Thursday 17 December 2015

Expect and prepare for market volatility in 2016, investors warned

Oh dear! / Yeah, it's the Thursday night PR email, back by popular demand. I actually received it before the Fed rate rise, but it's still relevant -

Investors should expect and prepare for volatility across global financial markets in the first half of 2016, warns a leading investment analyst at one of the world's largest independent financial advisory organizations.

Lovely! Happy Christmas!

The warning from Tom Elliott, senior international investment strategist at deVere Group, comes ahead of the Federal Reserve's highly anticipated rate announcement this week, and after the recent acrimonious OPEC meeting which triggered a collapse in the oil price. / Mr Elliott affirms: "Investors should expect volatile financial markets in the first half of next year, as stock and bond markets learn how aggressive the Fed is likely to be in its monetary tightening. There are, however, a few safe bets. The European Central Bank (ECB) last week revealed itself to be less willing to expand its QE program than had been supposed, which somewhat undermines the strong dollar/weak euro bet that underlies much stock and bond market asset allocation."

Oh, there's more, of course. But I think we've had enough, don't you, dear reader(s)? Someone should tell this Tommy Elliott character that it's Christmas. 'You tell him, boss!' We just want to enjoy ourselves now. We don't want to start crapping ourselves about next year. / And what did Seneca say? Well, he said: A man who suffers before it is necessary, suffers more than is necessary. 'Brilliant, Mikey!' Yes, Voice. It's one of my favourite sayings.

So, if you're reading this, Tommy ... you're out of order, son, all right? You should spend a bit more time eating mince pies, and not so much time worrying about shit you can't control. We all know the world is a sewer, Tommy. We don't need you making it worse.

...

Ah, that's enough, already! / I'm taking next week off, so I'll see you again, kook(s), after Christmas. I hope you have a nice time and that. Laters.