Wednesday, 12 August 2015

Sanlam Wealth Planning has bought FA Watts Investment Managers

Yes, FA Watts, which is a very sweet company, apparently. Oh, do you remember this, dear reader(s)?

Bought? Acquired? It's all the same to me. Yes, the masters of evil have struck again. Or rather their holding company has, Principal Holdings. Or rather their parent company has, Sanlam. With Lukas van der Walt lurking in the shadows. Whatever. I don't know how it works. I'm not an expert on these matters. All I can tell you, my friend, is that the two/three/four firms are going to merge now. Yes, Border Asset Management is joining forces with those demonic freaks, Principal Investment Management, Principal Holdings, or Sanlam. [I wish I could understand. I'm just a simple shaman.] Why oh why oh why?

No, neither do I. Never mind. / It might be a different company anyway. Alex Morley is the chief executive of Sanlam Wealth Planning. And Lukas van der Walt is the chief executive of, er, Sanlam ... Investment and Pension(?). They're probably related. 'They might be cousins or something, boss.' Who, Voice? Who the fuck are you talking about?! 'Alex and Lucas, man. They might be cousins.' I meant the firms, idiot! Sanlam is obviously the parent company. 'You reckon?' I don't know. It's too complicated for me.

Well, well ... / And Richard Stocks, Michael Mason, and Simon Gooding? 'Who are they, boss?' Voice, these characters are men - real men, by the way - with the right attitudes and the right behaviours. 'Oh.' Yeah. Big time. There shouldn't be a problem.

I can only wish them the best of luck. / Good luck, guys!


Oh, I'm not in the mood for finance, reader(s). Kids get six weeks off in the summer. What do I get? Five days in St Ives.

Music? I'm listening to AC/DC, Powerage. A great album! / There's a Bon Scott statue in Fremantle, Australia. Or so "they" say. I was in Fremantle in 2001. But I didn't see it. 'The statue has only been there since 2008.' How do you know? 'The internet, Mikey. Research, yeah? You should try it sometime.' Shut it, you slag! That's what I pay you for, ain't it? 'Ha!' Ha!