Vulog gets its hands on $20 million!

If a company can have hands, of course. 'It can't.' Pardon, Voice? 'A company can't have hands, boss. I'm pretty sure.' Shut up, you clown. I'm not in the mood. / Right -

PARIS, France - August 29, 2017 - Vulog, the shared mobility technology provider powering some of the world's most successful services across four continents, has raised $20 million in Series B funding with the participation of Frog Capital (UK), Inven Capital (Czech Republic), as well as historic investors Bpifrance (France) and ETF Partners (UK). These funds will be used to strengthen the company's leadership in the mobility space, both to grow its sales and marketing teams and further the development of its technology.

Christ! It's all technology again, ain't it? 'Without technology, man, you wouldn't be able to write this blog. Or put your songs on YouTube. Do you want to go back to the old days of sending cassettes in the fucking post?' I haven't put my songs on YouTube yet. And it's got nothing to do with you anyway. I'm just saying that technology is taking over the world now, but where is the soul? 'The soul?!' Yes, the soul. 'Ha!' What? I don't understand you, Voice. I mean, you're just a disembodied voice. A pure spirit from the astral plane, and - 'Not so pure, son. I've been around, you know?' Ha! Yeah, and I've been a-ROUND. Forget about it! Let's do this bloody PR email before I lose all my enthusiasm ...

Vulog offers a comprehensive and customizable SaaS solution that enables mobility operators - such as car rental companies, car manufacturers or any other corporation, whether a startup or global group - to launch and operate shared mobility services, including free-floating, corporate, one-way station-based and round-trip carsharing, with various ride-hailing integrations. The solution connects OEM embedded hardware or Vulog's robust in-car technology with a powerful mobility platform, expert back-end management for the operation of a service, and advanced data analytics tools. Clients have the freedom to personalize Vulog's product to suit their needs, even by combining various mobility offerings together within a single service. Vulog's technology currently powers over 10 million trips per year.

Well, well ... / I don't even know what they're talking about. 'Sharing cars.' Jesus H. - !!! Well, can't people just share?! Oh, hello, Pete, would you like a lift to work in the morning? What the hell is wrong with that?! I tell you, dear reader(s), the whole world has gone insane! / Okay, okay. There's a lot of this. I'll finish with a quote from Greg -

"We can offer our clients insights that no one else can, thanks to the experience accumulated by powering dozens of services for a number of years, including many electric vehicle (EV) services," explains CEO Greg Duconge. "The combination of our world-class software solution, our unique expertise, our optional hardware designed to enhance the mobility experience and our cutting edge analytics module makes Vulog a one-of-a-kind partner for any operator in this fast-changing market."

Yeah, thanks, Greg. Whatever. I wish you all the best though. 'It would be churlish not to.' Yes.

...

Anything else? Politics? I don't discuss politics. However, Theresa May says she wants to lead the Conservatives into the next election. She doesn't get it, does she? 'Ha! Things will go really well for her, boss, when there's no food on supermarket shelves.' I know, man. Utterly without a clue!

So, uh ... well, that's it, really. For this week, like. Have a nice weekend, crocodile(s)! Later(s)!

[No. 541] Spinning in the chilly rain

Summer is dead.

And I don't care, with the sun inside[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[1], and I don't care, with the sun inside[2], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[2], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[1], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[2], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![1], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[2], and time to be serious[1], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![2], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![1], and time to be serious[2], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[1], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![2], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[1], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[2], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![1], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[1], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![2], and ... Jesus H. - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[2], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![1], and ... Jesus H. - !!![2], and I'm on the floor, knackered[1], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![2], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[1], and I'm on the floor, knackered[2], and we don't care, eh?[1], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[2], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[1], and we don't care, eh?[2], and come on, you, come on![1], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[2], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[1], and come on, you, come on![2], and why do I even try to explain?[1], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[2], and I don't care, with the sun inside[3], and why do I even try to explain?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[3], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[3], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[3], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![3], and time to be serious[3], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![3], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[3], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[3], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[3], and ... Jesus H. - !!![3], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![3], and I'm on the floor, knackered[3], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[3], and we don't care, eh?[3], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[3], and come on, you, come on![3], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[3], and why do I even try to explain?[3], and

And I don't care, with the sun inside[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[1], and I don't care, with the sun inside[2], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[2], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[1], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[2], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![1], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[2], and time to be serious[1], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![2], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![1], and time to be serious[2], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[1], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![2], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[1], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[2], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![1], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[1], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![2], and ... Jesus H. - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[2], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![1], and ... Jesus H. - !!![2], and I'm on the floor, knackered[1], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![2], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[1], and I'm on the floor, knackered[2], and we don't care, eh?[1], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[2], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[1], and we don't care, eh?[2], and come on, you, come on![1], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[2], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[1], and come on, you, come on![2], and why do I even try to explain?[1], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[2], and I don't care, with the sun inside[3], and why do I even try to explain?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[3], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[3], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[3], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![3], and time to be serious[3], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![3], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[3], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[3], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[3], and ... Jesus H. - !!![3], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![3], and I'm on the floor, knackered[3], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[3], and we don't care, eh?[3], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[3], and come on, you, come on![3], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[3], and why do I even try to explain?[3], and

And I don't care, with the sun inside[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[1], and I don't care, with the sun inside[2], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[2], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[1], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[2], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![1], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[2], and time to be serious[1], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![2], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![1], and time to be serious[2], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[1], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![2], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[1], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[2], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![1], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[1], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![2], and ... Jesus H. - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[2], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![1], and ... Jesus H. - !!![2], and I'm on the floor, knackered[1], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![2], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[1], and I'm on the floor, knackered[2], and we don't care, eh?[1], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[2], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[1], and we don't care, eh?[2], and come on, you, come on![1], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[2], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[1], and come on, you, come on![2], and why do I even try to explain?[1], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[2], and I don't care, with the sun inside[3], and why do I even try to explain?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... produces enough heat in my mind[3], and time for Dennis Wilson, I'm sure[3], and soon, out, I'll be wearing the black leather jacket again, ha! / and it suits me just fine, you dig?[3], and rock on the floor, baby, and roll a-ROUND, please![3], and time to be serious[3], and I've had my fun in St Ives ... but winter is coming, my kook(s), and we must work![3], and, uh ... what are YOU(!) doing?[3], and this is only a part of my life, son/daughter ... / ... and maybe in the real world I'll be a true monster[3], and ... uh, uh, uh, you, spin![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND so now ... it's conceptual, blog, literature, online, 2017, understand?[3], and ... Jesus H. - !!![3], and you, you, you ... can lead a horse to water ... / ... and - 'If wishes were horses, Mikey!' / ... and shut up, cretin![3], and I'm on the floor, knackered[3], and the rain is here, and the rain is here, and the rain is here / and it's not just out there ...[3], and we don't care, eh?[3], and while the slags of the COLD WORLD are standing still ... I'm on the move, making moves, yes[3], and come on, you, come on![3], and I won't suffer any weakness / and I refuse to have YOU(!) suffer any weakness[3], and why do I even try to explain?[3], and

WhopperCoin or Mikeycoin ... ?

Well, well ... well! / It's your choice, man. I mean, dear reader(s). Uh. I don't care, like. 'You mean Bitcoin, boss.' No, I mean WhopperCoin. Or Mikeycoin. 'What the hell is WhopperCoin?! We all know what Mikeycoin is, but what the hell is WhopperCoin, man?!' Ha! What's WhopperCoin, he says. Christ! It's Burger King's new cryptocurrency, Voice. 'You're kidding!' No.

It's in Russia, but it will probably spread. You see, every time you buy a Whopper, they give you a WhopperCoin which you can save up and trade for another Whopper burger later. Unfortunately, I'm a vegetarian. 'They do a good veggie bean burger thing, Mikey.' I know they do, Voice, but I'm not sure it's part of the WhopperCoin deal. Maybe they'll expand it. Who knows?!

Okay, okay. The point is, all firms will be coming out with their own cryptocurrencies now. The question is, will they be able to compete with Mikeycoin? 'Ha!' What? 'Your Mikeycoin is a load of shit, boss.' Excuse me! It's in the development stages. 'Yeah, right. A little cardboard cut-out of a coin which you think is going to be worth something. You email it to people, and they're supposed to print it out. Seriously? Pathetic!' Shut up, you fucking idiot! That was from ages ago, before I even understood what cryptocurrencies were.

Ignore him, reader(s). He understands ... NOTHING. The only thing that can stop Mikeycoin is the music I'm doing. There just aren't enough hours in the day, you dig?

...

Anything else? Brexit? FFS! Do me a favour! I'm not discussing that nonsense any more. However, I'll just say this: the joke's over. It's time to forget all about it. Everyone sensible now realizes that Brexit will destroy the UK economically and maybe even geographically. It was quite amusing for a while, but ... the joke is over now. Let's move on. Please!

Music? My music? Oh, I've got another new tune in the works. It's nearly finished. 'Great!' It means I'll be able to drop the weakest tune from the eleven I need for an album. 'Yippee!' Yeah, thanks, man. For your support, ha!

What else? Nothing. Laters, blog and pop fan(s)!

Just like Brian Wilson's sandbox ... ?!

Ha! I think that's what they're talking about. 'What's this, boss?' PR email, son, about Bahrain welcoming two entrants into a sandbox. 'Regulatory sandbox, you mean?' I don't know about that, Voice. I think they're talking about the sort of sandbox that Brian Wilson had. 'Eh?' You know, Brian Wilson from The Beach Boys? 'Yeah, of course.' Well, when he was composing his tunes he used to like to sit in a sandbox with his piano. 'Why?!' I don't know! Ask him. Maybe it gave him that beach vibe that he was looking for. 'Well, why didn't he go to the beach?' Oh, what, with his piano, you're saying? 'Ha!' Forget about it. / Here we are -

Manama, 28th August 2017:  The Central Bank of Bahrain (CBB) has announced two entrants into its regulatory sandbox. Tramonex, a London-based forex cash management solution for businesses; and NOW Money, the Dubai-based account and remittance service for low-income workers in the GCC.

Well, okay, it's, uh ... just a boring regulatory sandbox. 'Told you.' Never mind.

Launched in June, the Bahrain regulatory sandbox provides a virtual space for companies to test their financial technology based solutions, and is open to existing CBB licensees and other local and foreign firms. By offering firms an opportunity for expansion and innovation, the framework is expected to help boost fintech businesses around the globe and consolidate Bahrain's position as a fintech and financial services hub.

Now ... Tramonex?

For companies dealing in multiple currencies, Tramonex offers an efficient, quick and cheaper way of processing and transferring funds at your fingertips. The start-up focuses on facilitating conversion and settlement services to automate cross border transactions, and provides competitive services.

Okay, okay. That's nice. 'What about NOW Money, boss?' We know all about them. I've written about them a couple of times, ain't I?

Okay, okay. As it's not an exciting music-related story, I think we can end it here with a quote from Khalid Hamad ...

Khalid Hamad, Executive Director of Banking Supervision at CBB, said: "We are pleased to welcome the first two entrants into the regulatory sandbox, in the early stages of the framework's launch. This initiative highlights the CBB's continuous efforts as the Kingdom's single regulator to update and develop the fintech ecosystem and enable industry players to create innovative and forward-looking fintech products while maintaining the overall safety and soundness of the financial system."

Thanks, Khalid.

-ENDS-

...

Anything else? [Because their ENDS isn't my end, you dig?] Music? What am I listening to? Bob Marley.

Oh, by the way, Gram Parsons? I'm not crazy about most of his songs, except for two - She and $1000 Wedding. They are great songs, and his vocals are lovely on the recordings. Check them out on YouTube, dear reader(s), if you're not familiar. 'His friends cremated him in the desert, didn't they, boss?' Well, yes ... after he died. They stole Parsons' body. Unfortunately, they messed it up. Just poured petrol over him in this car, and threw in a match. 'Christ!' Ridiculous.

[No. 540] Could you be loved?

Well ...

And well, well, uh ...[1], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[1], and well, well, uh ...[2], and I treat you right, don't I?[1], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[2], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![1], and I treat you right, don't I?[2], and positive is the way, yes[1], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![2], and ... feel - !!![1], and positive is the way, yes[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[1], and ... feel - !!![2], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[2], and ... spin - !!![1], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![2], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[1], and ... spin - !!![2], and no woman no cry, obviously[1], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[2], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[1], and no woman no cry, obviously[2], and they want to hurt you[1], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[2], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[1], and they want to hurt you[2], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![1], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[2], and their world means NOTHING here[1], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![2], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[1], and their world means NOTHING here[2], and I control all this, you understand?[1], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[2], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![1], and I control all this, you understand?[2], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[1], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![2], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![1], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[2], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[1], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![2], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[1], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[2], and with you being so enlightened, like[1], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[2], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[1], and with you being so enlightened, like[2], and well, well, uh ...[3], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[2], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[3], and I treat you right, don't I?[3], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![3], and positive is the way, yes[3], and ... feel - !!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[3], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![3], and ... spin - !!![3], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[3], and no woman no cry, obviously[3], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[3], and they want to hurt you[3], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[3], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![3], and their world means NOTHING here[3], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[3], and I control all this, you understand?[3], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![3], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[3], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![3], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[3], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[3], and with you being so enlightened, like[3], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[3], and

And well, well, uh ...[1], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[1], and well, well, uh ...[2], and I treat you right, don't I?[1], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[2], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![1], and I treat you right, don't I?[2], and positive is the way, yes[1], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![2], and ... feel - !!![1], and positive is the way, yes[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[1], and ... feel - !!![2], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[2], and ... spin - !!![1], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![2], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[1], and ... spin - !!![2], and no woman no cry, obviously[1], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[2], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[1], and no woman no cry, obviously[2], and they want to hurt you[1], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[2], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[1], and they want to hurt you[2], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![1], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[2], and their world means NOTHING here[1], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![2], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[1], and their world means NOTHING here[2], and I control all this, you understand?[1], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[2], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![1], and I control all this, you understand?[2], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[1], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![2], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![1], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[2], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[1], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![2], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[1], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[2], and with you being so enlightened, like[1], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[2], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[1], and with you being so enlightened, like[2], and well, well, uh ...[3], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[2], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[3], and I treat you right, don't I?[3], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![3], and positive is the way, yes[3], and ... feel - !!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[3], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![3], and ... spin - !!![3], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[3], and no woman no cry, obviously[3], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[3], and they want to hurt you[3], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[3], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![3], and their world means NOTHING here[3], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[3], and I control all this, you understand?[3], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![3], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[3], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![3], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[3], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[3], and with you being so enlightened, like[3], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[3], and

And well, well, uh ...[1], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[1], and well, well, uh ...[2], and I treat you right, don't I?[1], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[2], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![1], and I treat you right, don't I?[2], and positive is the way, yes[1], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![2], and ... feel - !!![1], and positive is the way, yes[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[1], and ... feel - !!![2], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[2], and ... spin - !!![1], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![2], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[1], and ... spin - !!![2], and no woman no cry, obviously[1], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[2], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[1], and no woman no cry, obviously[2], and they want to hurt you[1], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[2], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[1], and they want to hurt you[2], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![1], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[2], and their world means NOTHING here[1], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![2], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[1], and their world means NOTHING here[2], and I control all this, you understand?[1], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[2], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![1], and I control all this, you understand?[2], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[1], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![2], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![1], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[2], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[1], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![2], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[1], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[2], and with you being so enlightened, like[1], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[2], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[1], and with you being so enlightened, like[2], and well, well, uh ...[3], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[2], and when the COLD WORLD is getting you down with its evil words and thoughts ...[3], and I treat you right, don't I?[3], and a-ROUND here ... everyone is loved / Except those goddamn awful squares, of course, ha![3], and positive is the way, yes[3], and ... feel - !!![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... now, how's your consciousness ness nesses?[3], and ... please tell me, YES - !!![3], and ... spin - !!![3], and, kook(s) ... you've got to come to me with the proper attitude / and are you ever so DIZZY(!)?[3], and no woman no cry, obviously[3], and those squares will try their best to fool you / and they live in the darkness, not the light[3], and they want to hurt you[3], and I will change you, and rearrange you ... free of charge with my personal guarantee[3], and, oh ... stick with me, my friend(s), and you will travel faster than the speed of light![3], and their world means NOTHING here[3], and the DIZZY(!) life is so beautiful ... / and I hope you know where you're coming from[3], and I control all this, you understand?[3], and my message to YOU(!) is ... don't worry about a thing / and, look, the sun is shining![3], and the sun Picasso spoke of ...[3], and inside of us, you dig? / and it's utterly COSMIC - !!![3], and let the losers chase after rainbows / and we know what we've got and what it's worth[3], and squares, monsters, phoneys, etc. / and surely I don't need to tell ... YOU(!)[3], and with you being so enlightened, like[3], and, ha, ha, ha! / and, man, I can't help laughing / and everything's gonna be all right[3], and

I don't want to connect with anyone in finance ...

I mean ... 'Well, it's a bank holiday, boss. I don't blame you. Take a day off.' No, Voice, I mean interviews and that. 'Eh?' I mean, I get these PR emails - you know I do - saying Would you like to speak to Harry or Trisha or Bert? 'Who the hell are those guys?!' Well, I just made them up, man. But that's not the point. 'What is the point?' The point is, I enjoy being cut off in my own little fantasy world where finance can be what I want it to be. 'I can dig that, boss.' Yeah. It's why I don't go to any of those conferences or breakfast briefings.

Anyway, we've got Brent Wilsey now. I'm sure he's a great guy -

Wall Street tech boon offering hope for malls/brick-and-mortar retail. Amid reports that "tech titans are now worth $1 trillion; a glimmer of hope for malls?" as "buoyed by a dizzying rise in stock prices" - and the hope this is proffering for malls/brick-and mortars with "struggling retailers like Express, American Eagle Outfitters and Guess beating Wall Street predictions for profit and revenue in their latest quarters," I'm hoping to connect you with investment and personal finance expert Brent Wilsey for commentary and perspective. This includes insight on other reports citing that "more than 300 retailers have filed for bankruptcy so far in 2017, and by year end, store closings are projected to hit 8,640 - greater than all the reported closures from 2003 to 2006 combined, according to a report compiled by Fit Small Business".

Er ... 'What was that?!' I don't know, exactly. 'You rewrote that, didn't you?' I swear to Christ I didn't touch a word of it, Voice. Look at the email for yourself. 'Well, okay.' It's just avant-garde literature, man. Actually quite impressive.

...

Right. Anything else? Ha! Jesus H. - !!! Well, it may be a holiday for you, dear reader(s), but I'm working. I'll be doing a conceptual later, No. 540. / Oh. The funny thing, is, uh, by the way, I've been looking at an article online that talks about the new novelists who are supposed to be creating conceptual literature. But it's a joke, man. Firstly, what they're doing is just a direct steal from Duchamp, using actual pictures in their novels, or something, and readymades. I don't know. But secondly, they're still writing fucking novels! 'Ha!' I mean, in 2017!!! 'Well, why don't you contact the guy who wrote the article, Mikey, and have it out with him?' Because, my little invisible friend, I really don't give a shit. 'Oh.' I'm all about the rock and roll lifestyle these days. Obviously, in future years, when I'm rockin' in the free world, my blog will still be available for people to read if they want to, but ... 'You've moved on, man.' Exactly. In my head, like. I'm in another reality now.

So it is written, so it shall be done. Or something. You dig?

Laters.

[No. 539] If I close my eyes ...

I see things.

And, yes, so many things, good, bad[1], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[1], and, yes, so many things, good, bad[2], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[1], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[2], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![1], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[2], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[1], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![2], and don't take me to no doctor, please![1], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[1], and don't take me to no doctor, please![2], and stay, my consciousness![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[2], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[1], and stay, my consciousness![2], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[1], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[2], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[1], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[2], and of sorts, ha![1], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[2], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[1], and of sorts, ha![2], and faces, places[1], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[2], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[1], and faces, places[2], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![1], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[2], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![1], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![2], and I love all kooks[1], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![2], and I can still feel with the best of them[1], and I love all kooks[2], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[1], and I can still feel with the best of them[2], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![1], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[2], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[1], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![2], and, kook(s), pray for me![1], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[2], and, yes, so many things, good, bad[3], and, kook(s), pray for me![2], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[3], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[3], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![3], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[3], and don't take me to no doctor, please![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[3], and stay, my consciousness![3], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[3], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[3], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[3], and of sorts, ha![3], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[3], and faces, places[3], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[3], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![3], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![3], and I love all kooks[3], and I can still feel with the best of them[3], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[3], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![3], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[3], and, kook(s), pray for me![3], and

And, yes, so many things, good, bad[1], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[1], and, yes, so many things, good, bad[2], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[1], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[2], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![1], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[2], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[1], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![2], and don't take me to no doctor, please![1], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[1], and don't take me to no doctor, please![2], and stay, my consciousness![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[2], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[1], and stay, my consciousness![2], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[1], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[2], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[1], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[2], and of sorts, ha![1], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[2], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[1], and of sorts, ha![2], and faces, places[1], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[2], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[1], and faces, places[2], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![1], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[2], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![1], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![2], and I love all kooks[1], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![2], and I can still feel with the best of them[1], and I love all kooks[2], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[1], and I can still feel with the best of them[2], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![1], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[2], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[1], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![2], and, kook(s), pray for me![1], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[2], and, yes, so many things, good, bad[3], and, kook(s), pray for me![2], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[3], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[3], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![3], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[3], and don't take me to no doctor, please![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[3], and stay, my consciousness![3], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[3], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[3], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[3], and of sorts, ha![3], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[3], and faces, places[3], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[3], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![3], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![3], and I love all kooks[3], and I can still feel with the best of them[3], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[3], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![3], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[3], and, kook(s), pray for me![3], and

And, yes, so many things, good, bad[1], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[1], and, yes, so many things, good, bad[2], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[1], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[2], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![1], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[2], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[1], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![2], and don't take me to no doctor, please![1], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[1], and don't take me to no doctor, please![2], and stay, my consciousness![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[2], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[1], and stay, my consciousness![2], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[1], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[2], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[1], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[2], and of sorts, ha![1], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[2], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[1], and of sorts, ha![2], and faces, places[1], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[2], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[1], and faces, places[2], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![1], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[2], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![1], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![2], and I love all kooks[1], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![2], and I can still feel with the best of them[1], and I love all kooks[2], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[1], and I can still feel with the best of them[2], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![1], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[2], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[1], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![2], and, kook(s), pray for me![1], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[2], and, yes, so many things, good, bad[3], and, kook(s), pray for me![2], and being awake is maybe the ultimate nightmare these days, so ...[3], and, yes, it's true ... visions come to me all the time[3], and there's very little I can do to stop them / I mean, keep my eyes open 24/7? / uh, no thanks![3], and I need to sleep, man / and, baby, YOU(!) can spin me to sleep[3], and don't take me to no doctor, please![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND here ... is the only way to stay insane[3], and stay, my consciousness![3], and ... 'Sleep is the cousin of death' / Who said that? / 'Me, boss' / No, some rapper, Voice[3], and words, words, words, uh, Hamlet[3], and I don't want to lose the endless stream that will surely lead me to glory, of sorts[3], and of sorts, ha![3], and guess what ... I'm staying POSITIVE with my life because what else can you do?[3], and faces, places[3], and a-ROUND here ... can be trouble, obviously, when words decide to gang up on me ...[3], and I must fight by getting FASTER - !!![3], and it's all mush, eventually, thank God![3], and I love all kooks[3], and I can still feel with the best of them[3], and ... 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548, 549 ... sure, I've got the discipline[3], and it could be worse / and 'This is not the worst' / Exactly![3], and the cosmos has chosen me / and who am I to say that the cosmos has made a terrible mistake?[3], and, kook(s), pray for me![3], and

Andrea Casulli has got a new job at Brevan Howard Asset Management ...

Well, well ... / Or so they. 'What? Who say?' They say. 'Who, boss?!' Those people, Voice. 'What fucking people, boss?!' The people who know what's happening in finance these days. Me? I know NOTHING. I only know what they tell me. 'But that ain't nothing, man.' Ha! Matter of opinion ...

Yeah, yeah ... Andrea Casulli. He was at Goldman Sachs, you know? [He was a senior fixed income specialist - if you like that sort of detail, dear reader(s). I'm sure you do. Christ!] 'Wow, man! / Why does he want to work for Brevan Howard then?' He wants a new challenge. Or so they say.

Okay, okay. Let's take a look at Andrea's LinkedIn profile. 'He hasn't updated it!' No. He better sort it out. It's unprofessional to have a LinkedIn profile that isn't up to date. 'It's sloppy. God knows what his clients think.' Don't be too hard on him, Voice. He probably hasn't had the time. But if I know Andrea, he'll get it sorted pretty quickly now. 'Do you know Andrea?' Never heard of him. 'Oh. Close friend, then.' Yeah. Like everyone else ...

So, uh ... Managing Director - IRP Trading at Goldman, and Managing Director - Head of Linear Rates (G10 and Emerging Markets EMEA), UBS Legacy at UBS, and Executive Director, Euro Govies & Inflation Products at Lehman Brothers, and ... Analyst, Interest Rate Derivatives and Bonds at ... [drum roll] ... Goldman Sachs! 'Twice! What happens if he goes back to Goldman for a third time?' He's there for life. I mean, that's their rule.

...

And my rule is ... to have a rest from finance, after four paragraphs. I'll be doing a conceptual later, No. 539.

So ... music? What am I listening to? I had Squeeze and R.E.M. on earlier, but now I'm listening to Donovan, what I reckon are his three best songs -

Sunshine Superman
Mellow Yellow
Hurdy Gurdy Man

Three pop classics!

And an honourable mention to Atlantis. Shine box time!

Oh, by the way, when I visit St Ives, I always see the pillbox [near the golf course, Porth Kidney] that Donovan slept in one summer in the early Sixties, before he became famous. I mean, he said he slept in a pillbox, and that's the only one in the area. As far as I know, like. Oh, never mind. It's not actually important.

Laters.

NOW Money gets $700,000!

Well, that's nice. Someone has given NOW Money $700,000. I wish someone would give me $700,000. I could pack this blog in. 'Oh, don't be like that, boss. Are you depressed today?' No. I'm just saying, like. I could do with the money.

Dubai, August 22, 2017 - NOW Money has secured an investment of $700,000 from two U.S. based venture capital investors - Accion Venture Lab, the seed-stage investment initiative of financial inclusion leader Accion, and Newid Capital.

Oh, right. It's an investment, not a gift. Silly me! 'But people could invest in you, boss. This blog, maybe.' Ha!

Both Accion Venture Lab and Newid Capital make investments that target the financially underserved. Venture Lab invests capital in, and provides support to, innovative FinTech start-ups that increase access to, improve the quality of, or reduce the cost of financial services for the underserved at scale. Newid Capital focuses on such investments outside of North America and Western Europe.
 
Well, well ... well. I mean, I'm financially underserved, ain't I? Maybe some lovely money will be coming in my direction ...

NOW Money uses mobile banking technology to provide accounts, financial inclusion and a range of low-cost remittance options to low-income migrant workers in the Gulf region. It aims to provide access to affordable financial services for everyone.
 
Well, obviously, I can't compete with that. 'Never mind, boss. Maybe in another life, yeah?' Listen, Voice, I don't even care. I finished that song yesterday. It'll definitely be the fourth song on the new demo. I've got four songs now which will be untouchable in today's music scene. So I don't care about any fucking investments or gifts! 'All right, calm down, son.' Shut up! Shut up, man! Let's just finish this post. Please! Sorry, dear reader(s). / Let's hear from Dillon. 'Bob Dylan?!' Ian Dillon. 'Oh.' Yeah ...

Co-founder of NOW Money, Ian Dillon said, "Having what's understood to be the first early stage investment from U.S. venture capital into the Middle East is testament to the opportunities available here and how far the GCC has come in making itself a destination for investment. We hope this will be the first of many U.S. venture capital investments in the region, and will help to grow the ecosystem further."

Nice one.

"We're excited to be making such a big social impact in the region. Accion is one of the leading global institutions promoting financial inclusion, and Newid Capital was co-founded by Nigel Morris, who previously co-founded Capital One Financial Services. We're excited to be working with them to bring financial inclusion to the 26 million unbanked in the GCC," he added.

All right, all right. Thanks for that, Ian. 'What about Mickey Schlein and Amee Parbhoo?' Forget about them, Voice. Seriously. We don't need to hear from everyone, you dig?

Oh, look at this!!! -

*****END*****

'Brilliant!' Yeah, I love it. That's absolute class, that is.

...

Oh, oh! However, it's not the end of this post, dear reader(s). Just the PR email.

So ...

What about Brexit, eh? The planes won't even be flying now! 'Ha!' How bad does it have to get before all the nutjobs realize that they've fucked up tragically?

Uh ...

££££££ THE END $$$$$$

Is Amazon going to open a bank?

Ha! Ha! Uh ... 'Ha!' / [Well.] Well, it'll be bad news for you, dear reader(s). Probably. I mean, you can forget about your lovely lifestyle as one of the rich. You'll be working in an Amazon bank warehouse on a zero hours contract, earning minimum wage - if you're lucky. 'What is this bullshit, boss? Get a grip!' It's not bullshit, Voice. It's a PR email from ParcelHero. Look -

Could we soon be opening an Amazon bank account and getting loans and mortgages from the e-commerce giant? The e-commerce delivery expert ParcelHero says the UK finance industry can bank on it.

[Not in the mood, actually ...] You see? 'Oh.' Oh, indeed. Everyone will be a slave in the future. No one will have a decent job.

Is Amazon preparing to move into banking? Reports earlier this year that Amazon was considering buying the US bank Capital One highlight the fact that controlling how we buy goods, as well as where we buy them, would make a great deal of sense for the US giant.

And the e-commerce delivery specialist ParcelHero says Amazon could well be looking at the UK banking sector too; thanks to a change in regulation in 2013 that has allowed a host of new online 'challenger banks' to join the established High Street players.

[I won't make these bits small, I refuse ...] You see, dear reader(s)? It's curtains for you! 'What does Jinksy say, boss?' What?! Who in the name of Christ is Jinksy?! 'Our mate, David Jinks.' Oh, him ...

ParcelHero's Head of Consumer Research, David Jinks MILT, says: "Speculation continues that Amazon is interested in Capital One in the USA. It's one of the top ten American banks, worth around $334bn in assets, and has a huge credit card portfolio. While Amazon’s planned purchase of Whole Foods has got the US Government concerned about retail monopolies, an acquisition in a totally unrelated sector should not result in similar problems. Capital One has already made its services compatible with Amazon's Alexa smart speaker and the potential future opportunities are very significant."

[Chaos, this morning, my brain ...] And will they pay any tax this time? 'Ha!' That's the big question. I think - 'Okay, okay. Let Jinksy finish, Mikey.' Boss. 'Let Jinksy finish, boss.' Okay. / Okay. / Okay. 'Come on!'

And it's a move that would also work well in the UK, says David: "Local bank branches may now be harder to find on your High Street than dodos, but the UK's online banking industry is mushrooming. Well over 9,000 bank and building society branches have closed in recent years; but online around 50 new banking sector companies have been announced since the regulations were eased. However, we believe the established banks' stiffest battle will come not from a direct banking industry competitor, but from that ultimate in industry disruptors, Amazon."

[Okay, okay, okay.] I ain't looking for dodos, but never mind. What else? 'There’s more!' That's enough, Voice. I think my readers have got the general idea. 'No, no, no. Yeah, okay, skip that bit there. But this bit here -'

And David adds: "The company also already has its own UK credit card. The Amazon Platinum Mastercard gives reward points whenever you shop on it; but, behind the scenes, its UK card is actually run by NewDay, with Amazon simply acting as a credit broker. Were Amazon to create its own bank, or buy an existing provider, access to full credit card information would give it even more vital data about its customers' shopping behaviour."

[All right.] All right. A credit card. Jesus H. - ! 'Let him conclude.' Okay, okay. Okay, okay. Okay, okay. Help! I can't stop! 'Jinksy, come on, son!' Come on, Jinksy!

Concludes David: "Think of the perks an Amazon bank could use to lure more people to join the Prime Membership scheme. From more attractive rates of APR, to added points when you buy on its cards, Amazon could attract a new group of Prime members. And remember those members spend around twice as much as non-members with Amazon."

[Please!] Are we finished now? Please! 'Wait for it!' Please!

ENDS

[Thank God!] Thank God! Thank God!

[No. 538] And a-ROUND again, my friend(s)!

Even when I get to a thousand I won't stop because I'm enjoying myself too much. You dig?

And ... COME ON - !!![1], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![1], and ... COME ON - !!![2], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[1], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![2], and talk about living the dream![1], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[1], and talk about living the dream![2], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[2], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[1], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![2], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![1], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[2], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[1], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![2], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[1], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[2], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[1], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[1], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[2], and it's like a goddamn disease![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[2], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[1], and it's like a goddamn disease![2], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[1], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[2], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[1], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[2], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![1], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[2], and beautiful you ...[1], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[1], and beautiful you ...[2], and really hope, yeah?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[2], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[1], and really hope, yeah?[2], and do it, do it, do it ... again![1], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[2], and ... COME ON - !!![3], and do it, do it, do it ... again![2], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![3], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[3], and talk about living the dream![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[3], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![3], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[3], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![3], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[3], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[3], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[3], and it's like a goddamn disease![3], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[3], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[3], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[3], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![3], and beautiful you ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[3], and really hope, yeah?[3], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[3], and do it, do it, do it ... again![3], and

And ... COME ON - !!![1], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![1], and ... COME ON - !!![2], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[1], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![2], and talk about living the dream![1], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[1], and talk about living the dream![2], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[2], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[1], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![2], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![1], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[2], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[1], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![2], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[1], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[2], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[1], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[1], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[2], and it's like a goddamn disease![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[2], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[1], and it's like a goddamn disease![2], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[1], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[2], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[1], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[2], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![1], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[2], and beautiful you ...[1], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[1], and beautiful you ...[2], and really hope, yeah?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[2], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[1], and really hope, yeah?[2], and do it, do it, do it ... again![1], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[2], and ... COME ON - !!![3], and do it, do it, do it ... again![2], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![3], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[3], and talk about living the dream![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[3], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![3], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[3], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![3], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[3], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[3], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[3], and it's like a goddamn disease![3], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[3], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[3], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[3], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![3], and beautiful you ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[3], and really hope, yeah?[3], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[3], and do it, do it, do it ... again![3], and

And ... COME ON - !!![1], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![1], and ... COME ON - !!![2], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[1], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![2], and talk about living the dream![1], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[1], and talk about living the dream![2], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[2], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[1], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![2], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![1], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[2], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[1], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![2], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[1], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[2], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[1], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[1], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[2], and it's like a goddamn disease![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[2], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[1], and it's like a goddamn disease![2], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[1], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[2], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[1], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[2], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![1], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[2], and beautiful you ...[1], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[1], and beautiful you ...[2], and really hope, yeah?[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[2], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[1], and really hope, yeah?[2], and do it, do it, do it ... again![1], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[2], and ... COME ON - !!![3], and do it, do it, do it ... again![2], and it's all too much, the ecstasy in my heart![3], and YOU(!) dig, dig, dig, deeper down, if you can, and find all kinds of treasures ...[3], and talk about living the dream![3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and who wouldn't want to do this forever?[3], and a sane person, obviously, one of those awful squares, ha![3], and it's the most fun you can have with your soul open to the whole cosmos[3], and so DIZZY(!) - !!![3], and, but, oh, but ... you've got to control the spinning[3], and it can be hard on your brain if you're using it to understand all the words ... ah, best not[3], and, yes, yes, yes ... follow me, kook(s), uh, the expert[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and tell me, son, daughter, do you feel - ?[3], and it's like a goddamn disease![3], and only rock stardom can stop me now ...[3], and we ain't chasing rainbows ... / and we ain't chasing ghosts in the desert ...[3], and consciousness ness ain't what it used to be[3], and 539, 540, 541, 542, 543, 544, 545, 546, 547, 548 ... / and I won't lie to you: I can't wait![3], and beautiful you ...[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... / ... and let's hope it doesn't go out of style[3], and really hope, yeah?[3], and, man ... I want the same results, always / and Einstein didn't have a fucking clue, seriously[3], and do it, do it, do it ... again![3], and

Most UK residents have less than one month's salary in savings ...

Well, well ... it's not exactly news, dear reader(s). No one has any money. 'No one has ever had any money, boss. Only the rich. But they like to pretend that everyone can get their hands on some. It's a shame, really.' Yes, thank you, Voice.

A recent UK wide survey conducted by Paymentsense has revealed that 45.5m UK residents have less than one month's salary set aside in savings. In addition to this, the study also found that 30% of us don't in fact have any money set aside in a savings account, to protect us from unforeseen circumstances.

Okay, okay. It's a PR email. As I say, it's not news, but it's certainly something to think about. Imagine what the situation will be like when we get the Brexit apocalypse in a couple of years. 'It doesn't bear thinking about, boss. Of course, the likes of Boris Johnson and Nigel Farage will be okay. Oh, they'll be sitting pretty, they will. Ha!' Will you shut up, Voice? Please!

It also seems that many of us may in fact be leaning on credit cards to keep us in the black, with over 66% of survey respondents admitting that they owned one or more credit cards and a staggering 79% of those credit card owners confirming that they use these cards as a means to backup expenses.

Credit cards! An invention of the devil! 'Ha! But you've got your American Express diamond card, haven't you?' What?! 'That card, man. Made out of pure diamond.' Don't be an idiot! / Don't listen to him, reader(s).

Well, what are people saving for? (I mean, those who can save ...)

So those with savings, what are they saving for? The new findings show that 21% make a holiday their top priority. The percentages were lower when it came to long-term saving goals - like buying a house (10%) and retirement (17%). Just 9% of people save for their children's futures, which might include education fees or deposit for a first home.

Christ! They don't care about their kids. Unbelievable! 'Boss, money is the root of all evil!' Right, Voice, that's enough. Fuck off now, please. / Okay. Spokesperson time ...

A spokesperson from Paymentsense commented, "There's no denying it - it's harder to save now than it's ever been and as a result many of us are falling back on credit cards and loans to keep ourselves in the black. With many of us reflecting on our childhoods and wishing we had taken heed more around advice to budget more, refrain from buying things we can't afford and save more, maybe it's time to reflect on the size of our rainy day fund and top it up a little."

And that's it. All the "news" that's fit to put on the internet this morning.

...

Anything else? Not a lot. I'll be working on a conceptual later. You know how I like to get a-ROUND.

Music? My music? I've nearly finished the lyric for my new song. It should make fourth place on the demo. 'That fourth song you've already got is a potential classic, Mikey.' Well, thank you, Voice. It's very nice of you to say so.

What a lovely voice he/it is!

Palamon to acquire Business School24 ...

Acquire, again. Never mind. It was always going to happen. 'They were always going to acquire it, boss?' No, Voice, I mean someone was going to send me a PR email about some firm acquiring something. 'And has Business School24 been acquired yet?' No. They've just, uh ... signed an agreement.

Palamon Capital Partners ("Palamon" or the "Firm"), a pan-European growth investor, announces that it has signed an agreement to acquire Business School24 SpA ("Business School24" or the "Company") the education and services unit of Il Sole 24 Ore S.p.A ("Il Sole"), Italy's leading business newspaper.

Christ! The "Firm" and the "Company". Whatever next?!

Palamon will ("Will") acquire 49% of the Company at an enterprise valuation of €80 million with a call option to acquire an additional 2% in May 2018. The sale agreement has arrangements in place ("Place") for Palamon to acquire additional equity with Il Sole agreeing to retain a minimum 20% strategic stake in the Company going forward.

Oh, I see. It's "Will" and "Place" now. Just at random, like. We must have our little jokes, mustn't we, PR people? 'Why do you tolerate it, boss?' I don't know, man. I suppose I'm a glutton for punishment. / Anyway, what's this Business School24 all about?

Business School24 is a leading player in the tertiary education segment and provides professionally-oriented postgraduate education and training. Established in 1991 as a business unit of Il Sole 24 Ore, the school has two headquarters in Milan and Rome and enrols more than 26,000 students a year onto its courses based both in classrooms and online. The Company differentiates itself by creating targeted courses focused on the real needs of business and employs highly experienced industry professionals to originate content and deliver lessons. Most courses incorporate an internship, which presents a highly successful pathway to employment.

Okay. Fair enough. 'It sounds all right.' Yes. I have to say though, I'm very disappointed that Fabio Massimo Giuseppetti hasn't said anything about all this. You would think he might release a statement. It would be the professional thing to do. However - 'Who the bloody hell is Fabio Massimo Giuseppetti?!?!' Don't you know, Voice? He's a partner at Palamon. 'Oh, Fab! You mean Fab? Our Fab. Of course. Yes, yes, he did say something.' Did he?! 'Look -'

Commenting on the investment, Fabio Massimo Giuseppetti, partner of Palamon Capital Partners, said: "Business School24 is one of the most widely respected education brands in Italy and it is playing a key role in overcoming the structural disconnection between tertiary education and employment, which is severely undermining graduate prospects and damaging the economy. We are therefore delighted to be partnering with the Company to help accelerate growth in the provision of specialized vocational training and a pathway to the labour market for its students. We look forward to working with the talented management team and building out the platform over the years to come."

Where did you find that? 'It's all in the email, boss.' Oh. Nice one. 'I suppose you want to hear what Moscetti, the CEO of Business School24, said as well?' No. Not if he only has one name. 'Ha!' Moscetti! Seriously! The ego of some of these people is unbelievable. He ain't Sting, for crying out loud! He ain't Cher!

...

Ah, that's enough. Anything else, dear reader(s)? No. I'll see you the week after next week. / Later(s), crocodile(s)!

Maitland has bought R&H Fund Services

Or it's going to buy R&H Fund Services (Guernsey) Ltd soon. 'Acquire, boss.' What, Voice? 'Maitland Group is going to acquire R&H.' What's the difference? 'Well, to me, it suggests that Maitland isn't paying any money for it.' What?! Ha! That would be outrageous, man. Of course they're paying. 'Then why are they talking about "acquire", boss?' Oh, you know nothing. It's just a poncey way of talking, that's all. It means they bought R&H. 'They haven't it bought it yet.' They're going to buy it! Please shut up.

Okay. About Maitland Group -

Maitland is a global advisory, administration and family office firm providing seamless legal, fiduciary, investment and fund administration services to private, corporate and institutional clients across multiple jurisdictions.

Our tailored solutions embrace complexity to deliver simplicity by combining our talent, one-firm approach and best-of-breed multi-jurisdictional platforms.

We are privately owned and fully independent with 18 offices in 13 jurisdictions, 1,400 employees and over $280 billion in assets under administration.

We leverage our strong values and a collaborative culture to develop and maintain trusted relationships with our clients.

That sounds all right, don't it, dear reader(s)? / The good news is, no one at R&H is going to lose their job. 'All's well that ends well.' Exactly, Voice! And it's not even the end. They probably have a very exciting future. 'Let's hope so.' Yes.

...

Yes, let's hope we all have a very exciting future. Let's hope the ex-game-show host doesn't release fire and fury.

Anything else? No, not a lot. I'll be writing another post this afternoon, my last of the week. 'Oh, early finish.' Yes, early finish. Then I'll be taking a week off. 'Nice.' Yes.

Still no PR emails. Everyone's gone off somewhere. And there's no news, much. I don't know what I'm going to write about later. I really don't. 'What's happening at Aviva Investors, boss?' Ha! Apparently, they're upset about the awful weather we've been having. They can't go to the park when it's like winter. 'But they have the pub.' Yes. They'll always have the pub ...

[No. 537] Tyger

You've got to be a tyger in this life.

And, kook(s), come on![1], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[1], and, kook(s), come on![2], and it's a jungle out there, man![1], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[2], and ... or a forest[1], and it's a jungle out there, man![2], and in here ...[1], and ... or a forest[2], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![1], and in here ...[2], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[1], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![2], and burning bright, yes[1], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[2], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[1], and burning bright, yes[2], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![1], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[2], and there, on the floor![1], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![2], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[1], and there, on the floor![2], and don't be scared of squares in the world[1], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[2], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[1], and don't be scared of squares in the world[2], and, uh ... maybe we should[1], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[2], and they've had it their own way for far too long[1], and, uh ... maybe we should[2], and I need a break ...[1], and they've had it their own way for far too long[2], and I will go OFF, for a while[1], and I need a break ...[2], and something is needed: more energy![1], and I will go OFF, for a while[2], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[1], and something is needed: more energy![2], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[1], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[2], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[1], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[2], and I see them again: those little white crests![1], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[2], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![1], and I see them again: those little white crests![2], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[1], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![2], and, kook(s), come on![3], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[2], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[3], and it's a jungle out there, man![3], and ... or a forest[3], and in here ...[3], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![3], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[3], and burning bright, yes[3], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[3], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![3], and there, on the floor![3], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[3], and don't be scared of squares in the world[3], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[3], and, uh ... maybe we should[3], and they've had it their own way for far too long[3], and I need a break ...[3], and I will go OFF, for a while[3], and something is needed: more energy![3], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[3], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[3], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[3], and I see them again: those little white crests![3], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![3], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[3], and

And, kook(s), come on![1], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[1], and, kook(s), come on![2], and it's a jungle out there, man![1], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[2], and ... or a forest[1], and it's a jungle out there, man![2], and in here ...[1], and ... or a forest[2], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![1], and in here ...[2], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[1], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![2], and burning bright, yes[1], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[2], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[1], and burning bright, yes[2], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![1], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[2], and there, on the floor![1], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![2], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[1], and there, on the floor![2], and don't be scared of squares in the world[1], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[2], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[1], and don't be scared of squares in the world[2], and, uh ... maybe we should[1], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[2], and they've had it their own way for far too long[1], and, uh ... maybe we should[2], and I need a break ...[1], and they've had it their own way for far too long[2], and I will go OFF, for a while[1], and I need a break ...[2], and something is needed: more energy![1], and I will go OFF, for a while[2], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[1], and something is needed: more energy![2], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[1], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[2], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[1], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[2], and I see them again: those little white crests![1], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[2], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![1], and I see them again: those little white crests![2], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[1], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![2], and, kook(s), come on![3], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[2], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[3], and it's a jungle out there, man![3], and ... or a forest[3], and in here ...[3], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![3], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[3], and burning bright, yes[3], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[3], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![3], and there, on the floor![3], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[3], and don't be scared of squares in the world[3], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[3], and, uh ... maybe we should[3], and they've had it their own way for far too long[3], and I need a break ...[3], and I will go OFF, for a while[3], and something is needed: more energy![3], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[3], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[3], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[3], and I see them again: those little white crests![3], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![3], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[3], and

And, kook(s), come on![1], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[1], and, kook(s), come on![2], and it's a jungle out there, man![1], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[2], and ... or a forest[1], and it's a jungle out there, man![2], and in here ...[1], and ... or a forest[2], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![1], and in here ...[2], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[1], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![2], and burning bright, yes[1], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[2], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[1], and burning bright, yes[2], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![1], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[2], and there, on the floor![1], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![2], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[1], and there, on the floor![2], and don't be scared of squares in the world[1], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[2], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[1], and don't be scared of squares in the world[2], and, uh ... maybe we should[1], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[2], and they've had it their own way for far too long[1], and, uh ... maybe we should[2], and I need a break ...[1], and they've had it their own way for far too long[2], and I will go OFF, for a while[1], and I need a break ...[2], and something is needed: more energy![1], and I will go OFF, for a while[2], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[1], and something is needed: more energy![2], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[1], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[2], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[1], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[2], and I see them again: those little white crests![1], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[2], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![1], and I see them again: those little white crests![2], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[1], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![2], and, kook(s), come on![3], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[2], and not a tiger, but a tyger / and I can't stress that enough[3], and it's a jungle out there, man![3], and ... or a forest[3], and in here ...[3], and, seriously ... you don't want to be a fucking dormouse![3], and I hope YOU(!) ... will be paying attention, even so DIZZY(!), like[3], and burning bright, yes[3], and I know you're a CRAZY CAT, but sometimes that ain't enough, you dig?[3], and can you hear a squeaking sound? / and, no, no, no ... oh, my sick imagination![3], and there, on the floor![3], and it's the chickens that are the trouble, really[3], and don't be scared of squares in the world[3], and so many of them are just BIG CHICKENS - !!! ... / ... and maybe we shouldn't judge them[3], and, uh ... maybe we should[3], and they've had it their own way for far too long[3], and I need a break ...[3], and I will go OFF, for a while[3], and something is needed: more energy![3], and when I get back from where I'm going to ... there will be some changes, believe me[3], and ... 'Christ! Where, Mikey?!'[3], and, ha! ... relax, not beyond the THREE, Voice, ah, not in this wretched life[3], and I see them again: those little white crests![3], and squares' visions are ten a penny, if they even have them / and ... but mine are priceless![3], and pray for me, kook(s), and I will pray for you[3], and