Thursday 12 December 2013

Paul Abberley has left Aviva Investors

I don't blame him. I really don't. I mean, what's the point of living your life like that? 'It's a waste, man.' Yeah. / Paul Abberley was the chief executive for a while, as you know, dear reader(s). But he got tired of that nonsense (it was hard, actually), so he went back to being head of investments. 'Ha! He couldn't stomach it though, after the top job.' Well, Voice, a lot of people are becoming dissatisfied with finance, you know, not just Paul. 'But it's not as if they do any work at Aviva Investors, is it? Schroders manages all the funds!' Yes, Schroders takes care of the business, man, but - 'Crazy! / So what do these Aviva nutjobs do all day? Play with Lego?' You're getting them mixed up with the Cantab lot. No, they've been taking my advice. They just go for long walks in the park, and eat ice creams. 'What, in winter?!' Er, well, probably not. I don't know, man. Maybe they go to the pub.

Yes, the pub, the pub! They go to the pub. It's freezing outside. They won't be in the park now. / I'll be going to the pub tomorrow. My day off. There's a fire. I like fire. 'You like blood!' I like blood and fire, son! / But I'll be working on another conceptual ... later, after lunch, and ... into the evening, the dark, No. ... 178. '178!' / I might do something for the Aviva mob. 'Oh, not again, Mikey!' Shut up! / I'll get a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND. And I’ll get them a-ROUND, one more time! / I want to help them, Voice. 'Why?!' I know they don't like working for a living, but it's not healthy spending every day in the pub - if that's what they're doing. 'Moderation in all things, boss.' Yeah. / I have a heart of gold, me.