Friday 28 June 2013

Aviva Investors has got itself yet another interim chief executive

Dear oh dear, eh? / What the hell is going on at Aviva Investors?! 'I couldn't tell you, Mikey.' It used to have a chief executive, you know. 'Yeah.' His name was Alain Dromer - if you can believe that. But he got fed up and went off somewhere. 'To a better life, no doubt.' Then Paul Abberley took over. 'Ha! What happened to him?' Well, he didn't like it, Voice. It was too much like hard work, apparently. So he's gone back to being head of investments. 'Christ. Who's the chief now, then, man?' Some character by the name of John Misselbrook. 'Oh. Never heard of him.' Neither have I. God knows how long he will last. 'Where did they find this John?' He was some sort of non-executive director on the board, I think. 'Unbelievable! So, what are you going to do about it?' After lunch, I'm going to take Mr Misselbrook for a short spin. 'No. 132? How will that help?' It's all I can think of, son. I don't know nothing else.

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Yes, I'll get Mr Misselbrook off to a flying start with my conceptual shit. I'm sure No. 132 will be good for morale at Aviva Investors. I haven't got a contract or anything. I'm not getting paid for my shamanic services. It'll be a free one. I'm a humanitarian, after all. These people need my help.