Wednesday, 23 November 2016

How black can Friday get?

I dunno. I mean, am I supposed to know? / Yes, dear reader(s), it's the Wednesday morning PR email, back by popular demand. This isn't a financial one. I normally ignore the ones that aren't financial ones. 'You normally ignore the ones that are financial ones, boss.' Yes, Voice. Most of them. BUT(!) ... this one is about Black Friday. 'Ha!' Which is utterly ridiculous, by the way. This is not America. 'Great song!' What?! 'I said, great song, boss.' What is?! 'Bowie and Metheny!' Shut up! Idiot!

Anyway ...

Your Black Friday bargains might be overpriced and non-returnable by Boxing Day, warns e-commerce delivery specialist Fastlane International.

I ain't getting no bargains, man. I ain't American. I refuse to get involved!

Following last week's Which? report revealing half of all Black Friday Bargains were in fact cheaper in the months before and after Black Friday last year; the e-delivery specialists Fastlane International has a further warning to shoppers buying gifts for Christmas: many return periods will be expired by Boxing Day.

Don't do it, people! Remember you're British! [Uh, American readers, do what the hell you like. Am I bothered?]

Fastlane International's Head of Consumer Research, David Jinks MILT says: "Why are we not exactly surprised about Black Friday being less full of bargains than the shops would have us believe? The Which? findings reinforce our recommendation that it pays bargain hunters to research and buy their Black Friday deals online rather than buy on impulse in store. But read the returns deadline small print before you buy."

Even better, don't buy nothing, yeah? Unless you're American. / Well, more advice -

Black Friday falls quite early this year. Don't let the 14 day dates catch you out!

Savvy consumers should approach Black Friday with a strong idea of what they want to buy.

Purchase online, rather than in store, and you are protected against any misleading price claims - and many other issues. The vast majority of products can be sent back within 14 days - without having to give a reason. It's now law as part of the Government's 2014 Consumer Contracts Regulations.

In contrast, shop purchased items only have the right to be returned if they are faulty. Brick and mortar shops only have to conform to the Consumer Rights Act: so you may be stuck with your Black Friday non-bargain. Some shops do offer a more generous returns policy - and if they have one they are legally obliged to honour it - but these vary greatly; and by no means all shops do.

Okay, so this guy, this David Jinks, has a hard-on for the internet. Fair enough. It's a new age!


Anything else? Music? I'm feeling in a reasonably positive mood, so I'll have a go at recording my songs today. However, I don't do updates no more. That's the last one!

What am I listening to? Just one song. The Long and Winding Road ... featuring John Lennon's passive-aggressive bass playing.

What else? NOTHING ELSE. Well, nothing I want to talk about, you dig? So, laters. See you tomorrow, blog fans(s)!