Thursday, 31 January 2019

Fidelity is merging some funds

Yes, dear reader(s). Fidelity is merging its multi asset fund range with its multi asset open range. So, uh ... I don't know what's going on. 'It all sounds the same to me, boss. Except some funds are open and some funds aren't. Shut, I suppose.' Yes, well, they will all be together now, Voice. Soon, anyway. By March.

Bill McQuaker will be charge of the whole lot. Apparently, he already manages the multi asset open range. 'Boss.' What? 'Why do you take the capital letters off?' What do you mean? 'It should be Multi Asset Open.' Uh. Who says it should?! Listen, I don't like using CAPITALS, man, when they're not necessary. Every PR email I get these days is stuffed with them, and I let the capitals go most of the time. However, this is news that I found for myself earlier and ... I WILL NOT USE CAPITALS for things like multi asset open, you dig? 'Yes, I dig.' Good!

Now, who on earth is this Bill McQuaker character? I have a feeling deep inside, Voice, that my readers need to know. They really need to know.

Okay, okay. Our Bill was born in Girvan in 1963. [That's in Scotland, I should imagine.] He attended the University of Edinburgh. He got himself an honours degree in business studies. He started his career with County Natwest IM in 1986, and then moved to NatWest Securities. Then he went to Credit Suisse. Then he joined Henderson, for his sins. And, uh ... now he's at Fidelity, of course. Working hard! / When he's not in the office, Bill enjoys the outdoor life with golf, tennis, football, and walking. He likes music, too.

Are you satisfied with that, dear reader(s)? No, I thought not. / Listen, kook(s), I know for a fact that our Bill enjoys the astral life, especially at night. 'No, no, no, boss.' Eh? 'No, no, no. You've banned financial workers from the astral plane. Or have you?' It's complicated, Voice. I banned them because they were doing too much business on the astral plane, and lowering the tone of the place. Then I allowed them to go back, for recreational purposes, like. 'Oh. Then didn't you ban that as well?' Ha! I honestly can't remember. It was years ago, man. 'Okay.' All I'm saying is, Bill isn't being completely open with his interests. He obviously doesn't want his colleagues and clients knowing that he floats around on the astral plane at night. In his own time, remember. I don't see anything wrong with it, myself.


Anything else? Not at the moment, no. I'll be doing the last post of the week this afternoon.

Oh, er ... I tried recording my songs again last night. Bloody nightmare! I don't want to talk about it.

Well ... later(s), alligator(s)!