Friday, 4 April 2008

Luqman Arnold: bad karma?

There's a character by the name of Luqman Arnold. He used to be the chief executive of UBS (he was forced out in 2001), he recently led a failed bid for Northern Rock, and he is now launching some crazy-ass activist campaign against UBS. He wants to break it up! But I'm wondering about his karma. He's had a lot of bad luck, hasn't he?

I have been speaking to award-winning financial psychic Keith Busby, and he said, 'Bad luck? Bad karma? Jesus H. Christ! What did this poor guy do in a former life to deserve all this? Forced out of UBS? Failed bid for Northern Rock? Fuck me! And now he's causing trouble again, hanging around UBS like a bad smell. If only he would contact me and ask for my help, maybe I could do something to clear out all this bad karma. And let's be honest here, it's appalling karma. Horrible, horrible, horrible.'

I think pride might be the problem. An ex-chief executive of a major investment bank will not want to go crawling to my mate Keith. Award-winning financial psychic he may be, but a lot of people consider him no more important than the sort of prat you deal with at the end of a pier. That's not my opinion, you understand. But that's how some people look at it.