Monday, 11 February 2008

IMF chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn: spotting financial crises

Dominique Strauss-Kahn, the managing director of the International Monetary Fund, reckons the IMF is brilliant at spotting brewing financial crises - much better than the Financial Stability Forum.

I have been speaking to Arthur Simmons from the Chaos College of Finance about this, and he says, 'The IMF can't spot jackshit. Do you know it doesn't employ one financial shaman? Not one! My graduates have been turned away. The IMF says it doesn't have any time for witch doctors and associated goofballs. Are these people insane? Why don't they ask themselves a few questions? Like: Would Goldman Sachs be the most powerful investment bank in the world without its secretive shamans committee? Er, no. Is Barclays Capital bitterly regretting the fact that it didn't employ any shamans or mystics as managing directors the other month? Er, yes. Was that picture of a small figure on the surface of Mars a genuine alien? Well, I don't know. But you can see what I'm getting at, can't you?'