Monday 19 September 2011

Kay Haigh is launching his Avantium Investment Management, a new hedge fund ... global macro

Next month. Yes, global macro. But I don't know what he's going to do for a website. Someone seems to have taken his firm's name for a site. I suspect he'll have to pay out big money to get his hands on it. Or his mind. How do you physically touch a website? And it's not even a proper website yet. Just a domain name, really. However, it's not my problem, and I don't even know why I'm writing about it. I should be writing about the fact Kay Haigh will be dabbling in all this macro nonsense that Lee Robinson and I have been warning everyone about. (Kay, ask Lee. He'll show you the scars.) No one listens to us.

So, the EM Macro Master fund will be unleashed upon the world next month, and it will have over $200 million in assets - for starters. Of course, it’s none of my business, and I'm not even interested. I want to get back to the grandeur of last week. I don't want to be writing about global macro. I'm above all that. I'm practically living on Mount Olympus these days, and you want me to write about global macro? Get the fuck outta here!

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Oh dear.

One day, after my ship has come in, I'm going to slow things down a bit. I'll spend hundreds of thousands of pounds promoting this blog, but I'll only write when I'm feeling all elevated. That's the plan, anyway. But nothing ever goes to plan, does it? Not with me. Today, I'm in the foul rag and bone shop of the heart. And it's disgusting. I absolutely hate it here. It certainly wasn't a part of my plan for the start of this week.

Well, at least I'm going to be having Disco crisps with my lunch. That's something to look forward to. (They're actually big flavoured crunchy snacks. I'm not sure the manufacturer will appreciate my calling them "crisps". I'm such a c**t sometimes.)