Monday 12 July 2010

Prime Fund Solutions has launched PFS Horizon

Yes, it has. And I think we should all be concerned.

O Master, what's the problem? PFS Horizon is a service platform for fund of hedge funds managers. It offers them a front, middle, and back office service, that's all. There is nothing to worry about.

O my child, it does not offer financial shamanism. It does not offer burning love. It does not offer the wisdom of the ancients. It -

Oh, I understand. Yes, that is a problem. What can be done about it?

We need to take the chief executive of Prime Fund Solutions, Erik Jens, and we need to make him understand. I suggest we remove him from the earth, for a short while, and cast him off into outer space where his cold body will be heated up by the sun and will expand until everyone at Prime Fund Solutions can see his new form floating above with gigantic eyes staring down at them from the night sky. Then they will learn. Not just Erik. They will all learn that there is more to life than full transaction-based custody portfolios and investment management systems.

Yes. Good idea. That will work.