Tuesday, 8 August 2017

The latest on Martin Coward's dormouse

We've all been concerned about the health of Martin's pet dormouse over the years, haven't we, dear reader(s)? Sometimes it puts on weight, sometimes it loses weight. The good news, though, is ... it's still alive! And, more than that, it put on 2.88% of weight last month. 'What, just in July, boss?!' Yes, Voice, just in July. 'What has it been eating?' Christ knows. Who cares anyway? We just want the dormouse to be healthy.

We all know about Mr Coward's troubles. This dormouse is the only thing he has in his life. If he ever lost it, well ... 'It doesn't bear thinking about, boss.' No, it doesn't.

Oh, this if from one of my posts in 2014 -

Martin Coward was planning to start his own hedge fund. However, he didn't have enough money. And he got depressed. So he decided to spend more time with his pet dormouse instead. Unfortunately, the dormouse is poorly now. It needs treatment at the vets. And that's why Mr Coward wants your money, dear reader(s). Yes, he wants you to invest in his dormouse, or take a share in it, or adopt it ... er, I don't know what’s going on with this guy. We've all seen the adverts on TV: Adopt a tiger and get a free cuddly tiger toy! This is the same sort of thing, although Martin won't even be sending you the toy.

You see? It's an ongoing saga. 'More drama than Dynasty.' Yeah. Definitely.


Anyway, I suppose you want to hear about my music ... ? But this is a finance blog, man.

Jesus H. - !!! / Okay.

That new tune I got last week? I rearranged it. Big time. Instead of being a small and rather nice album track [two minutes twenty seconds], it's now a potential hit [four minutes]. The original rhythm was too bland, and similar to another rhythm I have, so I changed it, and then the tune became longer somehow [well, repetition]. I just need a lyric now. I'd like it to be the fourth song on the demo. The song that is currently fourth could potentially be matched by anyone around today. I mean, professional artists, you dig? However, I would like a four-song demo that ... no one can touch. Because there are countless singer/songwriters and bands on Twitter, looking for deals ...

Maybe I'll be ready by October, and maybe I won't.

Anyway, later(s), pop fan(s)! / 'No. 537, Mikey?' Later, Voice.