Tuesday, 6 December 2011

Jonathan Polin has bought 0.74 per cent of Ashcourt Rowan Group

So he's really been splashing out then. Jonathan is the chief executive of Ashcourt Rowan now. I knew he would end up somewhere, different. I couldn't see him stranded at nowhere for long. (Yes, he gave it a go.) Of course, I advised him to stick with nowhere, after leaving the old somewhere. These people don't listen to me. I may as well be writing this stuff for myself. You can't save everyone. Not everyone wants to be saved. They don't want to join the brotherhood, with a few sisters thrown in for good measure, no. A lot of them think they're better off at a fast-growing wealth management organization. They imagine they make a difference for people who want to make their money work harder, but don't have the expertise, time nor perhaps inclination, to do it well. / It's, er, very depressing.

I'm trying not to give in to dark thoughts. I, er, I, I / I don't want to be depressed. Maybe I, er, I should just accept the fact/[theory] that these wretched puppets have "lives" of their own. [Ha!] Oh, it's hard to believe, but that's what I've been told. They tell me, incredibly 'Mr Fowke, I'm a real man, a real hedge fund manager. I, er, I have a wife, and children.' Pathetic. How can they delude themselves? They only exist because I exist. I am the one who gives them life. I am the one, I

I have taken full control of the financial world. This was always my destiny. The people who don't listen? I, er, they are the dead. They do not exist. / I have a soft spot for Jonathan Polin, so I've written about him today. However, I'm not sure I'll be writing about him again. If [I] he were nowhere, it would be different. But he is somewhere, and that / that somewhere sickens me because it is not real. Somewhere is an illusion. Fools are happy with their somewheres. I just thought [I] Jonathan was better than that, that's / that is all. It's that /

I / I am alive / And I must please myself for there is no one else. I [I] can't hear voices that can't be heard. [I] I, er, I can't, can't see bodies that can't be seen. Impossible. There is a limit. There is, I have reached it. / We (?) understand, I ... / At the end of visions there are words for a big nothing. / Right at the

Jonathan, if you are here, cry out to me. We are nowhere, if you are here. Or am I on my own, totally, alone?


What? What was that? I heard a voice call my name. Jonathan! Is that you? Where are you?

/ Silence /

Jesus! I'm hearing voices - again. Let me see a body, too. / I can't see a thing. That wasn't a voice. It

Silence / I imagine it is, silence