Wednesday, 16 April 2014

Chris Higham made some money out of F&C Asset Management

It's a bit complicated though. You see, Chris had some bonds in F&C. Or his fund did. The Aviva Investors Strategic Bond fund. (So it isn't actually his fund. It probably isn't Aviva Investors' fund either. I think you'll find that Schroders does all the work.) Then Bank of Montreal bought F&C. Then Chris got 15 per cent. Of the bonds. No, the money. Or the increase in something. I don't know how it works, exactly. I'm on the mystical side, man - as you know. 'Yeah.' The point is, Chris is doing all right. 'Life of Riley, boss.' I mean, all right for someone who spends most of his time in the pub, with the rest of the Aviva Investors mob. Because this finance game is too much like hard work. And I don't blame Chris. And I don't blame the rest of them.

It's nearly ice-cream-in-the-park season, ain't it? If you're one of Chris' clients and you see him with a suntan soon, you'll know why. / Aviva Investors is showing the way, the new way. After the collapse of the desert - 'You shut it down, Mikey.' Whatever, Voice. But it's gone, yeah? Those burning days are gone, as Yeats might have said. 'Dancing days.' Well, we were dancing too. Of course we were. / Er ... Where was I? 'The desert.' Yeah, the desert is dead, man. Astral and physical. It's over. 'Oh.' So what's left? Work? 'Ha!' Only if you're a square, son. This Aviva lot aren't a bunch of squares. 'No.' So they spend the autumn and winter in the pub, and a bit of spring and summer in the park. 'Nice. Better than playing with Lego, eh?' Well, those Cantab Capital Partners guys are fucking mental, Voice. Forget about them. 'They should grow up, boss.' I know. But it beats working for a living, I suppose. You've got to give them that. 'Yeah.' / Lunch? Not long to go ...