Some sad news. Odey Asset Management has had to shut its Japan hedge fund due to poor performance and investor withdrawals. It has fallen from $1.2 billion to $40 million in only two years. Odey's founder, Crispin Odey, released a statement to the press: 'We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun.'
Well, Crispin needs a tonic. A shot in the arm. A boost. And I'm the man for the job. Yes, I have prepared a blessing for him.
O Big Herb, O Ganesh, O lords of the holy cash, O ghosts of the dead financiers, bestow a blessing upon Crispin Odey and all who work at Odey Asset Management. There is a great evil in the markets right now. The credit crunch is the work of the devil! But you masters of money can overcome it all. Oh yes! I pray to you, Crispin prays to you, everyone prays! Send us a sign! Send us money! We will worship you to the end of time. And I speak for Crispin. So bless him. Send him money. Let him have more seasons in the sun.