I can't get an internet connection on that stupid dongle thing

[I'll post this when I can.]

Do you want to get ahead in business, dear reader(s)? Well, here's an idea you might want to consider. Start up a mobile phone company. Offer a service. Charge for that service. But do not provide that service. Apparently, it's totally legal.

I suppose I should be positive about the situation. This means I don't have to look at any financial news. 'It's an ill wind, Mikey, that ...' Er, yeah ... whatever.

Stefan Krause says hedge funds are getting all the talent

Stefan Krause is the chief financial officer at Deutsche Bank, and he reckons all the talent is moving to hedge funds. (Well, not all of it. I'm not going to a hedge fund. After lunch, I've got that lyric to write. I'm really excited. This new one will be a crooner's torch song. I can see Tony Bennett recording it, seriously. 'Fuck off, Mikey!' I'm serious, Voice.) / So, bankers don't want to work in banks no more. It's all the stupid regulations, ain't it? 'And the bonus limits.' Oh, and the bonus limits. There's no future in banking for the ambitious. 'Or the greedy.' That's a bit harsh, Voice. 'I'm only saying it the way I see it, man.' You commie son of a bitch!

_________________________

Anyway, radio silence on the music front for a while. I'm getting very close, reader(s). It'll only be a few weeks now. I should have been in this position a year ago, but ... well, I've been committed to getting three great songs for my demo. These things take time. / Jimmy Webb has only written three truly great songs in his whole career: By The Time I Get To Phoenix, Wichita Lineman, and Galveston. So ...

It's a nice sunny day. Maybe I'll go out after lunch, and then work on the lyric tonight. I've got to do a few hours guitar practice as well.

God knows what kind of summer we're going to get. / I probably won't go to Cornwall, unless my ship comes in ... you never know. I'm feeling positive. I'm pretty sure it won't be the Titanic.

Sunshine through the window. This is what I'm talking about!

Lunch? Cheese sandwich, yoghurt and that. Nothing out of the ordinary.

Dinner? Veggie burger tonight.

_________________________

By the time I get to Phoenix she'll be rising

She'll find the note I left hangin' on her door

She'll laugh when she reads the part that says I'm leavin'

'Cause I've left that girl so many times before ...

[No. 116] Picasso was right about the sun being a thousand rays in my belly

"All you have is yourself. All the rest is nothing."

And it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[1], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[1], and it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[2], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[1], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[2], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[1], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[2], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[1], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[2], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[1], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[2], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[1], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[2], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![1], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[2], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[1], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![2], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[1], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[2], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[1], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[2], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[1], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[2], and it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[3], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[2], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[3], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[3], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[3], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[3], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[3], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[3], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![3], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[3], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[3], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[3], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[3], and

And it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[1], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[1], and it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[2], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[1], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[2], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[1], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[2], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[1], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[2], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[1], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[2], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[1], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[2], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![1], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[2], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[1], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![2], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[1], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[2], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[1], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[2], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[1], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[2], and it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[3], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[2], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[3], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[3], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[3], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[3], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[3], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[3], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![3], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[3], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[3], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[3], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[3], and

And it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[1], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[1], and it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[2], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[1], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[2], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[1], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[2], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[1], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[2], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[1], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[2], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[1], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[2], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![1], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[2], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[1], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![2], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[1], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[2], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[1], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[2], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[1], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[2], and it's a lonely business: the life of a wild burning belly, and so many bellies are merely lifeless rocks[3], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[2], and what can put out the fire? ... Oh, nothing ... well, they are nothing[3], and what can match the light? ... Oh, darkness, they ... are the darkness[3], and it's burning the way I need it to BECAUSE I can't be a fool - for the satisfaction of fools[3], and the moon may look cool and pretty at night ... BUT(!): it's as dead as some people's souls[3], and who can touch me? ... Yeah(!) ... rolling, rolling, rolling ... to my DESTINY[3], and who can speak to me? ... Hey(!) ... only Picasso, my soulmate ... a savage artist on a mission for all of eternity, all of it[3], and there are others who will say literally ANYTHING!!![3], and I've had it with all sorts, words, little action ... and I can confirm: I am sick of it[3], and so where am I, in life, and what is left, for me?[3], and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ... and work, work, work ...[3], and it's a kind of happiness, er, I've been told, or I read it somewhere[3], and

Alastair Gunn is taking over from Anthony Nutt at Jupiter

Yes, I know I've been writing about Jupiter Asset Management a lot lately, but so many exciting things have been happening at the firm. 'Really, Mikey?' No, not really, Voice. 'Oh.' What else am I supposed to write about?

Obviously, I pray for the fucking day when I won't have to write about finance at all. 'You're a dreamer, boy.' No I'm not. I wrote the chorus lyrics for my new song yesterday, and I have the concept for it now. 'Is it going to be a smash?' Wait and see, Voice.

But, anyway, this, er, Alastair Gunn character. He's taking over the Jupiter High Income fund from our Tony. Mr Gunn has twenty-seven years experience, believe it or not. There's some talk within the firm that they may rename the fund The Alastair Gunn Experience. Not a bad idea. It would make it seem a bit more sexy, I suppose.

Tony, as you already know, dear reader(s), is calling it a day. Yeah, he's getting out of the game for good. Lucky sod.

I mean, what a jammy git! Just as it's all falling apart - the world of finance, going down. Only the losers will be left behind, scrabbling around for a few pennies.

_________________________

This could be controversial, but I'm thinking that R.E.M. might be the greatest group after The Beatles. 'What?!' / The Stone Roses are cooler than R.E.M., and Radiohead are more experimental - maybe too experimental - but I think R.E.M. have a great imaginative power that puts them second only to The Beatles. / The Rolling Stones aren't artistic enough. Pink Floyd too boring. Led Zeppelin not subtle enough, too overblown. Nirvana, too harsh. The Doors are one of my favourites, but that doesn't mean anything. / And U2? No, not for me. Though they have great songs.

And I've only just started listening to R.E.M. I haven't heard most of their stuff.

Lunch!

[No. 115] It's easy to have no idea of what's coming

But you're not here for that, are you?

And it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[1], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[1], and it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[2], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[1], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[2], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[1], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[2], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[1], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[2], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[1], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[2], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[1], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[2], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[1], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[2], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[1], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[2], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[1], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[2], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[1], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[2], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[1], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[2], and it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[3], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[2], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[3], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[3], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[3], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[3], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[3], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[3], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[3], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[3], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[3], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[3], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[3], and

And it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[1], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[1], and it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[2], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[1], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[2], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[1], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[2], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[1], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[2], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[1], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[2], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[1], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[2], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[1], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[2], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[1], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[2], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[1], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[2], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[1], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[2], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[1], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[2], and it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[3], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[2], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[3], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[3], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[3], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[3], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[3], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[3], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[3], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[3], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[3], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[3], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[3], and

And it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[1], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[1], and it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[2], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[1], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[2], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[1], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[2], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[1], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[2], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[1], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[2], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[1], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[2], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[1], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[2], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[1], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[2], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[1], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[2], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[1], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[2], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[1], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[2], and it's an easy thing, such an easy thing, to shut your mind off and hide in the darkness[3], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[2], and I wouldn't want to be the others, frightened, wondering, watching their backs[3], and it's amazing some of the stuff that people think exists in today's reality or stuff that is around the corner[3], and you've got to take every opportunity that arises because life is passing us by, man[3], and I'm hanging on every word that the cosmos is whispering into my ear[3], and it's so easy to be negative, oh, and then fall down, down, down into the dirt[3], and I'm open for all of it - like you wouldn't believe; and what are you waiting for?[3], and what are you dreaming of, in the night, or, more importantly, in the day?[3], and it's all going to be blue sky, white fluffy clouds, and unbelievable sun ... just you wait and see[3], and if you have one hundred per cent faith in God, you're doing better than most people[3], and all you've got to do is let go, let go, let go ... of the demons and the horrors[3], and I'll tell you what's hard to do ... some of these days ...[3], and

What's this HSBC "demising" crap?

Is HSBC sacking people or what? Demising? What the fuck is that?! 'Mikey, the bank is letting hundreds of people go. Hundreds!' Go where, Voice? 'Nowhere in particular, man. Just ...' / This is strange. Demise? I've never heard of anyone being demised before. I've heard of people being disappeared. 'Is it as bad as that?' Let's hope not.

The person at HSBC who thought of this should be demised. 'That would be something to see!' It's bound to be someone in HR. I'll do it myself. 'Apparently, a lot of HSBC's employees are going to be "impacted" as well.' Impacted?! THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!!! 'Calm down, Mikey.' Voice, it's the evil that men do. That's what this is. And women, too. I'm disgusted!

_________________________

Thank God I've got a nice cheese sandwich for lunch. It'll help me put those demonic HSBC human resources goons out of my mind. Crisps, yoghurt, and a can of Coke.

I'll be working on a conceptual later, No. 115, and squeezing in some guitar practice when I can.

I still need one more lyric, then I'll change my life - for good. I'm in a state of certainty. You better believe it, baby.

I've decided the tune I wrote last week is the best I've ever done. The verses and chorus and bridge are very melodic and fit together perfectly. And it's the first bridge I've ever composed, by the way. / The songs I wrote when I was a kid had crazy structures, but no bridges. I'm not actually a big fan of them, bridges, but the bridge works well in this song.

I'm listening to R.E.M. / Losing My Religion shows what you can achieve with one great song. As they say in their Best Of album notes, it took them from cult band to one of the biggest bands in the world.

Laters, blog fan(s).

Jupiter's Merlin team hates equities

I don't know what's going on. I don't even know what this Merlin team is. It sounds ridiculous, anyway. Who gives a shit about Merlin? The guy is overrated. He's had his day, and that was fucking centuries ago. / It will come as no surprise to anyone that John Chatfeild-Roberts is leading the team. Jesus Christ! Who is he? / Anyway, it's a multi-manager thing, this Merlin nonsense; and even though the team hates equities it is increasing its exposure to them because of inflation or something. Equities are better than bonds.

I'd say they're right about inflation, the team. Yeah. / I mean, it is much higher than the "authorities" will have you believe. Whoever the "authorities" are. / Er ... 'The government, Mikey?' What? Er, yes, I suppose, Voice. Uh ... I don't know what's going on, who's involved. Ha! I'm in the dark, you know? And that's the way I like it, actually. Once you start knowing stuff you can become boring, like those twats. 'What twats?' That blog. 'Oh yeah. The wankers. Slags.' I can't even read that shit any more, man. Life's too short. 'All you -' All I want to do, Voice, is play my guitar. 'Yeah.' That's the future for me, rock and roll. I'm sick of all the crap. 'You're up to your neck in burning love, man.' The burning love is all right. I ain't got a problem with the burning love. It's just the mundane finance rubbish that is getting me down.

It should be the Michael Fowke team. Now that would be classy. Named after the greatest financial shaman the world has ever known. / Fuck Merlin! He's a ponce.

_________________________

I played my guitar for three hours yesterday. / I'm gutted I didn't buy this Yamaha acoustic a couple of years ago. I considered it, but decided to go with the cheap Argos piece of shit instead. / I guess I wasn't sure about my "comeback". Though I was never "there" all that much. 'Eh? What? Where, Mikey?' Forget it. Never mind.

It's a nice sunny day. I might go out after lunch. / Cheese and onion, today. The sandwich. But no crisps.

I'm listening to a new 90s compilation, seriously. There are some very good songs on it. Music has only become "dodgy" in the last six or seven years. The lovely Amy Winehouse's Back To Black album was the last great moment. Just my personal view, of course.

Right, laters.

I've discovered a cure for migraine

Normally when I get a migraine I take a couple of Anadin Extra(s?) and carry on with my day. The problem is though, the pills often don't work. I have to take more of them a few hours later, and then I start to feel even worse. The pain can last for a couple of days. However, if I take the pills just before going to sleep at night I wake up in the morning with a clear head. / Well, this morning (around seven) I woke up with a migraine that felt like a goddamn brain tumour. So what did I do? 'What did you do, Mikey?' I took two Anadin and went back to sleep for an hour and a half. 'Yeah?' Oh yeah. And when I woke up, the migraine was gone. 'Wow!' So that's the cure. 'Brilliant!' Take painkillers and then go to sleep straight away for a couple of hours - at any time of the day. 'You don't have to wait until bedtime, man?' No, Voice. Sleep and pills, any time of the day. It works for me.

_________________________

That's it for today. / Hedge funds? Banks? Oh, tomorrow! And tomorrow, and tomorrow.

I'm going to play my guitar for the rest of the day. Man, I love my new guitar. It has such a beautiful sound and feel, and I haven't even put the good strings on yet.

Twenty years ago I bought an Aria acoustic for £300. (Probably five to six hundred now.) This Yamaha cost me £120, and I think it's a better guitar.

By the way, I've put the finishing touches to last week's new tune. I just need lyrics for it now.

I'm motivated like a motherfucker at the moment, excuse my French. [I'm sure Miles Davis spoke like that.]

[No. 114] Magic Bus Capital

You want it, you want it, you want it ...

And I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[1], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[1], and I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[2], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[1], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[2], and this is the WAY[1], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[2], and you can drive to your baby[1], and this is the WAY[2], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[1], and you can drive to your baby[2], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[1], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[2], and you can be FREE[1], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[2], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[1], and you can be FREE[2], and you can be more than THREE[1], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[2], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![1], and you can be more than THREE[2], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[1], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![2], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[1], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[2], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[1], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[2], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![1], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[2], and I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[3], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![2], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[3], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[3], and this is the WAY[3], and you can drive to your baby[3], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[3], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[3], and you can be FREE[3], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[3], and you can be more than THREE[3], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![3], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[3], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[3], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[3], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![3], and

And I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[1], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[1], and I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[2], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[1], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[2], and this is the WAY[1], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[2], and you can drive to your baby[1], and this is the WAY[2], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[1], and you can drive to your baby[2], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[1], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[2], and you can be FREE[1], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[2], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[1], and you can be FREE[2], and you can be more than THREE[1], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[2], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![1], and you can be more than THREE[2], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[1], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![2], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[1], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[2], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[1], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[2], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![1], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[2], and I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[3], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![2], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[3], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[3], and this is the WAY[3], and you can drive to your baby[3], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[3], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[3], and you can be FREE[3], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[3], and you can be more than THREE[3], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![3], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[3], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[3], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[3], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![3], and

And I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[1], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[1], and I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[2], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[1], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[2], and this is the WAY[1], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[2], and you can drive to your baby[1], and this is the WAY[2], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[1], and you can drive to your baby[2], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[1], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[2], and you can be FREE[1], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[2], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[1], and you can be FREE[2], and you can be more than THREE[1], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[2], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![1], and you can be more than THREE[2], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[1], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![2], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[1], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[2], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[1], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[2], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![1], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[2], and I know you don't want to cause no FUSS[3], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![2], and you can invest in the MAGIC BUS[3], and I know you don't care how much you'll have to pay[3], and this is the WAY[3], and you can drive to your baby[3], and YEAH(!) you can drive a-ROUND ...[3], and you can sit and smile ... on the MAGIC BUS[3], and you can be FREE[3], and you can get a-ROUND ... even better when it's magic[3], and you can be more than THREE[3], and you can get a-ROUND with your baby - today![3], and you don't want the 5:15 to NOWHERE - no, you don't want it, you don't want it, you don't want ... it[3], and your destiny is only another SPIN a-WAY[3], and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want it, and YOU(!) want ... it[3], and ... oh, the MAGIC BUS!!![3], and

The 5:15 Capital hedge fund is closing down

Yes, the 5:15 Capital hedge fund is on time for oblivion. No, it's not a train. It's a song. 'A what, Mikey?!' Not a what, Voice. A who. 'What?' It's a song by The Who. 'What is?' 5:15. 'Eh?' Don't worry about it. All you need to know is that E.G. Fisher and Rob Wahl are returning money to investors. 'Who?' Fisher and Wahl. They're the founders of the hedge fund. 'Oh, right. And where does Keith Moon come into it?' He plays the drums, on the astral plane somewhere. 'But you've banned all that, the astral plane!' Only for finance types, Voice. I can't stop drummers drumming, and I wouldn't want to. 'It's all very confusing, Mikey.' No it's not. But I will say, it's a poor song. "Out of my brain on the 5:15." Well ... 'They should have called their fund Magic Bus Capital.' Yeah, that would have been better. "I don't want to cause no fuss, but can I invest in your magic bus?" Ha! 'Is that the lyric, man?' No.

Acton, the home of rock and roll.

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I wrote a new tune last night. It's early days yet, but it might be good enough for the third song on my demo. It certainly has potential.

I'm playing the guitar now for at least two hours a day on busy blogging days, and even more at other times - three or four hours. It should make me more creative, musically. Inspiration doesn't just happen. You've got to be active.

Lunch? No surprises. Cheese sandwich, crisps, yoghurt, Coke. / I ain't going to no fancy restaurant. I'm staying home, having fun as usual.

[No. 113] There's no end to getting a-ROUND

You better believe it, baby.

And if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[1], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[1], and if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[2], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[1], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[2], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[1], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[2], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[1], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[2], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[1], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[2], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![1], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[2], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![1], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![2], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[1], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![2], and if you're shaking ... ha![1], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[2], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![1], and if you're shaking ... ha![2], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![1], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![2], and who ... are you?[1], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![2], and what ... are you?[1], and who ... are you?[2], and if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[3], and what ... are you?[2], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[3], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[3], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[3], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[3], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[3], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![3], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![3], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[3], and if you're shaking ... ha![3], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![3], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![3], and who ... are you?[3], and what ... are you?[3], and

And if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[1], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[1], and if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[2], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[1], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[2], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[1], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[2], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[1], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[2], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[1], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[2], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![1], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[2], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![1], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![2], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[1], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![2], and if you're shaking ... ha![1], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[2], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![1], and if you're shaking ... ha![2], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![1], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![2], and who ... are you?[1], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![2], and what ... are you?[1], and who ... are you?[2], and if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[3], and what ... are you?[2], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[3], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[3], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[3], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[3], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[3], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![3], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![3], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[3], and if you're shaking ... ha![3], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![3], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![3], and who ... are you?[3], and what ... are you?[3], and

And if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[1], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[1], and if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[2], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[1], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[2], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[1], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[2], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[1], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[2], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[1], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[2], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![1], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[2], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![1], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![2], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[1], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![2], and if you're shaking ... ha![1], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[2], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![1], and if you're shaking ... ha![2], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![1], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![2], and who ... are you?[1], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![2], and what ... are you?[1], and who ... are you?[2], and if you've got a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, man, you can get a-ROUND forever[3], and what ... are you?[2], and you want, you want, you WANT ... to be a-ROUND ... FOREVER, don't you?[3], and if you're a DREAMER and happy to be DIZZY ... you've come to the right place, my friend[3], and we're gonna have a GOOD TIME[3], and I wouldn't lie to you, oh no, not when you're desperate for some kind of SALVATION: it's in your eyes, child[3], and I ain't got no Bible, and I ain't got no rules for you BUT you(!) gotta get a-ROUND - yeah?[3], and DIZZY ah DIZZY, we can be so(OOO) DIZZY!!![3], and SHAKE it, BABY!!![3], and if you're feeling EMPTY, you're doing all right, all right - all right?[3], and if you're shaking ... ha![3], and if you're crying ... well, I ... I know you don't want it to stop, so COME ON![3], and some people ... are never happy to be DIZZY, and look at them: they just want to suck on the DIRT!!![3], and who ... are you?[3], and what ... are you?[3], and

James Clunie is joining Jupiter Asset Management

Dear oh dear. / Well, I, er ... I just really hope he knows what he thinks he's doing, for his sake, not mine - though I'll have to write about him again if it all goes wrong, which it will. / You see, Mr Clunie is leaving Scottish Weirdos to join Jupiter, not yet, but in July, when it's hot, but it's always hot, at Jupiter, because they've got the burning love, which no one has told Jamie about, I'm sure.

I don't know how he'll cope. Yes, Jamie has this PhD of his. Indirect short-selling constraints or some nonsense. 'Oh, that's nice.' But he's not a financial shaman, is he? He hasn't been to the University of Life and Death. 'Not many have, Mikey.' He hasn't been touched in the desert by a shadowy figure. 'Well ...' Shut up, Voice, I'm thinking, man. / He can't leave. I'm thinking I'll have to step in. 'Eh?' I've got ten weeks, roughly, to put a stop to this. Who do I know at Scottish Weirdos? 'No one.' You're right. I don't know anyone. Shit!

I'll have to speak to one of my mates at Jupiter. Simple Simon, maybe. Or Cedric. 'What are you going to say?' I don't know. Just ... it's going to be a nightmare training Jamie up. He won't be able to hit the ground running with this total return and equity long-short thing they've got in mind for him. 'Surely, he has some experience from working with the strange ones?' No, Voice. As strange, as weird, as they are, they don't know shit about mystical capitalism.

I'll sort it, don't worry, Voice, reader(s). / But I should be concentrating on my music. I haven't got the time or the energy to be writing this blog, dealing with finance nutjobs, and writing songs. I'm only human. 'I thought you were superhuman?' Yeah, I wish.

I played my guitar for three hours yesterday. And I'll do a couple of hours today, though I'll be working on another conceptual as well, No. 113. 'How many more of those posts are you going to write, man?' As many as it takes. 'For what?!' Mind your own business.

Lunch? Egg sandwich, cheese and onion crisps, strawberry yoghurt, a can of Coke. / Laters.

Yip Ka-hay is in a bright stream ... of capital management

Or something like that. Oh. / He has this Bright Stream hedge fund, I suppose. In Hong Kong, no doubt, like a mild-mannered janitor, with $25 million of his own money. Yes, his own money! We really should take our hats off to Yip for using his own money. Too many of these hedge fund managers sponge off other people. It's disgraceful. / I don't think it has been launched yet. We'll have to wait until July, yes. Well, I don't mind. I don't mind waiting. Some things are worth waiting for. And some aren't, obviously. / Unfortunately, Bright Stream is a macro thing. Never mind. We won't hold it against Yip. / Bright Stream will be trading currencies, interest-rate securities, and equity indices. Oh, that sounds all right, don't it? / At some point, Yip will be getting his hands on other people's money. Yeah. He's hoping for $300 million! Ha! We can all hope, son. But I wish you the best of luck, Yip, if you're reading this. / Billy Fong's mixed up in it, of course. Those two are inseparable!

Yip's been away for four years. 'What?!' God knows what he's been doing since leaving SAC Capital Advisors in 2009. Er ... it's possible he's been managing his own investments. I mean, he looks the type. I haven't actually seen him. But if I could see him ... he would look the type, I'm pretty sure of that. Yes.

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It's all right for some. I wish I could get away for four years. I'm stuck here, with this. / One day, I'll get away, for good.

I played my new guitar for four hours yesterday. So ... I got away for four hours. It's amazing how much progress you can make in such a short space of time. / I may have to use my old guitar for recording though because it's louder. But I haven't put the Martin strings on the Yamaha yet. That might improve things.

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No, Yip wasn't away, not if he was managing his own investments. / Christ! What's wrong with these people?

I probably won't go to Cornwall this year. (Money is tight. We can't all be like Yip.) I might take a week off for some intense guitar shit. I don't know. / I only need one more song for my demo.

Please bear in mind, when these three songs are finally finished they'll be the sort of songs most songwriters would be lucky to get in their whole careers. I ain't fucking around. You know me, dear reader(s). I don't fuck around, do I?

Well, a-ROUND, but ... you know what I mean.

I've got a cheese sandwich again. / Laters.

Paulson Partners Premium will ... do away with income taxes - ?!

Oh, what?! What is John Paulson up to now? 'He's crazy, man.' Mr Paulson is launching a new hedge fund, some crazy-ass Paulson Partners Premium shit, right? 'Yeah, Mikey. And what about the taxes?' Voice, his clients won't have to pay any goddamn taxes! Never! 'Never again?!' No. 'That's crazy, man.' You're telling me.

How it's all going to work out though, nobody knows. It's a big secret. Well, for the time being. But next week, NEXT WEEK, Mr Paulson is going to be giving a lecture at his offices and all will be revealed. 'Is he still moving to Puerto Rico, Mikey?' He doesn't have to now, does he? Not with this revolutionary tax-free hedge fund. 'Christ! These are exciting times we're living in, man.' Tell me about it.

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I've got a new guitar! A Yamaha acoustic. It's a beautiful thing, really. Not as loud as my old one, but better in every other way. It's made me more enthusiastic about practicing.

There's bad news, however. My latest recording of My Heart is too rough and a bit irregular in its pace. So I will have to do it again. Never mind. It will sound better on the new guitar anyway. At least I have an arrangement for the song that works now. / It doesn't matter that I've recorded it five hundred times. Wax on, wax off, yeah?

I'll need to get a keyboard soon. I've seen a good Yamaha one at a reasonable price.

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Lunch? Just a cheese sandwich with some onion in it. Nothing to get excited about. I'm having a strawberry yoghurt as well.

[No. 112] We're all a bit confused because of the way the world is

Look at yourself, yes, YOU, yourself.

And we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[1], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[1], and we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[2], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[1], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[2], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[1], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[2], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[1], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[2], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[1], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[2], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[1], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[2], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[1], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[2], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[1], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[2], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[1], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[2], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[1], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[2], and we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[3], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[2], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[3], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[3], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[3], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[3], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[3], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[3], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[3], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[3], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[3], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[3], and

And we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[1], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[1], and we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[2], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[1], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[2], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[1], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[2], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[1], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[2], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[1], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[2], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[1], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[2], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[1], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[2], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[1], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[2], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[1], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[2], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[1], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[2], and we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[3], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[2], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[3], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[3], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[3], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[3], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[3], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[3], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[3], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[3], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[3], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[3], and

And we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[1], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[1], and we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[2], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[1], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[2], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[1], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[2], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[1], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[2], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[1], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[2], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[1], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[2], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[1], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[2], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[1], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[2], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[1], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[2], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[1], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[2], and we shouldn't be too hard on the CRAZY boys and girls with STONE KILLER's money - oh, they're all right, and who are we to judge?[3], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[2], and LOOK at the WORLD, please[3], and ... got it ... sickening smoke in my head ... and I know YOU ... got it too, yeah ... and we ain't even drunk on death - just SPINNING a-ROUND(!)[3], and I got BLUES, and I'm looking for my guitar in the gloom to play it until my fingers bleed RED[3], and gimme a reason, stranger, you[3], and let's get a-ROUND here FASTER, man, like CHAOS is going out of style[3], and your SKULL is shining, and you ain't got no eyes, and that's the WAY I see ... you[3], and ... all got problems, shit, and I ain't judging NO ONE, son[3], and your SKIN is dirty, and you're in the GUTTER of MONEY, and you're crying, but so what?[3], and ... what's a good SOUL ... at a time like this?[3], and ... where's a good life ... I can approve of?[3], and

Charles Stanley has £17.6 billion!

Christ! Charles Stanley must be the richest man in the country. Or very near the top, anyway. And I've never even heard of him! Where did he get all this money from? And who is he?

A voice from nowhere says - 'Not me, Mikey!' Shut it, Voice! / It says: 

 

"Hi, I'm Charles Stanley and I pride myselves on our commitment to our clients. Providing a personal investment service is very much in the DNA of my whole body and it is this commitment that we believe makes Charles Stanley (me) stand out from the rest of those losers in the investment community. / We strive to provide the very best levels of personal service for all clients from discretionary, advisory and execution-only clients through to corporate clients, both large and small, plus charity and court of protection clients. We invest heavily in our bodily fluids and soul-systems and our rear consistently wins praise from clients for its nice shape. / We aim to maintain the highest standards, all of us, but even in the best-run bodies things sometimes go wrong. Often these issues are simple misunderstandings, but however trifling or serious they are, your broker (some others) should be able to resolve them for you. If this fails to satisfy you then please speak to me (or them) at our head. We are subject to the independent jurisdiction of the Financial Shamans thing and any complaint will be dealt with in accordance with its rules."

Right. He seems a bit confused, doesn't he? What's this Financial Shamans thing? I'm the world's foremost financial shaman and I've never heard of it. 'Mikey, you've never heard of Charles Stanley. There's something very strange about this.' You're telling me, man. How can a bizarre character like Mr Stanley come out of NOWHERE with a load of gobbledygook and be worth £17.6 billion?

[No. 111] I love the dough

More than you know.

And oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[1], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[1], and oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[2], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[1], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[2], and I love the DOUGH!!![1], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[2], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[1], and I love the DOUGH!!![2], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[1], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[2], and will I ever get enough?[1], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[2], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[1], and will I ever get enough?[2], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[1], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[2], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[1], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[2], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[1], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[2], and life is dough, and dough is life[1], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[2], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[1], and life is dough, and dough is life[2], and can you dig it?[1], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[2], and oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[3], and can you dig it?[2], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[3], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[3], and I love the DOUGH!!![3], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[3], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[3], and will I ever get enough?[3], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[3], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[3], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[3], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[3], and life is dough, and dough is life[3], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[3], and can you dig it?[3], and

And oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[1], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[1], and oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[2], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[1], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[2], and I love the DOUGH!!![1], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[2], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[1], and I love the DOUGH!!![2], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[1], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[2], and will I ever get enough?[1], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[2], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[1], and will I ever get enough?[2], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[1], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[2], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[1], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[2], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[1], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[2], and life is dough, and dough is life[1], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[2], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[1], and life is dough, and dough is life[2], and can you dig it?[1], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[2], and oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[3], and can you dig it?[2], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[3], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[3], and I love the DOUGH!!![3], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[3], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[3], and will I ever get enough?[3], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[3], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[3], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[3], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[3], and life is dough, and dough is life[3], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[3], and can you dig it?[3], and
 

And oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[1], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[1], and oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[2], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[1], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[2], and I love the DOUGH!!![1], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[2], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[1], and I love the DOUGH!!![2], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[1], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[2], and will I ever get enough?[1], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[2], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[1], and will I ever get enough?[2], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[1], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[2], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[1], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[2], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[1], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[2], and life is dough, and dough is life[1], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[2], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[1], and life is dough, and dough is life[2], and can you dig it?[1], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[2], and oh I love the dough ... a lot, oh YES(!), a lot more than anyone knows[3], and can you dig it?[2], and I like to play ... Monopoly with real cash[3], and I ain't gotta lotta dough BUT I still love it ... whenever I can get my dirty hands on it[3], and I love the DOUGH!!![3], and it's a HARD LIFE ... with no dough[3], and I'm heading for Malibu the moment I get enough[3], and will I ever get enough?[3], and maybe there's a pot of gold beyond the THREE ... so I better get a-ROUND[3], and FASTER(!) with a deeper groove[3], and I'm looking for more dough than I'll know what to do with[3], and with a deeper groove I'm digging down for dough, down into the HEART OF REALITY - eh?[3], and life is dough, and dough is life[3], and life in Malibu will be so nice, I'm sure[3], and can you dig it?[3], and