Wednesday, 25 September 2013

Gareth Isaac has bought some asset backed securities in the UK

Or something. / I don't know what's going on. I have no idea why Gareth even wants to get involved in stuff like that. 'It's his job, man. He's got to put food on the table, ain't he?' What's his job? Remind me. 'He manages the Schroder Strategic Bond fund with Mr Jolly.' Mister who?! 'Mr Jolly.' Oh Christ. Let me get this straight, Voice. Maybe I'm a little fucked up this morning. Gareth Isaac is managing a fund with a character from a children's book?! Are you serious, man? 'Yes, Mikey.' But that's absolutely bizarre! / I've heard it all now.

No, hang on, you mean Bob Jolly, don't you? 'Well ... yes.' Right. I've written about him before. He's not a Mr Men character. Why didn't you say: "Bob Jolly"? 'I couldn't resist, boss.' / Listen, Voice. Don't take the piss out of these fund managers. I respect these people, and they respect me. That's why I can have a laugh with them. But who are you, eh? You're just some disembodied voice. They don't know you. You haven't built up a relationship with these people. 'Mikey, come on -' Listen to me, Voice. I don't like it, the way you carry on. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth, yeah? You're not big, and you're not clever. Bob Jolly is a veteran portfolio manager, son. He's the head of global macro strategy at Schroders. He has worked at UBS, and Gartmore. He's not a piece of shit like you. 'All right, boss, I'm sorry.' It's Mr Jolly you should be apologizing to. 'I'll pop over and see him later.' What, astral travel? 'Yeah.' Okay. Just make sure you do. And don't scare him. Introduce yourself properly. Don't jabber away in his head.


He's gone now, reader(s). I wasn't too hard on him, was I?