], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[2], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[1], and does that make sense to you?[2], and, what a job![1], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[2], and I'm trying ...[1], and, what a job![2], and ... COME ON - !!![1], and I'm trying ...[2], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you dizzy? Tell me![1], and ... COME ON - !!![2], and, I mean ... I really need to know[1], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you diz zy? Tell me![2], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[1], and, I mean ... I really need to know[2], and I won't be here forever ... ?[1], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[2], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[1], and I won't be here forever ... ?[2], and never, never ... mind[1], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[2], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[1], and never, never ... mind[2], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[1], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[2], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[1], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[2], and, listen![3], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[2], and, read ... with your eyes shut[3], and there's a massive cosmos out there, my friends ... and it just wants to love you, that's all[3], and do you know?[3], and where is your soul, seriously?[3], and what are you thinking?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... oh, oh, oh ... here we are![3], and, well, I am[3], and, so ... what are you feeling?[3], and ... 'Ha, ha, ha!'[3], and I could honestly abandon them to their fates, Voice ...[3], and, Christ! ... do you know ... there are trillions of planets, trillions! ... and, uh, that's a lot[3], and ... yes![3], and there are billions of civilizations, probably ... and I haven't imagined all of them, not yet[3], and I ain't got the time, really[3], and, but, but, BUT(!) ... the point is, man ... you're wetting your pants every day ... over one little planet, one civilization[3], and it won't last ...[3], and it's going down, down, down ... or it's blowing up, up, up[3], and does that make sense to you?[3], and ... 'You're wasting your breath'[3], and, what a job![3], and I'm trying ...[3], and ... COME ON - !!![3], and I'm trying to spin some sense into you ... yes, yes, yes ... ? / ... and ... Are you d  i  z  z  y? Tell me![3], and, I mean ... I really need to know[3], and I could be a rock star now ... if I didn't care about you all so much ... just like the cosmos[3], and I won't be here forever ... ?[3], and, well ... I will, and I won't ... depends on how you look at it[3], and never, never ... mind[3], and I wish I could fly away in one of Elon's rockets ...[3], and ... 'He hasn't finished building them yet, Mikey ... the lazy sod!'[3], and I haven't recorded my demo ...[3], and

Is it 3.2 million or 2.6 million?

From a PR email -

3.2 million Gen Xers' retirement savings disrupted by The Thing and many more at risk of facing financial hardship in retirement, new report finds.

Or ...

2.6 million Gen Xers' retirement savings disrupted by The Thing and many more at risk of facing financial hardship in retirement, new report finds.

So, er ... 'I think it's nice that they've given you a choice, boss.' Shut up, idiot! I WANT THE FACTS - !!!

'Ha, ha, ha! Why do you want the facts?'

Oh, no particular reason.

Anyway ...

At least 1 in 3, or nearly 4.3 million Gen Xers, are set to reach retirement with minimal retirement incomes, new research finds.

The Thing has left 1.6 million Gen Xers on furlough, around 1.3 million with reduced hours and just over half a million made redundant.

Over half (57%) of Gen Xers who are yet to retire want to save more for retirement but are struggling to do so, with 7.9 million (61%) unable to afford to save more or prioritizing paying off debts and almost 3.8 million (29%) overwhelmed with other pressures and priorities.

New research by the International Longevity Centre UK (ILC), supported by Phoenix Group, finds that 1 in 3 Gen Xers will face a grave reality of retiring without adequate levels of pension provision, if policymakers fail to respond urgently to support this generation set to retire over the next 10-30 years.

I'm not bothered, me. I mean, if I don't make it as a rock star, well ...

The International Longevity Centre? 'Christ.' Yeah.

Listen! It's not how long you live, man, it's how deep you live, you dig?

What do you feel? What do you learn? How big does your consciousness become? How much love do you get from the cosmos?

Or am I talking to zombies?

Anyway, there's a lot of this email, but life is too short. 'Ha!' Let's go straight to the voices ...

LC Director David Sinclair argues: "From a retirement income perspective, many Gen Xers are, frankly, screwed. Too many are sleepwalking into a retirement where they won't have an adequate income to meet their aspirations."

They can always jump into the sea, son. 'Like Bodhi.' Yes, Voice. Or they can man up, like Walker.

I watched Point Blank again yesterday. I doubt that Walker had a pension or savings. That's one of the reasons* why he wanted the $93,000 so badly. 'And he was prepared to do anything to get it.' Of course he was!

*The main reason though was ... honour. That money was stolen from him. So what if he has to tear down the whole Organization to get it back?!

Anyway, David continues ...

"And their situation has been made worse by The Thing."

"They haven't been able to save enough. Many Gen Xers aren't going to benefit from final salary pensions. And there is a sense of hopelessness about how they might turn things around."

"There is some good news however. Some people really do want to save more. They just don't see how they can do it. Government and industry must find a way to lever this willingness and ensure public policy better addresses the barriers too many are facing to saving."

Christ, Dave! Even if people do save more, governments will find a way to steal it all eventually. People are losing businesses now, and jobs, and savings. The corporations will own everyone!

Anyway, who's this?

Lord Hutton, Peer and former Secretary of State for Work and Pensions, comments: "The Turner Report helped to establish a national consensus around the need to encourage greater retirement saving. This report from the ILC has highlighted the fact that many people still find it very hard to save sufficient money to cover their retirement needs."

Yeah, yeah.

"We will need a very significant focus on Generation X as we consolidate the enormous progress we gave made since 2005 in establishing an effective and inclusive pension savings policy."

Okay. Jenny?

Jenny Holt, Managing Director Customer Savings & Investments, Phoenix Group says: "This is a clear call to action to help improve the future of Gen Xers. One in five of the UK population are Gen Xers and millions will face problems because of inadequate retirement savings if actions aren't taken to help them understand their current position and the options available to them."

"This is the generation that entered the job market too late to benefit from final salary pensions, yet too early to benefit from schemes such as auto-enrolment. The combination means that without appropriate intervention many Gen Xers are expected to face very significant challenges in retirement, and even pensioner poverty."

"Policymakers, industry and business need to work together to help this generation, including ensuring they have access to the right support - whether that's guidance or advice - when they need it. With The Thing impact putting additional strain on finances this need is even more urgent."

The right support? Just give me someone like Fairfax in Point Blank to point me in the right direction. I'll do the rest, Jenny.

Okay. That's enough.

Laters.

Thursday 26 November 2020

Refinitiv: Lipper European fund flow report - October 2020

And for once!

For immediate release.

YES - !!!

I mean, I received this email at half ten, so ... 'They said immediate, boss. A few hours have passed.' Shut up, idiot!

Anyway ...

Please see attached for the October European fund flow industry report from the Lipper team at Refinitiv:

Great!

Long-term mutual funds posted net inflows for October 2020.
The overall fund flows for mutual funds in Europe in October amounted to estimated net inflows of €69.6 bn.
Equity funds (+€30.4 bn) were the best-selling individual asset type overall for October.
Equity Global (+€9.0 bn) was once again the best-selling sector among long-term funds for October.
Dedicated Follower of Fashion.
France (+€20.6 bn) was the fund domicile with the highest net inflows, followed by the U.K. (+€20.4 bn) and Ireland (+€14.4 bn).
BlackRock (+€16.0 bn) was the best-selling fund promoter in Europe for October, ahead of Aviva (+€6.2 bn) and DWS Group (+€4.6 bn).
The 10 best-selling long-term funds gathered at the share class level net inflows of €23.6 bn for October.
BlackRock ACS US Equity Tracker X1 GBP Acc (+€8.6 bn) was the best-selling individual long-term fund share class for October.
 
That's all right, ain't it? Maybe. Definitely. Oh, I don't know.

I wonder what our Detlef makes of it all ...
 
Detlef Glow, Lipper Head of EMEA Research at Refinitiv, comments: "October 2020 was another positive month for the European fund industry since the promoters of mutual funds (+€69.2 bn) enjoyed inflows. Meanwhile, the market environment turned negative as the second wave of The Thing hit major markets in Europe and investors feared a second Thing lockdown-induced economic downturn. Despite these fears, investors bought into risk assets as long-term funds enjoyed estimated net inflows of €51.9 bn while money market products had estimated inflows of €17.8 bn."

'Thanks, Detlef!'

Okay, Voice. That's my job.

Thanks, Detlef!

ENDS

...

Anything else? Music?

I worked on yesterday's tune after lunch. It's nearly finished. I just need a decent ending. 'Just stop playing, boss.' You know nothing about it.

[I'm not taking songwriting tips from him.]

It's a good four-minute rock song. It could be a hit single. I'll save it for a rainy day.

What else?

When I'm rich ... I might buy most of my clothes from Sunspel.

One of their Harrington jackets will set me back £300 or so. Ha!

You can get a Ben Sherman one for £100, and they're a top brand.

So ...

'Are you going to get one then?'

My leather jacket is all right for now.

Okay. Have a nice weekend, dear reader(s).

'Laters!'

Laters.

Mark Brennan says ...

'I'm in heaven when you smile.' 

Ha! Not exactly, Voice, no.

Mark Brennan, Director and Head of Investments at Foresight Capital Management, says, "With £100bn of government spending on infrastructure now planned through to 2022, today's Spending Review represents a definitive commitment to substantial investment across social and economic infrastructure in the UK. Crucially, the Government remains firmly committed to the role of private capital, and the establishment of a UK Infrastructure Bank in 2021 could be a transformative catalyst for crowding-in private investment."

So, uh ...

'Today's spending review, boss?' It was the other day. A PR email. What was I doing yesterday? 'Playing your guitar?' Yes.

Yes, I wrote a new tune yesterday. A good one. There are a few problems with it. Oh, nothing major.

It's just ...

'What?!'

I'm very confused at the moment, you know ... with loads of fragments of tunes and lyrics in my head. I hate the chaos!

'Oh dear.'

BUT(!) ... it's like Yeats said about the foul rag-and-bone shop of the heart. 'Is it?!' Yes, Voice. Yes, it is.

Uh ...

That spending review? Man, I don't know. We're in massive debt. Businesses and lives have been destroyed.

Why?

It's a total mess.

And, listen! I'm glad that our Elon is the second richest man in the world with his Tesla and that, but where's the bloody rocket?!

I want to get away, son. I want to head for the stars! I hate it here on earth.

Ah, never mind.

...

Okay, okay. I've made some lyrical progress, a bit ... on that other new tune ... the "great" one, like.

I've got a title for it.

The song is going to be heavier and darker than Nothing.

If Nothing is Hamlet, then Life and Death will be King Lear.

...

Listen! I'm definitely taking songwriting to new heights, kook(s). I mean, I'm not interested in matching Dylan's general lyrical standard, BUT(!) ... in a few songs, I'll have more grandeur and power. Oh, just a few! And then there's the musical element with my melodies that are getting better all the time.

Like yesterday's new melody. I'm getting good stuff now without having to wait for dreams and blackouts - which can be very unreliable, by the way.

So, I should be happy ...

It's just the chaos, man.

But ... I think of Sharpe's Waterloo. All the smoke and bullets. Do you know what I mean?

I hope so.

Ha!

...

Anything else?

Christ! Let me have my lunch, my cheese sandwich.

I'll do another post later.

Yeah, I'm on my diet. I mean, strictly. The Rock Star Diet. Lunch and dinner only. NO SNACKS - !!!

Anyway ...

Laters!

Tuesday 24 November 2020

[No. 857] Is freedom yours?

Or must it be given to you?

And, uh ...[1], and it's so confusing[1], and, uh ...[2], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[1], and it's so confusing[2], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[1], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[2], and they say ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[1], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[2], and, you, you, YOU(!)[1], and they say  ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[2], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[1], and, you, you, YOU(!)[2], and ... 'Me?!'[1], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[2], and do they know where you are?[1], and ... 'Me?!'[2], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![1], and do they know where you are?[2], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[1], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![2], and the risks you take ...[1], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[2], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![1], and the risks you take ...[2], and maybe they're watching you ...[1], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![2], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[1], and maybe they're watching you ...[2], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[1], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[2], and your consciousness ...[1], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[2], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[1], and your consciousness ...[2], and me?[1], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[2], and I'm NOTHING to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[1], and me?[2], and they can stay out of my life ...[1], and I'm NOTH ING to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[2], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[1], and they can stay out of my life ...[2], and just watch me[1], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[1], and just watch me[2], and ... ha![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[2], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![1], and ... ha![2], and that's who I am[1], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![2], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[1], and that's who I am[2], and Satan loves them[1], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[2], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![1], and Satan loves them[2], and ... come on![1], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![2], and, uh ...[3], and ... come on![2], and it's so confusing[3], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[3], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[3], and they say ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[3], and, you, you, YOU(!)[3], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[3], and ... 'Me?!'[3], and do they know where you are?[3], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![3], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[3], and the risks you take ...[3], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![3], and maybe they're watching you ...[3], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[3], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[3], and your consciousness ...[3], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[3], and me?[3], and I'm N  O  T  H  I  N  G to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[3], and they can stay out of my life ...[3], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[3], and just watch me[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[3], and ... ha![3], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![3], and that's who I am[3], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[3], and Satan loves them[3], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![3], and ... come on![3], and

And, uh ...[1], and it's so confusing[1], and, uh ...[2], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[1], and it's so confusing[2], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[1], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[2], and they say ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[1], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[2], and, you, you, YOU(!)[1], and they say  ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[2], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[1], and, you, you, YOU(!)[2], and ... 'Me?!'[1], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[2], and do they know where you are?[1], and ... 'Me?!'[2], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![1], and do they know where you are?[2], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[1], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![2], and the risks you take ...[1], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[2], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![1], and the risks you take ...[2], and maybe they're watching you ...[1], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![2], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[1], and maybe they're watching you ...[2], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[1], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[2], and your consciousness ...[1], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[2], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[1], and your consciousness ...[2], and me?[1], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[2], and I'm NOTHING to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[1], and me?[2], and they can stay out of my life ...[1], and I'm NOTH ING to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[2], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[1], and they can stay out of my life ...[2], and just watch me[1], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[1], and just watch me[2], and ... ha![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[2], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![1], and ... ha![2], and that's who I am[1], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![2], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[1], and that's who I am[2], and Satan loves them[1], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[2], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![1], and Satan loves them[2], and ... come on![1], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![2], and, uh ...[3], and ... come on![2], and it's so confusing[3], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[3], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[3], and they say ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[3], and, you, you, YOU(!)[3], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[3], and ... 'Me?!'[3], and do they know where you are?[3], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![3], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[3], and the risks you take ...[3], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![3], and maybe they're watching you ...[3], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[3], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[3], and your consciousness ...[3], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[3], and me?[3], and I'm N  O  T  H  I  N  G to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[3], and they can stay out of my life ...[3], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[3], and just watch me[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[3], and ... ha![3], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![3], and that's who I am[3], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[3], and Satan loves them[3], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![3], and ... come on![3], and

And, uh ...[1], and it's so confusing[1], and, uh ...[2], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[1], and it's so confusing[2], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[1], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[2], and they say ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[1], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[2], and, you, you, YOU(!)[1], and they say  ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[2], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[1], and, you, you, YOU(!)[2], and ... 'Me?!'[1], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[2], and do they know where you are?[1], and ... 'Me?!'[2], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![1], and do they know where you are?[2], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[1], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![2], and the risks you take ...[1], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[2], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![1], and the risks you take ...[2], and maybe they're watching you ...[1], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![2], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[1], and maybe they're watching you ...[2], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[1], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[2], and your consciousness ...[1], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[2], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[1], and your consciousness ...[2], and me?[1], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[2], and I'm NOTHING to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[1], and me?[2], and they can stay out of my life ...[1], and I'm NOTH ING to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[2], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[1], and they can stay out of my life ...[2], and just watch me[1], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[1], and just watch me[2], and ... ha![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[2], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![1], and ... ha![2], and that's who I am[1], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![2], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[1], and that's who I am[2], and Satan loves them[1], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[2], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![1], and Satan loves them[2], and ... come on![1], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![2], and, uh ...[3], and ... come on![2], and it's so confusing[3], and no one knows what anyone's rights are any more, man[3], and I feel free ... a-ROUND here, like[3], and they say ... we must keep breathing, but ... why?! / and ... what are we living for?[3], and, you, you, YOU(!)[3], and my voice reaches your soul - uh, if you have one[3], and ... 'Me?!'[3], and do they know where you are?[3], and not everything is about you, Voice ... and look how free you are![3], and, listen to me ... do they know that you're ... dizzy all a-ROUND ... at this very moment?[3], and the risks you take ...[3], and, or, or, or ... this moment? Come on![3], and maybe they're watching you ...[3], and ... 'How bored are they, exactly?'[3], and maybe you should give it a rest ... play it safe[3], and your consciousness ...[3], and do they know what you're thinking? Oh dear ... / and I hope they approve ... I really do[3], and me?[3], and I'm N  O  T  H  I  N  G to do with it ... the world you seem to love so much[3], and they can stay out of my life ...[3], and I'm spinning myself to glory! ... what else is new?[3], and just watch me[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and they would have to be massive fools to mess with me[3], and ... ha![3], and, sha, sha, sha ... man, man![3], and that's who I am[3], and I'll never change for fascists or communists or ... whatever they're calling themselves now[3], and Satan loves them[3], and, and, and ... the cosmos love me![3], and ... come on![3], and

Rethink, rebuild, recover: a new vision for a better tomorrow

Ha, ha, ha!

Listen! I can't imagine that their vision is as good as mine. I mean, I have the ultimate vision for a better tomorrow.

'What's this, boss?' Uh ... it's a PR email, Voice, obviously. From Reuters. Not obviously from Reuters though because ... there are loads of people who think they can beat me in the vision game. 'Slags!' Basically, yes.

Michael,

After the extraordinary upheavals of 2020, it's vital to look ahead at opportunities for change and growth, as well as how to deal with the rifts and problems that our world and our societies face. No country, company or community can tackle the future alone.

Okay, okay. Well, I'm only an individual, and I'm doing it alone. So ... 'That's because you're a superman, man. You're stronger than the world.' Yes.

To build a better world, thinkers and doers must come together to share ideas, collaborate and act to rethink, rebuild and recover humankind. That's why we're proud to announce the launch of REUTERS NEXT: Jan 11-14, 2021, Virtual Forum.

Hang on a minute! I ain't coming together with no slags. Sorry. I'm a man apart. Aloof. 'Up on the mountaintop, just like Zarathustra - but with the style of Steve McQueen.' Yes, Voice. Thank you.

Get your complimentary pass to attend the most essential event of 2021!

No thanks.

Register Now.

I said ... NO - !!!

REUTERS NEXT will kick off 2021 by gathering a diverse and inspiring group of world leaders and forward thinkers to examine the most critical global issues from different perspectives; leading the conversation on how we can start to rethink the future.

Yeah, yeah. Who?

Our first wave of game-changing speakers includes:

Christine Lagarde, President, European Central Bank
Mike Wirth, Chief Executive Officer, Chevron
Sandeep Mathrani, Chief Executive Officer, WeWork
Kristin Peck, Chief Executive Officer, Zoetis
Darren Walker, President, Ford Foundation
Governor Reza Baqir, State Bank Pakistan
Sebastian Thrun, Founder, President & Executive Chairman, Udacity
Shan Weijian, Chairman & Chief Executive Officer, PAG Group
Najwa Shihab, Newscaster & Anchor, Metro TV Indonesia

Ha! Do me a favour!

[By the way, dear reader(s), I had to add an "r" to the "office" ... to spell "officer", like. This is an email from Reuters.]

Get your complimentary pass to attend the most essential event of 2021!

This is getting old. No!

Join the conversation at REUTERS NEXT as we look ahead, together.

No.

Thanks,

The Reuters Next Team
Reuters Events

Whatever. Thanks for the email, anyway.

...

Anything else? Well ...

Is it Christmas yet? 'No.'

I mean, I know it's not Christmas yet, but I'm in the mood for it. Do you know what I mean, kook(s)?

I need a week off.

I need ... mince pies. But not too many. I'm on a diet.

I need Black Magic chocolates.

Never mind.

Laters.

Monday 23 November 2020

[No. 856] My new uniform ... as the coolest guy on the planet

I mean, Steve McQueen is dead.

And, so ...[1], and, well, well ...[1], and, so ...[2], and, yes ... see me now[1], and, well, well ...[2], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[1], and, yes ... see me now[2], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[1], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[2], and try living in hope ...[1], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[2], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[1], and try living in hope ...[2], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[1], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[2], and I'm so tough, yes[1], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[2], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[1], and I'm so tough, yes[2], and a size too small - on purpose[1], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[2], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[1], and a size too small - on purpose[2], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[1], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[2], and, come on, kook(s)![1], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[2], and ... Are you cool?[1], and, come on, kook(s)![2], and, Christ ...[1], and ... Are you co ol?[2], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![1], and, Christ ...[2], and ... 'Merlot?'[1], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![2], and, yes, yes[1], and ... 'Merlot?'[2], and they didn't have pine in my size[1], and, yes, yes[2], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[1], and they didn't have pine in my size[2], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[1], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[2], and, ha, ha, ha![1], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[2], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[1], and, ha, ha, ha![2], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[1], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[2], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![1], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[2], and ... 'Wow!'[1], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![2], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today ... is cooler?[1], and ... 'Wow!'[2], and ... 'No one, boss!'[1], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today ... is coo ler?[2], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![1], and ... 'No one, boss!'[2], and a-ROUND here ...[1], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![2], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[1], and a-ROUND here ...[2], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[1], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[2], and ... so dizzy![1], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[2], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[1], and ... so dizzy![2], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![1], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[2], and ... yes![1], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![2], and, so ...[3], and ... yes![2], and, well, well ...[3], and, yes ... see me now[3], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[3], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[3], and try living in hope ...[3], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[3], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[3], and I'm so tough, yes[3], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[3], and a size too small - on purpose[3], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[3], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[3], and, come on, kook(s)![3], and ... Are you c  o  o  l?[3], and, Christ ...[3], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![3], and ... 'Merlot?'[3], and, yes, yes[3], and they didn't have pine in my size[3], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[3], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[3], and, ha, ha, ha![3], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[3], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[3], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![3], and ... 'Wow!'[3], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today is ... c  o  o  l  e  r?[3], and ... 'No one, boss!'[3], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![3], and a-ROUND here ...[3], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[3], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[3], and ... so dizzy![3], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[3], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![3], and ... yes![3], and

And, so ...[1], and, well, well ...[1], and, so ...[2], and, yes ... see me now[1], and, well, well ...[2], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[1], and, yes ... see me now[2], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[1], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[2], and try living in hope ...[1], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[2], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[1], and try living in hope ...[2], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[1], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[2], and I'm so tough, yes[1], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[2], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[1], and I'm so tough, yes[2], and a size too small - on purpose[1], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[2], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[1], and a size too small - on purpose[2], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[1], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[2], and, come on, kook(s)![1], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[2], and ... Are you cool?[1], and, come on, kook(s)![2], and, Christ ...[1], and ... Are you co ol?[2], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![1], and, Christ ...[2], and ... 'Merlot?'[1], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![2], and, yes, yes[1], and ... 'Merlot?'[2], and they didn't have pine in my size[1], and, yes, yes[2], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[1], and they didn't have pine in my size[2], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[1], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[2], and, ha, ha, ha![1], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[2], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[1], and, ha, ha, ha![2], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[1], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[2], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![1], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[2], and ... 'Wow!'[1], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![2], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today ... is cooler?[1], and ... 'Wow!'[2], and ... 'No one, boss!'[1], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today ... is coo ler?[2], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![1], and ... 'No one, boss!'[2], and a-ROUND here ...[1], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![2], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[1], and a-ROUND here ...[2], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[1], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[2], and ... so dizzy![1], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[2], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[1], and ... so dizzy![2], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![1], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[2], and ... yes![1], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![2], and, so ...[3], and ... yes![2], and, well, well ...[3], and, yes ... see me now[3], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[3], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[3], and try living in hope ...[3], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[3], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[3], and I'm so tough, yes[3], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[3], and a size too small - on purpose[3], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[3], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[3], and, come on, kook(s)![3], and ... Are you c  o  o  l?[3], and, Christ ...[3], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![3], and ... 'Merlot?'[3], and, yes, yes[3], and they didn't have pine in my size[3], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[3], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[3], and, ha, ha, ha![3], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[3], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[3], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![3], and ... 'Wow!'[3], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today is ... c  o  o  l  e  r?[3], and ... 'No one, boss!'[3], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![3], and a-ROUND here ...[3], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[3], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[3], and ... so dizzy![3], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[3], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![3], and ... yes![3], and

And, so ...[1], and, well, well ...[1], and, so ...[2], and, yes ... see me now[1], and, well, well ...[2], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[1], and, yes ... see me now[2], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[1], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[2], and try living in hope ...[1], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[2], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[1], and try living in hope ...[2], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[1], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[2], and I'm so tough, yes[1], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[2], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[1], and I'm so tough, yes[2], and a size too small - on purpose[1], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[2], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[1], and a size too small - on purpose[2], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[1], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[2], and, come on, kook(s)![1], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[2], and ... Are you cool?[1], and, come on, kook(s)![2], and, Christ ...[1], and ... Are you co ol?[2], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![1], and, Christ ...[2], and ... 'Merlot?'[1], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![2], and, yes, yes[1], and ... 'Merlot?'[2], and they didn't have pine in my size[1], and, yes, yes[2], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[1], and they didn't have pine in my size[2], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[1], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[2], and, ha, ha, ha![1], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[2], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[1], and, ha, ha, ha![2], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[1], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[2], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![1], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[2], and ... 'Wow!'[1], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![2], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today ... is cooler?[1], and ... 'Wow!'[2], and ... 'No one, boss!'[1], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today ... is coo ler?[2], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![1], and ... 'No one, boss!'[2], and a-ROUND here ...[1], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![2], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[1], and a-ROUND here ...[2], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[1], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[2], and ... so dizzy![1], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[2], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[1], and ... so dizzy![2], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![1], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[2], and ... yes![1], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![2], and, so ...[3], and ... yes![2], and, well, well ...[3], and, yes ... see me now[3], and, guys ... YOU(!) can be like me[3], and, oh ... yeah, yeah ... it's unlikely, but ... you can give it your best shot, can't you?[3], and try living in hope ...[3], and we're talking ... suede Timberland boots ... like the rappers wear[3], and, uh ... I'm not a rapper, no[3], and I'm so tough, yes[3], and we're talking ... Levi's chinos ... because people say they're smarter than jeans[3], and a size too small - on purpose[3], and, yeah ... I'm pretty smart ... in more ways than one[3], and what polo shirts did Steve McQueen wear? / and here's a clue: James Bond wears them too[3], and, come on, kook(s)![3], and ... Are you c  o  o  l?[3], and, Christ ...[3], and we're talking  ... Sunspel polo shirts ... blue slate ... and ... and ... and ... merlot![3], and ... 'Merlot?'[3], and, yes, yes[3], and they didn't have pine in my size[3], and jacket? ... oh, a jacket for a badass, obviously[3], and we're talking ... and what are we, uh ... talking? ... 'Leather jacket, Mikey! Mad Mikey!'[3], and, ha, ha, ha![3], and I'm wondering now ... is there something missing?[3], and ... 'Don't tease them!'[3], and, listen! ... we're talking ... sunglasses ... Persol sunglasses ... 714s - !!![3], and ... 'Wow!'[3], and who ... tell me! ... Who in the world today is ... c  o  o  l  e  r?[3], and ... 'No one, boss!'[3], and, thank you, Voice ... thank you![3], and a-ROUND here ...[3], and I'm spinning with my new image ...[3], and a-ROUND here ... I can fix it in my head, my soul ... just like with the hypnosis[3], and ... so dizzy![3], and ... 'You're in a trance!'[3], and, ha! ... we're all in a trance, son ... all the kooks together![3], and ... yes![3], and

Black Friday

Yeah, whatever. American nonsense.

Hi Michael,

I hope you're well?

Why the question mark? I'm perfectly fine. 'FFS! Who is that, boss?' Ysabelle. 'Oh, okay.'

With Black Friday fast approaching, Currys PC World has released their Insiders Guide to Black Friday, which is packed with tips for bagging the best bargains, which include: 

Now, hold on! Ha, ha, ha! 'Ha, ha, ha!' Yes, Voice, and Ysabelle. I've already bagged the best bargains. 'Tell us!'

Two Sunspel polo shirts. Normally £90 each. I'm getting them for £63 each. 'Brilliant!'

Levi's chinos. Normally £70. I'm getting them for £50. 'Brilliant!'

Yes.

'What else are you getting, boss?'

That's it. I'm not made of money.

Anyway ...

They've released their top deals of 2019, which hints at what deals to expect for this year: 

Apple Airpods and JVC TVs were in the most demand on Black Friday 2019.
Last year the busiest time on the Currys PC World website was 9-10am. Shop before then to catch your favourite items while stock lasts.
Black Friday 2019 saw prices being slashed by as much as £300 on select items at Currys PC World, with TVs and laptops seeing some of the most competitive price cuts.

Would you be interested in featuring this guide? I've attached the press release below, but do let me know if you have any questions.

Oh, I don't have any questions, Ysabelle, but thank you for the email.

Okay, okay. Let's hear from Andy. 'Wait a minute! Who's he?' He's a voice, Voice, from Currys PC World. He's not doing you out of a job.

Come on, Andy!

Andy Barratt*, Head of Online Marketing at Currys PC World says: "Given the climate this year, Black Friday is going to be an online focussed event. This isn't to say that shoppers won't get the true 'Black Friday experience' though - in fact this is far from the case! Not only will it be a far more relaxed experience, being able to take part from home, but customers will have access to even more deals and more stock by shopping via our website. What's more, it's much quicker and easier to find what you're looking for. Plus, with our ShopLive feature, you can video call our in-store experts from home to seek advice and ask any questions you may have about our products. Once you've found what you want, you can order for home delivery or use our order and collect service at a time that suits you."

Okay, okay. Thanks, Andy. But ... you don't sell clothes, do you?

'Ha!'

Never mind.

...

Anything else? Music?

Well, I'm working on the lyrical concept for Did You See? I roughly know what the song is about now. However, I will be changing that title.

I'm excited, man! I reckon I'm writing the greatest song ever. I mean, it will be better than Nothing. The lyric will have to be just as poetic though.

And, uh ... I have another good tune from a while ago that needs a lyric. That will be a seventh song for my BIG TEN.

I would like to leave And Rain Came Down, Good Times, and We'll Show Them Heaven off the list ...

So, I need three more top tunes.

Hopefully, I'll get them soon. I'm all fired up, actually. Oh, I'll get them!

And the album? Well, that could change with new songs. I mean, it's getting stronger all the time.

It will end up being ...

BEYOND BELIEF - !!!

And that will be fine by me.

Later(s), alligator(s)!


*I googled his name, and that's the correct spelling - according to LinkedIn. The PR email spelt it "Barret", and now everyone else - accept me - is spelling it that way. C'est la vie.

Thursday 19 November 2020

Obviously, I've got various financial PR emails ...

But it's the last post of the week, dear reader(s), and I want to write about music and fashion - if you don't mind.

Right. I made a rough recording of my new tune yesterday, with a dummy lyric. I have no idea how I wrote this thing, BUT(!) ... it's the best piece of music in popular music. Only Mozart, Beethoven, and Chopin have been able to write anything like it. I mean, not even other classical guys, you dig? 'What about Wagner, boss?' Oh, maybe. I don't know.

[It's your day off, Voice. Go away! 'Bye!']

Anyway ... the working title is Did You See? Taken from the dummy lyric, and I'll probably keep it.

I'm confident now that I can become the greatest ever songwriter with only ten songs ...

Did You See?
Nothing
This World Don't Mean a Thing
Malibu
Stella
What's This Life We Live?

Plus four more. [Cosmos help me!]

Uh.

Listen! I got no time to write hundreds of songs, man. Nobody's got no time. And it's a mug's game anyway.

I ain't no mug.

And it's a long process getting these songs. Remember I Love You ... ? I scrapped it. I resurrected it as The Sun Is Getting Higher. That became The Light Is Getting Brighter. Then I scrapped it again because too many elements of the song turned up in Did You See?

So, uh ... I suppose I do have some idea how I wrote it. You need many different bursts of inspiration.

Micro-inspirations on the Straight Line!

And looping!

[Thanks, Jordan!]

...

Okay, okay. Fashion?

Man, I love my sunglasses! They're a bit loose, but I know how to fix that. I've ordered some bits of plastic that you fit on to the earpieces. And if that doesn't work, I can take them to an optician to get them heated up and bent into shape. No problem!

Sunspel polo shirts? I'll order one or two this weekend. I want to wear a blue slate one with my Persol 714s and then take a picture of myself for my Twitter profile. Er ... not yet. Early next year, when my demo is ready.

That's about it then.

Have a nice weekend, kook(s)!

Laters!