Thursday 14 May 2015

Morgan Stanley has been fined $2 million

For what?! For what?! / Calm down, reader(s), it's not the end of the world. Morgan Stanley forgot to report its short-selling positions. Or did it incorrectly, over six years. I don't know. Big deal! It doesn't matter. $2 million ain't nothing, anyway. Chump change.

That's the beautiful thing about being rich. You don't care if people fine you. Or steal from you. Or drink all your champagne. There's enough for everyone!

The songwriter Lionel Bart used to throw parties at his mansion in Chelsea, and guests could take a fistful of twenty and fifty pound notes that were kept in a large urn near the front door. Lionel didn't care. He was making more money than The Beatles in the Sixties.

Er ... then he lost it all. Ended up living above a chip shop in Acton. / He also had a castle in Morocco, you know. 'While he was living in Acton?!' No, in the Sixties, you moron!

That won't happen to me. I'm going to be a tight bastard. I'm sorry, but I've had a hard life. If I ever make it to Malibu, I'll be looking after number one.