Tuesday, 19 September 2017

Longford Capital gets $500 million for its second fund!

Well, that's not too bad, $500 million. 'How much did they want, boss?' Er ... $500 million. 'Oh, so you're telling me and the readers that they wanted $500 million, so they went out and raised the money, and then ended up with $500 million?' That's exactly what I'm telling you, Voice. 'But what about all these stories we cover where a firm wants, I don't know, say $600 million, and then they get $850 million, and everyone is over the moon because they got more than they wanted? What about those stories, boss?' This isn't one of those stories, man. 'Oh.' They wanted to raise $500 million, and they got it. What's your problem?

Okay, okay. This Longford Capital is based in Chicago and it invests in commercial litigation. The new fund is called, rather imaginatively, Longford Capital Fund II. And this is from their website -

Longford Capital is a private investment company that invests in commercial litigation believed to be high value and meritorious. We provide capital to (i) companies to pay attorneys' fees and expenses incurred in litigation and (ii) invest in portfolios of cases managed by leading law firms. If the litigation is successful, Longford Capital is paid back its investment plus an agreed upon return. If the litigation is unsuccessful, the client owes us nothing.

We manage a diversified portfolio of legal claims, and consider investments in business-to-business contract claims and other commercial claims, antitrust and trade regulation claims, intellectual property claims (including patent, trademark, copyright and trade secret), fiduciary duty claims, fraud claims, domestic and international arbitration, claims in bankruptcy and liquidation and a variety of others.

You see, dear reader(s)? And now they've got $500 million to play with. 'It could have been so much more.' Will you give it a rest, Voice?! 'Well, is there something wrong with $700 million?' Christ! There's nothing wrong with $700 million, but they don't need that much. Just let them run their business the way they want to. It's got nothing to do with you, you little idiot!

I must apologize to anyone here from Longford Capital. He's my intern on this blog. But I can't really get the staff. And he's just a disembodied voice, anyway, from the astral plane, like. 'Ha!' What? 'You make it sound like it's a bad thing.' Just shut up! Please.


Anything else? Well ... the national debt? Why has it doubled in seven years? I'm just wondering ... / I don't want to go too far into the subject, dear reader(s), because it's bloody boring. 'Go on then.' Well, that's it. 'Oh, okay.' I'm just wondering why it has doubled in the last seven years, that's all. And where has the money gone? It's not as if we've seen any improvements in society. Actually, things have been getting worse.

Never mind. / Music? This is my last music update. Seriously. There's no need to discuss it any more. I'm hoping to finish my tenth song this week, which would give me an album of forty and a half minutes. (It would be nice to have an eleventh song though.) / The two weakest songs on that album would be It's Just a Joke, Man and She Loves Me from the last demo. And they're not too weak compared to a lot that gets written these days, so I'm happy. 'Yippee!' Yeah. Yippee!