Wednesday 12 August 2009

Andy Lynch: "chunky losses" at Santander!

For those of you who don't know and may not even care, Andy Lynch manages the Euro Dynamic Growth Fund at Schroders. That's the sort of man he is, and I'm not going to judge him. Anyway, he reckons Santander is going to have "chunky losses" on its loan books in the next few years - mainly because the management team at this banco can't walk on water. And it gets better. Andy told some Reuters cupcake: 'It's a bit like heroin. You keep having to take more of it to get the same hit.' Fuck me! But what does it all mean?

LET THE MAN EXPLAIN HIMSELF.

Andy says to no one in particular, for he is drowning somewhere in the depths of his subconscious and he ain't never going home: 'It's a chunk a hunk of burning love, man. You think I don't know about the desert? You think I don't know about losses? I HAVE BEEN LOST! I HAVE BEEN FOUND! But I don't care. You know why? BECAUSE I AM ADDICTED! Addicted to the love that burns forever - great big chunks of the shit, streaming down a river of consciousness from the universal Godhead, through Big Herb, through Ganesh, and straight into my eyeballs where they hit me harder than any fucking drug, man! And that's what I've been trying to tell the senors, but they won't fucking listen! They cannot dig these chunks. So they will suffer the loss of chunks. Loads of them. I can see into the future. I know it's coming. THEY WILL LOSE EVERYTHING if they are not willing to rock us on the water, baby. Be my, be my baby, be my little baby. BUT THAT'S BESIDE THE POINT! What I'm trying to say, what I mean is, it was party time in Spain. It really was. But now, now, oh, let's just overhaul our portfolios. Can you dig that?'

As I said, he is talking to no one in particular. Maybe we should just leave him be.