Sam Morland is retiring

Yeah, Sam is getting out of finance. His OVS Capital Management is shutting down and returning money to investors. I think it's for the best. I want all the other hedge funds in the world to close now. 'And the banks, Mikey!' Yes, Voice, and the banks. We mustn't forget the banks. / I've said it before. I'll say it again. Too many people are wasting their lives on this finance nonsense. It really is time to get out. 'Well, it's nice to have a dream.' Yes, it is. It's very nice.

I pray for the day when there’s nothing to write about ... / One glorious Monday morning, I'll look around the internet and won't be able to find any financial news whatsoever - I mean, genuinely, no news. That's my dream. 'God knows what the squares will do!' Eh? 'The squares, boss, who make their living (such as it is) writing about the people who make all the money.' Oh, they'll have to grow some balls, man, and go out into the world and get real jobs, real lives. 'Ha! That would be something to see.' It certainly would, son. / I've got my music. I'm making a fresh start. I'm getting a grip. Got to keep believing ... you dig, dear reader(s)?

Obviously, I mean no harm. I just want to wake everyone up. I used to think I could do it with the blood and fire in the desert. 'Ha!' However, no one understood. So ... I'm saying, get out! Save yourselves! 'You can't make it any clearer, boss. Are these people thick or something?' They're in a rut, Voice. They've been brainwashed. 'They've been listening to the wrong people.' Yeah, people like George Osborne.

Gideon still imagines there is some kind of economic recovery going on. Maybe for him and his mates.

...

Fuck it! Forget it!

I'm listening to Squeeze. I reckon they have eight or nine classic songs, which is pretty good. Think of all the artists with their Best of collections that only have two or three great songs. (Sometimes only one.) There are bands like Oasis, The Rolling Stones, and The Who who ('What?!') you could argue have about twenty truly great songs. The Beatles? Sixty or seventy. / It's hard to judge though. Some artists have loads of great album tracks that aren't "hit" material. It's all subjective, man. I don't even know why I'm writing about it.

Tempted is Squeeze's best song, I reckon.

[No. 206] Legal & General Investment Management is bugbear central!

This is for Justin Onuekwusi. Death to his bugbear! Death to all bugbears!

And I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[1], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![1], and I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[2], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[1], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![2], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[1], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[2], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![1], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[2], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[1], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![2], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[1], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[1], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[2], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[2], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[1], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![2], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[1], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![1], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[2], and it won't be long, Justin[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![2], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[1], and it won't be long, Justin[2], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[1], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[2], and I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[3], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[2], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![3], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[3], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[3], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![3], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[3], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[3], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![3], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[3], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![3], and it won't be long, Justin[3], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[3], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[3], and

And I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[1], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![1], and I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[2], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[1], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![2], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[1], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[2], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![1], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[2], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[1], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![2], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[1], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[1], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[2], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[2], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[1], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![2], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[1], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![1], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[2], and it won't be long, Justin[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![2], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[1], and it won't be long, Justin[2], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[1], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[2], and I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[3], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[2], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![3], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[3], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[3], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![3], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[3], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[3], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![3], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[3], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![3], and it won't be long, Justin[3], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[3], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[3], and

And I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[1], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![1], and I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[2], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[1], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![2], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[1], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[2], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![1], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[2], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[1], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![2], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[1], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[1], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[2], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[2], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[1], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![2], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[1], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![1], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[2], and it won't be long, Justin[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![2], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[1], and it won't be long, Justin[2], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[1], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[2], and I'm sure Justin ain't the only one[3], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[2], and hold on to your souls!!! / we'll spin this bugbear (hobgoblin!) away if it's the last thing we ever do / this is commitment![3], and one spin, two spins, three spins - more than the THREE?[3], and Justin has to be taken seriously / they seem to have a serious problem at Legal & General Investment Management[3], and / one of Europe's largest institutional asset managers and a major global investor ... infested with bugbears? YES!!![3], and / really?! bugbears?! / it doesn't bear thinking about, does it?[3], and let's get Justin's bugbear DIZZY unto death - yeah, the only "away" these bastards understand[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... here we are, me, Justin, YOU(!) ... and bugbear (for now)[3], and / Our clients include institutional pension funds, financial institutions, local authorities and sovereign wealth funds - tell it to the bugbears!!![3], and how many fund managers have to be driven half insane before the industry does something?[3], and / 'Thank God for Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman!' / Thank you, Voice[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, hold on!!! / bugbear seen better days, ha![3], and it won't be long, Justin[3], and I get so high a-ROUND here ... don't you?[3], and this is what I was born for! / I don't want Justin's money, man / just the satisfaction[3], and

Justin Onuekwusi has got a bugbear

Basically, a hobgoblin. That's what we’re talking about. / Do you remember Justin Onuekwusi, dear reader(s)? I told you last year that he was leaving Aviva Investors to pursue other opportunities. I thought he was going to be smart and get out of finance, but no(!), Justin has turned up at Legal & General Investment Management as a multi-asset fund manager, which is the same job he was doing before. But the grass isn't always greener! Well, certainly not in this case because poor Justin has got a bugbear now. Basically, a hobgoblin.

Justin phoned me late last night: Mikey, can you help me? (What's the problem, Justin?) You know what a bugbear is, yeah? An imaginary being invoked to frighten children, typically a sort of hobgoblin supposed to devour them. (Yeah.) Well, I've got one, man. It latched on to me at the new job. (So? It's imaginary, ain't it? What's the fucking problem?) The problem, Mikey, is that these things are real, you dig? At least mine is. It won't let me sleep at night, and I'm messing up at work. I've started thinking that risk-rated and risk-targeted are the same. That's how confused I am. (Oh, because they have risk in the name, I suppose. Yeah, it sounds serious, Justin, even though you're not a child. But what do you want me to do about it?) Well, you're the shaman. Work your magic! (Work my magic? What's in it for me?) Oh, come on, Mikey. There's nothing I can give a man like you. Unless you want money ... (Forget money, son. I just want you to think about your life. Will you do that for me?) What do you mean? (I mean, why did you leave Aviva Investors just to get mixed up with this bugbear at Legal & General, eh? How is your life any better?) I don't know, Mikey. I don't know what I'm doing any more. (Get out of finance, Justin.) I can't! I'm trapped.

The conversation got a bit personal after that, all his problems ... / Trapped! He's not trapped. Everyone has the power to change their life.

Anyway, after lunch, I'll be taking Justin and his bugbear for a spin, No. 206. The idea is, Justin holds on to his soul while I spin the bugbear away (not the same as yesterday). It'll be a piece of piss.

[No. 205] I'll give everyone a nosebleed

Every word is a punch.

And / come closer[1], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![1], and / come closer[2], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![1], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![2], and it's got to be every spin[1], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![2], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[1], and it's got to be every spin[2], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[1], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[2], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![1], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[2], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![1], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![2], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![1], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![2], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[1], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![2], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[1], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[2], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![1], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[2], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![1], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![2], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![1], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![2], and this is for YOU(!), all this[1], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![2], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[1], and this is for YOU(!), all this[2], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[1], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[2], and / come closer[3], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[2], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![3], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![3], and it's got to be every spin[3], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[3], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[3], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![3], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![3], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![3], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[3], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[3], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![3], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![3], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![3], and this is for YOU(!), all this[3], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[3], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[3], and

And / come closer[1], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![1], and / come closer[2], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![1], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![2], and it's got to be every spin[1], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![2], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[1], and it's got to be every spin[2], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[1], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[2], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![1], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[2], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![1], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![2], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![1], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![2], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[1], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![2], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[1], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[2], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![1], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[2], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![1], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![2], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![1], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![2], and this is for YOU(!), all this[1], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![2], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[1], and this is for YOU(!), all this[2], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[1], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[2], and / come closer[3], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[2], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![3], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![3], and it's got to be every spin[3], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[3], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[3], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![3], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![3], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![3], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[3], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[3], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![3], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![3], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![3], and this is for YOU(!), all this[3], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[3], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[3], and

And / come closer[1], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![1], and / come closer[2], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![1], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![2], and it's got to be every spin[1], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![2], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[1], and it's got to be every spin[2], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[1], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[2], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![1], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[2], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![1], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![2], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![1], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![2], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[1], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![2], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[1], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[2], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![1], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[2], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![1], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![2], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![1], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![2], and this is for YOU(!), all this[1], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![2], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[1], and this is for YOU(!), all this[2], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[1], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[2], and / come closer[3], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[2], and it's got to be every word - if we're serious / Am I serious? You bet![3], and look at this WORD - WHACK!!![3], and it's got to be every spin[3], and / oh, hold on!!! / so DIZZY, yeah?[3], and it's all about greed - I want more spinning, more dizziness, for all of us, you dig?[3], and all the words in the cosmos! / 'Eh?' / Words unknown![3], and if you're not bleeding, if you're not burning, what use are you? / I wanna get back to the good old days![3], and / Whack! Whack! Whack![3], and your nose, ha! / Don't get upset / it's the price you have to pay / wisdom ain't cheap[3], and when the miserable slaves come to me ... / there's nothing I love more than punching some sense into them[3], and it's ... TOUGH LOVE!!![3], and give me a kiss! / oh, it's your blood on my face that will make my day / believe![3], and it's either the fists of my words or the razor of my emotions - real love, real hatred![3], and this is for YOU(!), all this[3], and you're on the floor, yes, physically ... but your soul is away with the fairies[3], and / how do you feel? / do you feel?[3], and

Sebastian Lyon says investors are so greedy now that they're getting nosebleeds

You know Sebastian Lyon, right, the Troy Asset Management guy? I've written about him before. Well, he's moaning about investors getting blood all over his expensive tailor-made suits. He says there's no fear no more when it comes to stocks, only greed. His says investors are bouncing around on a high tightrope - and bleeding all over him. (Move out of the way, Sebastian!) It's the greed that makes them bleed, apparently. / I don't know what he's talking about, to be honest with you, dear reader(s). I only know that in the old days of blood and fire we didn't worry about such stuff, yeah? In the desert if you got blooded, if you got burnt, it was something to be proud of. / Times have changed, man. These kids today ...

...

I'm listening to A Hard Day's Night - the album. Quite a few mistakes, which is cheering me up. If The Beatles are allowed to make mistakes, I am as well. McCartney's voice cracks pretty badly at 1.45 on If I Fell. There's loads of clicking throughout I'll Cry Instead. / I changed my guitar strings yesterday. A lot of my recent bad playing was down to knackered strings. You don't notice until you hear the beautiful sounds of fresh Martin strings. (Light 80/20 bronze, for your information.) / I might watch the A Hard Day's Night film tonight, after my hard day's blogging. Lionel Blair is in the film, dancing around. Each to their own, I suppose.

No. 205? I'll give everyone a nosebleed. You wait and see. / I've got a nice cheese sandwich for lunch, some crisps, a yoghurt, and a can of Coke. No surprises. I don't want any surprises, man.

Gabriel Plotkin wants his own hedge fund

Christ! Give me a break! / Yeah, I'm sick of these characters who want their own hedge funds. (Are you one of them, dear reader{{s}}?!) There's more to life than having your own hedge fund, okay?! Look out the window, man! It's a beautiful sunny day. You could be in the park ... eating an ice cream. You could be improving your bass guitar skills ... getting ready to join my band. / Jesus! Please!

Anyway, who is this Gabriel Plotkin? Oh, he's just some guy who works for Stevie as a portfolio manager. Stevie's going to give Gabby some money when he leaves, a few dollars for ... a new pair of shoes. 'Eh?' / So ... / Is there anything else you need to know, dear reader(s)? 'Mikey -' You probably know more about this shit than me. 'Not really.' I mean, you probably read about it on the Reuters website. 'No. I didn't.' I don't know. And I don't care.

It goes without saying that Gabby - 'Gabby?!' - yeah, it, er, what was I ... yeah, it doesn't need to be said. 'What doesn't?' That, this, er, hedge fund doesn't have a name, you know, the usual pie ... 'Pie?' In ... 'The sky?' Yeah. 'He'll get a name for it, this Gabriel. They all get a name in the end.' Do they? A lot of the time I don't bother to ... check up. It's just an endless stream ...

Obviously, it goes without saying that I wish Mr Plotkin all the best. I'm not going to be a bastard and say that I want the hedge fund to fail. (I would never do that.) It's just ... you know. I get tired of saying it ... you know how I feel by now, surely?

This ... / It's a ... it's a real struggle for me. My head's all over the place this afternoon. I was ... / I've been looking at guitars online. Oh, I know a good workman doesn't blame his tools, but maybe I need a better guitar ... / Maybe I should switch to piano/keyboards. It's easier. I was always ... 'Life on Mars? - ?' Yeah, exactly. / Real easy. And The Jean Genie. 'Nice. Oh, I like The Jean Genie, boss.' We all like The Jean Genie, Voice. It's not jazz though.

Fang, Fang is leaving JPMorgan

Sad. Yeah. I think it's for the best though. / People have been giving Fang, Fang grief about JPMorgan's hiring practices in China. Sons and daughters of officials, you can imagine. 'Can I?' (Fang, Fang is the chief executive for China investment banking, by the way. 'Oh.') I remember when Louie, Louie told me that he didn't want to be a bartender no more. I said to him, "Do what you want to do, son. Life is short." 'And what about Gilly, Gilly, Mikey?' Gilly, Gilly will always be my angel, Voice. I think she's happy doing what she does. She's surrounded by idiots in that fucking zoo they call a newspaper. But it's her choice. 'She no doubt gets a kick out of it.' I don't know, man.

...

Anything else, on a sunny Monday morning? 'It's cold, boss.' Yeah. Why do you care? / Er, well, I've found a website, What Goes On, dedicated to Beatles recording mistakes. It's making me feel a bit better about all my recording mistakes. / If you listen to Hey Jude at 2.58, you can hear someone (probably McCartney after playing the wrong chord on the piano) say "Fucking hell!" 'Fucking hell, Mikey!' Yeah. And if you listen to Let It Be at 1.07, you can hear George Harrison whisper "Stop it, John." Fascinating stuff! / 'And if you listen to Gilly, Gilly ...' Kids in the street, man. Digging the groove, you dig?

...

Louie, Louie - ? Well, I don't think the lyrics are as obscene as the Feds thought they were, but the drummer (in The Kingsmen) does seem to say "Fuck!" after the second chorus. He made a mistake, too - with his sticks, apparently. / BUT THAT'S THE CRAZY WORLD OF ROCK AND ROLL. And you're working in a bank or a hedge fund, dear reader(s). Are you sure you don't want to join my band?

...

Er ... 'Mikey, Mikey!' Shut up, Voice. You're not funny. / Lunch? Too early for lunch, but I'm starving.

Maybe one day scholars will go through this blog looking for all the "mistakes" of the Voice. Or maybe they won't bother.

[No. 204] Is finance making you ill? You need to get more than THREE!

That's my advice.

And / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[1], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[1], and / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[2], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![1], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[2], and / COME ON!!![1], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![2], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[1], and / COME ON!!![2], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[1], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[2], and I get so lonely[1], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[2], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[1], and I get so lonely[2], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![1], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[2], and / Faster!!![1], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![2], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[1], and / Faster!!![2], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[1], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[2], and / Don't be scared[1], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[2], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[1], and / Don't be scared[2], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[1], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[2], and / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[3], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[2], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[3], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![3], and / COME ON!!![3], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[3], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[3], and I get so lonely[3], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[3], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![3], and / Faster!!![3], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[3], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[3], and / Don't be scared[3], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[3], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[3], and

And / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[1], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[1], and / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[2], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![1], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[2], and / COME ON!!![1], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![2], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[1], and / COME ON!!![2], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[1], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[2], and I get so lonely[1], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[2], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[1], and I get so lonely[2], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![1], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[2], and / Faster!!![1], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![2], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[1], and / Faster!!![2], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[1], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[2], and / Don't be scared[1], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[2], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[1], and / Don't be scared[2], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[1], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[2], and / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[3], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[2], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[3], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![3], and / COME ON!!![3], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[3], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[3], and I get so lonely[3], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[3], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![3], and / Faster!!![3], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[3], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[3], and / Don't be scared[3], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[3], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[3], and

And / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[1], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[1], and / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[2], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![1], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[2], and / COME ON!!![1], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![2], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[1], and / COME ON!!![2], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[1], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[2], and I get so lonely[1], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[2], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[1], and I get so lonely[2], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![1], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[2], and / Faster!!![1], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![2], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[1], and / Faster!!![2], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[1], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[2], and / Don't be scared[1], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[2], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[1], and / Don't be scared[2], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[1], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[2], and / Why are we here? / We want to get a-ROUND, surely? / to be all we can be / to be more than THREE / Let's get beyond!!! (!!!) ...[3], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[2], and / I, er ... Have you ever been beyond the THREE?[3], and what are YOU(!) waiting for? / your soul won't spin itself, you know, so get busy, get DIZZY![3], and / COME ON!!![3], and I know you're depressed, man / I know how much you hate your boss[3], and / How much money do you actually need, man? / Forget work, spend more of your time here with me, please[3], and I get so lonely[3], and beyond the THREE you will get the surprise of your life / try to believe in the magic[3], and you've got to let go ... the words / let them go, and let them mean NOTHING / and go faster![3], and / Faster!!![3], and when your mind is empty / when you're DIZZY / Oh, I love you / you hate your boss[3], and you're leaving your job because you don't need it no more / Nature will provide ... probably[3], and / Don't be scared[3], and / Soon, you'll be more than THREE / Money will grow on trees if you want it to[3], and maybe you should take your clothes off now[3], and

Paul Capital is shutting down

Private equity, secondary market stuff, I don't know. / Er ... right, Paul Capital is a global alternative investment firm committed to creative and innovative solutions that provide flexibility, optionality, and insight for institutional investors around the world. / Well, it was. It's shutting down now. 'Oh no!' Yeah, they were going to sell, man, but it didn't work out. 'Never mind.' I think it's for the best, don't you? Philip Paul has enough money. 'Who is Philip Paul, boss?' Christ, Voice! Philip Paul founded Paul Capital in 1991. 'Oh.' Mr Paul has more than twenty-five years of private equity experience, having served on more than thirty VC-based boards of directors. 'What?!' Thirty, son! Thirty! He was previously Chairman and CEO of Hillman Ventures, one of the most active private equity investors in the Seventies and Eighties. During his tenure at Hillman Ventures, Mr Paul was a founding investor in several venture capital funds. He was active with loads of private equity managers before they actually formed the funds for which they are so well known today! 'Bloody hell! I didn't realize, Mikey! He deserves a rest.' Of course he does! But not just our Phil. 'Eh?' As I keep saying, everyone working in finance needs a rest, a permanent one. / Dear reader(s), I don't know what the deal is with you. I don't know what motivates you. Maybe you're a fucking lunatic. What do I know? But I'm sure you have enough money by now. Don't you think you should call it a day? There are other things you could be doing with your life. I'm not going to be writing this blog forever. I'm trying to get out. I've got my music. What have you got?

God!!! I feel like I'm talking to a brick wall sometimes. Why do you keep coming here, reader(s)? This is the blog for people who hate finance, yeah? (Not money, just finance.) / It's no good, all the grief, the stress. Something's got to change in your life. You can't go on like this!

Look, if you're in the office, just pop to the toilet for a few minutes. Sit in the cubicle. And think.

Would it be so terrible if you walked out today? Come on. Your boss is an idiot. Why don't you tell him (or her) how you feel? Get it out of your system, man. And then walk out that door.

Freedom is waiting for you ... Grab it with both hands, today!!!

[No. 203] I don't wanna hear about no bingo Budget, man!

Bingo? WTF?!

And it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[1], and / I don't give a shit!!![1], and it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[2], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![1], and / I don't give a shit!!![2], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[1], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![2], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[1], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[2], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![1], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[2], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![1], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![2], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![1], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![2], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[1], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![2], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[1], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[2], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[1], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[2], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[1], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[2], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[1], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[2], and it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[3], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[2], and / I don't give a shit!!![3], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![3], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[3], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[3], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![3], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![3], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![3], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[3], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[3], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[3], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[3], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[3], and

And it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[1], and / I don't give a shit!!![1], and it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[2], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![1], and / I don't give a shit!!![2], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[1], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![2], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[1], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[2], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![1], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[2], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![1], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![2], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![1], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![2], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[1], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![2], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[1], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[2], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[1], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[2], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[1], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[2], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[1], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[2], and it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[3], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[2], and / I don't give a shit!!![3], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![3], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[3], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[3], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![3], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![3], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![3], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[3], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[3], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[3], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[3], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[3], and

And it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[1], and / I don't give a shit!!![1], and it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[2], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![1], and / I don't give a shit!!![2], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[1], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![2], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[1], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[2], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![1], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[2], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![1], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![2], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![1], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![2], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[1], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![2], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[1], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[2], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[1], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[2], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[1], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[2], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[1], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[2], and it's going to be party time BIG TIME(!) for all the bingo freaks / really, who gives a shit, eh?[3], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[2], and / I don't give a shit!!![3], and makers, doers, fakers, liars, shakers - what?! / and no Budget at all, please![3], and I'd like to get Gideon a-ROUND ... in a boxing ring, so DIZZY / and bring Mike Tyson out of retirement[3], and screw the bingo Budget, man! / oh, lose yourself, my friend, save yourself, now[3], and what did we expect? / bingo for the slaves, ha![3], and a penny off a pint? / I feel like getting pissed![3], and the government is on our side, yippee! / 'Does that include all the people down at the food banks, Mikey?' / Grow up, Voice![3], and no Budget at all, please! / No, no, no ...[3], and if we close our eyes, will all the awful fascists go away, leaving us ... in something like the Garden of Eden? / 'Er ... no'[3], and how much does a pasty cost these days, a thousand pounds? / That's mostly tax, you know[3], and shakers, takers, fakers, movers, schmoozers ... BINGO!!! / No, no, no, no, no, no[3], and when has Gideon ever played ... bingo? / What's his game, eh?[3], and

Is there a Budget today?

I couldn't care less, man. It's just going to be lies and nonsense. I know it, you know it, and George Osborne knows it. / I bet he's going to promise us more austerity. 'Great! That's what we want.' Of course, if the Tories collected all the right amounts of tax from their friends there wouldn't be any need for the poor in rags to crawl to their local food bank every day and beg for crumbs, but I'm sure Gideon knows best. 'What?!' Okay, well, I exaggerated the poor shit, man. We're not a Third World country - yet.

Oh, let's forget! / The Foreign Legion? No, I'm too old for that now. All I want to do is play my guitar, and get a-ROUND - later, No. 203, after lunch, you dig? It's the only stuff that makes sense to me in this crazy world of ours. / I'm still thinking about Malibu. I've gotta get free! 'Or more than THREE, Mikey!' Yeah, Voice. Or over the rainbow. Yeah, I'd like to be over the rainbow in Malibu and totally gone with one of my conceptual posts beyond the THREE!

...

Tissue ... / I'm just going to sit here and bleed, like in Reservoir Dogs. (I cut myself shaving a couple of hours ago. It hasn't stopped. I touched it again and ... don't worry about it.) I've got some music on, dear reader(s). Oh yeah. I've made a playlist of pop songs to get me in the mood for (maybe) writing something later. / Hey ya!

Is there a Budget today? Oh, I couldn't care less, man. Don't you understand? I've got different fish to fry. 'So, is there a Budget today, boss?' I don't want to know about it!

'Give us a clue, boss!' The clothes you're wearing, girl, they're causing public scenes. I'm not your steppin' stone. 'Eh?!' Nothing ...

Carl Icahn is just talking "noise"

Yeah, "noise", the polite word for "shit". / That's not me saying that. It's John Donahoe, the CEO of eBay. But I can understand why John is upset. Carl Icahn is sticking his nose into eBay. He wants the firm to spin off its PayPal division, and he's moaning about the sale of Skype from a few years ago. 'Ancient history.' Yeah.

Crazy! 'Mad!' / Yes, I can understand why John is pissed off because I've had my own trouble with Carl. Just before Christmas last year, Carl popped round to see me. 'Did he?' Yeah. I saw him stomping up the street and thought to myself: "Oh no, what does he want?" Well, I soon found out. He wanted me to sell my acoustic guitar!!! 'Ha! I remember that, Mikey.' Yeah. The nerve of the guy. I told him that I needed my guitar for writing my songs, and recording and that. Carl said I should use my other guitar. 'Ha!' I told him the other guitar was a piece of crap from Argos. 'Yeah.' The one he wanted me to sell was the nice Yamaha one. 'What a comedian!' I know, Voice. Anyway, he said that he would start talking to the media - you know, try to put pressure on me to sell. 'He's a nutcase!' I know, Voice. I told him to piss off. 'You actually kicked him out of the house, didn't you, boss?' Yeah, I did. Well ... I pushed him out the fucking door, man. I was really angry.

So, I can sympathize with John Donahoe. He's got to stay strong though. Just ignore the ... "shit".

...

By the way, if any journalists talk to Carl about this, he's going to say that I don't look after my guitar properly, that I don't clean it or change the strings. He'll say I don't deserve a Yamaha. Nonsense! Absolute nonsense! I do look after it. I've banged it a bit, and it's got a few scratches on it. Carl will try to twist that. But don't listen to him, dear reader(s). I play it all the time, for Christ's sake! It's obviously not going to be in perfect condition like the day I bought it.

There ain't no finance on a sunny Sunday afternoon

I don't care what anyone says. 'No, boss?' No, Voice. There ain't no finance on a sunny Sunday afternoon, son. And that's the way it should be. If you're in the office today, dear reader(s), think about what you're doing with your life. Please.

Also, there won't be any finance tomorrow. 'What?! Are you serious?' I'm taking the day off. I suggest you do the same. 'Me?' The reader(s). Maybe forever. Why don't you buy a guitar? 'Me? I ain't got no hands!' The reader(s), fool!

So, so, so ... er. / Yeah, I'll be going around (a-ROUND? no) the shops in London on Monday. Relaxing, having a nice time, in the sunshine (hopefully) before my fresh start on Tuesday. 'Oh, not another fresh start, Mikey!' Yes, another one. And I'm serious this time, man. That Prince book has given me a new determination. / I've finished it, by the way, dear reader(s). It was good for facts and figures. A bit bizarre in places though. 'Why?' Well, one example: the writer ends by raving about Prince's deal with Target (a discount store in America) like it's the greatest achievement of Prince's life. / But there's lots of good stuff in the book about Prince's work ethic. Like how he once worked a forty-hour weekend - which was his idea of taking it easy, because at other times he would work for three days without any sleep and hardly any breaks.

My music? 'Yeah, go on.' I haven't tried recording You're Lying lately. However, I'm thinking my guitar skills may be up to the job now, so I'll try again this week. It's not just the guitar playing, you know. It's being able to sing decently at the same time as well. And avoiding mistakes, background noises, that sort of thing. / Note: I reckon You're Lying is better than any of Prince's songs. It's not all about performance, you dig?

Er ... what else? / 'Nothing.' Nothing, nothing else. I'll stop writing, you'll stop reading ... Let us let go of it all!!!

[No. 202] Christopher Legge, a man after my own heart

Yeah! School of Hard Knocks, a nice garden, and getting a-ROUND. I'm more than a little impressed.

And let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[1], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![1], and let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[2], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[1], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![2], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[1], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[2], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[1], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[2], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![1], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[2], and Chris has done his gardening already[1], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![2], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![1], and Chris has done his gardening already[2], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[1], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![2], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[1], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[2], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[1], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[2], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[1], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[2], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[1], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[2], and / vision gone![1], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[2], and let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[3], and / vision gone![2], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![3], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[3], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[3], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[3], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![3], and Chris has done his gardening already[3], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![3], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[3], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[3], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[3], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[3], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[3], and / vision gone![3], and

And let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[1], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![1], and let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[2], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[1], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![2], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[1], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[2], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[1], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[2], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![1], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[2], and Chris has done his gardening already[1], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![2], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![1], and Chris has done his gardening already[2], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[1], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![2], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[1], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[2], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[1], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[2], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[1], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[2], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[1], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[2], and / vision gone![1], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[2], and let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[3], and / vision gone![2], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![3], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[3], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[3], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[3], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![3], and Chris has done his gardening already[3], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![3], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[3], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[3], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[3], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[3], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[3], and / vision gone![3], and

And let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[1], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![1], and let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[2], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[1], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![2], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[1], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[2], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[1], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[2], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![1], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[2], and Chris has done his gardening already[1], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![2], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![1], and Chris has done his gardening already[2], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[1], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![2], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[1], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[2], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[1], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[2], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[1], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[2], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[1], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[2], and / vision gone![1], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[2], and let's say his name, three times ... Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge, Christopher Legge / what will happen?[3], and / vision gone![2], and this ... magic! / here he is, our Chris / Hello![3], and here he is / THE MASTER OF DISASTER / a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... for the sheer hell of it[3], and / Finance is ... hell, baby[3], and Ashcourt Rowan Asett(?!) Management - ?!?!?!?! / Oh, I don't know, man / maybe it's an imposter, not impossible[3], and / No! ... he's a man in a hurry / that explains it![3], and Chris has done his gardening already[3], and we'll get him off that blasted door and back behind a desk in no time - he won't have time for no garden![3], and Ash-court Rowan, and Ashcourt Rowan, and Ash ... Chris-to-pher - yeah! ... come on, beyond the THREE, you dig?[3], and / 'We don't want the whole firm showing up, Mikey!' / Oh, good point, Voice[3], and I have to admit ... I'm too DIZZY for the lot of them, so ...[3], and / slow down now relax we need to chill a bit let the chaos go before disaster strikes - ha! ... are we bothered?[3], and / the sun is out! ... and I'm thinking of that garden / I want the summer, flowers and bees ...[3], and / vision gone![3], and

Chris Legge is going to be the new doorman at Ashcourt Rowan Asset Management

Well ... 'What?!' / It's a shame really because Chris Legge had a very good job at Brewin Dolphin. I mean, he was the business development manager at Brewin. 'Are you sure about this, Mikey?' Yes, Voice. This is a quote from Chris himself: "I look forward to reviewing old acquaintances and opening doors at Ashcourt Rowan." You see? 'Bloody hell! You're right.' Yeah. The thing about Chris though, he went to the School of Hard Knocks - the same place I went to. 'Right. So ...' So, it won't bother him at all, this new position. 'It's just the economy at the moment, boss.' I know, Voice. We're all having to do stuff we wouldn't normally choose to do.

By the way, dear reader(s), I've been looking at Chris' LinkedIn profile. I won't link to it because it's a bit of a mess. I want to give him time to sort it out. He says he cares about arts and culture and disaster. What the fuck does that mean? Also, he mentions THREE TIMES that he's at Ashcourt Rowan now. 'Three times? He sounds like a guy after your own heart!' What do you mean? 'You know, a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND.' You might have something there, Voice. 'Maybe you should write a conceptual post about him.' No. 202? Yeah! Why not?

Later ... / After lunch. After my egg sandwich. Afternoon, and into the night! These conceptuals of mine take time to get together, man. I'm an artist, after all. A great one. I care about the arts and culture. And, I must admit, I have a soft spot for ... DISASTER!!! / Laters ...

[No. 201] I only want to see you spinning a-ROUND in the purple rain

And be some kind of friend, obviously.

And ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[1], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[1], and ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![1], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[2], and forget ... pain[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![2], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![1], and forget ... pain[2], and / I've got my guitar![1], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![2], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[1], and / I've got my guitar![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![1], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[2], and forget ... sorrow[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![2], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![1], and forget ... sorrow[2], and I might ... get desperate, soon[1], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![2], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[1], and I might ... get desperate, soon[2], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[1], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[2], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![1], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[2], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![1], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![2], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[1], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![2], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[1], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[2], and ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[3], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[2], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![3], and forget ... pain[3], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![3], and / I've got my guitar![3], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![3], and forget ... sorrow[3], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![3], and I might ... get desperate, soon[3], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[3], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[3], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![3], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![3], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[3], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[3], and

And ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[1], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[1], and ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![1], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[2], and forget ... pain[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![2], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![1], and forget ... pain[2], and / I've got my guitar![1], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![2], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[1], and / I've got my guitar![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![1], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[2], and forget ... sorrow[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![2], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![1], and forget ... sorrow[2], and I might ... get desperate, soon[1], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![2], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[1], and I might ... get desperate, soon[2], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[1], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[2], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![1], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[2], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![1], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![2], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[1], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![2], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[1], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[2], and ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[3], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[2], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![3], and forget ... pain[3], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![3], and / I've got my guitar![3], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![3], and forget ... sorrow[3], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![3], and I might ... get desperate, soon[3], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[3], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[3], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![3], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![3], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[3], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[3], and

And ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[1], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[1], and ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![1], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[2], and forget ... pain[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![2], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![1], and forget ... pain[2], and / I've got my guitar![1], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![2], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[1], and / I've got my guitar![2], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![1], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[2], and forget ... sorrow[1], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![2], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![1], and forget ... sorrow[2], and I might ... get desperate, soon[1], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![2], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[1], and I might ... get desperate, soon[2], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[1], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[2], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![1], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[2], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![1], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![2], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[1], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![2], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[1], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[2], and ... to see you spinning, yeah? / in the purple rain, in the purple rain, in the purple rain ...[3], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[2], and don't ask me why ... well, I need to get my kicks / and you need to let your hair down a bit, hot thang - ?[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no pain![3], and forget ... pain[3], and YOU(!)! ... say you want a leader - oh, it's me![3], and / I've got my guitar![3], and I know, I know, I know ... times are changin' / and this is something NEW(!)[3], and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND, and a-ROUND ... no sorrow![3], and forget ... sorrow[3], and if you've got a fucking clue ... what I'm writing about, come on, raise your hand![3], and I might ... get desperate, soon[3], and this is my only escape/refuge ... for the time being / like a photograph of a beach house in Malibu[3], and here is the purple rain / the only way I want to see you / yeah, you / in this moment[3], and I ain't got no frilly shirt / but give me a chance to guide you![3], and I ain't got no flashy dance moves / but I'll be more than a three-spin lover![3], and / wow! / so DIZZY!!!yes[3], and, er ... what have I got? / three chords, the truth[3], and