Monday, 20 May 2013

Greg Geiling is going to be managing a Blackstone super hedge fund!

Ain't that exciting?! / No, I don't know who Greg is. It doesn't really matter who he is. He's probably just another square. 'Mikey, Mr Geiling is a senior managing director of Blackstone, and the head of BAAM's special situations investing group.' BAAM?! What the fuck is BAAM, man? 'Beats me, son. But since joining Blackstone, Mr Geiling has been involved in sourcing and evaluating direct investment opportunities for the hedge fund solutions group. He is also involved in hedge fund manager evaluation, selection, and monitoring.' Anything else, Voice? 'He has a bullshit in finance?' A what in finance?! 'Er, some B.S. in finance.' That's a degree, man.

Yeah, this super hedge fund. Some guys have all the luck. I mean, it doesn't really matter who's managing it, not if it's as super as they say. / So, what makes it so super, even if it doesn't have a name yet? 'It hasn't even been launched yet.' Okay, what will make it so super? 'I don't know.' See if you can dig this, Voice: Greg is going to steal all the best ideas of other hedge fund managers. 'Oh, brilliant, Mikey! Standing on the shoulders of giants, eh?' Exactly. 'Seeing what these giants are getting up to, and then ripping the poor bastards off.' More or less. I think the giants are going to be compensated though. 'How? A few dollars in their pocket?' Well, I've heard that Greg is going to steal all their trading ideas, make a bloody fortune, and then treat the giants to a night out somewhere. The restaurant of their choice. 'That's nice.' I think so.


I've been reading Donnie Brasco's book about his time undercover in the Mafia. I mean, Joseph Pistone, the FBI agent. / I've read it before. I read it years ago before the film was made. It's a brilliant book. And it's just amazing how much gangsters have in common with bankers and hedgies. 'Yeah?' Oh yeah, Voice. They're only useful if they can kick money upstairs to the boss, or they get whacked. They're always thinking of the next scam. They're very aggressive. 'Gangsters have a code of honour though, don't they, Mikey?' Well, I suppose ...