Thursday, 20 February 2014

How has Maglan Capital gone up 59 per cent?!

I don't believe it! All other hedge funds have gone down, down, down. But Maglan Capital has gone up, up, up. 59 per cent last year! 4 per cent this January! Does that sound right to you, dear reader(s)? David Tawil and Steven Azarbad are the guys behind it, ex-Credit Suisse. I just can't understand it. Are they great immortal geniuses or something? What's going on, man?!

Maybe it's the name of the firm, Maglan. / Do you know what "Maglan" means? No? I'll tell you. Maglan was some bird in the Bible known for her long, down-curved bill, which she used strategically to probe beneath the ground for food. (Strange girl!) She was legendary for her bravery and vitality during harsh weather. Unlike that wimp Dylan, she didn't care about taking shelter from the storm. Also, she was a member of a small, elite special forces unit, specializing in operating behind enemy lines using ... her bill, I suppose. Maglan's missions were kept secret, due to the usual bullshit surrounding such stuff. / So, Davy and Stevie have named their firm after her. Okay. Doesn't really explain anything, does it?

Maybe it's the death of experience. I don't know.

...

Well, well ... / I, er ... / I'm going to forget all about it until after lunch. Then I'll take another look. I'll try to solve the mystery - or add to it.

Oh, in other news, twenty-seven bishops have just attacked David Cameron. ('What with, Mikey?') Brilliant! This is what men of God should be doing. It's what Jesus would be doing if he were alive. Conservatives are the new Romans, man. / Now I just want the Pope to come out and say that all Catholic Conservative voters will be excommunicated. 'What?!' This is a fight between the forces of good and evil, man!!!

[By the way, I've always had a soft spot for Julius Caesar, but he was a pretty immoral guy.]