Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Malika Gulabani has finally taken over from Paul Grice at F&C

Apparently, she's the lead manager now, right now, on this cold earth, of F&C's Global Bond fund. There's only one thing to say: well done, Malika!

Yes, well done, Malika! Obviously, there's more to say. You've worked hard for this. And you've got the fire. Let Paul Grice enjoy his retirement or whatever the hell he thinks he's going to be doing, other opportunities, ha, broken and alone, cut off from the Global Bond fund, oh shame, really don't fancy his new life (yeah, sure) whatever the lower level he imagines it will be. You just concentrate on business, Malika. This is only the start. I've got a good feeling about you. You get me excited. And I shouldn't be getting excited. I was looking for a calmer prose style and then I found a woman like you. Life isn't predictable. Who could have predicted that I would start the day off with a bunch of lame-o links? No one, because I'm just not the sort. Don't go looking for it. I've deleted that post. It's gone!

Maybe it's the name. I used to know a French Algerian woman/girl/bird/sex object. (I'm a disgrace! This is what goes on in a man's head. Don't let them pull the wool over your eyes, ladies. They're all the same. Almost. I can't speak for the Guardian readers, those slags!) Actually, I've known two. But this one was called Malika. She was pretty hot. They both were. But it's no good dwelling on the past. I used to know loads of women/men/people in the past. It's the future I should be focusing on. All the wonderful people of the future, all the children, the flowers and the sunshine, and a lot more money than sense. That's what's coming. I've seen it. It's not going to be sensible. It's going to be wild. Feverish, hopefully. With blood and fire! Oh, it's always blood and fire. Some things you can predict. I think we'll throw a bit of strength and honour into the mix as well.

Right, Mikey, calm down. Take a deep breath. This is not what I wanted. Yes, I have been making progress, but, well ... I'll have to try again this afternoon, or even later - in the night! Reader(s), bear with me. It was the name, you see. It took me in the wrong direction. If you take risks the way I do, this sort of thing is going to happen. No regrets. Better this than bland death, eh?