Thursday, 1 March 2012

This isn't what it is

Should I say: welcome! - ? Have you come to the wrong place? It's been known to happen. Maybe someone has been telling lies. You can't trust everyone - or anyone. Maybe a person thinks he (or she, women are evil, too) can have a laugh at your expense. I'm not sure what I would do in your situation. No, I am. Why don't you keep reading? Try to stay calm. Make sure no one is watching you. It'll soon be over. Unless you get a taste for it. Are you hungry? I have nothing for you.

I have some news for you: this isn't any sort of news on a financial blog. 'Tell me something I don’t know.' Okay. Well, not your usual blog, then. And it's not a short story. It's certainly not a poem. It wouldn't be a novel, would it? I refuse to live in the past. And it's not a play. I mean, the whole thing, here, the whole of it, is not. Clearly, it isn't reality. 'None that I've ever experienced.' And I'm not writing about anything. 'Ah, nothing.' But it's in your head now. I want to help you enjoy the emptiness, and get free, really free. However, you're not going to feel any better if you insist on something. Isn't it the case that you're your own worst enemy? Yes, I know you've suffered. You think I don't know? Artists have been entertaining you for years, and yet you're still not satisfied. They can't get rid of your body for you. They can't get rid of your mind. 'I always feel the same. It's always me, at the end.' And I understand that. You want more, don't you? (Or maybe less, of yourself.) It's an ache, a yearning. 'Er ...' I'm not saying I have the solution to your problem. But I will say that I'm the only artist in the world today who is looking for a solution and who is even aware that there is a problem in the first place. 'Mummy, I'm scared. Why am I here?' I'm not your mother! Christ! This is your destiny. We all have a destiny. So get involved! I know what I've got to do. Actually, we've made quite a decent start. I know you need my nothing - in your heart, and right in your soul, not just in your head. Well, you have it. You have it! And that will do for now. Remember, I'm working for you, for your extermination. I have no intention of letting you down.

'I understand, Mr Fowke, but I'm not really feeling it.' It's in your soul, and you're not feeling it?! I suppose the nothing has to become real. It's still a mere concept for you, isn't it? Oh, if the nothing was real, that would be the solution, I'm sure.

Is it anything for me? Unreal concept? I'm losing my way. If I have no idea where I am, no one will follow me. This is going to take a lot of work, a hell of a lot. Damn! Any sensible writer would give up, admit defeat. 'You're not exactly sensible, are you?' It's true, no one's ever accused me of being that.

It's magic I'm after. I want nothing to lift me up, and out. If only I could make you believe in the possibility of it, you know? What a great achievement it would be for all of us! 'Just believing?' Yes, reader(s). If you can believe in the possibility of something, you're halfway there. I just hope we don't have to pay the ultimate price for the ultimate escape. 'But that's entertainment!' I fear you may be right.