Thursday, 9 March 2017

Numis has apologized to Schroders

Oh, that's nice. It was the right thing to do, I think. 'Why? What's this all about, boss?' Christ! You keep asking me that? What's it all about? What's it all about? This blog ... is about finance, Voice. Deal with it! [Except for my conceptual posts, which ain't about NOTHING ... just EVERYTHING, you dig? 'And "everything" said the way Gary Oldman says "everyone", in that film, like.' Yes. Certainly.] Well, well ...

The thing is, Numis had no idea that Schroders does all the work, too, for Aviva Investors. Apart from its own work, I mean. 'Ha! Shocking! And what do the Aviva Investors mob do?' Er, well ... this time of year? They'll be getting ready to move out of the pub and into the local park. 'Jesus!' It's actually going to be very sunny and quite warm today, so ... 'Ice creams all round, yeah?' I wouldn't be surprised, Voice. 'H. - ! Life of Riley!' Tell me about it.

Anyway, yeah, uh ... Numis apologized because last week it criticized a Schroders press release saying that 74 per cent of the firm's assets had outperformed their benchmark over three years, rising to ... 85 per cent over five years. Or something. I don't know. I don't really care. 'Numis reckons the performance figures were disingenuous. They've changed their minds now though.' Whatever, man. It doesn't matter. I only know those poor Schroders mugs are working themselves into an early grave. It's too much.

Having said that ... what are Aviva Investors supposed to do? 'Start working for a living?' Ha! Not in this lifetime, son. They're anarchists, anti-capitalists. 'Wasters.' Oh, that's harsh. Listen, I've said it before and I'll say it again - 'Aviva Investors is a refuge from the modern world, boss.' Yes, thank you. I was just going to say that. I don't need you to finish my sentences for me.

Well, well ... where was I? Where am I? Oh, I don't actually want to see Aviva Investors change its culture, you know? I'm just worried about Schroders, that's all. 'It might be a nice idea if the Aviva Investors mob were to invite the Schroders mugs to the pub one time.' Yeah. The Schroders lot are a bunch of squares though, as well as being mugs. I couldn't see it working. 'Never mind, man.'


Uh ... / But never mind, eh? Let's have some music, reader(s)! 'What are you putting on, Mikey?' Happy Mondays. Greatest Hits. For a change.

My music? Oh, I ain't scrapping that new tune, after all. 'Make your mind up!' I went off it, temporarily, because I was playing it with the wrong chord in a certain place. 'Eh?' I wasn't playing the tune the way I wrote it, so it sounded bad. But now it's good again, and I'm happy! 'Nice one!'

If I get the lyrics quickly, it could make fourth spot on my new demo, although I have a pretty decent song already prepared for that position, so ... let's wait and see.

Laters. / Last post of the week, a conceptual, No. 495, tonight, you dig?