Wednesday, 26 July 2017

Perfecto has got Mickey Carus for its pretty clouds in the sky

Well, well ... / Well, this is a nice story. It's a nice break from finance, actually. Perfecto is the company that creates all the lovely, fluffy clouds we see in the sky on a regular basis. I mean, we see them on a regular basis ... if we're outside and looking up and dreaming, and not just going about our stupid business like sick, depraved animals in this cold world. 'Er ...' It's very similar to that rainbow seeding thing I was writing about the other week. Perfecto just plant cloud seeds instead. I think - 'Boss!' What, Voice? 'Look -'

Perfecto is the leading cloud-based platform for web, mobile and IoT software testing, empowering global enterprises with the tools they need to deliver better digital experiences for their users. With Perfecto, developers, testers can implement continuous testing throughout the DevOps cycle, using the most reliable lab offering real browsers, smartphones and devices using real-world networks, locations and scenarios. With more than 3,000 customers across all major industries, Perfecto is enabling faster release cycles that set the speed of digital innovation.

What the hell is that?! 'That's the company you're writing about, Perfecto. Nothing to do with pretty clouds in the sky. It's an internet thing. A cloud-based platform.' A what?! 'A cloud-based platform.' So ... it has got clouds in it, then? And it is in the fucking sky! Just like I said. 'No. It's an internet thing.'

Right. Okay, dear reader(s), who is this Mickey Carus character, when he's at home?

July 25, 2017 - Perfecto, creator of the leading cloud-based platform for web, mobile and IoT app testing, announced the appointment of Mickey Carus as Chief Financial Officer. With over 20 years of experience as a technology industry executive, Carus brings an extensive background in corporate strategy, administration, M&A, IPO readiness and planning to the table. Carus has a proven track record of profitably scaling companies, which makes him the ideal candidate to support the Perfecto team as they optimize DevOps pipelines by enabling continuous testing.

Okay, okay. He's the chief financial officer. Good for him. I hope he's happy. / Christ! I feel like heading out into the rain. I want to get some real clouds into my life, you dig? Back to nature! Susie will come with me. We'll have a great time.

"Michael has a proven track record of working with a wide variety of companies, from startups to enterprise-level organizations. With Michael spearheading our financial initiatives, we're well equipped to extend our growth trajectory, continue to attract new talent, and position the company for future capital events," said Eran Yaniv, CEO at Perfecto. "We're thrilled to welcome Michael to the team. His experience makes him the perfect candidate to own our long-term financial outlook and guide our profitable growth."

Ha! No, no, no, dear reader(s). Eran wasn't talking about me, obviously. He meant Mickey Carus. 'We call you Mikey, anyway, boss.' Yes, thank you, Voice. / I'm depressed now. I feel like eating a chicken soaked in chlorine. That might cheer me up. 'But you're a vegetarian, boss!' I'm joking, man.

Yes, I'll be all right when the Brexit apocalypse starts to kick in. While you're all eating your polluted chickens, I'll be eating my cheese or egg sandwiches. Ha!