Thursday, 1 September 2011

Who is Leigh Himsworth?

And why the hell does he deserve to have Eden Financial launching some kind of crazy ass CF Eden UK Select Opportunities fund for his benefit? Like he's someone special. [Like a potential god?] He's only a new recruit, that's all. What the hell is going on?

I'm really annoyed about this. No one launches funds for me. [I am so close to becoming a god. I dream of the elevation.] I've been writing this blog for almost five years now. There hasn't been one launch of any sort of fund in my honour. And I'm starting to feel unappreciated. I want to caress someone with a razor. Oh, the cold steel! The look in their eyes. Moorgate. I'll be out for a victim. Someone with a rough face I can work with. Yes, I'm a vegetarian with a passion for human flesh! But I won't eat it. I'll take a couple of cheese rolls with me.

'At the heart of Eden lies a dynamic culture wholly focused on the delivery of investment excellence and high quality client service. This commitment is uncompromising. It touches every aspect of Eden’s business and is the driving force behind it. Everything we do centres on client needs and the fulfilment of their investment objectives.' Could I feel any worse? Eden's commitment is uncompromising. It's rubbing salt in the wound! Client needs?! Oh, everyone's concerned about clients and their absurd 'needs'! How wonderful! What about my needs? Doesn't anyone care about me?


No, I'm not going to Moorgate. Let them do what they want to do. Let Leigh Himsworth have his brief moment of glory. I have bigger fish to fry. But I won't eat them.