Friday 23 January 2009

Frits Seegers: he borrowed against his shares!

So what? There are worse things he could have done. Mr Seegers - a top executive at Barclays - borrowed money to fund a £952,000 share purchase, with his stake in Barclays as collateral. So what?

I have been speaking to Susan Flint from Bad Moon Investments, and she said, 'So what? There are worse things he could have done. He could have sold his soul to the devil. He could have done a business deal with the demonic financier Jack Pickles. He could have gone to one of Keith Busby's ludicrous mystical healing workshops. (Oh, Susan, leave Keith alone. He's all right.) Keith's a tosser, and you know it. But back to Frits. He could have insulted Ganesh the elephant god by harping on about his appearance. (Yeah, Ganesh doesn't like anyone taking the piss. Although I think he looks really cool. I love that big elephant, man.) Michael, don't call me 'man'. I am not one of your weed-smoking hippie friends. But back to Frits. He could have cut himself off from the world, and given in to despair. He could have chosen a lonely road. And he could have blinded himself. (Really?) Yes. To a wild tune, he could have pierced his eyeballs time and time again, till bloody tears ran down his beard - (Does he have a beard?) - not drops, but in full spate a whole cascade descending in drenching cataracts of scarlet rain. Yes, Michael, there are worse things he could have done.'

Fuckin' A! Susan. Fuckin' A!