Tuesday, 6 June 2017

Does anyone want to celebrate the thirtieth anniversary of the debit card?

Christ! Yeah, uh ... 3rd June, dear reader(s), the other day. I missed it, unfortunately. Never mind, eh? 'Are you serious, boss?' Not me, Voice. But they are. 'Who?' ipagoo. 'Who?!' ipagoo.

Carlos Sanchez, CEO of ipagoo comments on the 30th anniversary of the debit card: "Debit cards have fundamentally changed consumer behaviour, altering the way people spend money. We have seen a steady evolution of the capabilities of debit cards over the last 30 years aimed at making payments easier. For example, contactless debit cards now account for 69% of debit cards in issue. Through this evolution debit cards have made a major contribution to economic growth especially through ecommerce. However, it is imperative for debit card providers to continue offering innovative payments solutions so consumers can make the most of the burgeoning digital economy."

PR email, you see. Emma sent it. 'Who?' Emma. 'Who are all these people, boss? Do you actually know any of them?' Listen, they send me this stuff, man. I don't have any complaints. And I don't have to "know" them, do I? It ain't personal, it's business.

"We believe innovation and modernization is key. 'Non banks' such as ipagoo that create new banking models and disrupt the market are the future - and ipagoo has a key role to play in democratizing the banking landscape and offering competitive products as identified by both Deloitte and Barclays in recent reports. We have continued to modernize what debit cards offer customers and have created the next stage of evolution. Living as global citizens in the modern world means people regularly need quick and easy access to a number of different currencies. With ipagoo people can use one debit card to access multiple accounts and pay in multiple currencies."

Oh, right. Our Carlos is just using it as an opportunity to promote ipagoo. 'Ha! Typical!' Well, no, that's fair enough. Promotion makes the world go round. There's no harm in it. 'Yeah, but he was pretending to care about the debit card, boss. "Oh, I love the debit card, and it's colourful history." Bullshit! He don't care, man. It's just business to him.' So?! 'Well, consider the feelings of the poor debit card.' What on earth are you going on about, Voice? Please, just shut up.

Sanchez continues: "What we have also seen with card payments over the last 30 years is the growth of sophisticated frauds and attempted fraud, particularly fraud that exploits card not present transactions common with online shopping. As providers innovate they need to ensure their anti-fraud and security systems modernize with them. We have processes in place that allow card users to automatically accept transactions from trusted retailers but ask for approval for purchases from retailers that have not been pre-approved. Most fraudsters start by trying to make unexpected small purchases. However small the amount we still require the account holder's approval to allow money to leave the account to go to a retailer that hasn't been pre-approved."

Okay, okay. That's enough. We get the point, Carlos, mate. 'Ha! I knew your patience would wear thin.' Shut up!


Anything else, dear reader(s)? Not really. I mean, not much. Bloody awful day. All the rain. Is this supposed to be summer? It's a joke! 'I feel sorry for the Aviva Investors mob, boss. In the park, like.' They'll be in the pub, silly.