Tuesday, 29 April 2008

The truth about Jack Pickles

From reading my emails, I know a lot of you are concerned about Jack Pickles. Some of you have had the audacity to say that he’s not real. That he is just some character I've invented to scare the living shit out of bankers and traders. Well, why would I do that? You say that if he were real you would have heard about him in the mainstream media. How na├»ve are you people? Don't you realize this bastard controls the media? All he has to do is make one phone call to Rupert Murdoch. Even more insultingly, one or two of you have suggested that I might be Jack Pickles myself, and that this 'Michael Fowke' persona is just a cover for my demonic activities. Get a life.

Jack and I used to be best friends. We were like brothers. BUT THEN HE TURNED TO THE DARK SIDE OF MONEY! And I know what you're thinking now. You're thinking - I didn't even realize there was a dark side to money. Oh yes, my children, there is a dark side. I often write in this blog about the mystical burning of money. A true financial shaman is able to control this burning and make it work for him. What happened with Jack was that the burning got out of control and dominated his life. And his aura - which should have been a lovely yellow colour - turned absolutely fucking black! I can't stress this strongly enough. His aura was fucking black! The burning had destroyed all the goodness in him. And that is the dark side of money. And that is why you quite often find money mystics who don't want to go the whole hog and become financial shamans. It can be a dangerous business. So, the story of Jack Pickles should be a lesson to us all.