Thursday 28 May 2015

Randy Billhardt is at JMP Securities now!

Great news! Managing director in the equity capital markets division. Nice! And oh Randy Billhardt is quite a guy, let me tell you. I mean, this man can lift a boulder with just one hand! 'Amazing, boss!' Yes, Voice. Randy is so inspiring. In fact, I'm going to do a conceptual on him, a number on him. 'No. 320?' Yeah, No. 320! Why not? You only live once. 'Er ... how do you know he can lift a boulder with only one hand, man?' Because, my little invisible friend, I have the proof. There is a picture of Randy on his LinkedIn profile. One hand, one boulder. 'Wow!' It's unbelievable, ain't it? Randy Billhardt: superman!

Oh, er ... dear reader(s), our Randy is over in America, New York, yeah? 'Ha!' Well, uh ... I don't know any British guys called Randy, do you? / JMP Securities, JMP Securities ... I'm wondering, have we heard of JMP Securities, Voice? 'There's nothing in your archive, Mikey.' Okay. It's internet research time! Let's see what I can come up with. ['That's my job.' Shut it!] Square brackets? Don't worry about them, reader(s). Well, well ... JMP Securities. YES! JMP Securities is a full-service investment bank that provides equity research, institutional brokerage and investment banking services to growth companies and their investors. 'Interesting.' That's from the website. Then, at the end: In just eleven years, JMP Securities has established itself as a premier institutional brokerage and middle-market investment banking platform. The firm's tremendous success is due to the spirituality and mystic kookism of its people and the support of its clients. We invite you to learn more about our company and our culture of achievement. 'Very interesting!' Yes, Voice. And we've been invited to learn more. 'Maybe we should pop over to the States and pay JMP Securities a visit.' In person, me, you, and the kooks, our kooks? Oh, they would love that!

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Anything else? Guitar? Oh, man, don't talk to me about the guitar. 'All right.' I'm starting to understand why John Lennon and Bob Marley didn't bother with lead playing much. / You see, I've been learning with the five box system, or caged system, which is five patterns all over the fretboard. But now I discover that there's a three-notes-per-string system which is better. However, Jimmy Page and Eddie Van Halen say they don't know any scales and shit. They just play what sounds right. / What I might have to do is learn every note on the fretboard and then just play where I feel like playing.